


Escort

by Zapino



Category: Troyler (Youtube RPF), Troyler - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF, Youtube RPF, youtube - Fandom
Genre: AU, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Romance, Shameless Smut, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-30
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-04-06 23:03:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 116,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4240008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zapino/pseuds/Zapino
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>-AU- Troye has been set up on a blind date for a company event night by Caspar - his caring, but highly unpredictable friend. The man that shows up at his door turns out to be someone, or rather - something -, Troye could have never expected. Can he get past the awkward situation he's been put in and enjoy himself? Troye is not so sure... </p><p>    Giving in to Tyler's advances, Troye finds himself in a very strange yet, physically, very satisfying situation. As time progresses, so does the relationship between the two unlikely lovers.</p><p>    But will the fine balance between sex and romance stay the way it is? Or will it all fall into ruin because of their resistance to fall for each other?</p><p>(<strong>Now available in Russian, here!</strong>: http://archiveofourown.org/works/4587765/chapters/10450392)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

# Escort

"Are you telling me you don't have a date for tomorrow night?" Caspar eyed him over his cup of steaming coffee, sipping it carefully while waiting for Troye's answer.

Troye looked up from his foamed cappuccino where he'd just stirred in some sweetener. He tapped his spoon on the side of his cup before laying it on the little plate where a chocolate chip cookie had resided not 30 seconds ago, now settling nicely in his stomach.

"Well no, but that's not a big deal, right?" he shrugged. "I mean, I'm not seeing anyone at the moment, and I can't just grab someone random off the street, can I?" Troye gestured at the window beside their booth, indicating the crowds passing by on the sunlit sidewalk outside. He knew exactly where this conversation was heading, which was why he went on the defensive so quickly.

Caspar and he were on a break from work, taking refuge in their favorite little coffee shop just on the corner by their office. Having a boring old desk job was the last thing Troye thought he'd end up doing, but life had other plans than what he'd dreamt of as a teenager, and as it turns out, money for rent and food and all that has to come from somewhere. The music industry proved much more difficult to break into than Troye had thought, despite his parent’s insistence on him reconsidering his decision to move to another continent in search of his dreams. They never understood the need for the drastic move and had pleaded with him to at least stay in Australia to build up a web of contacts to draw from once he set out on his adventure.

But Troye had been eager to leave, not realizing the common sense in their words until it was too late. So now, just on the brink of turning 22, Troye was starting to accept that perhaps his professional career wouldn't be as exciting as he'd thought and that having any job was better than the alternative. Working at the accountant firm put dinner on his table and he wasn't all that fussed about it anymore really. At least he'd made friends with a few of his colleagues and Caspar was one of his more trusted companions, even if he could be random at best and always teased him about his close to non-existent love-life.

Who had the energy to date these days, anyway?

"'At the moment'?" Caspar repeated his words back at him with a quirk of an eyebrow, setting the cup down on its saucer with a rattle. "Troye, last I heard of you even mentioning another guy in the capacity of a potential fuck -," Troye winced at his casual use of the crude word, "- was literally ages ago."

Caspar paused, frowning and looking up at the ceiling in thought for a moment before he continued, "Actually, I don't think I've seen you with anyone since the office Halloween party. That's, what? Seven months ago?" His frown deepened. "What happened to that guy, anyway?"

Troye squirmed in his seat, looking down at his hands as the fiddled with his cup, avoiding Caspar's meaningful stare. He didn't like to be reminded of the momentary mental relapse of his that was David from human resources.

Troye had been more intoxicated than he could remember ever being, both before and after that night. Tall, dark, and brooding had seemed to be just what drunk Troye had been looking for, though, as towards the dwindling end of the party, he'd found himself sloppily making out with Batman.

Or David, as it turned out that following Monday. In the sober light of day, and without costume-enhancements, Troye found that while David seemed like a nice guy, they hadn't really clicked right. And by 'not clicking' he meant that David was the blandest person he'd ever spoken to, judging by the short conversation they'd had when bumping in to each other in the lunch queue that same Monday.

Troye had received messages from David for over a week after that, asking for them to meet over coffee or lunch, but Troye had resolutely ignored him, too embarrassed to even begin to try to reply. David was coming off too desperate, saying how Troye was the prettiest man he'd ever seen and such nonsense. Running into him in the lobby had left Troye quickly ducking out of the way to find escape routes ever since. Caspar hadn't stopped teasing him about it for weeks.

Hoping to avoid having to answer Caspar's last question, Troye shrugged. "I don't get what that has to do with anything," he mumbled, feeling a slight blush warm his cheeks, just like they always did when the conversation steered towards anything regarding his sex life, not to mention his little slip at Halloween.

Troye wasn't really comfortable discussing his intimate life, much to the enjoyment of people such as Caspar. The South African was one of those people who'd casually talk about his one night stands, going into great detail about the talents of the girls he met. He seemed to think that making Troye uncomfortable was some type of sport. If it was, Caspar would be the holder of the world record.

"That's because you're basically a virgin again. It clouds your mind," Caspar deadpanned and Troye snorted.

After a few moments, though, Caspar bent his head down a bit before continuing in a lower voice, "But in all seriousness, Troye. I know you haven't been seeing anyone since that party, and I just really want you to have a good time tomorrow. Alright?"

It didn't happen much while out in the open, but when Caspar showed his caring side, Troye was really grateful that they'd found each other. He was a good friend and he looked out for Troye, almost like a big brother, even if he hid it well behind the constant teasing.

"I know, Cas," Troye answered with a sigh. "It's just that I still don't know if that makes it worth actually trying to find a date for an event taking place tomorrow night." Troye ran a hand through his hair.

Wracking his brain, Troye couldn't think of anyone to ask to the benefit. The only people he knew in L.A. where the ones he worked with and that was a mistake he was unwilling to repeat. Oh, and the little old Asian man who ran the convenience store on his apartment block, but Troye had his limits.

He slowly shook his head. "It's very short notice, you know."

Caspar reached for a napkin in the little holder on the table, shook it out with a nonchalant air, and started to seemingly absentmindedly fold it into what would be a water lily. Troye kept his eyes on his face, though, waiting for a response.

After a few moments of folding, Caspar opened his mouth to speak again, not looking up from his little arts and crafts project. "Why don't you let me worry about that, sweet cheeks."

Troye frowned at the pet name. Caspar knew very well that he hated when he called him that, but he continued, ignoring Troye's indignant huff, "You just focus on looking pretty tomorrow night, and I'll have someone meet you at your place right on time to take you to the benefit." With a flurry of his hands, he presented Troye with the finished paper flower.

"Wait, are you setting me up on a blind date?" Troye asked incredulously while eyeing the flower as if it had offended him. He hated blind dates.

The idea of having to spend the entire evening with a complete stranger did not sound appealing to him in the least, knowing how he behaved around new people the first few times he met them. Some called him shy, but Troye preferred to think of it as being a bit guarded, wanting to get a glimpse of their personality and to see if they could be trusted before he allowed them to get closer. Besides, there's no telling what nutcase Caspar might send to his door.

But something about what Caspar had said earlier made him hesitate. He had, after all, been single for quite some time. What did he really gain from letting his youth waste away in his apartment all on his lonesome while dreaming of the day he met someone? He knew it wouldn't happen without any effort on his part. People didn't just bump into their soulmate in a sleepy autumn marketplace, while buying fresh lettuce or something equally ludicrous as they did in the silly romantic movies he liked to watch. Not that he was looking for something quite as serious as a soulmate right now, but the point was still the same. And since he hadn't gone to any marketplaces lately, looking to buy his greens, his chances were slim either way.

"In a manner of speaking; yes. A blind date," Caspar nodded. "Let's just say I know people who know people, and I promise you won't be disappointed."

Troye chewed his bottom lip in thought while contemplating Caspar's cryptic words. Perhaps he could give this a try, if nothing else than for the off chance of his crazy South African friend actually doing something like this right for once.

Caspar moved his hand closer to Troye, still hovering between them, motioning for him to take the folded napkin. The sickeningly sweet smile on his animated face and the fluttering of his eyelashes had Troye narrowing his eyes at him and snatching the lily from his outstretched hand, crumbling it between his fingers.

The cheerfulness on Caspar's face fell as he watched his artwork fall apart in Troye's fist, and he looked up to meet his eyes while gulping audibly. Troye hoped he conveyed that he meant business when he spoke his next words.

"I can't believe I'm going along with this, but I'm actually giving you the benefit of a doubt here, Caspar. And if you mess this up, or treat this as one of your jokes, I swear to every deity above, I will post the photo of you riding that mechanical bull in nothing but a pair of chaps on every notice board in the office by Monday morning."

Caspar's eyes widened.

"Oh, yeah, you know what picture I'm talking about..." Troye trailed off, lowering his voice threateningly. "Now, get this right, or I'll get you. Are we clear?" He finished, reaching forward and opening his palm to offer the crumbled napkin back to his friend.

"Crystal," Caspar sighed dejectedly and grabbed the balled up wad of paper, looking like someone had told him there wouldn't be a Christmas this year.

"Good. Now, we better get back to work, or Mrs. Clayden will think we've gotten lost in the basement archives again."

Troye rose from his seat, not looking back to see if Caspar was following, wordlessly letting it be known that he didn't expect to pay for this round. Coffee could damn well be on Caspar today.

Troye just hoped he didn't ruin his night tomorrow by setting him up with someone he wouldn't at least be able to carry on a polite conversation with. That was all he was asking for and anything more than that would be a bonus.

As he exited the door, jingling the little bell on the door frame above his head, Troye sent up a silent prayer for there to be bonuses.

-x-

Troye's brow was scrunched up in annoyance as he stood in front of the floor to ceiling mirrored sliding doors of the wardrobe inside his bedroom, his socked toes scrunched up into the thick carpet underneath his feet.

Huffing loudly, he shifted between holding his left and then his right hand just under his neck, a tie of just slightly different design in each. He'd been doing this back-and-forth thing for a few minutes now, not coming any closer to deciding which tie went better with his outfit. They were both black, so the color wasn't really the issue, since they both went with his midnight blue long sleeve button down. It was the width that was driving him mad with confusion.

To be honest, though, it wasn't really the state of his outfit that had him fidgeting. He knew he was nervous for tonight's blind date, and he rued the day when he'd agreed to let Caspar put him through this… Which had been yesterday, but that was beside the point.

Knowing Caspar, there could quite literally be a clown showing at his door to pick him up. Or a stripper dressed as a cowboy. Or a chimpanzee with a bow tie.  
He wouldn't put anything past Caspar, but he hoped his threat yesterday had staved off the worst of those options. Troye just couldn't decide which one that would be. Perhaps a chimp would provide rather good company.

Pulling himself out of his thoughts, he narrowed his eyes at the ties once again. But before he could throw the tantrum he felt was beginning to brew and just pull out the scissors on both ties in frustration, the sudden ring of the doorbell made him jump.

The initial surprise had his heart beating fast in shock, which quickly transitioned into a wilder beat when it clicked in Troye's mind that his date for the night was standing at his door. He glanced at the clock beside his bed and sure enough, it was nearing six PM, which was perfect timing, considering the event started at seven and there was bound to be traffic.

Taking a deep steadying breath, Troye gave himself one last determined look in the mirror before turning to head out of his bedroom.

He shuffled out into the hallway, silent on his feet, and crept up to look out through the little hole. Spying the back of a blond head of hair, he gulped nervously before stepping back to unlock the door. His heart was still beating wildly in his chest and he breathed in deeply through his nose before turning the door handle. Swinging it open carefully, he peeked out in the hallway.

"Hello?" he asked, more tentatively than he would have liked. He sounded almost scared, and wasn't that a great first impression?

The man in front of him spun around on his heel, and Troye froze halfway into his hesitant smile. He - he wasn't actually that bad looking. Kind of hot, in fact.

Deep blue eyes framed by stylish, dark-framed glasses and a confident smirk greeted his eyes. Troye trailed his gaze down to broad shoulders covered by a black blazer over a maroon shirt, but he didn't get any further before a deep chuckle broke his stare. Troye, blushing self-consciously, lifted his eyes quickly to meet a warm gaze, now sparkling with mirth.

"Troye?" the man asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Troye nodded his head dumbly, before shaking himself out of his daze and blinking.

"Uh, yeah, that's me," he answered, painfully aware of how monosyllable he sounded. "And you are?"

"Tyler." The blond man stretched his hand out towards Troye.

It seemed like a very formal gesture, considering, but Troye took the man's warm hand in his and gave it a shake, looking him in the eye. He immediately felt a bit more at ease from the gentle but firm answering squeeze of his hand.

"Nice to meet you," Troye said around a small smile, finding Tyler's friendly expression quite contagious.

"Pleasure's all mine, I'm sure," Tyler replied smoothly, his smirk deepening while he trailed his eyes down Troye's frame, not seeming to be bothered to hide the obvious scrutiny.

Troye felt his cheeks heat up even more and was just beginning to wonder when it would be a good time to release Tyler's hand from the slow shake they still had going, when Tyler lifted his eyes to meet his again.

"The slimmer one."

Troye blinked.

"What?" he asked.

"The slimmer one," Tyler repeated, nodding his head to Troye's lower left side.

Troye looked down in confusion, but when he lifted his hand and saw the ties still dangling from it, realization dawned on him. "Oh, you mean these," he said around a short chuckle as he lifted his hand higher and waved the ties around a bit.

Tyler raised an amused eyebrow at him and Troye cringed when he realized how stupid he'd already managed to make himself look in the first minutes of them meeting.

Troye slowly released Tyler's hand and reached up to rub his neck and continued, "Um, yeah I couldn't decide..."

Tyler's smirk turned into a softer smile. "Why don't you invite me in and I'll help you tie it?" he suggested, reaching out and sliding the narrower tie out of Troye's hand. The silky fabric slipped smoothly from Troye's fingers and he watched it fall into a pendulum movement where it now hung from Tyler's hand.

Clearing his throat, Troye nodded.

"Yeah! I mean, of course, come on in!" he offered as he once again looked up at Tyler's smiling face and motioned behind him with his arm in a sweeping motion, stepping out to open the door further.

Troye didn't know why he was so comfortable inviting a perfect stranger into his house without much compunction, but somehow Tyler gave off a calming sense of security, and since he didn't seem like an axe murderer right away, Troye thought he might as well give him a fair chance. Who knew, this might turn out better than the horrifying scenarios he's feared leading up to their meeting. After all, Tyler had a great start just by looking like something out of a men's wear ad.

Tyler accepted the invitation with a nod and stepped past Troye into the hallway beyond. As he walked by, a waft of his cologne reached Troye's nose and his eyelids fluttered for a second. 

He even smelled amazing.

Closing the door behind them, Troye followed the slightly shorter man into his apartment and stopped in the middle of the living room where Tyler turned to face him. The blond stepped forward and reached up to grab the other end of the tie behind Troye's neck and pulled it taught against the collar of his shirt, which he popped up with a few quick movements of his fingers.

"This model fits your frame better," Tyler explained as he confidently folded the tie over and in on itself in a double Windsor, "since the other one would cover more of your chest, effectively giving the impression that you're slimmer than you actually are," Tyler finished with a tug at the end of the tie, shimmying the knot up tighter against Troye's throat.

As if by reacting to the proximity of Tyler's hands, Troye swallowed noisily.

"Okay," Troye answered. "Thank you."

Tyler looked up from folding the collar back down and winked at him.

"You're welcome, gorgeous."

Troye paused at the unexpected compliment and cleared his throat. Tyler stepped back, his eyes still locked with Troye's, and Troye searched for something to say in the awkward silence that followed.

"So," he began hesitantly, "is this your first blind date?" Troye asked while following a step behind Tyler, who had turned to look around his living room. Troye watched as he eyed the record collection in the vertical stand by the window before turning to look at Troye over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow.

"Not really," he said in a way that made his words sound almost like a question. "I've been on quite a few dates, you know," Tyler trailed off before turning back to scrutinizing Troye's apartment.

Troye frowned slightly. No, he didn't know. Was Tyler saying that blind dates were somehow a regular occurrence around here?

"Really?" he asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

Tyler stuffed his hands in his pockets and shrugged, moving on to look at Troye's small collection of figurines depicting The Laughing Buddha.

"Yeah, this isn't exactly my first time with a new man for the night," he replied casually, leaning forward to inspect the tiny statues in greater detail.

Choking slightly on Tyler's oddly forward words, Troye stopped in his tracks and began to wonder just what Caspar had cooked up this time.

Tyler seemed like a nice guy, but there was something... peculiar... about his confident mannerism which unsettled Troye a bit. Not to mention the strange answer he just gave him. What exactly was Tyler hinting at?

Taking a deep breath, Troye decided he needed to clear things up before they left for the night, mostly to avoid potentially awkward moments later on. Having to send Tyler on his way when they'd already arrived at the benefit would just look suspicious and he might as well save himself the effort by eliminating the risk before they left.

"Wait, Caspar told you that you're accompanying me to a company event, right?" Troye paused as he watched Tyler turn around to face him with another smile. "We're not going on an actual date," he added almost as an afterthought.

With the smile remaining on his lips, Tyler tilted his head slightly to one side and looked at Troye with an amused frown on his face. "Yes, he did," he answered slowly, his tone patient but his eyes laughing.

Troye blushed as he realized how rude he must have sounded and, hoping that he hadn't managed to offend Tyler already.

He was just about to apologize when Tyler continued with a casual wave of his hand, "Oh, and if you're worried about the fee, it's been taken care of."

A wave of coldness washed over Troye, his eyes widening.

"F-fee?" he stuttered, wondering if his fears might be valid after all.

Tyler chuckled, as if amused by a private joke.

"Yeah, your friend is quite the generous guy. You should really buy him a steak dinner and tickets to the game or something in thanks."

Tyler winked at him, but Troye was still struggling to understand what he was talking about, so he repeated the question.

"Again," he said imploringly. "Fee?"

"Yes, the fee. He paid us - the agency I mean - enough to cover the entire night and then some, so I'm basically yours until lunch time tomorrow. If you'll have me, that is?"

The amused smile on Tyler's lips turned leering for a moment while he took a step forward, once more closing the distance between them.

Troye instinctively took a step back and Tyler's smirk faltered just a fraction. Troye didn't notice, however, his thoughts spinning out of control.

"Y-you're telling me Caspar has hired you from an- an agency to be my date for the night?!" he asked incredulously, not bothering to keep his voice down.

He knew it. He fucking knew it. Caspar was a dead man.

"Of course! I'm not 'self-employed', if that's what you want to call it," Tyler said while making quotation marks in the air before continuing in a much more diminished tone, looking at his feet, "I left the streets many, many years ago." Tyler shuddered minutely as if recalling something unpleasant.

Troye's eyes widened as it slowly dawned on him what Tyler was actually saying. It all suddenly began to make sense; Tyler's confident persona, his relaxed demeanor, his suggestive words, the smirk. Troye gulped and opened his mouth slightly, searching for the right way to voice his concerns.

"I'm sorry, but I have to ask; just what kind of... services does your agency provide exactly?"

Tyler lifted his head quickly and met Troye's eyes with a frown. "Wait, your friend didn't tell you?"

Troye shook his head violently, dreading Tyler's answer as he watched the now familiar smirk creep its way back onto his features.

"Okay. Then I'll word it in a way as to not ruin those pretty, innocent ears of yours," Tyler began slowly. "The agency I work for prides itself in providing excellent company for the lonely, be it only for one night. And if that companionship at some point happens to turn..." he paused, "... _carnal_ in nature, we do offer that service as well," Tyler finished smoothly.

It took a few moments for his words to sink in as Troye blinked at him, but when they did, he released the breath he’d been holding and felt himself blush all the way up to the roots of his hair. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"So, you- you're a prostitute?" he stammered, his heart racing at the implications.

Tyler wrinkled his nose and made a grunting noise indicating his displeasure at being called such.

"Escort, please," he answered, tone urging, and Troye gasped as Tyler confirmed the worst. "'Prostitute' is the very last thing I am. I am a dream date, a temporary love interest, a fling, a secret lover, a fuck buddy..." he trailed off as he stepped closer.

Troye was too mesmerized by Tyler's little speech to react to his proximity, or to realize that his mouth had fallen open slightly.

Stopping when there was only a foot or so left between them, Tyler sucked his bottom lip in between his teeth as his eyes flickered down to Troye's mouth. "I can assure you I am one of the very best temporary companions that my agency supplies. Your friend was in fact very lucky, calling upon my services just when I'd received a late cancelation."

He reached up and closed Troye's mouth by pressing his hooked index finger under his chin. Troye's breath hitched, and Tyler quickly lifted his eyes to lock them with his in an intense stare, breathing out his next words.

"So, whichever role you want me to play for you tonight, I am positive I can cater to your every need."

-


	2. Chapter 2

-

Tyler was still looking at him with that sultry stare, but had removed his finger from Troye’s chin and put his hand back in his pocket. There was a heavy silence following Tyler’s vivid description and Troye could feel his heart thumping against his ribcage.

He was going to strangle Caspar. Slowly. With his own intestines.

Caspar couldn’t do anything like a normal person, could he? He just had to go and hire Troye a fucking prostitute to be his date. Oh no, sorry. _Escort_.

Troye would have rolled his eyes, had he not been seething with anger with his supposed friend. Or paralyzed with shock over what Tyler had just told him.

Tyler eventually broke their stare by glancing at the clock on the wall behind Troye’s head and cleared his throat before focusing back on Troye. “So, what do you say? Will we be sharing a cab out of here, or are we going in different directions?”

Troye, however, was not quite ready to answer that yet, still preoccupied with thoughts of murdering a certain friend as he was, so he took a deep breath and held up a finger.

“Would... Would you excuse me for one second?” Troye’s voice was a bit strained since he was trying to reign in his anger in front of Tyler. “I just need to make a quick phone call. I’ll be right back!”

Tyler’s smile dimmed just a fraction before he gave a short nod. “Of course!”

Nodding back, Troye waggled his finger a bit as he turned and walked briskly towards his small kitchen, pulling out his phone and aggressively punching in his lock code on the way. He scrolled through his contacts and, once he found the name he was looking for, Troye tapped the call option and pulled the phone to his ear. His cheeks puffed out on an impatient huff when he reached the kitchen and leaned back against the counter, impatiently tapping it with the fingers of the hand resting by his side.

“Pick up, pick up, pick up...” he muttered through clenched teeth.

The call connected and a lazy “Hullo?” greeted him.

“What have you done, you fucking idiot?” Troye whispered harshly in response while straightening up and leaning away from the counter.

Caspar chuckled. “What do you mean?”

“You complete and utter arsewipe; you know exactly what I mean!” Troye continued, careful not to raise his voice as he paced around the small space in between the stove and the sink. “Why is there a fucking hooker in my living room right now?!”

“Troye, he’s an escort,” Caspar pointed out.

Troye lifted his hand to rub at his forehead as he closed his eyes and groaned. “Not you too...”

“Hey! I’ve hired him to be your date for the night because it’s basically a guaranteed way to get you some action at the end of all this. You need to get laid, Troye. You’re turning bitter.”

“No, I’m not!” Troye scoffed. “And I am not about to sleep with a ho- _escort_ just to prove you wrong. Besides, it’s illegal! I could get arrested!” he hissed.

Suddenly remembering that he’d left a complete stranger with a questionable career alone to roam his apartment, Troye pushed off the counter and went to stand by the open doorway between the kitchen and the living room. He felt a strange tug in his chest when he saw Tyler had found his Pokémon cards, and was eagerly flipping through the folder with a wide smile on his face.

Blinking in surprise, Troye was momentarily distracted by the almost childlike happiness on Tyler’s face before Caspar’s voice pulled him back to the present.

“No, you could not, because _you_ haven’t done anything wrong. You’ve been set up on a blind date, nothing more, nothing less. And yes, you are turning into a bitter, old, shrivelled up crank, and I will not stand idly by and watch it happen.”

“Oh my god,” Troye murmured as he looked heavenward for inner strength.

“Look, all I’m asking is that you give this guy a chance,” Caspar implored. “Don’t focus on what he is; just relax and try to have a good time tonight! You are supposed to have fun with this no-strings-attached deal, to let loose a little! That’s the point.” Caspar’s voice rose in exasperation. “Now get your arse in gear or you’ll be late for the opening speech!”

Troye shook his head. Once again, he was letting himself be persuaded by Caspar, but this time, it wasn’t entirely his friend’s urging words that had him reconsidering. The man looking at his card collection, dressed to the nines, may come off as confidence and seduction personified. But standing in Troye’s living room, lifting the cards closer to his face to squint at the text, was also a person shining through a facade that was probably honed over years in the sex trade business.

“Alright, alright,” Troye sighed in defeat. “See you there.”

Hanging up the call, Troye continued watching Tyler silently for a few more moments before stepping out of the doorway.

“You ready to go?” he asked as he pocketed his phone.

Tyler looked up at him, still smiling, and nodded. “Whenever you are, gorgeous!” he beamed. “And this collection of yours is awesome!” Tyler lifted the folder in his hands to indicate the cards.

“Um, thank you,” Troye said as he averted his eyes to reach for his wallet on the small table where he kept his keys. He hesitated before adding, “And please; don’t call me that.”

A chuckle made him lift his eyes back to find Tyler putting the cards back in the bookshelf before turning around and walking up to stand beside Troye.

“But you are. I can’t help it.” Tyler’s smile softened as he kept their gazes locked.

Troye could feel himself blushing again. He shook his head, breaking the stare, and tried to fight off the annoyingly delighted smile tugging on his lips.

“The cab I ordered earlier should be waiting outside by now. Let’s go.”

Troye turned, grabbing his suit jacket from the coat hanger in the hallway as he walked up to the door, opening it and looking back at Tyler expectantly.

Tyler let out a loud bark of laughter at Troye’s way of ignoring the compliment and shook his head in amusement as he sauntered past him.

Taking a deep steadying breath, Troye closed and locked the door firmly behind them.

This was going to be a long night.

-x-

The cab ride to the benefit was a surprisingly comfortable one. Tyler seemed to let his persona drop a bit when he asked Troye about his Pokémon cards, and they fell into an easy conversation about their favorite characters and mutual love for the franchise.

They were in the middle of a discussion about which was the better Pokémon when the driver slowed the car to a stop. As Troye took off his seat belt, he was surprised to find Tyler already handing a wad of bills to the driver and getting out of the car. He frowned questioningly as he craned his neck to watch Tyler speedily jog around the back of the car. The door beside him popped open and Tyler stood aside to let him out.

Troye paused for a moment, biting his lip, before accepting the awfully date-like gestures of Tyler paying the cab fair and opening his car door for him. He stepped out onto the red carpet leading up the stairs in front of them and glanced upwards.

At the top the French doors of the ballroom venue stood open, laughter and clinking noises of a party in session reaching them.

“I could have paid for that, you know,” Troye said, looking at Tyler.

Tyler shrugged, tilting his head as he stuffed his hands back into his pockets; something he seemed to be doing a lot. “I know, but I wanted to,” he said, winking. “I’m supposed to be your date, right? Might as well act the part.”

“Of course. Um, act like a date.” Troye hesitantly smiled back. “Because we don’t want them to know you’re a hired escort. I would never live it down,” he added before turning and beginning to walk up the stairs.

Tyler fell into step beside him and Troye looked over at him when he heard him snigger under his breath.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be a perfect gentleman and I promise to behave,” he said as his eyes fell to Troye’s mouth, and Troye felt his tongue dart out to lick his dry lips before he could stop it. “If you promise to keep that tongue in check. It makes me want to do wicked things to you right here in the bushes.”

Troye was beginning to think that scarlet was a skin tone he was going to have to get used to, judging by the amount of blushing he was doing. He had never been this easily affected by someone before. Words didn’t usually get to him. He’d been forced to listen to much more graphic things being blurted from Caspar’s mouth, like when he’d decided that Troye simply had to hear details about how one of the girls he was seeing had piercings in places that God never intended us to decorate with jewellery. The mental images alone had left Troye resolutely not speaking to Caspar for two days.

But somehow, Tyler’s suggestive flirting had him continuously flushing like a virgin bride on her wedding night. And wasn’t _that_ a fine analogy to make in this situation.

Troye rolled his eyes, both in response to Tyler and at his own reactions. Speeding up his steps, he quickly reached the open doors. He heard Tyler’s laughter ring out behind him, followed by the rhythmic tapping of his feet against the carpeted stairs.

A steady hand on the small of his back had Troye smiling secretly to himself as he was gently guided further inside a marble entrance hall softly lit by crystal chandeliers. The men and women milling around the space were dressed in their best evening wear, talking and laughing, while servers dressed in white jackets gracefully navigated the crowds, carrying trays laden with canapés and champagne flutes.

“Wow, this is posh, don’t you think?” Troye asked as he scanned the room and turned his head to look at Tyler, who had raised his hand to beckon one of the servers over. The girl, who had her dark brown hair tied up in a tight bun, greeted them with a smile as she extended the drinks toward them.

Tyler plucked two of the delicate flutes off the tray, nodding at the girl in thanks, and handed one to Troye while the server disappeared into the crowds once more.

“It certainly is,” Tyler smiled before lifting his drink and inclining his head toward Troye. “To posh parties!”

Troye smiled back politely as they clinked their glasses together carefully.

Just when he tipped the sparkly drink into his mouth, Tyler leaned closer to his ear and whispered, “And to your ass in those tailored pants.”

Gasping around the sip he’d just been swallowing, Troye sputtered and coughed as the champagne burned his windpipe. Wheezing a bit as he caught his breath, Troye stared at the glass in his hand, not knowing where else to look.

“Careful,” Tyler admonished around a laugh as he gently tapped Troye’s upper back before letting his voice drop again, “or I might be tempted to suggest something else you could choke on.”

Troye’s eyes widened in disbelief and he whipped his head around to stare incredulously at Tyler. The blond man was smirking at him again and Troye considered asking him if these not-so-subtle sexual innuendos were something he was going to be forced to endure the entire night. But Troye didn’t have time to form a response before he heard someone call his name.

“Troye, there you are! Glad to see you could make it!”

Troye would recognize that voice anywhere, so he wasn’t surprised to see Caspar beaming at him when he finally turned to look at the man standing in front of them, a blonde dressed in a slick lavender number on his arm.

Troye wasn’t smiling back, however, but more glaring at his “friend”. He’d decided to use the term very loosely from this day forward.

“And I see you’ve brought a date!” Caspar continued as he turned to smile at Tyler, feigning innocence. “Hi, you must be Tyler. I’ve heard a lot about you!”

“Well, you would’ve...” Troye muttered under his breath as Caspar extended his hand for Tyler to shake.

Tyler shifted his glass to hold with his left hand as he took hold of Caspar’s with his right. “That’s right! And you must be Caspar,” he smiled back. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

Troye shifted on his feet, not sure he liked the way their exchange made it sound as if Tyler and he had known each other for longer than an hour. Even if they were supposed to make this agreement look like a real date, there was no need to keep up appearances in front of Caspar.

“To be honest, I’m happy to see Troye here decided to come out of hiding and start seeing people again. Lord knows he needs it!” Caspar sniggered while winking at Troye.

Troye rolled his eyes. “Oh, just stop it, would you?”

Tyler chuckled and turned to look at Troye, ignoring his protest. “Well, then I’m honored he deemed me worthy of being the one who gets to take him out.”

Starting to get fed up with being talked about as if he wasn’t there, Troye readied himself to say as much, only to freeze when Tyler reached up to cup the side of his face. He was leaning in, and before Troye could protest, Tyler had closed his eyes and pecked the corner of his mouth gently.

The hand holding him in place kept Troye from jerking away from the touch, but that didn’t mean he didn’t try.

He wasn’t ready for kissing. He’d never agreed on there being any kissing.

Troye felt his face flush with anger this time – anger at Tyler for taking that sort of liberty. When Tyler leaned back to smile at him with those twinkling blue eyes, Troye shook his head and fixed him with a stern look.

“Don’t ever try to kiss me again,” he said slowly.

The smile died on Tyler’s lips as his eyes flickered over Troye’s face, frowning as he took in his dark expression. After seeming to realize that Troye meant business, Tyler nodded while he let his hand drop back to hang by his side.

“Okay. No kissing. Got it,” Tyler replied, his flirty persona vanishing along with his clipped words. He turned back to Caspar, whose eyes shifted curiously between them, having caught the exchange.

“So, you’re not from around here, are you?” Tyler asked with a polite smile on his lips, addressing the South African.

Caspar laughed, “What gave it away? Surely not the way I speak?”

And with that, Tyler and Caspar fell into an easy conversation, exchanging questions and stories revolving around how Caspar had found his way to L.A. The blonde girl excused herself to the ladies room, which left Troye to stand idly by as his friend and his... escort bonded.

He was quickly lost in his own thoughts, though, tuning out their voices as he sipped his drink and absentmindedly scanned the crowds once more. Troye wasn’t feeling guilty in the least about telling Tyler off like he had. While he could live with the outrageous flirting to a certain degree, he had to draw the line somewhere. Kissing seemed too personal of a thing to be doing with someone whose profession was to have sex with anyone who paid well enough.

After the Debacle of David (a term he’d come up with not long after it happened), Troye had come to the conclusion that he would rather save that sort of intimacy for when it actually meant something. And it would – could – never mean anything with someone like Tyler. He quite literally sold his body for a living and, as a consequence, intimacy was out of the picture before it could even be in it.

So then why had Troye felt an uncomfortable squeeze in his gut when Tyler had turned away from him, all mirth lost from his face? Had Troye really offended him that badly? Tyler was just there to pretend to be his date. At least that’s what they’d agreed on. And while Troye hadn’t told him up front that there wouldn’t be any sexual activities rounding up this evening, Tyler’s ego could surely take the hit of Troye not wanting to take him up on the offer.

Couldn’t it?

“As a matter of fact, Troye here is South African born himself!”

Troye was jolted out of his thoughts at the mention of his name, and he looked back at Caspar, a bit confused as to what they’d been talking about since he hadn’t been listening. Blondie had managed to find her way back to them without him noticing too, not that she’d said a word so far anyway, seeming more interested in looking good than actually speaking.

“What?” he asked dumbly.

“I was telling Tyler that you’re from South Africa too,” Caspar replied, and Troye saw out of the corner of his eye how Tyler turned to look at him in surprise.

“Really?” Tyler asked. “But you don’t speak like Caspar?”

Troye glanced at Tyler, glad to see his relaxed, open expression back in place.

“That’s because he grew up in Australia,” Caspar explained.

“Oh,” Tyler smirked, “so that’s where the hot accent comes from.” Tyler wiggled his eyebrows.

Relieved as he was that Tyler seemed to be back to his normal self, Troye couldn’t stop the shy smile he felt tugging at his lips.

“Come on, we better go find our seats,” he said, aiming to hide his face as he began walking toward the grand ball room on their right.

Caspar and Tyler chuckled as they followed him, but just as they reached the archway, Troye stopped suddenly and turned to Caspar, something dawning on him.

“Wait. There is a seat for Tyler, right?”

Caspar reached up and clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. I convinced Grace to add a plus one to your name before we left work yesterday. She wasn’t happy about it at first, but she knows she can’t resist this smooth talker,” Caspar sniffed as he pulled on his jacket cuffs, brushing off imaginary lint.

Troye breathed a sigh of relief before feeling a hand at the small of his back again. He stiffened a bit as Tyler leaned closer, now knowing the type of thing to expect when this happened.

“Aw, that’s very sweet of you to think of me like that,” Tyler crooned.

Troye growled. “Shut up.”

Tyler laughed loudly and followed him as Troye turned and stomped away to go search for their names on the seating cards again, a sniggering Caspar and his girl trailing behind.

Eventually they found all of their names placed around one of the circular tables and sat down just in time to get introduced to the two middle-aged couples already occupying it before the opening speech began, held by the CEO. A silent auction was announced, and after the answering applause had died down when the CEO stepped down from the stage, dinner was served. There was a bit of a lull in the conversation around their table as they dug into the delicious appetizer, occasionally exchanging polite agreements on the quality of the food.

“So tell me, Troye, have you and Tyler been together long?” one of the ladies at their table – Marcia – asked, addressing Troye with an inquisitive smile.

Her husband Steven nudged her with his elbow, whispering her name admonishingly under his breath.

“What?” she turned to him with an amused frown, “They’re a cute couple! You know I’m a sucker for young love!”

Troye’s eyes widened at the mention of the L word before snapping them to look at Caspar when he heard his friend snort loudly.

“Yeah, how long have you two lovebirds been together, Troye?” Caspar chuckled, fluttering his eyelashes at Troye and smiling like the cat that caught the canary.

Troye narrowed his eyes, hoping that his glare conveyed how fine of a line his friend was treading, and when Caspar just winked at him in response, Troye was tempted to flash him a well-turned middle finger. Marcia was, however, patiently expecting an answer, so instead he turned back to her, trying to think of a plausible story for how Tyler and he knew each other.

“Well, we... As a matter of fact, we aren’t-”

“We met quite recently, actually.”

Troye turned his head quickly to stare at Tyler, who smiled warmly at Marcia, wondering what he was up to and silently begging him to watch his words. He jumped slightly when he felt Tyler’s hand cover his as it lay on the white table cloth between their plates. He looked down at their hands but lifted his eyes back to meet Tyler’s when he turned to look at Troye.

The smile on Tyler’s lips softened as he added, “But I haven’t been able to let this vision out of my sight since.”

Marcia made a cooing sound before nudging her husband in retaliation. “See, Steven? They’re so sweet! Oh, I remember when you used to look at me like that!”

“What do you mean? I still do!” Steven scoffed indignantly. They fell into a light hearted bickering match, the kind that long time married couples had, soon turning to the others to tell the story of how they met.

Troye was still focused on Tyler, however, grateful that he’d kept his answer short and vague. He’d managed to tell the truth by not saying too much, instead of making up some elaborate story that they’d have to keep track of as the night wore on. Only thing was he hadn’t denied Marcia’s assumption that they were a couple.

Troye felt his face flush again as he felt Tyler’s hand tighten minutely around his, but he didn’t break their gaze as he was lost to his own thoughts once more.

Sure, Tyler was charming, good looking, and had undeniable sex appeal, and Troye was finding it increasingly more difficult not to take his compliments to heart. The only problem was that with someone like Tyler, you would never know if he actually meant what he was saying, or if it was all just an elaborate sales-pitch.

But while letting himself be drawn in by the sparkling blue’s, Troye could physically feel some of his resistance crumble as he began to wonder if the sincerity of Tyler’s words really mattered all that much.

-


	3. Chapter 3

-

The hand under Tyler’s palm was warm. He could feel the whisper of a heartbeat through the soft skin as he squeezed it in what he hoped was a reassuring manner, letting his smile soften to increase the effect.

He hadn’t been lying when he used the word ‘vision’ to describe Troye. The man sitting by his side was gorgeous; his face delicate yet strong, the sharp jawline and high cheekbones framing full, pink lips, and the bluest eyes Tyler had ever seen. He’d learned quickly that he enjoyed having Troye’s full attention, especially when it meant he could stare into those eyes unhindered, like he was doing now.

But where Troye’s looks were the stuff of poetry, his personality was reserved – cautious to not let his guard down. Of course, it was not that surprising seeing as it seemed like Troye hadn’t been prepared to have someone from Tyler’s line of work as his date.

When elaborating to clue Troye in on his role as an escort, Tyler had automatically launched into the little speech he’d held countless of times before to convince a potential client to buy the additional services that the agency couldn’t advertise for legal reasons. The words had fallen effortlessly from his mouth, an air of confidence accompanying them like second nature. Pocketing extra cash from performing sexual services was usually something he aimed to do, provided that the guy he was with wasn’t a total creep. Tyler had met his fair share of those and, learning the hard way, he could now spot them from a mile away which gave him ample opportunity to dodge their attempts at further negotiations when the pre-agreed assignation was over. Of course, when Tyler had contacted Caspar after receiving the booking, they’d agreed for Tyler to spend the night and additional fees had been settled. What Caspar had failed to mention however, was Troye’s lack of involvement in the scheduling of their appointment.

A plate suddenly invaded Tyler’s line of sight, abruptly breaking his thoughts. He blinked, momentarily confused before he realized he’d been staring at the boy beside him for what was probably an awkwardly long time and that the entre was now being served. Tyler shifted his gaze to where he felt the hand underneath his pull away and when he looked back at Troye he found him fiddling with the napkin in his lap, another faint blush dusted over his cheeks. Troye cleared his throat discreetly and lifted his eyes to the food that had been placed in front of him, effectively ending their little moment by grabbing his cutlery and cutting into the tender veal.

Tyler felt his smile widen at how, quite frankly, adorable his “date” was. He grabbed his glass of deep red wine, sipping it while turning back to his own plate as well as his thoughts, once more drowning out the conversations around him.

Certainly, Troye’s stunned reaction earlier was quite understandable. Tyler was used to it. His occupation was, after all, one that carried a heavy stamp of taboo. But watching as realization dawned on Troye’s face, and seeing his tentative attitude toward him instantly change to caution, Tyler couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed.

The tangibly nervous Troye that had hesitatingly opened his door for Tyler was now mostly hidden underneath exasperated eye-rolls and dismissive comments; even if the blush that kept appearing on his face told Tyler that he was still in there somewhere. It was those unintentional, bodily reactions to Tyler’s insinuating remarks that posed too tempting of a challenge not to accept. They intrigued him, making him fully intent on inspiring a blush as often as possible, despite Troye’s protests. They also made him look forward to maybe – hopefully – making the boy flush for very different reasons later on. Tyler smiled secretly as he carefully speared one of the delicate miniature potatoes on his plate with the fork. All he had to do was to lay on the charm and hope that Troye would allow him the chance before they had to part ways.

He would have to be careful, though. Troye was trouble. Tyler could feel it in the amount of energy he was putting into having the boy surrender to his suggestive hints. There was no way of knowing how their night would transpire, or where it might lead, but Tyler would very much regret it if he didn’t at least put in a good try to have Troye moaning his name. Or get to kiss him properly before the night was over. He would have to worry later about why he felt that way.

-x-

The sounds of swingy jazz filled the air as a band played and some of the guests had paired off to sway together on the dance floor set up on one side of the grand ballroom. Occasionally sipping their wine, Tyler and Troye strolled from one display table to the next at a leisurely pace, viewing the prizes up for auction.

The rest of the dinner sitting had been filled with an easy flow of conversation between Tyler and the rest of the guests at their table. But Troye had remained a bit subdued, only answering direct questions and never adding anything when he didn’t have to. Tyler however, had felt right at home since being a social chameleon came with his work description.

Keeping up a conversation with someone who wouldn’t really initiate any topics on their own was difficult even for Tyler though, and it left a silence enveloping the two of them now that they were alone. But it wasn’t an uncomfortable one. They were still exchanging a few words every once in a while to comment on the items on offer.

The small smile on Tyler’s lips never dimmed as he kept catching Troye glancing at him out of the corner of his eye, probably thinking that Tyler didn’t notice. He knew Troye was itching to know more about him, especially the whole escort thing, and it was quite amusing to watch him trying to gather the courage to begin the, no-doubt awkward for him, conversation. Tyler could practically see the wheels turning in Troye’s head.

Once they’d finished looking at the display of more valuable items Tyler nodded towards the bar, silently asking Troye if he wanted a refill. Troye nodded and followed Tyler as he stepped in between two of the groups of guests chattering amicably by the high-countered bar. Troye finished the last of his white wine before reaching for another, while Tyler helped himself to another glass of red.

“Alright, just go ahead and ask me already,” Tyler said, deciding to end the silence, and peered at Troye, who looked back at him in confusion.

Swallowing the sip he’d taken from his glass, Troye answered with a question of his own. “Ask you what?”

Tyler couldn’t help but let his eyes follow the fleeting glimpse of Troye’s tongue as it peeked out from between his lips to collect the wine residue gathered there. “About what I do for a living,” he said, lifting his eyes back to Troye’s, making sure his smile was gentle.

Troye cleared his throat and glanced around the room distractedly before turning back to look at his own feet. “Caspar told me to not focus on what you are, so that’s what I’m trying to do.”

Tyler chuckled and shook his head. “That’s very polite of you, but I really don’t mind.” He waited for Troye to meet his gaze again before continuing, “Go on, ask me. I know you want to.”

Seeming to think about it for a few moments, Troye eventually nodded. “Okay. Let’s just take this somewhere a bit more private first,” he said, looking pointedly at the bustle of people surrounding them.

Tyler couldn’t resist the smirk he felt tugging on his lips and answered, “I like the sound of that, gorgeous.” He was pleasantly surprised to find Troye ignoring his comment in favor of scanning the room quickly to find them a quiet corner. He didn’t tell him off. Progress.

Troye led them towards a spot along the stretch of wall to the side, where the lights were slightly more dimmed and Tyler fixed him with an expectant look as he turned around to face him. Troye reached up and rubbed his neck, as if considering how to begin.

“Okay. So, um… How long have you been doing this for?”

Tyler leaned his shoulder against the wall casually, slipping his free hand into his pocket. “Eight years, give or take,” he answered with a shrug, watching as Troye’s eyebrows shot upwards.

“Eight years?!” Troye questioned, his voice slightly aghast. “Wait, how old are you?”

Tyler sniggered at Troye’s reaction. “I just turned twenty-eight.”

Troye frowned. “So you were just twenty when you started? That’s a long time…” he trailed off. “Are you going to be doing this for the rest of your life?”

“I was seventeen actually. And no, I didn’t plan to but I’ve tried other things for shorter periods of time, ‘in between jobs’, so to speak. None of them ever work out though, so I’m comfortable for the time being.”

The frown on Troye’s face deepened a fraction and he peered curiously at Tyler. “But how did you end up like this? This couldn’t have been what you dreamed of doing when you were a kid.”

The question caught Tyler off guard a bit, and he bent his head to stare at his glass.

“Wow,” he chuckled, although he knew his laugh came off as anything but amused as he looked down at the wine in his hand. Swirling the burgundy liquid distractedly, he continued, “Going for the hard hitting questions quickly, I see!”

He stayed focused on his glass while trying to think of how to word his answer. Tyler usually didn’t let anyone in on the details of his past, but he was willing to share just a smidgeon of it with Troye. It felt almost like he deserved as much, even if Tyler didn’t know why that was.

“You don’t have to tell me,” Troye spoke softly from his side.

Tyler shook his head and shifted a bit, lifting his gaze to the laughing people dancing a bit further off to their right. His eyes followed a younger couple who were gently swaying to the music, watching as they cuddled close, a look of contentment and joy on their features.

“My dad walked in on me and a friend from school while we were fooling around in my room. All hell broke loose and I ran away from home. Money had to come from somewhere, so turning tricks was a survival strategy back then. It was either that, or drugs.”

Tyler finally turned his head back to look at Troye, who was watching him with an expression of sympathy, his brow furrowed. Tyler smiled to try and ease the somber atmosphere that had quickly fallen over them. “Somewhere along the road, it became a way of life. It was ages ago though, and I’ve come a long way since then.”

The frown on Troye’s face didn’t disappear, however. It only deepened as he looked almost doubtful that Tyler was really as alright as he claimed. Tyler sighed and wanting to make sure Troye understood that he wasn’t doing anything he didn’t want to he turned his expression slightly more serious, and fixed the other man with a placating look.

“Look. Sex is what I know. Sex is what I’m good at. There’s… security – power – in knowing that, and in knowing that I have enough experience to not let any of this affect me. It might sound cold hearted to you, but I’ve been doing this for so long that I have no issues with it being purely business, albeit of the more unconventional sort. Believe it or not, I enjoy doing what I do.”

Tyler sipped his wine still keeping his eyes locked on Troye, who seemed to process his words for a second before breaking their gaze and nodding, and raise his own glass to his lips. Tyler waited silently for Troye to gather his thoughts, watching as his frown eased a bit.

“What kind of people do you usually… um… meet, then?” Troye asked hesitantly and Tyler was grateful that he seemed to want to shift the topic as much as he did. Even though Tyler realized that he had opened up the possibility of Troye asking him anything, talking about the deeper, truer aspects of things irked him. He’d rather not think about it right now; not when he was actually enjoying himself. So, smiling confidently Tyler settled back against the wall and crossed his ankles in a relaxed posture.

“Mostly older men looking for some company to ease their loneliness for a moment,” he stated matter-of-factly, looking over at Troye again. “It’s actually been a while since I’ve been set up with someone younger than myself.” Tyler couldn’t help but wink at Troye and he wasn’t disappointed when a faint blush bloomed on the boy’s high cheekbones.

“I’ve also been known to dabble in the heterosexual spectrum of things a few times,” he continued, “but that doesn’t happen very often. My preferences are clearly advertised as towards men.” He once more letting his eyes wander over the crowds, thinking for a moment. “Then, there’s the odd sexually confused guy, about to settle down for a life with a wife and kids, wanting to see if the boners they popped in the showers after football practice in high school were just due to a phase or not. Some of them are already married. But their infidelity isn’t for me to judge. I’m just there to give them what they pay me for – a good time,” Tyler smirked.

He was just about to look back at Troye to gauge his reaction when his eyes settled on a face further towards the middle of the room, his line of vision breaking every now and then when other guests unwittingly passed through it. But there was no doubting the familiar features that Tyler was now looking at. He couldn’t help but giggle at the irony. It was almost as if his words had magically conjured the man – Sebastian Pritchard – from thin air and he lifted his hand in the direction he was looking, pointing him out to Troye.

“Speaking of which, there’s one of them now,” he chuckled. Tyler kept his eyes firmly set on the man while out of the corner of his eye he saw Troye frown and turn to follow his gaze.

The man was dressed in a stylish grey suit, a nicely trimmed beard covering his jawline and upper lip, and his hair was carefully jelled and swept back from his face. There was no denying that Sebastian was an attractive man, and he smiled along with the petite, yet highly pregnant girl on his arm as she chatted amicably with two older couples. The women were gushing over the girl's protruding belly, forming a small crowd around her.

Tyler heard Troye gasp at his side just as Sebastian clearly began loosing interest in the topic of conversation surrounding him and lifted a glass of what appeared to be whiskey to his mouth, looking up and scanning the room.

“You’re joking,” Troye said, his voice breathy with disbelief.

Tyler’s smirk widened as Sebastian’s gaze casually skimmed over the two of them, and he snorted out a laugh as he saw the other man do a double take, obviously recognizing Tyler as well.

“Oh, I am far from joking, babe,” Tyler drawled, watching the man’s eyes widen comically.

“But that’s Mr. Pritchard, the CEO’s nephew!” Troye whispered harshly to his side, too scandalized to notice the pet name Tyler had used. “He's set to take over the chair once the old man retires!”

“Be that as it may, but I never forget a face. Let’s just say Mr. Pritchard and I have closed a business deal or two before.” Tyler shrugged and watched in rapt fascination as Sebastian’s face went from a red that clashed terribly with his purple neck tie, to an almost greenish pale. Tyler raised his glass toward him in greeting, his smirk deepening as he winked.

“He can’t be gay,” Troye protested. “That’s his fiancée!”

Tyler snorted and rolled his eyes before glancing at Troye. “Please! With a name like Sebastian? He’s as gay as they come,” he said before leaning in closer to murmur conspiratorially, “you know, he always insisted on calling me ‘daddy’.”

Giggling again when Troye let out another gasp, Tyler turned back just in time to see Sebastian grip the arm of his fiancée and throw a polite, but strained, smile at the group that surrounded them, before steering her away and vanishing quickly in the throng of people.

“Shit,” Troye swore abruptly and Tyler swiveled his head around to see him gripping his forehead, staring at the floor in what looked like panic. “Shit! He saw me with you. I’m fucked!”

Tyler raised his eyebrows and murmured, “Not yet, you aren’t,” while ducking his head to have a sip of wine.

Troye didn’t seem to hear him though, since he continued to freak out, now covering his mouth with a hand, making his words come out slightly muffled as he fixed his wide eyes on Tyler.

“He knows who you are. He knows what you are, and now he’s seen me with you, and oh my god-”

Tyler rolled his eyes. “Calm down, will you?” he said, looking back at Troye. “Do you really think he’d risk exposing himself by letting on that he knows who I am? Relax. You’re fine.”

When Troye just kept shaking his head, Tyler reached up to delicately grip his wrist and pulled his hand away from his lips. “Stop worrying,” he urged gently, “even if he actually registered you standing there over his own panic, which I don’t think he did, he’s not going to say anything.”

Troye lifted a skeptical eyebrow at him, and Tyler released his hold his arm, nodding in an encouraging manner. Troye took a deep breath, dropping his shoulders when he exhaled slowly. Unsettled by the slightly dejected feeling that had settled in his chest at Troye’s rather violent reaction to the prospect of being seen with him, Tyler decided to try and lighten the mood again.

“You know, he was a total slut, anyway, practically begging me to fuck him the minute I stepped inside his door. As a matter of fact,” Tyler added as an afterthought, “this is the first ‘date’ I’ve been on in a long time where I don’t have to keep fending off incessant groping. Even if I wouldn’t mind some right now, it’s actually a nice change,” he laughed.

“This isn’t a date, Tyler,” Troye quickly pointed out, his repetition of the fact becoming predictable.

Tyler paused and fixed Troye with a firm stare. “I know that,” he answered calmly. “And god forbid you’d let either of us forget it.” He knew Troye didn’t mean it personally, but he still couldn’t help beginning to feel slightly irritated at the way the other man refused to leave his overanalyzing at the door.

“Are you seriously getting pissed at me for not allowing you to pretend that this is somehow real?” Troye said, his voice rising in volume and frowning at him.

“No.” Tyler answered, feeling his heart rate increase. “But what is starting to annoy me is the fact that you won’t let go of your ill-conceived prejudice for long enough to allow yourself relax. I won’t jump you, despite how much I’d like to.”

‘And damn, would I like to,’ Tyler added silently to himself. He was strangely pleased by the way Troye’s eyes widened at his suddenly brazen tone; Troye seemed like a genuinely good person, but he needed a wakeup call.

“No matter how we try to look at this, the playing field between you and I isn’t exactly even. Whether we like it or not, you’re the one calling the shots. If I had any say in this at all, it would be to ask you to forget about what you think you know about me and just enjoy yourself.”

“You sound like Caspar,” Troye drawled, obviously trying to seem bored and failing miserably with his face flushed in anger.

“He’s a smart man,” Tyler added casually.

Troye groaned in what sounded like exasperation. “Alright look. You can’t seriously expect me to be all fine and dandy with having to spend the night with a prostitute?”

“I told you earlier; it’s ‘esc-’,” Tyler tried, frowning when Troye interrupted him.

“‘Escort’, I know,” Troye finished monotonously. “The difference being?”

Tyler sighed heavily, shaking his head and fiddling a bit with his glass before he lifted his eyes back to look into Troye’s startling blue’s. “You know what? You’re right. I do have sex in exchange for money. But at least show me enough respect to consider the hypocrisy of judging me for what I do. I enjoy sex just as much as next guy and I’m doing exactly what everyone else is; only I’m getting paid for it. While the rest of you leave a trail of sobering regrets, broken hearts, and STD’s in your wake, plowing through meaningless one-night stands, my clients and I have no misconceptions about what we’re doing and I am completely in control of what I’m prepared to offer them. And believe it or not, they respect that. Are you telling me you’ve never gone home with someone from the bar, just for the night? That you’ve never wanted to just fuck and leave, no feelings involved?”

“No, but-” Troye began before Tyler interrupted him.

“Well, I’m a professional one-night stand.” Tyler shrugged, taking a sip of his drink and hoping that would be the end of it. “Anything else you want to know?”

“I’m not judging you,” Troye sighed, ignoring Tyler’s question.

“Of course you are, or you wouldn’t be so focused on the fact that I’m an escort.” He added a small smile of reassurance before continuing. “It’s okay, though. You’re not the first and probably won’t be the last to do it anyway. I can only hope to leave you with a different perspective. I’m not ashamed of what I do, but it doesn’t define me.”

Troye’s cheeks were flushed and he had opened his mouth to speak again when a somewhat nasal voice came from their side, interrupting him.

“Troye? Is everything okay here?”

Tyler just had time to register how Troye stiffened a fraction before both of their heads turned to locate the source of the question. His eyes were met by a fairly tall man with a narrow face and sloping shoulders, deeply set grey eyes and thick eyebrows. The unruly, dark mop of curls on his head looked like it could use a trimming, and if Tyler could use one word to describe the man, it would be ‘plain’.

Similar to his own scrutinizing look, the man was eyeing Tyler up and down, his nose scrunching up a bit as if he’d smelled something unpleasant.

“David! Hi!” Troye answered, his voice raising an octave, and Tyler almost cringed at the feigned amity in his tone. “Um, yes. Why wouldn’t it be okay?” he asked, his fake smile stretching.

David finally broke the staring match he’d held with Tyler, and turned to Troye, his expression softening quickly. Tyler just barely kept from rolling his eyes at the obvious infatuation in the man’s glittering eyes.

“I saw you from over there,” David pointed to somewhere over his shoulder, “and I thought you looked upset, I suppose. I wanted to make sure that this man wasn’t bothering you… Is he?”

Tyler was once again fixed with a steely glare. David was probably trying to come off as threatening, to which Tyler simply raised an unimpressed eyebrow. But before he could say anything on the matter, Troye let out a forced laugh and Tyler felt an arm snake around his shoulders. The unexpected touch gave him pause, but he quickly found himself again, smirking and letting one of his own arms wind around Troye’s waist.

“Oh, no! You’ve got it all backwards,” Troye gushed. “David, this is Tyler – my boyfriend.”

-


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _**Observe:** I want to make it absolutely clear that none of the characters in this chapter are intended to have had enough to drink to be considered drunk or unable to make lucid, rational decisions._
> 
> _This chapter contains **explicit sexual content**. Do not read on unless you are of legal age to do so._

-

As soon as the words left his mouth, Troye wished he could take them back; to just reach out and reel them back in, as if they were visible letter shaped bubbles hanging in the air between the three of them, and swallow them back down, leaving everyone oblivious to their previous existence. He knew he was flushing to the roots of his hair by the way his face was heating up but he made sure to keep smiling, even if his cheeks were beginning to hurt from the strain.

All Troye had wanted to do was get David to back off and finally leave him alone. What he hadn't meant to do was blurt something as infinitely stupid as saying that Tyler was his boyfriend. _Boyfriend_ , for fucks sake! Saying that he was his date would have sufficed!

But Troye had panicked and managed to back himself into a pretty little corner. He couldn't very well backtrack his way out of this one now. He had to keep up pretences and go along with the story, at least while David was around, if not the rest of the night. Tyler would probably have a field day.

Troye watched as David's mouth fell open to form an 'oh'. His eyes went from looking at the hand Troye was resting on Tyler's shoulder, to glancing at the finger's holding Troye's waist, flickering briefly over Tyler's face, and then back to Troye again. David's face morphed from an expression of surprise to one closer to indignation, as if Troye and Tyler touching each other somehow offended him.

"I- I didn't realize," David stuttered. "It looked like you were fighting."

A ripple of annoyance ran through Troye's body. He didn't need a knight in shining armor to come save him. He wasn't a dainty princess, and David sure as hell didn't have any right to make assumptions. But in the interest of keeping up appearances, Troye faked another laugh.

"Just a lover's spat, you know how it is." He lifted his hand and tried to make a dismissive gesture. It came out looking more like an 'aw shucks' elbow-hook so Troye quickly lifted his drink to his mouth to down the remaining wine in one gulp, arguing that more alcohol was exactly what he needed right now. Preferably enough to make him black out so he wouldn't have to deal with this situation. Though, since he didn't feel more than a faint buzz yet, Troye knew it was futile.

"Then I hope you guys work it out. I hate seeing nice couples like yourselves fall out over petty little things," David cooed in exaggerated sympathy even as he was glaring daggers at Tyler.

"I'm sure we'll be just fine... David, was it?" Tyler drawled and turned to look at Troye. "Won't we, babe?" His hand squeezed Troye's waist and Troye turned to smile at him in silent response. He was surprised to find his smile feeling less strained when focused on Tyler, whose eyes were back to their merry twinkling. Troye knew without a doubt that Tyler was just living for this new development in their little act. Figures.

David cleared his throat and Troye watched as Tyler rolled his eyes before turning to face David again.

"So, what else do you do, David, except sticking your nose in other people's business?" Tyler asked conversationally, the perfect picture of bored disinterest.

Troye snorted at Tyler's unexpected forwardness and coughed quickly to try to cover it up. He reached up to flick the ear conveniently situated right above his hand. "Tyler! Be nice," he admonished and turned to David, already opening his mouth to apologize.

"No no, that's alright! I can take a hint." David lifted his hands up in a shielding gesture and took a step back. "You know where to find me when you're ready for a real man," he winked at Troye. He turned back to Tyler, sneering as he gave him another once-over, and turned to saunter off looking like his shit didn't stink.

Watching his retreating back in stunned silence, Troye shook his head while Tyler piped up beside him.

"Who was that asshole?"

Troye groaned. "That was David," he sighed as he turned back to Tyler. "He's basically a stupid drunken mistake I made at another office party a while back and he's been all over me ever since. It's as if he refuses to believe that I am not interested."

Presumably looking at David, Tyler's eyes narrowed as he glared past Troye's shoulder. Troye felt the hand on his waist slip down to his hip and he stiffened a bit at the touch. His heart started racing when Tyler's eyes flashed darkly.

"Too bad for him that you're here with me, then," he muttered deeply while his hand tightened its grip.

So Tyler was the jealous type. Wonderful. Troye almost snorted. How's that for irony?

Still, there was no denying the tingling sensation that made the little hairs on the back of his neck rise at the possessiveness in Tyler's demeanor. Suddenly reminded of the fact that he still held Tyler by his shoulders, Troye quickly let his arm drop while reaching to gently pry away the hand on his hip.

"Maybe we should go and see if we can find Caspar?" he suggested, trying to change the topic. He didn't really want to lead Tyler on by letting him think that he enjoyed his touch when they didn't have to keep up pretences in favor of anyone watching.

Tyler's hand slipped away and Troye thought he heard him sigh softly. "Thanks for playing along, by the way." He paused. "And for the talk earlier. I'm sorry if I was being rude."

Tyler smiled back at him. "No problem. I hope you try to keep an open mind from now on."

"I will," Troye answered truthfully. "Promise."

-x-

After a bit of searching, they eventually found Caspar standing by the bar, ordering drinks. He turned to them with a big grin when Troye sidled up beside him.

"There you are! I was beginning to think Tyler had whisked you off to have his wicked way with you in the coat room or something," Caspar winked saucily and Tyler laughed at the blush Troye knew he was sporting.

"Not yet, anyway," Tyler chuckled.

"So where'd the little arm candy go, Caspar? No luck with this one, huh?" he challenged instead of dignifying either of the two with a response.

"Don't know; care less," Caspar shrugged. "She was way too boring anyway. You know I like 'em feisty." He elbowed Troye as if he was relaying an insider joke or something. Troye rolled his eyes.

"Would you stop being such a boy, Caspar. It's really distasteful."

"Only if you stop being a prude," he replied casually before turning to collect the small tumbler glass the barman set in front of him on the bar top. Ice cubes clinked inside an amber liquid as he lifted it. "Want to join me on the terrace? Joe brought a couple of nicely illegal Cubans and very generously offered to share. I'm sure there's one for you guys too if you want?"

"You know I don't smoke, Caspar," Troye answered at the same time as Tyler said, "Sure, we'd love to!"

Troye turned to give Tyler a questioning look and received a shrug in reply.

"What? I like a good cigar every now and then. They smell nice," Tyler smiled in explanation. "Besides, you don't decline when offered a Cuban." He lifted his hand to wave at the bartender and when he got his attention he pointed at Caspar's glass, indicating he wanted one too.

Troye silently considered his options. While he was beginning to relax enough to enjoy Tyler's company, he wasn't sure he was ready for Tyler to suggest they take to the dance floor or something equally ridiculous, which Troye wouldn't put past him at all. At least they wouldn't have to pretend to be together if they joined Caspar outside.

"Okay, but I'll blame you when I turn green and have to be sick in the bushes," he warned, only half-joking.

"I'll make sure to hold your hair back," Tyler chuckled and picked up his bourbon while handing Troye his third glass of wine before turning to Caspar. "Shall we?"

-x-

The night had turned chilly, or perhaps it was due to them leaving the warmth of the ballroom, but Troye still shivered as they stepped out on the big terrace running the length of the back of the building. While the area was softly lit by evenly spaced out sconces lining the wall, the small garden past the stone railing was shrouded in a slight darkness, sparsely lit here and there by a few well placed ground lights to highlight some of the sculpted bushes. A stunning view of the yellowish lights of the busy city of Los Angeles twinkled in the distance beyond its bounds. The planning committee had clearly gone all out on this night being bathed in luxury, as Troye silently wondered just what the venue alone would have cost to rent.

"I hope you don't mind, Troye, but I clued Joe in on your little deal with Tyler here." Caspar's voice pulled Troye out of his thoughts and he frowned slightly.

" _Your_ deal with Tyler, actually, but sure, it's fine," Troye replied and fixed his eyes on Joe, who was handing out cigars to Caspar and Tyler. "I trust you can keep your mouth closed."

"Your secret's safe with me," Joe smiled back while helping Caspar light the end of his cigar and Tyler stepped forward so Joe could do the same with his. Troye scrunched up his nose as some of the resulting smoke whirled past him and he waved his hand in front of his face to dissipate it.

"I still don't understand how you can all enjoy these nasty things," he complained, coughing slightly. "Doesn't seem pleasurable at all to me."

"Have you ever actually tried one?" Tyler asked while puffing lightly on his cigar, making sure to blow the smoke away from Troye's direction when he released it.

"No, but I tried a cigarette once when I was younger and I was sick for half a day after," he argued and narrowed his eyes when Tyler had the audacity to snigger at him.

"A cigar is not the same thing as a cigarette, Troye. The taste is much sweeter and you don't really inhale. You just let the taste of the smoke linger in your mouth a bit. It's actually quite relaxing. An added bonus is that it makes a good liquor taste even better," he said as he lifted his drink to his lips, smiling at Troye.

"Still not good enough reasons to willingly consume poison," Troye said and crossed his arms against the cold that was now starting to bother him a bit. He was about to say as much when Tyler shrugged his shoulder's and answered, "Suit yourself", quickly getting engaged in a conversation about different types of cigars with Caspar and Joe. It wasn't a topic that Troye had any interest in so he turned to look at the view instead, tuning out their voices and letting his mind wander.

Troye was glad that Tyler had made him ask all those questions earlier, opening himself up to scrutiny. Troye _had_ been curious, Tyler was right about that, but some of what Tyler told him had not only shocked but also saddened him. Okay sure, what did Troye really expect - a glittery fairy tale? This type of way to make money couldn't be many peoples first career choice and there was probably a rough back-story applied to most of those who did it.

But Troye understood what Tyler meant when he'd said that there was a sense of security in his way of handling sex. Without him saying as much, Tyler had indicated that he more or less used sex to guard his heart, twisted as it might seem. He'd probably been hurt many times before he took his detached stance on things and Troye couldn't help but feel bad for what Tyler must have gone through. Whatever it was, he'd locked it up behind a polished, well-spoken exterior and made it all look like it didn't bother him. Troye could only hope that Tyler would eventually find something else to do with his life than giving himself - or at least his body - to the highest bidder. He deserved better.

When allowing himself to think about it, though, Troye couldn't deny that Tyler had a point about the one-night stand thing. Of course Troye has had those too, like so many people his age. He'd sowed his wild oats, so to speak, when the allure of the bars back in Australia beckoned after his 18th birthday.

It was just that since waking up badly hung-over after the Halloween party last year, Troye had been left with a bad taste in his mouth in more than the literal sense. Sleeping around wasn't appealing to him anymore and since he mostly kept to himself, he'd gotten comfortable being on his own. Perhaps Troye had convinced himself that he was choosing to be lonely because he couldn't be bothered with the effort of trying not to be. Or perhaps he was afraid of being hurt - just like Tyler.

A loud bout of laughter from the others woke him up from his reverie and he blinked as he focused on Tyler. The nicotine fumes were probably filling his head, or maybe the wine was finally getting to him, but Troye was captivated by Tyler's mouth as he lifted the cigar to it.

Tyler noticed his stare and watched him with hooded eyes while slowly wrapping his lips around the thick roll of tobacco, hollowing his cheeks to gather sweet smelling smoke inside his mouth, before pursing his mouth around the mockingly phallic cigar as he pulled it back out. Troye licked his lips.

Tyler blew out the thick smoke and smirked, making Troye finally snap his eyes up to meet Tyler's.

"Did you change your mind about having a taste?" Tyler's voice came out slightly darker, almost raspy, due to the cigar and the liquor he was drinking and Troye swallowed harshly, still not breaking their stare.

"Yeah..." he whispered before realizing what he was saying and quickly shaking his head to clear his mind. "I mean no! No, thank you." Troye looked down at his shoes and heard Tyler laugh quietly, clearly having caught his slip-up. "I was just thinking of having a little stroll down in the gardens," he continued. "I bet the view looks stunning from right over on the edge of the slope there." He nodded his head back in the direction of the garden, grateful for having come up with an excuse for zoning out, even if Tyler probably wouldn't believe him.

"I'll come with you," Tyler said and handed his half-finished cigar to Caspar, and leaving his drink on the stone railing, taking Troye's glass and doing the same with that. Troye just nodded in response and turned to walk down the stone steps leading off to the side and on to a graveled walk path.

"If you're not back within an hour, I'm coming to find you and I won't care what state of undress you're in!" Caspar called out from behind him and

Troye lifted his arm, aiming a middle finger over his shoulder at him, before stuffing his hands in his pockets against the chill night air.

Tyler caught up with him after a few steps. "Are you okay?" he asked, sounding concerned.

"Yes, I just felt like a walk, that's all," Troye smiled back as they kept a slow pace down the path, the gravel crunching noisily under their feet the only sound as they fell into a comfortable silence again. While looking up at the sky and trying to see stars that he knew were drowned out by the city lights, he didn't notice that they'd reached the edge of the garden until he felt Tyler's hand gently pull him to a stop by his elbow.

He turned to look at him and found Tyler pointing at a wooden bench a few step behind them on the other side of the path, perfectly lined up for visitors to enjoy the view from. Troye walked up to it and sat down just before Tyler took a seat next to him.

"Beautiful," Tyler breathed by his side as Troye stared out over the city below.

"It really is," he agreed and smiled at the sight. His home away from home stretched on into the distance as far as he could see and it was actually daunting to see how big L.A. really was from this height.

"I don't mean the view," Tyler said with a slight chuckle and Troye turned his head to find Tyler looking at him. One side of Tyler's face was lit up by the faint glow of the city, making the little laughing-creases around his eyes more pronounced behind his glasses when his smile grew wider at Troye's answering blush.

Troye looked away quickly with a muttered "Shut up", as he fought a smile of his own.

Tyler's answering chuckle echoed slightly around the garden behind them but he didn't press the issue as he too turned to face the view.

There was a brief moment of silent contemplation before Tyler spoke again, "Moving here from the other side of the world is a big step. Why L.A.?"

Looking down at his hands as they rested in his lap, Troye fiddled a bit with the hem of his jacket. "Same reason everyone else ends up here – to pursue a career in entertainment," he shrugged and tried to block out the feelings of disappointment that always accompanied this subject when he thought about it.

"Really?" Tyler's look was full of interest. "So you're an actor?"

"Singer," Troye corrected. "And before you ask; no, I'm not going to sing anything for you," he added and lifted an eyebrow as he turned to Tyler, who lifted his hands in defense.

"I wasn't going to say a word," Tyler implored and made a crossing motion over his heart. "So how is that going for you? The career, I mean."

Troye sighed heavily. "I tried all the usual stuff; sending out demos, calling the bigger record labels, then calling the smaller ones, visiting in person... I even tried posting my stuff online but no one ever got back to me. After a while I gave up, thinking that perhaps a career in music isn't meant for me after all."

He sat forward to lean his elbows on his knees and twirled a loose thread he'd pulled from the lining of his jacket between his fingers. A hand landed on his shoulder and squeezed it firmly.

"Hey," Tyler admonished gently. "Never give up on getting what you want from life," he continued, his voice soft. "Do you think I'd be sitting here now if I had given up?"

"That's different," Troye shook his head.

"It's not. We all fight for something, regardless of whether it's a dream or our own survival. In either case it all comes down to determination and never allowing ourselves to stop trying."

"I don't know...," Troye trailed off and shook his head. He had tried so hard to get things to work for him and he just didn't have the energy anymore. But when he didn't say anything else, Tyler spoke up again.

"Well if you ever feel like picking it up again, I've got some pretty good phone numbers from people within the industry to my disposal. It's all about contacts, you know." He patted Troye's shoulder before letting his hand slide back to his side when he turned back to the view. He was mirroring the way Troye was leaning forward, but instead resting his hands on either side of his legs, gripping the edge of the seat.

Troye didn't answer him but he smiled secretly as Tyler had unknowingly repeated his parents' warning words. 'Contacts'. Yeah, he knew that now, but he doubted he would ever ask Tyler for one of those numbers. They'd probably never even see each other again after tonight.

Trying to go unnoticed in the dark, Troye glanced at Tyler out of the corner of his eye. Tyler did really seem like he had his heart in the right place though. Even if some might find his confidence off-putting, Troye figured that his brazen ways were more or less for show. And while some of the things he said certainly were bold, Tyler wasn't being rude with his remarks when you really thought about it, just very forward about what he wanted.

Imagining a different scenario, Troye wondered if he really would have had as much of an issue with all the flirting if he hadn't found out that Tyler was an escort. If Tyler had just shown up at his door as a regular blind date, wouldn't he have thought that Tyler's determination to turn anything innocent into a sexual innuendo was kind of funny? Or even kind of hot?

Troye couldn't deny that he had initially found Tyler very attractive. He still did. Not to say that looks were everything but it certainly didn't hurt that Tyler was very easy on the eyes. Only Troye had let his own "prejudice" get in his way, if he was to quote the man sitting silently next to him. Troye almost rolled his eyes. He wasn't prejudice; he was a realist!

But there was something about Tyler's way of pointing it out earlier that had unsettled him, implying that Troye wasn't open-minded enough to see that Tyler could do what he did out of free will and not be a slimy creep because of it.

His indignation grew and while sitting there in the chilly air, Troye was getting more and more determined to prove Tyler wrong, to show that he wasn't as tightly wound as Tyler thought. He wondered what Tyler's reaction would be if the next time he hinted at wanting to take things a step further, Troye actually agreed.

His stomach swooped. Could he really do something like that? Casual sex was a pretty normal thing for people to have, right? It wasn't like Troye's past was all that pristine anyway. Letting off a bit of steam probably wouldn't hurt. As Caspar had pointed out just yesterday, he hadn't "gotten any" in the past seven months, and it had been even longer than that since he'd had full on sex. Troye couldn't deny that the thought of sleeping with Tyler made his insides tingle a little bit. Maybe a good romp was just what he needed. And Tyler probably had a few tricks up his sleeve from all the experience he had.

Troye briefly wondered what kind of lover Tyler was - rough and demanding, or gentle and thorough - but he didn't linger on the thought as he felt himself blush again. Troye had reached his decision anyway; he was going to do it.

A shiver wracked Troye's frame when a sudden breeze swept over them, stirring the air and reminding him of his lack of an outer coat. Spring may be upon them but the nights still didn't allow much of the day's heat to linger for too long.

"Are you cold?" Tyler asked concernedly. "Perhaps we should go inside again."

Troye shook his head and glanced at his watch. It was nearing midnight. "Actually, I was thinking that it might be time to head home." He wrapped his arms around himself in an attempt to keep warm.

"Oh, okay." Maybe it was Troye's imagination, but Tyler sounded almost disappointed as he stared intently at his own shoes and pushed them forward into the gravel, making the pebbles pile up in front of them. The gesture was strangely childlike and it made Tyler look more insecure than he probably was.

"We can share a car back if you want," Troye added and glanced at Tyler before looking away again. Troye didn't want him to assume anything just yet. Instead he stood up and waited for Tyler to do the same.

"Alright," Tyler answered with a smile.

They walked up the path the same way they had come and onto the terrace, where they bid goodnight to Caspar and Joe. And of course Caspar couldn't resist on remarking on the fact that they were leaving together.

"Make sure to use protection, kids," he said as he waved happily after them. "And I'll call you tomorrow!"

Before Troye could tell him off for the comment, Tyler had whirled around and was walking backwards while smirking at Caspar.

"Oh, I'm busy tomorrow but after that you can call me anytime you want, sugar!" Tyler shouted back and blew him a kiss while Troye snorted by his side. Tyler turned back around and smiled widely at Troye, who couldn't help but laugh.

Leaving Caspar gaping at their backs, Tyler and Troye made their way through the ball room, where the crowd was a little bit sparser than before, and walked out into the entrance hall. As they stepped onto the tops of the stairs just outside the doors, Troye was just about to pull out his phone to call a cab when Tyler tapped his shoulder and pointed to the cars lining the street, ready to take tired party goers home.

Glad to be spared the wait, Troye almost jogged down the steps towards the first car in line. Nerves were starting to make him jittery and he figured that the sooner they could get on their way, the better his chances at not backing out on his decision to take Tyler up on his next offer. If there came one.

He paused as he settled against the soft leather seat in the back of the car after giving his address to the driver, barely noticing how it pulled away from the curb and took off down the street. What if his earlier behavior had made sure that Tyler wouldn't try asking again?

He needn't have worried though, when only a few minutes later, a warm hand found it's way onto his leg, sitting just above his knee. He glanced at the hand and turned to meet Tyler's eyes as he looked at him from across the seat.

"I hope you had at least somewhat of a good time tonight," Tyler said quietly, probably not wanting their driver to listen in. Troye scrunched his eyebrows together in question.

"What do you mean? With the way you ruffled David's feathers I honestly couldn't have asked for better company," he sniggered, trying to ignore the way his pulse sped up as Tyler's hand squeezed his leg minutely. "I hope he backs off from now on."

"He seemed like such a dick. You can do so much better," Tyler said as he looked at Troye with a serious expression on his face.

Troye's heart skipped a beat but he didn't look away. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Tyler's voice was a bit raspy and Troye's breath hitched as he felt Tyler's hand move a bit higher up on his leg, coming to rest somewhere in the middle of his thigh, the tips of his fingers reaching further down on the inside of it.

The car suddenly hit a bump in the road and the jolt made Troye break their stare to look down at Tyler's hand, watching his thumb draw small circles that sent tingles up his leg.

"Are-" Troye's voice cracked a bit and he cleared his throat before trying again. "Are you always this forward?"

"Are you always this determined to deny yourself?" Tyler answered, making Troye look up at him again, meeting his intense gaze. "When was the last time you allowed yourself to stop thinking and just feel?" Tyler bit his lip as his eyes flickered over Troye's face. "I wish you would let me help you with that," Tyler finished in a hushed tone of voice.

There it was. The offer that Troye had promised himself he wouldn't turn down. He felt heat flush his face and knew it was showing in the lights that flashed by and lit up the back seat as the car continued on its way to his place. They were nearing it now and only had about 10 minutes before they would arrive. There was just one question he needed to know the answer to before he could say yes.

"Why are you so intent on sleeping with me?" Troye asked, his voice just barely above a whisper.

"Because it would be a waste of Caspar's hard-earned money if I didn't?" There was a sparkle of humor in Tyler's eyes as he answered quickly with a question of his own.

"I don't care and I know you don't either," Troye glared at him, his voice stronger and ignoring Tyler's attempt at being funny. "Answer me. You do this all the time; why am I so special? Is it because I'm not throwing myself at you?" he pressed.

Tyler's smile eased into a smirk and Troye watched silently as he bit his lip and ran his eyes over Troye's body, slowly trailing them from his face down to where he rested his hand before lifting them back to look into Troye's eyes again.

"Aside from the fact that you're basically sex on legs and I want to see you lose a bit of that tightly held control, I guess I just want to show you what it can be like to be with someone who really knows what he's doing." Tyler was all but joking and his voice showed it in the way it had gone deeper.

Troye felt his face burn even hotter and resisted the urge to reach up and loosen his tie to ease his breathing.

"What makes you think someone hasn't shown me that already? I've had plenty of guys," he asked instead, going for a flippant tone but ending up coming off as breathy.

"You haven't had me."

A flutter filled Troye's belly and he took a deep breath before opening his mouth to whisper, "Okay."

Tyler seemed to pause momentarily and his eyes widened just slightly as he registered what Troye had said. "'Okay'?" he whispered back. "As in, you wanna...?" For all the innuendos he'd been spouting since the beginning of their night, it was quite amusing to see Tyler suddenly hesitate when talking about sex.

Troye smiled shyly as he nodded in response but gasped when he felt Tyler's hand slide higher to grip his leg just underneath the juncture of his hip and thigh, making the back of his fingers brush teasingly against Troye's bulge. A thrill ran through Troye's body and he tensed up a bit at the touch.

"Hey, relax," Tyler smiled gently, seemingly having recovered from his surprise at Troye's sudden agreement, and leaned closer across the seat to murmur, "There will be a lot more touching than this when we get to your place."

Swallowing with difficulty around his suddenly parched throat, Troye took a deep breath and settled back again, lifting his own hand to rest on top of Tyler's to show that he was okay. Tyler's hand tightened as he leaned even closer to let his nose run lightly up Troye's throat, breathing him in. 

Troye shuddered and closed his eyes, the teasingly light touch of Tyler's breath on his skin contradicting the tight grip of his hand. When Tyler reached Troye's ear, he quickly flicked his tongue against his earlobe and whispered, "You smell so good and I've been dying to tell you all night."

Troye hummed in appreciation both at the compliment and at the way Tyler's warm breath washed over his ear and he pressed down on Tyler's hand. Tyler's tongue came out to lick at his earlobe more persistently, slowly wrapping his lips around it and sucking lightly.

Troye felt a stirring in his lap and knew he'd be hard within seconds. He let out a tiny moan that turned into a slight whimper when Tyler was suddenly leaning back and away. His hand pulled out from under Troye's and Troye snapped his eyes open at the lack of contact, whipping his head around to see Tyler scoot back to his end of the seat, placing his hands in his lap and looking straight ahead.

"Wha-" was all Troye managed before Tyler spoke, sounding a bit strained.

"I don't want to reach the point where I can't stop before we go too far. Not here," he explained, speaking out of the corner of his mouth, inclining his head towards the driver.

Troye caught on and cleared his throat when he accidentally met the eyes of the driver in the rear view mirror, both of them looking away quickly. He shifted in his seat while reaching down to adjust himself in an attempt to lessen the way his pants had tightened uncomfortably around his crotch. 

Damn Tyler for getting him this worked up from practically doing nothing! It made Troye look desperate and that didn't sit well with him at all. A movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention and he peeked over at Tyler, catching him mimicking his actions, making it obvious that he was suffering too by the way his pants were tenting. Troye blushed at the knowledge that Tyler was at least as affected as him.

The minutes ticked by in a strained silence and Troye tried to use the respite to calm his breathing, but it was difficult seeing as his heart was still beating a wild rhythm in his chest. Tyler's actions had set off a rapid flurry of positively dirty images flashing through his mind as he couldn't help but imagine what might happen when they were alone.

As the car began turning down familiar streets, steadily nearing his home, Troye became somewhat nervous. No one had forced him into agreeing to sleep with Tyler, but he still couldn't help but be a bit anxious. Who could blame him really? Tyler did this kind of thing regularly and Troye hadn't been with anyone in a good while. Anyone would feel a little intimidated in his position.

But before he could linger too much on the feeling, the car rolled up to his apartment building and slowed to a stop. Troye was quicker this time, reaching for his card and handing it to the driver before Tyler could pay for another ride.

Tyler narrowed his eyes at him in mock annoyance and Troye giggled, shoving his leg. "Don't look at me like that; it's my turn to pay!"

He laughed as Tyler's scowl deepened and watched as he opened his door and stepped out. While Troye waited for the payment to process, Tyler had once more gone around the back of the car and was opening the door on his side.

"Then at least let me get the door for you, gorgeous," Tyler said as he bent down to look at Troye, a smile tugged on his lips. Troye smiled back, now getting used to the endearment and, if he was being completely honest, perhaps even starting to like it just a little. He thanked the driver when he handed Troye his card and receipt back over the center console.

Troye couldn't help but grin wider when the man mumbled, "Have a great night, kid" and winked at him in the reflection of the rear view mirror.

Tyler closed the door behind him when Troye emerged from the car and reached up to rest his hand in the small of Troye's back, tilting his head as he smiled at him.

"After you," he said and gestured towards the main entrance of the building in front of them. Troye nodded and they set off towards the door, quickly entering and climbing the two flights of stairs to Troye's floor.

Neither of them spoke and Tyler's hand stayed on his back, as if ushering him forward in their haste to get inside. Troye had his keys out and in the lock of the door to his apartment in a flash but once they walked inside, he paused, unsure of how to proceed.

Tyler, who had gone a few steps further into the apartment, turned around to look at him when he realized Troye had stopped moving.

"I can see you thinking," Tyler said as he took a step towards Troye. "Stop it." Another step. "We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with."

One more step and he was crowding Troye's personal space but still not touching anywhere. "If something doesn't feel good I want you to tell me and we'll stop immediately." Tyler reached forward and ran a light finger down the front of Troye's shirt, following its path with his eyes before looking up again. "Okay?"

"Sure," was all Troye managed to croak as his throat closed up at their proximity. He swallowed harshly before adding, "But no kissing."

"Don't worry, I remember," Tyler murmured, stepping even closer by sliding his feet in next to Troye's. His arms slipped around Troye's lower back, underneath his suit jacket, and held him steady as he leaned in, angling his head to nuzzle against Troye's pulse point. "Does that restriction include all of your body, or just your lips?" As if testing a theory, Tyler licked the spot he was breathing against and almost imperceptibly touched his lips against the skin in a light kiss.

Troye closed his eyes and whimpered pathetically. "No, b-body's fine." He could feel Tyler smiling against his neck before kissing it a bit firmer this time.

"Okay," Tyler whispered. He left words all-together as he began sucking and licking carefully at the skin of Troye's neck.

Troye gasped, closing his eyes, and wondered at the way Tyler seemed to be holding back, as if easing him into accepting the sensations he was creating. It was almost like a seduction, a gentle coaxing for him to relax. And it was working.

Troye lifted his hands to Tyler's shoulders and brushed his thumbs against the skin above Tyler's collar in confirmation that he liked the proceedings. Tyler hummed into his skin and Troye grew bolder at the sound, slipping his fingers up and into Tyler soft, short hair and gripping it lightly.

Moaning in response, Tyler slid his hands from Troye's back down to grip at his ass, taking it firmly into his hands and squeezing. He pulled Troye firmly against his own hips, rolling them to create friction between them.

Troye's breath caught when he felt Tyler's erection press firmly against him and his hips bucked of their own accord, making them both groan as the pressure became greater. Moving to lick the hollow at the bottom of Troye's throat, Tyler slid one of his hands from his ass to wiggle its way in between their bodies, cupping Troye through his pants.

Troye shuddered and leaned his head back further, gripping at Tyler's hair and biting his lip on a moan.

"Want to move this to bed?" Tyler whispered against his neck. Troye could only nod jerkily in reply, gasping when Tyler pushed the heel of his hand into Troye's erection, then massaging slowly as he trailed his warm hand over its length where it curved slightly to the left.

They started moving toward the bedroom, Tyler walking carefully backwards and drawing Troye with him, careful not to break their contact. Troye's hands slipped from Tyler hair to push his jacket from his shoulders and Tyler released him for a moment to let it slip from his arms, catching it before it fell to the floor and flinging it aside carelessly.

His mouth was still working at Troye's throat as he reached up to do the same to Troye's jacket before reaching for his tie, loosening it and sliding it from his collar with a whooshing noise. Tyler began undoing Troye's shirt buttons and licked at one of the exposed collarbones.

When Tyler had tugged the tails of Troye's shirt from his pants and finished with the buttons, Troye opened his eyes and stepped away for a moment, making Tyler's lips leave his skin with a lingering kissing sound.

Their eyes met and held across the short distance between them, both panting audibly and Troye was momentarily fascinated by the pure lust he saw shining in them. After a few moments in which they both seemed to come to terms with what was going to happen, Troye set into motion again by pulling his opened shirt from his arms, fiddling with the cuffs when they caught on his wrists.

Tyler watched him with darkened eyes as his fingers reached up to work on loosening his own tie before moving to the buttons of his shirt. Troye's gaze flickered down to follow the unveiling of Tyler's chest as he removed his shirt and he licked his lips at the sight of the lightly toned, solid body. 

Tyler was hot as fuck, there was no denying that.

He lifted his eyes back to Tyler's face and caught him studying Troye's shirtless body in much of the same manner. Tyler's mouth turned up at the corners into a now familiar smirk and lifted his eyes back to Troye's, returning his stare. Troye could easily read the approval in Tyler's gaze and felt a strange confidence come over him at the knowledge that Tyler found him attractive. Not that Tyler hadn't repeated the fact over and over again previously during the evening, but the look in Tyler's eyes spoke volumes more than words ever could.

Troye reached forward, slipping two of his finger into a belt loop on Tyler's pants and tugged lightly before turning to drag him into his bedroom, making Tyler snigger softly. Troye stopped by the side of the bed and turned around to sit on the edge.

The room was only lit by the lamp in his window, but it was enough to clearly be able to see Tyler's dilated pupils as Troye looked up at him trough his eyelashes. He bit his lip while leaning back onto his hands and scooted back on the covers, lifting one of his knees and wordlessly inviting Tyler to follow. He saw Tyler's Adam’s-apple bob as he swallowed, all mirth vanishing from his face in a flash.

"God, you're sexy," Tyler muttered and, balancing on his knuckles, he leaned forward to crawl onto the bed and settle beside him before reaching for the button on Troye's pants.

Troye leaned back on his elbows and watched with bated breath as Tyler's fingers undid his button and zipper in a few quick movements. He lifted his hips in assistance when Tyler tugged at his pants, pulling them off his legs.

Tyler leaned onto his hands once more, setting one on each side of Troye's waist and bending forward to fit his open mouth over the outline of Troye's erection through his boxers, breathing hotly through the fabric.

Troye groaned and closed his eyes, letting his head fall back at the incredibly intense heat that surrounded him. Tyler's tongue peaked out to press against him teasingly, making Troye's hips jerk, and he lifted up to look down at the top of Tyler's head.

As if feeling his eyes on him, Tyler rose slightly from his lap and fixed Troye with a dark look before reaching up to pull at the elastic at the front of his boxers, lifting it from his body to avoid dragging the rougher texture of the hem over his sensitive length, and lowering the fabric, leaving Troye completely exposed. Without breaking their gaze, Tyler lowered his head again and extended his tongue, slowly licking Troye from base to tip.

Troye's eyelids fluttered and he whimpered as Tyler repeated the motion before pressing the pad of his thumb into the softer skin between the base of his length and his balls, making his erection lift from his stomach. He wrapped his lips around the ridge of the head, which was already moist from precome, and Troye fell back on the bed, reaching down and running his fingers through Tyler's hair.

He let out a long moan when Tyler suckled gently at his very tip, his tongue flickering repeatedly over the highly sensitive string of skin just below the slit. Tyler's hands reached underneath him to slip his fingers into the waistband of Troye's boxers and tug them down the swell of his bottom, momentarily releasing his length from his mouth to lean away and pull the last remaining article of clothing from his legs. As soon as they were gone, Tyler was back in Troye's lap, sucking him into his mouth and swallowing him as deep as he could go.

Troye mewled and gripped Tyler's hair tighter, trying not to push him further down on his erection. A deep moan rose from Tyler's throat when Troye tugged on the blond strands tangled in his fists and the resulting vibration had Troye crying out. Tyler started bobbing his head slowly, pressing his tongue firmly against Troye's skin on every downward stroke and sucking harshly each time he went back up. Troye arched his back and moaned at the incredible suction Tyler was creating around his pulsing length.

Suddenly, Tyler released him with a brief slurping noise and Troye lifted his head to look blurrily at Tyler, who sat back and openly ran his eyes over him, lips slightly puffed and reddened from his ministrations on Troye's body.

Their eyes met again and Troye swallowed when Tyler reached down to his own pants, slowly popping open the buttoned closing with steady tugs of his hands, the sound of the buttons releasing their hold the only noise in the room aside from their labored breathing.

Unable to keep from looking, Troye broke their gaze to watch Tyler pull his pants and boxers down in one smooth motion, and he couldn't help but gasp when Tyler's erection sprang free from its confinements.

Tyler certainly didn't have anything to be embarrassed about, that much was clear. His thick member stood tall and proud from a neatly trimmed patch of dark-blond curls, bobbing forward slightly under its own weight.

Unconsciously licking his lips at the sight, Troye's eyes widened when the length jerked suddenly and strained towards Tyler's stomach, and he snapped his eyes up to Tyler's face when he heard him hiss.

"That tongue of yours will be the death of me, I swear," Tyler whispered harshly and Troye felt his face flush at the words.

Backing away to stand on the floor briefly, Tyler held eye contact as he stepped out of his clothes, leaving them in a pool on the floor before crawling back up on the bed, his knees nudging Troye's legs apart as he went.

Troye bent and lifted his knees, creating a haven of sorts for Tyler to rest in once they were level. Tyler's hands were planted on either side of Troye's head, keeping his torso lifted as he lowered his hips down to settle against him, firmly pressing them together.

Troye groaned as Tyler's erection aligned with his, his eyelids fluttering closed at the sensation – the feeling of intimate closeness with another person that he hadn't felt in what seemed like ages warming his chest. Troye's arms wrapped around Tyler's back of their own accord, running his hands over the muscles rippling underneath Tyler's warm skin. The heat of the added body warmth and the soft slide of another's skin against his had him smiling, sighing softly almost in relief.

Tyler must have been watching him, since he asked, "Feel good?"

Troye opened his eyes and met Tyler's laughing ones in the short distance between them and nodded, whispering, "Uh-huh", then gasping when Tyler rolled his hips.

Their erections slid wetly against each other, precome and the remaining saliva on Troye's length easing their path as they moved in the snug fit between their lower stomachs. Spikes of pleasure were shooting up Troye's spine at the friction and his eyes fell back closed when Tyler lowered himself the rest of the way, pressing their chests together and making Troye sink into the bedding slightly as Tyler settled his weight on top of him, bending down to once again suck at Troye's neck. 

Tyler's teeth nipped at Troye's earlobe again and he soothed the slight sting by wrapping his lips around the soft skin, making his labored breathing wash over Troye's ear. Shivering noticeably, Troye whimpered as the sensation caused goose bumps to rise all over his body, unconsciously lifting his hips and moaning at the answering jerk of Tyler's hips.

"Want you so bad," Tyler groaned into his ear, trailing his tongue up its edge before latching on to the very tip, sucking it briefly. "Do you want to top or bottom?" he asked in a whisper.

Troye's eyes snapped open and he paused at the unexpected question, his hands stilling on Tyler's back as he wondered why Tyler was asking at all. He was, after all, practically laying there spread eagle for Tyler to do with as he pleased, so Troye thought he'd made his preference clear. Perhaps Tyler only wanted to make sure, and wasn't that sweet of him? Troye just wasn't sure how to word his desire for Tyler to take him and not sound like a total slut.

So, as eloquently as he could, he answered, "Umm..."

Tyler chuckled softly and lifted up slightly to look down at Troye. The movement inadvertently made his hips weigh down harder on Troye's groin and Troye sucked in a quick breath as the increased pressure on his erection made his eyelids flutter. He watched with his eyelids half-closed as Tyler realized what he was doing, a knowing smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, his mood shifting.

"Would you like me to take you?" he murmured with a slow roll of his hips. "To fill you so deeply you won't know which way is up?"

Troye gasped and closed his eyes fully as Tyler's hardness slid tightly against his own.

"Stretch you to capacity," Tyler whispered as he bent down once more to lick at Troye's pulse point, making Troye tilt his head back further, his breath hitching at Tyler's words. "Want me to fuck you, Troye?"

Troye couldn't help the needy whimper that escaped him. " _Please_."

Taking his plea as a cue, Tyler began slowly kissing his way down Troye's neck, moving steadily lower until he reached the planes of his chest. He latched on to a nipple, sucking and flicking his tongue over the hardened nub, gently pinching and rolling the other one with his fingertips.

Troye's hands found their way back into Tyler's hair and scratched at his scalp with his blunt nails, making Tyler moan around the flesh in his mouth. He lifted up and raised himself onto one hand, the other slipping underneath Troye's waist, nudging him.

"Turn around," Tyler rasped and Troye took one final look at his darkened eyes before rolling over onto his stomach, following instructions. He rested his cheek against the bed and closed his eyes as Tyler backed away and reached for his pants that lay discarded on the floor at their feet.

Troye listened with bated breath as Tyler rummaged through his pockets before the distinct crinkling sounds of a plastic wrapper reached his ears. He opened his mouth to tell Tyler about the bottle of lube in his bedside drawer when he heard said drawer being opened. Tyler obviously knew where to look, probably from experience, but Troye didn't want to think about it. Not right now, when the heat of Tyler's body returned, the bed dipping under his weight as he settled at Troye's feet.

A steady hand fell between Troye's shoulder blades before slowly stroking down his back, veering off to the side when it reached the dip at the base of his spine and reaching around to grip his hip. A whispered, "Lift up" had Troye bend his knees and fold them up under his body, effectively lifting his ass into the air.

He blushed fiercely as he exposed himself to Tyler gaze. A thrill of arousal shot down his spine at the knowledge that Tyler had an uninterrupted view of his most hidden of places and he waited breathlessly for Tyler's next move.

He heard Tyler draw a sharp intake of breath, muttering, "Fuck" as if to himself. Troye jumped slightly and shivered when he felt one of Tyler's fingers land at the top of the crevice dividing his buttocks before starting a slow descent between them.

Troye mewled once the fingertip stopped as it reached the furled skin of his opening, tapping it lightly. Suddenly, the finger was gone but Troye didn't have time to protest before it returned to settle right at the centre of where he needed it, slicked with lube and pushing gently forward.

He moaned his approval as it easily slipped inside. It moved gently in and out of him a few times before drawing back out, only to return with a companion, the two of them insistently pressing forward together and slipping inside only after a moment of resistance. The pressure in his groin was steadily increasing as Tyler's fingers stretched him with sure strokes, twisting and turning, and Troye gasped sharply when the fingers bent to nudge at the bundle of nerves hidden inside of him.

His moan was long and hitching as Tyler's fingertips ran over the spot a few times before backing off and resuming their slow preparation again. Tyler's other hand was moving in lazy circles over his back, occasionally reaching further down to run his fingers into the short hair on the back of his neck, his hips bumping into Troye as he leaned forward, before trailing his hand back over his shoulder and stroking down his side.

His fingers pulled back out again, and Troye whimpered, his brow knitting and his closed eyes scrunching up when they were joined by a third, his entrance momentarily struggling to accept the invasion.

Eventually the digits sunk in and Tyler's arm reached around to Troye's stomach as he was still leaned over his back, his warm breath a brief warning just before his lips settled at the juncture of Troye's neck and shoulder, sucking lightly, almost as if in apology.

"Almost there, gorgeous," Tyler whispered against Troye's damp skin. "I have to make sure I won't hurt you."

Troye nodded, his cheek rubbing against the sheets and his chest constricting slightly at the consideration in Tyler's voice. He tried to keep his breathing steady as Tyler's fingers moved slowly but surely in and out of him and he let himself get lost in the sensations.

Troye didn't notice the time passing until the fingers suddenly pulled out, leaving him feeling strangely bereft and empty. He let out a moan of protest while Tyler licked at his neck one last time before leaning back up, taking the heat of his body with him, and it made Troye shiver from the comparably cold air of the room hitting his skin.

There was a rustle of movement behind him and he could hear Tyler rip the condom package open, then silence as he prepared himself. Troye waited with bated breath, not daring to move, before Tyler shuffled forward and settled further in between Troye's bent legs. A hand landed on his hip, holding him steady and Troye's eyes opened, peeking back over his shoulder.

Tyler rose up on his knees, looking down his own body as he held himself in hand, aiming and settling the tip of his slicked erection against Troye's entrance. He paused then, his eyes lifting to Troye's face as if to gauge his reaction and Troye saw him start a little to find Troye's gaze already on him.

Troye opened his mouth, already knowing what Tyler was going to ask. "I'm ready, Tyler," he whispered. He felt Tyler's thumb brush over his hipbone.

"I'll go slow, okay?" Tyler murmured and began pressing forward.

Troye closed his eyes and inhaled deeply through his nose, his hands instinctive gripping the sheets by the sides of his head and tensing his shoulders. The pressure on his opening was unrelenting and he groaned at the first signs of his muscles beginning to loosen to give way for the invasion.

Before he knew it, the blunt head of Tyler's length breached him and he cried out weakly at the sharp burn of the wide stretch. It wasn't necessarily a bad feeling, just overwhelming and he needed a moment to compose himself.

He heard Tyler groan behind him. "Fuck, you're tight," he hissed and moved his hands up from Troye's hips, running them up his back to grip at his shoulders as he slowly sank further in. He paused, pulling back out a bit before resuming his forward motion and repeated it, gently easing further and further inside by increments.

Troye's breathing was hitched, his lungs not cooperating as Tyler filled him, steadily going deeper inside of him than anyone had been before, treading new territory and unapologetically marking it as his.

After what seemed like eternity, Tyler stopped moving, his hips now resting flush against Troye. He leaned forward over Troye's back once more, his hands sliding down Troye's arms and coming to rest beside Troye's own fisted ones. Tyler thumbs stroked over the backs of Troye’s hands and he kiss the soft skin behind his ear.

"Are you alright?" he whispered, panting as if he'd run a marathon.

Troye licked his lips and closed his mouth to swallow with difficulty, trying to control his breathing enough to form coherent words. His entrance was pulsing, distracting him from coming up with an answer. He was so full.

"I- I'm..." he stuttered, gulping down a few shallow breaths before trying again. "Move, Tyler. I need you to move!"

Tyler moaned and began pulling back, pushing forward again carefully.

"Faster!" Troye gasped out, not caring about how needy he sounded.

Tyler growled and pulled out further, only to slam back in quickly, and Troye whimpered pathetically. Slowly increasing the speed, Tyler began pumping his hips in steady thrusts, leaving nipping bites and sucking kisses along Troye's shoulders and neck.

Troye was a moaning, gasping mess, constantly in movement under Tyler, pushing back against him on every forward thrust, his pleasure mounting as Tyler's big member kept plowing into him relentlessly.

Finishing off a particularly harsh bite on Troye's neck, Tyler lifted his head as if to admire the bruise. His hips slowed and Troye's eyes flew open almost in a blind panic, wondering why Tyler was stopping. Tyler's arms wrapped under his armpits, his hands reaching up to grip his shoulders from the front and before Troye could ask what was going on, Tyler hoisted him up and lifted Troye from the bed. 

Sitting up straight, Tyler settled back on his haunches and pulled Troye into his lap, pressing him down onto his pelvis.

Troye's eyes squeezed shut and he keened loudly as the position made Tyler sink even deeper inside him, the new angle pressing his hard length against Troye's prostate.

"Oh, fuck!" Troye swore, leaving his mouth hanging open as his hand flew past his shoulder to grip the back of Tyler's head, scrambling to grab one of the hands resting on his chest with the other, needing something to hold on to as he wobbled precariously.

Tyler groaned and snapped his hips upwards, making Troye cry out again, his head lolling back to lean on Tyler's shoulder. Arms tightening their hold on Troye's body, Tyler began rolling his hips, his length sliding in and out of Troye's clenching hole in minute movements.

Troye was constantly mewling as the unyielding pressure on his prostate was pushing him towards his completion faster than he had ever thought possible without any outer stimulation.

"Open your eyes, Troye," Tyler suddenly rasped against his neck. "I want you to see what I'm seeing, because it's beautiful."

Troye frowned in confusion at Tyler's word, lifting his head to look at him over his shoulder in question. Tyler was staring straight ahead, however, so Troye turned his face forward to see what he meant.

He gasped and froze at the sight. Troye had completely forgotten about the mirrors on his wardrobe. Staring back at him from across the room was his very own reflection, even if he had a hard time recognizing himself in the young man hanging pliant and disheveled in Tyler's strong arms.

The light from the lamp on his window sill was hitting him at just the right angle for him to see that his skin was flushed and his eyes glazed over from pleasure, surprised that the blue of his irises were almost completely covered in black. The hair on his head was tousled, much like the blond strands seen beside his reflection. Troye's eyes flickered over to meet the dark gaze of the other man, who was watching him over his shoulder through the mirror, before something else caught his eye.

Sitting they way they were, facing the side of his bed, Troye was able to see himself fully on display, his erection straining against his taught belly, his balls drawn up tight, and a shadow of movement further back in between his legs.

Feeling, as well as seeing himself flush even hotter, he whimpered as he realized he was looking at Tyler's thick hardness move up inside him, the root of his length vanishing out of sight and appearing again with every rolling movement of his body.

Melting back into Tyler's chest, Troye whimpered and unconsciously spread his knees wider. With his eyes firmly fixed on the spot, he began pumping his own hips unsteadily.

Tyler stilled his hips, his hands quickly finding their way to Troye's ass, helping to lift him up before letting gravity drop him down onto his erection over and over again. Troye's free hand reached around his back to grip Tyler's waist for balance, moaning breathlessly every time Tyler bottomed out.

Transfixed by the sight of Tyler being swallowed up inside of him with every downward motion, Troye almost forgot to breathe. He'd never seen anything like it, much less let himself abandon every single one of his inhibitions in this way.

His half-closed eyes were still focused fully on the point of penetration between them, making him almost miss the way Tyler's hand reached around him to grab his bobbing erection, beginning to stroke it firmly while licking the back of his neck.

Crying out at the bombardment of stimulation, both visual and physical, swarming his numbed mind, Troye clenched his thighs together far as Tyler's legs allowed and closed his eyes tightly. Helplessly reduced into a mushy pile of sharp pleasure, Troye was being hurled towards his climax. His hips stuttered to a stop, unable to keep the pace going, grateful when Tyler took over.

Tyler folded his forearm over Troye's lower stomach, his grip bruising and pinning him in place as he slammed upwards, plunging into Troye's prostate while still stroking him quickly with his other hand.

Troye screamed, his orgasm hitting him with the force of a freight train. Stars burst behind his eyes as he shuddered uncontrollably in Tyler's lap, faintly registering Tyler's own shout of completion over the rushing of blood in his ears, before a set of teeth sank deep into his shoulder.

The hand around his erection stilled, just holding it by the base as his release landed in wet splashes across his chest. His hips jerked violently of their own accord with every spasm of his muscles, the arm across his belly unable to hold him still as he gasped desperately for air.

Tyler's bucking hips jolted him a few more times, making Troye bounce slightly on his lap, the length inside of him pulsing in release and ripping ruined moans from Troye's throat.

As abruptly as their climax had hit them, everything suddenly stilled. The sound of harsh, raspy breathing was the only thing disrupting the peace, like the pelting rain left behind by a thunderstorm. They stayed like that, just breathing rapidly together, not moving a limb while trying to slow their stuttering hearts.

Tyler was the first to find his voice, his words breaking the silence, sounding almost reverent as he gasped, "Holy shit."

-


	5. Last Night You Were Who You Prefer Because Of Me

-  
Tyler could barely catch his breath, his two short words coming out weak and wheezy. Troye was still leaning heavily against him, his eyes closed and chest moving rapidly up and down. He quivered as his muscles contracted spasmodically in the aftermath of climax.

The hand in Tyler's hair was continuously tightening and loosening its hold with every twitch of Troye's body while the other had fallen to lie limply in his lap. If it hadn't been for those small, regular movements, Tyler would have wondered if Troye was conscious at all.

Slowly stroking his hands down Troye's thighs, Tyler ducked his head and licked gently at the teeth marks he'd made on Troye's shoulder. They were starting to form a bruise.

Troye groaned before slowly lifting his head. Releasing his hold on Tyler's hair, Troye lifted his arm back over to his front and wiped a shaky hand over his sweaty face. He blinked his eyes open and met Tyler's almost instantly in the mirror across the room. Tyler planted a light kiss on the mark under his lips.

"You okay?" His words were muffled as he spoke against Troye's skin, still keeping their gazes locked in the reflection. Troye shifted slightly in his lap, making Tyler's slowly softening length swirl inside him and Troye gasped.

"I think so," he breathed, his voice sounding raw. He sat up from where he was resting on Tyler's chest. Tyler reached back to Troye's hips to help him when Troye braced himself on Tyler's thighs and started slowly lifting himself up from his lap. A wince flittered over his face and a small moan escaped him when Tyler slipped from his body and Tyler stroked his back in apology.

"Sore?" he whispered as Troye shuffled forward carefully before flopping unceremoniously to the side and rolling over onto his back on the bed, resting his head on the pillows. His eyes were closed and he took a deep breath through his nose before opening them, looking up at the ceiling.

"A bit." He seemed to pause to think for a moment before continuing, "But it's a good sore."

Tyler couldn't help but snigger and was happy to see Troye trying to fight a smile of his own. It didn't seem to be working as Troye's lips soon stretched into a wide grin that made Tyler laugh despite himself. Troye rolled his eyes and began pulling the covers out from underneath his back, but never lost his toothy smile as he eventually succeeded in burying himself in the fluffy duvet.

Tyler chuckled again before reaching down to remove the condom and tie it off in a knot, dropping it over the side of the bed and lifting his eyes back to Troye's face. His eyes had fallen closed and his smile was smaller, looking like he'd fall asleep at any second.

Tyler hesitated. Should he leave? Sure, he had been paid to stay the night, but would Troye want that? Tyler knew that Troye had had nothing to do with the booking and it was well within his rights to not want Tyler to stay the night.

Before Tyler could voice his questions however, the corner of the cover flipped open on the unoccupied side of the bed. Tyler looked quickly to Troye's face, but it was unchanged as if he didn't want to acknowledge the gesture, and Tyler smiled slowly as he leaned sideways on his elbow and lifted the cover to quickly shuffle his legs in between the sheets.

Tyler reached up to remove his glasses and put them on the bedside table before he turned back to rest his head on his hand. He studied Troye's features quietly where he lay resting against the pillows next to him. Troye truly was beautiful. Tyler let his eyes fall to his plump bottom lip which was practically begging for someone to give it a good nibble.

"What?" Troye asked suddenly, apparently having been aware of Tyler's silent scrutiny even while his eyes were closed.

Tyler thought for a moment before asking the question that had been nagging at the back of his mind practically all night. "How come you won't let me kiss you?"

Troye's eyes opened but he didn't look at him, instead focusing on the ceiling again.

"Do you normally kiss your clients?"

"Yes, I do actually." Tyler knew what Troye was getting at. He was well aware that many of the workers in his trade didn't share kisses with their clients. Tyler, however, had never had any problem with doing so.

"I'm surprised to hear that, to be honest," Troye said as he began absentmindedly fiddling with the corner of the duvet in his hands. "To me, kissing is something intimate, shared between people who care about each other. Aren't escorts supposed to believe that too?"

Tyler took a deep breath and shrugged slightly. "Many do, but I don't really mind it. In lack of a better word, I guess you could say that I offer 'the boyfriend experience'," he explained and Troye turned his head to look at him curiously. "After all, kissing can be very erotic. It heightens the pleasure considerably, which is good since I want to leave my clients satisfied and willing to shop again."

He smiled a little at his own joke before continuing. "But I respect you for not wanting to do that, even if I think it's a shame. Your lips look very kissable," he trailed off in a whisper and watched in fascination as yet another blush colored Troye's cheeks. How Troye still managed to blush after what they had just done was a mystery to Tyler, but he wasn't complaining. It was actually very cute.

"Well I wouldn't know, since they're mine and all," Troye murmured, looking down at his hands, "but thank you." His eyes lifted back to Tyler's and Tyler smiled.

"You're welcome," he replied softly before settling down on the pillows. He smiled wider when he saw Troye's mouth suddenly opened wide on a yawn. "You must be exhausted, by the way, seeing as you've just had quite a workout," he sniggered.

Troye flung his arm out to slap him half-heartedly on his upper arm with the back of his hand and scoffed, "Oh my god, shut up."

Tyler laughed again while Troye rolled over onto his side with his back turned towards him, pulling the covers up higher until only his head poked out from underneath them. Tyler was about to close his eyes when he felt Troye's hand reach back to grab his arm and drape it over his waist.

Tyler's smile widened into a grin and rolled onto his side, shifting closer. He flattened his palm over Troye's front and pulled him back against his chest, nuzzling the hair at the back of Troye's neck lightly.

"So you're a cuddler, huh?" he murmured, making the hairs shift under his breath. He lifted his head a bit to peek over into the mirror where he could see a small answering smile form on Troye's lips in the reflection.

"Sleep," was all he got in response however and Tyler chuckled slightly before pressing a soft kiss to the warm skin in front of him.

"Night," he whispered and let his eyes fall shut, settling down with his forehead resting against Troye's soft hair. He listened for a while as Troye's breathing got steadily deeper and slower. Lulled by the sound and the steady rise and fall of Troye's chest under his arm, Tyler followed Troye into peaceful oblivion not long after.

-x-

The harsh, blaring noise of a phone signal coming from somewhere out in the living room ripped them both from their sleep.

A groan rose from the warm body in Tyler's arms. He was almost hit in the temple with an elbow when Troye turned into their embrace while throwing an arm up to cover his eyes.

"What time is it?" Troye rasped in a sleepy voice.

Tyler turned his head to squint at the alarm clock he'd noticed standing on the bedside table. The bright red digits showed '9:43' and he turned back around to repeat the number against Troye's skin. He snuggled deeper into the bed and pulled Troye's warm body closer, his words getting muffled against Troye's shoulder.

"Ignore it," he grumbled and tightened his arm around Troye's torso before relaxing again when Troye turned back over on his side.

"I am," Troye answered and settled into Tyler's chest once more.

They had just fallen back into a light slumber when the ringing pierced the air again. This time, Troye sighed loudly and flipped the covers back before shuffling out of the bed. Tyler blinked his eyes open and watched Troye's reflection in the closet doors as he pulled on a pair of sweats before dragging his feet across the carpet and out the door.

Tyler smirked when he thought he spied a bit of a limp in Troye's step. He hoped Troye was okay. He had been kind of rough last night, after all. The thought brought a flash of an image from when Tyler had watched as Troye started pumping himself up and down on Tyler's lap, his brow knit tight and his mouth hanging open.

Tyler closed his eyes and felt his member twitch and fill a bit at the memory, but he quickly shoved the thoughts away, seeing as he didn't want to get a full blown hard-on when a certain very able bodied young man wasn't in bed with him anymore.

There were sounds of movement coming from the other room and Tyler opened his eyes again when Troye's voice drifted back to him from the door.

"Are you staying for breakfast?" Troye asked almost shyly. "All I have is toast, sorry."

Tyler turned over on his back to look at him and leaned up on his elbows. "Will there be coffee?" he asked as he rubbed a hand over his tired eyes and up into his hair trying to tame the bed head he knew he was sporting.

When he focused back on Troye, squinting his eyes since his glasses were still resting on the bedside table, Tyler thought he saw Troye gulp, but he couldn't be sure.

"Yes. There's a tin can in the fridge. Can you start the brew while I take a quick shower?"

Tyler frowned. "You keep the coffee in the fridge?"

"Yeah, to keep it fresh," Troye stated as if it was obvious.

Tyler lifted his eyebrows and nodded slowly. "Okaaay..." He dragged the word out to show his skepticism but didn't comment on it further. Instead he reached for the corner of the duvet and pulled it back while sliding his legs out towards the edge of the bed, slowly sitting up. He saw Troye's eyes widen before quickly ducking his head back out the door.

"I'll just be a second!" Troye called and Tyler heard him close the bathroom door before the distinct sounds of a shower starting reached his ears.

Tyler sighed quietly. He wouldn't have minded sharing that shower with Troye but he couldn't just barge in and join him now.

Or could he?

He shook his head. No. Coffee. He was going to go make the coffee and wait for Troye to finish his shower in private.

So, after reaching for his pants in the pile of clothes on the floor, Tyler quickly pulled them on and stood up to close the buttons, choosing to go commando since he couldn't seem to find his underwear. He picked up the discarded condom, holding it by the knot between his fingertips, and made his way to the kitchen, fishing up his shirt were it lay on the floor in the living room on the way. 

After throwing the condom in the trash and washing his hands in the sink, he shrugged on his shirt, closing a few of the buttons in the middle, and began preparing the coffee. A while later, Tyler was leaning back against the counter, sipping a cup of steaming java and thinking back on the events of the night before.

During the car ride back, when he'd asked if Troye'd had somewhat of a good time, what he'd meant was that he'd noticed how demure Troye had become since their discussion on his job. It certainly hadn't helped when that asshat David had showed up to ruin the mood further. It was as if Troye had fallen into his own thoughts and wasn't entirely present after that.

There was, however, a point when they'd sat on that bench in the garden when Troye had seemed to almost breathe easier. Tyler didn't know what had changed or what they'd said to bring it about, but Troye had subsequently relaxed and even smiled a bit. As if he'd let go of his worries.

Tyler smiled at the memory of how Troye had seemed to melt under his touch in the car after they left and was just about to take another sip off his coffee when Troye appeared in the kitchen doorway. Tyler lifted his head and paused with his cup halfway to his mouth at the sight. With the casual clothing being a stark contrast to the formal wear they'd worn last night, Troye looked very different in the sweats and t-shirt that now hung a bit loose on his slim body. It was a good different, though, Tyler concluded as he watched Troye's shirt ride up to show a sliver of skin at his waist when he lifted his arm to rub at his neck, looking up at Tyler through his eyelashes.

"You can use the shower if you want," Troye said as he wandered over to lift the coffee pot sitting on the counter next to Tyler. His chocolate brown locks flopped loosely on his head, still a bit wet and falling over his forehead when he bent forward to aim the hot liquid into the cup that Tyler had placed there for him.

Tyler studied him closely as Troye lifted the cup to his mouth, sipping it carefully. His eyes flitted up to meet Tyler's over the brim. "What?!" Troye asked after he'd swallowed his mouthful of coffee, apparently aware that this was the second time he'd asked Tyler as much in just a few hours.

"I like your hair like that," Tyler said casually, nudging his head while looking up at said mop of hair, taking a drink from his own cup. Troye's hand went up seemingly automatically and he ran it through his hair while he looked away. His answering smile was almost sheepish.

"I haven't styled it yet."

"It looks good," Tyler reassured him with a smile before leaning away from the counter and turning to place his cup back down on it. "I'll take that offer of a shower actually, if you don't mind."

Troye quickly looked back up at him and nodded. "Of course! There are fresh towels in the cupboard under the sink. Help yourself to anything you might need."

Tyler let his smile transform into a smirk and trailed his eyes suggestively over Troye's body before murmuring, "Anything, you say?"

He winked when he met Troye's eyes again and couldn't help the laugh that escaped him when he saw Troye flush and look down at his feet, obviously trying to fight a smile of his own with the way the corners of his lips quivered.

Chuckling softly, Tyler took pity on the younger man and turned around to make his way out of the kitchen and towards the bathroom. Once there, he closed the door behind him, pulled a fluffy towel from the cupboard and quickly stripped out of his clothes while placing his glasses on the edge of the sink. When the hot stream of water hit his back as he stepped in under the shower head, Tyler let his head fall forward and leaned forward on his hands where he brought them up to rest against the cold tiles of the shower wall.

A pensive mood had suddenly overcome him. It was a rare occasion, but Tyler couldn't help but wonder how things could have been if he'd met Troye outside of his role as an escort. If he'd not been what he is. The man he'd left with his coffee in the kitchen was a rare kind; almost shy but also passionate. Introverted yet still fiery. Troye could probably bite your head off just as easily as he seemed to be overcome with a blush.

Tyler sighed and leaned his head back, placing his face under the spray of water and letting it soak his hair before shaking his head, sputtering slightly and blinking his eyes open. Thoughts of this nature would only lead to problems. Tyler knew from experience that letting himself linger on someone like Troye could quickly grow addictive. Even a whisper of anything of the sort would have his boss furious. You simply did not step outside the bounds of the business aspect with a client. Distance was essential and sex was easy to keep distant, strange as it might seem. A mutual agreement to get off, nothing more, nothing less. Perhaps it was a good thing that Troye refused to kiss him, Tyler mused.

Refusing to think about it more, Tyler reached for the shower gel and lathered up before quickly rinsing himself off again. His movements were fast and economic, not wanting to waste anymore time in the shower. He dried himself off after stepping out and realized that the steam filling the small room made it virtually impossible for him to step back into his suit pants without them clinging uncomfortably to his skin. Instead, he wrapped the towel loosely around his waist and opened the door, getting hit with a wave of cold air.

Just as he stepped out and placed his slightly fogged up glasses back on, Troye called out to him from the bedroom. "I've got a t-shirt you can have if you want to change!"

Tyler smiled and, carrying his clothes in his hand, he wandered towards the sound of Troye's voice. He stopped when he reached the doorway and watched silently as Troye held up a washed out band t-shirt in front of him as if sizing it up. His side was turned to Tyler and while he didn't look at him, he did seem to be aware that Tyler was standing there since he continued in a lower volume, "It's an old one, hope you don't mind. It might be a bit tight on y-"

Troye cut himself off when he turned his head to look at Tyler. He froze, his arms still stretched and holding the t-shirt by its shoulders. Tyler watched Troye's gaze slowly trail down his chest, where a few stray drops that had lingered in his hair landed on his shoulders before haltingly rolling down his skin. Troye's eyes widened slightly as they landed on the low-slung towel hanging from his hips.

Tyler felt his length stir despite himself just from having Troye's eyes so intently focused on him and he glanced down his own body to see the towel lift away a bit from his front as a result. He quirked his lips up to one side and lifted one of his eyebrows at the sight before looking back up at Troye above the rim of his glasses.

"Wanna go again?"

Troye quickly lifted his eyes to meet Tyler's at the question and drew his bottom lip in between his teeth, chewing it in thought. There was a silent pause and Tyler held his breath, waiting for Troye's answer. Troye swallowed visibly, his eyes still fixed on Tyler, and slowly lowered his arms down to his sides.

Then he nodded.

The small movement had Tyler quickly moving forward, noting how Troye's eyes widened before Tyler pulled him close by the front of his shirt.

Troye squeaked while Tyler latched his open mouth onto his neck. Tyler grabbed the hem of Troye's shirt and lifted it, the backs of his fingers stroking the warm skin as he ran them up Troye's sides. Troye dropped the t-shirt he was holding in his hands and lifted his arms obediently when Tyler leaned back to pull his shirt over his head.

Troye grunted when Tyler grabbed hold of his narrow waist and ducked his head to once more seal his lips over Troye's shoulder, pressing their chests together. He sucked harshly on one of the bruises he'd left on the pale skin the night before. Troye's deep moan sent vibrations through the flesh under Tyler's lips and Tyler released it to trail up Troye's neck, nibbling his way up to suck at his pulse point. 

Gasping, Troye tilted his head back while wrapping his arms around Tyler's shoulders. He splayed the fingers of one of his hands on the back of Tyler's neck and pulled him closer in the universal sign of 'Yes, please keep doing that'.

Stroking his hands down Troye's smooth back, Tyler's fingers dipped into the waistline of his sweatpants and pushed them down. He let gravity do the rest as the garment fluttered down Troye's legs while Tyler's hands settled over his naked buttocks, pulling him closer. Moaning at the feeling of Troye's arousal pressing against his own, Tyler slowly turned them around and steered Troye towards the foot of the bed.

Troye stumbled a little and yelped when Tyler lifted his head and shoved him backwards. Troye fell back on the mattress and quickly sat up on his elbows, looking up at Tyler with shock clearly written on his face.

Smirking in response, Tyler reached down to untie his towel, letting it slip from his hips. He tossed it aside and bit his lip when Troye's eyes immediately fell to his pulsing member. He took a step forward and placed his hands on Troye's shoulders, pushing gently until he was lying flat on his back, his legs still hanging over the edge of the bed. Troye moaned as Tyler leaned down to nibble at his jaw before slowly kissing and licking his way down the soft skin of Troye's neck. Biting carefully at his collarbones, Tyler smiled as he felt Troye's fingers weave into his hair.

He paused at Troye's chest to lave his tongue over first one nipple, then the other. Troye sucked in a harsh breath and curved his back from the bed, pressing himself against Tyler's mouth, his fingers gripping Tyler's hair. Tyler felt the skin under his tongue draw tight under his attention and suckled gently. He left the hardened flesh with a light kiss before continuing to lick a path down over the flat stomach, teasingly dipping his tongue inside Troye's navel. He chuckled softly when Troye sucked his belly in at the no doubt tickling sensation.

His hands moved from Troye's shoulders and stroked down over his chest, Tyler's splayed fingers following the same route that his mouth had taken. He slowly came to rest on his knees on the floor at the foot of the bed, in between Troye's legs. Troye whined when Tyler drew nearer to the length straining against his belly, rubbing at Tyler's scalp with his fingertips, clearly wanting his mouth on him.

Smiling against Troye's skin, Tyler skimmed passed his erection, careful not to touch it, and stuck out his tongue to lick his way further to the side. He stopped when he reached the crease dividing the top of Troye's leg from his groin. Tyler kissed the sensitive skin lightly while stroking his hands down Troye's waist, pausing to caress his hips with his thumbs, before continuing down his thighs. When Tyler's hands reached the backs of Troye's knees, he grabbed them and lifted his legs, pushing them up against his chest.

Troye whimpered, most likely figuring out what Tyler had in mind, and removed his hands from Tyler's head to grab at the sheets beside him for balance.

Tyler kept his arms stretched to hold Troye's legs in place and pressed a light kiss on the inside of Troye's thigh. He noted how Troye's knuckles whitened when he bent down further to kiss the taut skin just above Troye's entrance.

A whimper rose from Troye's throat as Tyler drew back to breath hotly over his flesh, quickly removing his glasses and stowing them under the bed so they wouldn't get trampled by accident. Repositioning his hand on Troye's leg, Tyler couldn't hold back his own moan when he leaned forward again to lick a broad, wet stripe over Troye's furled opening. It twitched under his tongue and Troye cried out above him, his fists lifting the sheets from the bed.

Tyler's own hands tightened their grip on the backs of Troye's thighs, pressing down hard to hold them in place when Troye's body bucked wildly. Tyler smiled, forming his tongue into a point and pressing it right to the center of Troye's entrance, prodding gently before drawing back again.

The whines and moans spilling from Troye's lips were a constant as Tyler flicked his tongue back and forth over his sensitive skin, occasionally pushing forward almost to the point of breaching him before pulling back to continue the teasingly light touches. Every now and then, Tyler let his teeth scrape over the rim, quickly soothing it with the flat of his tongue.

When the muscles began to relax under his ministrations, Tyler leaned back to suck one of his fingers into his mouth, wetting it thoroughly and pulling it out to place it against the creased skin. He pushed forward slowly, feeling his fingertip sink into the flesh steadily and moaning when Troye's opening accepted the digit inside.

Troye inhaled deeply and tried to move down on Tyler's finger, grunting in protest when he pulled it back, only to gasp when Tyler pressed it in to the knuckle a moment later. Tyler leaned forward and licked wetly at the skin surrounding his finger and twisted his hand, turning it palm up. He pressed his tongue against the rim, slowly nudging it in alongside the finger.

A cry escaped Troye at the stretch and Tyler curled his finger to rub the tip against his prostate. Troye's entire body shuddered and Tyler pulled his tongue back, listening intently to Troye's whining moans. Tyler felt a drop of precome slowly glide down his own length at the sounds he was eliciting from Troye, once more amazed by the passion in his complete surrender to pleasure.

Setting a steady pace, Tyler began moving his finger in and out of the tight ring of muscles, bending forward to skim the edges with the tip of his tongue, his open mouth allowing his breath to wash hotly over the wet skin.

Once he felt the opening loosen a little, he pulled his finger out entirely, only to dive straight back in with his tongue, sealing his lips around the entrance when he couldn't go any deeper.

Troye screamed and arched his back, and Tyler had to reach up quickly to hold Troye's legs in position so that his tongue wouldn't be dislodged from the muscles that gripped it tight, as if fighting his presence there. He wiggled his wet flesh inside Troye and moaned at the resulting whimpers he got in response.

Tyler pulled his tongue out and plunged it back in a few more times before the height of his own arousal slowly started to prove too much for his patience.

Sitting back on his heels, Tyler leaned away from Troye's body and brushed his hands down the backs of his legs before letting them fall into his own lap. Troye's legs fell over the edge of the bed again and he whimpered, lifting his head up to look at Tyler.

His cheeks were flushed red and he was panting steadily through his open mouth. Tyler licked his lips, only recognizing the suggestive nature of the gesture when Troye gasped and flicked his gaze down to follow the movement.

"Scoot up," Tyler croaked and leaned over to the side where his pants lay discarded, fishing out a new condom from one of the pockets. Troye quickly turned over and scrambled up the bed, falling onto his back when he reached the pillows.

Meanwhile, Tyler braced himself on his knees and stood up from the floor. He sauntered over to the bedside table and pulled the lube out from the drawer. Turning towards the bed, Tyler eyed Troye up and down as he lay amid the tangled sheets looking up at Tyler, his hands holding the lower corners of the pillow and legs bent and open.

Tyler smirked at the picture Troye made, laying there ready and willing, and shook his head gently at the utter paradox to the man full of protests he'd met just the night before.

He kneeled on the edge of the bed and shuffled over to sit in between Troye's legs, popping the top of the lube bottle open on the way. Measuring out a liberal amount into his right hand, Tyler scooted closer and rubbed the slick substance over Troye's entrance before looking up at his face. He chuckled before tossing the closed bottle of lube onto the bed carelessly.

"What now?" Troye frowned at his light laughter, his question turning into a moan when Tyler sank two fingers inside him at once, making the frown fall away as his eyelids fluttered, hands tightening their grip on the pillow.

Tyler snorted lightly in amusement, still smiling. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

He couldn't help but wink at Troye, who moaned again when Tyler pulled his fingers out and pressed them back in slowly, wiggling them on the way, gently loosening him up. Curling them upwards, Tyler's aim was precise as he pressed the tips of his fingers into Troye's sensitive gland without hesitation.

Troye gasped and closed his eyes, pressing his head back in the pillows. "Why do you ask?" he asked breathily, beginning to roll his hips in rhythm with Tyler's pumping fingers.

"No reason, really," Tyler smiled, almost idly studying the way Troye pushed himself down on his hand. He added a third finger, feeling Troye's opening stretch slowly but surely under his ministrations. "You just seem very horny, is all."

Troye groaned and arched his back from the bed momentarily, breathing hard through his open mouth. A few heart beats later he relaxed back and blinked his eyes open before fixing them on Tyler, who saw a glint in them that he'd not seen up until that point.

"Then help me take care of that, would you?" Troye replied, the low tone of his voice carrying a challenge.

Tyler felt his smile drop as he stilled his movements. He looked down to watch his fingers as he pulled them slowly from Troye's body, enjoying the sound of a small whimper escaping Troye when they left him completely. Reaching over to grab the condom from the sheets next to him, Tyler quickly opened the package with his teeth and rolled it on.

He coated himself with the remaining lube in his palm before lifting his hands to the backs of Troye's legs, once more pressing them up towards Troye's chest, making his hips tilt up from the bed. He shuffled closer and placed the tip of his erection against Troye's entrance, lifting his eyes to catch Troye's gaze before beginning to press forward.

Tyler watched Troye's eyes roll back into his head before he closed them tightly and a loud groan rose from his throat when Tyler slowly pushed himself inside. Tyler grunted at the maddeningly tight grip around his erection but didn't stop moving until his hips were pressing against Troye's ass, breathing harshly.

"Better?" he panted, leaning his weight on his hands as they held Troye's legs flush against his chest.

Troye didn't reply. Instead, his open mouth released choked puffs of air, his breathing rapid and stilted. His eyes were screwed shut and his hands flew up to Tyler's biceps, clamping down in a vice-like grip.

Tyler was sure he'd have bruises from Troye's fingertips as they dug into his skin, but he didn't care. All he could focus on was the intense heat that surrounded his length in a snug fit, strong muscles rippling around him with every shallow breath that Troye drew.

He waited as patiently as he could, panting heavily, and eventually felt Troye's hands ease off a bit in their grip on his arms, his body relaxing slowly as if reconciling with Tyler's presence deep within him. Tyler bit his lip and looked down to watch himself pull back out slowly, hearing Troye hiss through his teeth, until only the very tip of his length remained inside. Stalling there for a moment, Tyler groaned as he began to sink in again, lifting his gaze to Troye's flushed face when he heard him release a long moan.

Grabbing hold of the front of Troye's legs, Tyler raised them up to settle them over his shoulders while sitting back on his calves. He pulled Troye's hips into his lap, making his lower back rest on Tyler's thighs and leaving his shoulders and head tilted down into the bed.

Troye whimpered as his hands returned to the pillow under his head, still keeping his eyes tightly closed. Tyler knew that the angle made his erection press insistently into Troye's sweet spot. Moaning at the answering tightening of Troye's entrance, he started pumping his hips in short thrusts while curling his hands around Troye's legs to keep him in place. He turned his head and licked the inside of one of the knees resting on his shoulders, kissing it lightly before turning back to focus on Troye.

Troye's body was undulating on the bed, his back arching to press down against Tyler every time he pushed forward. Their movements were quick, almost rushed, and Troye was moaning repeatedly as they worked together towards their release. His hands where holding the pillow as if trying to anchor himself, not realizing that the effort was in vain since Tyler's thrusting had him sliding slightly up and down on the sheets.

Tyler moaned, overcome by a rush of heat while gazing down at Troye's wantonly pliant body once more giving into the passion that Troye's mind had denied him. The sight had Tyler's hips bucking of their own accord and made him plunge inside harder than before.

Troye choked on his breath and his eyes flew open at the sudden force before looking down and meeting Tyler's gaze unwaveringly. Biting his lip from the effort, Tyler sped up his movements, pulling Troye tightly against himself with every thrust of his hips and feeling his completion approaching fast.

For a long time now, Tyler had been under the impression that he had good control of his body and what he wanted it to do during sex, but Troye's effect on him was quickly changing that idea. If that was a good or a bad thing, Tyler didn't know.

"Touch yourself," he whispered, gasping harshly both from the heat of their stare and the strain of his punishing thrusts.

Troye mewled. He reached down to wrap a hand around his own arousal and began pumping it quickly, never breaking eye contact while he panted through his open mouth. Tyler grunted as Troye tightened further around him and dug his fingers into the soft flesh of Troye's thighs.

Tyler watched as Troye closed his eyes and pressed his head back, moaning on every short exhalation of breath as his hand picked up speed. A crease formed between Troye's brows and suddenly he gave a hoarse shout, pressing his head into the bed, hips jerking spasmodically in Tyler's grip. His muscles clamped down hard on Tyler's length and Tyler tilted his head back, clenching his eyes shut as he plunged into the rippling heat a few more times before his climax overcame him.

Tyler's hips lurched forward violently. He moaned throatily as he pulled Troye's quivering body tightly against himself while shaking with release. His length twitched inside Troye's clenching body and Tyler hummed from deep within his chest at every spasm of the tight muscles.

Still moving in gentle rolls of his hips, Tyler slowly came down from his high. He turned his head to nibble carefully at the soft skin of Troye's knee once more, panting in exertion around the flesh while licking it wetly. He watched Troye out of the corner of his eye, seeing him loosen his grip around himself and breathe rapidly through his open mouth while staring up at the ceiling. Troye's hand flopped as if boneless to rest on his chest, which was rising and falling in quick movements and stained with his release.

Waiting for his pulse to stop racing, Tyler eventually drew out gently and he heard Troye breathe in deeply through his nose at the pull on his sensitive flesh. Scooting backwards, Tyler let Troye slide off his lap to settle back on the bed. Troye's legs fell from his shoulders, bouncing slightly on the mattress on either side of Tyler's body.

Tyler lifted his eyes to see Troye raise his clean hand to his sweaty fringe. He ran his fingers through it and lifted it away from his forehead before slowly sitting up on his elbows to fix Tyler with his gaze.

"Much better," Troye whispered.

Tyler frowned, confused for a second before he remembered his earlier question that had gone unanswered. The frown fell from his face and he smiled.

"I'm glad I could be of assistance."

Troye blinked slowly, a lazy smile stretching his lips in answer, and Tyler's stomach fluttered strangely as he took in the hazy look of post-coital lethargy in Troye's expression. Troye seemed to have slowly accepted his own desires over the course of the last 12 hours and Tyler was glad that he had come to his senses the night before. The sex had been amazing and Tyler had a worn-out, languid young man resting in front of him as a result.

Smiling wider, Tyler patted Troye's thigh before breaking their stare and shuffling back and off the foot of the bed. "I'm gonna need another shower," he laughed as he bent to pick up his damp towel from the floor.

Tyler took one last look at Troye as he rested unmoving on the bed, his blue eyes half-closed but following Tyler's every movement, before walking out through the door. He turned into the bathroom he'd stepped out of not 40 minutes earlier, removing the condom and throwing it in the trashcan. Not that he minded a nice, hot shower, but Tyler hadn't thought he'd need a second one so soon.

Shaking his head at the thought, Tyler almost laughed as he turned the water on, lifting his hand under the spray to check the temperature. Allowing himself just a quick rinse, Tyler was done after a few short minutes. He didn't bother with covering himself up with the towel when he walked out this time.

As he was about to step back into the bedroom to pick up his clothes, he paused in the doorway, his eyes immediately drawn to the bed and the long-limbed man lying in it.

Troye's eyes were closed, the unguarded peace on his relaxed face making him look even younger than he was, and it seemed as if he hadn't moved at all since Tyler left him there. His breathing was even and slow and Tyler smiled softly as he realized that Troye had fallen asleep.

Stepping carefully over the soft carpet, Tyler walked in and picked up his clothes and glasses, trying not to wake Troye as he stepped into his pants and buttoned them. He glanced at Troye's resting form before pulling the old t-shirt he'd been offered over his head and tugging it down over his torso. Troye had been right; it was a bit tight on him, but Tyler didn't mind.

He looked to the alarm clock beside the bed and sighed when the numbers showed that he had overstayed the allotted time of their arrangement by half an hour already. Tyler needed to get back to his place and get ready for his next appointment.

But when his eyes settled back on Troye's face, he wished for the first time in a long while that he wasn't so busy - that he could stay for a bit longer. And that feeling scared him a little.

Ignoring the way his stomach squeezed, Tyler walked silently to the side of the bed. He leaned down and brushed a few stray locks from Troye's forehead, sliding his fingertips over his temple before cupping his jaw. Sweeping his thumb gently over Troye's cheek, Tyler wished that he didn't have to wake him.

The decision was taken from him, however, when Troye stirred slightly, his long lashes fluttering against his cheeks before the startling blue of his eyes met Tyler's.

"Hey, gorgeous," Tyler whispered softly, slowly removing his hand from Troye's face and letting it fall to the mattress. "I'm sorry to leave you like this but I need to head out."

Troye seemed to become more alert at this, his eyes darting down to take in Tyler's state of dress. A crease formed on his brow and he reached for the tangled bed sheets, covering himself modestly before he lifted his eyes back to Tyler.

"Oh," Troye breathed, rubbing his eyes. "I'll, um... I'll walk you to the door." Troye's words were mumbled and he began to sit up.

Tyler quickly placed his hand on Troye's shoulder and gently pushed him back on the bed, smiling at his confused expression. "You stay here and rest. I can find my way out."

He paused, carefully considering what to say next. The unsettling feeling in his belly only intensified as he studied Troye's face and Tyler knew that he needed to leave before he said something stupid, like offering to pay him another visit tomorrow. Instead, Tyler plastered a smirk onto his face and leaned away from the bed.

"Thank you for the t-shirt. And for last night. And for this morning," he drawled, fighting to keep his expression humorous.

Troye blinked up at him and nodded slowly. "Yeah... Thank you too, I guess," he replied hesitantly, making his words sound almost like a question.

Tyler stepped back and could practically feel Troye's gaze as a physical touch on his back as he turned and went to pick up his button-up shirt. Looking back at Troye over his shoulder, his smirk softened into a smile. Despite his unease, Tyler somehow felt like it was essential that he didn't leave with a 'good bye'.

"I'll see you around, Troye," he said softly before turning and walking out of Troye's apartment.

-


	6. Wake Up Messed Up But You're Still Happy As Can Be

-

Troye heard the front door slam shut out in the hallway. He sighed and lifted himself up to rest on his elbows. Something about Tyler had seemed so strange just now, almost as if he couldn’t get out of there fast enough. The smile on his face hadn’t quite reached his blue eyes and they too had carried a weird glimmer of hesitation.

“Bye, Tyler,” Troye whispered to his empty apartment, not knowing quite what to think about what had just happened.

After he had been so rudely woken up by the phone earlier that morning, he’d thought that he and Tyler would have more time to talk. Perhaps share breakfast together, even if all he had to offer was toasted white bread fresh from the freezer. And coffee.

He didn’t know what he’d wanted them to talk about, but it had somehow felt important that they did. After all, this was his first time bringing home a ‘professional one-night stand’, as Tyler had phrased it. Troye wasn’t sure how these things went or how he should act around Tyler in the aftermath of what they’d done. What to expect. He hadn’t really thought that far when he’d taken Tyler home with him. Tyler was the one who did this regularly and Troye had been left to follow his cue on what to do.

Only, Tyler had been strangely avoiding conversation, other than when he’d complimented Troye’s hair in the kitchen. Then while Troye was trying to think of something to say, Tyler had left for the shower.

What they’d done after that had been nothing close to talking. When Tyler had stepped into the bedroom, looking quite literally like a wet dream, Troye hadn’t really been that eager to talk anyway. So instead, he’d done the next best thing – or perhaps the first best thing – and quite gladly accepted the offer of another round.

Troye blushed as he thought about what they’d done in the bed he was still laying in. Even if he hadn’t really known what to say earlier, he’d at least wanted to have the chance to tell Tyler how much he’d enjoyed himself. How Tyler had brought out a side of him that he hadn’t even known existed before last night. With all the previous guys Troye had hooked up with, even if it was for more than just one time, he’d never been as unreserved, as care-free as he’d been with Tyler. Or ever felt as secure. Maybe Troye would have even wanted to thank Tyler for that.

He shook his head and shuffled out from the sheets, walking slowly towards the bathroom. Now that Tyler had practically ran out of his apartment, Troye would never get the chance to let him know either of those things.

He walked into the bathroom and turned on the lights. Immediately catching sight of the reflection of his own face in the mirror, Troye stilled, idly taking in his blank expression. His eyes were a bit puffy from sleep, or lack thereof, and his hair was a mess. As he slowly trailed his gaze down his mirror image, he saw small, purpling bruises scattered over his lower neck, as well as a much larger one covering a good portion of his right shoulder.

Lifting his hand, he poked carefully at the dark red marks lining the bruise and hissed when a flash of pain shot through his flesh. Good thing it would be easily covered by the collar of a shirt, or Troye would never get Caspar off his back on Monday.

Troye snorted and turned toward the shower, turning on the spray.

Caspar. He’d been the culprit behind all this, as well as the phone call that had woken them up earlier. Not feeling particularly enthusiastic about having the conversation Troye knew was waiting for him on the other end of the line, he had promptly shut off his phone after that second missed call. At least it had gotten him out of bed. Perhaps he should be grateful or Tyler and he might have still been sleeping.

Quickly rinsing away the evidence of his earlier activities, Troye was done with his second shower in no-time, not bothering with washing his hair again. After relocating his clothes on the bedroom floor and putting them on, he walked out into the living room again, not sure what to do next.

Maybe he should actually have some breakfast. The last meal he’d had was after all the dinner served at the benefit last night, which was hours and hours ago. His stomach chose this exact moment to make itself known by rumbling in protest from the lack of sustenance in his system.

He was just on his way towards the kitchen when something caught his eye on the couch. In a loosely tangled pile on one of the seats lay a dark gray neck tie, almost black in color, but not quite. Troye stilled. That wasn’t his tie. It was Tyler’s.

Troye’s stomach squeezed uncomfortably and he walked over slowly to pick it up, stroking the fine silk with his thumb. Tyler must have forgotten it there in his haste to leave. Troye stared at the thin strip of fabric in his right hand while running its length with his left, lifting the end tail and turning it over to peer at the label curiously. Givenchy. Troye didn’t know much about designer clothing but he understood that this tie probably wasn’t cheap. He could feel it in the softness of the silky surface. He hoped Tyler wouldn’t miss it too much once he realized he’d left it behind. Troye smiled slightly. Or perhaps he’d miss it enough to come back for it.

Sighing harshly in frustration at himself and the lost-puppy act that he was letting himself be immersed in, Troye coiled the tie quickly around his hand and walked over to his bookshelf. He plopped the rolled up tie on one of the shelves where random knick knacks littered the surface and promptly turned to continue his way to the kitchen.

When he turned the corner and saw the coffee machine and the two used mugs that sat beside it on the counter, he pushed back against the strange wave of regret that overcame him and quickly walked over to lift the mugs into the sink. It wasn’t regret in the sense that he wanted the events of the previous 12 hours undone, but regret in the sense that he wished they’d had more time. And it wasn’t a feeling that Troye was used to or comfortable with in any way.

Yet, it still simmered inside him over the course of the next two days and Troye had never before welcomed the boring normality of work more than he did that following Monday morning, even if it did mean facing a certain friend and his questions.

-x-

Keeping his eyes firmly on the desk in front of him, Troye sat down heavily in the swivel chair in his booth with a huff. He reached up to boot up the desktop computer and, as it whirred to life with a hum from the fan, he shuffled through the pile of papers on his desk, trying to sort out where to begin.

The sound of a throat clearing reached his ears from across the little aisle between his booth and the one facing it, but he kept his head down, pointedly ignoring it.

A few seconds ticked by in silence before another, more persistent cough had Troye sighing and lifting his head, staring straight ahead at the screen that had lit up in front of him.

“What do you want, Caspar?” he urged, filling his voice with exasperation. He knew perfectly well what his friend wanted, of course, but he’d be damned if he was the one to bring it up.

A chuckle sounded from the opposite booth before Caspar spoke up. “I just wanted to know if you had a good weekend,” he said in feigned innocence. “Did you?”

Troye bent his head back down and quickly typed in his password to enter the operation system on his computer, muttering under his breath, “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“I kept calling you but all I got was your voicemail,” Caspar continued casually, as if he hadn’t heard him. “Did you turn off your phone?”

“I just didn’t feel like talking,” Troye answered, louder this time.

“Now why would that be, I wonder…” Caspar trailed off. Troye rolled his eyes at the animated suspicion in his friend’s voice and he could almost see Caspar stroking his chin in thought through the back of his head.

“Could you have been busy doing something else, perhaps?”

“No,” Troye answered shortly, perhaps a bit too quickly as there was a sudden gasp from the other booth.

“Don’t tell me you two were at it when I called!”

“No!” Troye said firmly as he whirred around to finally look at Caspar across the aisle with a frown on his face. Caspar was staring at him wide eyed and had a hand clasped to his chest as if in shock. Troye narrowed his eyes at his friend’s little act before adding, “I was sleeping the first time you called.”

“Alone?” Caspar prompted gently, leaning forward in his seat slightly in interest.

Troye felt himself blush and couldn’t do anything to stop it. He let the question hang between them for a moment before taking a deep breath and lowering his eyes to the floor at his feet, not sure why he was even considering letting Caspar know what had happened.

“No…” he admitted so quietly that he wasn’t sure if the other man had heard him. He didn’t have to wonder long though, since an earsplitting ‘whoop’ had him snapping his attention back to Caspar, who sat up in his chair with his arms raised to hold his fisted hands stretched above his head, a wide grin covering his face.

Quickly glancing around in fear that the loud noise had brought unwanted attention from the rest of their colleagues in the open office area, Troye hunched his shoulders and glared at Caspar with a deep frown. 

“Would you quiet down, you fucking idiot?!” he whispered harshly. “This is an office, not a sports bar!”

“I don’t care; you got laid, that’s all that matters!” Caspar replied gleefully and loud enough for his voice to carry at least five booths away in every direction, his arms still pointing straight up as if they were stuck there permanently from now on.

Troye groaned and let his head fall into his hands, covering his face as he felt it heat up further in embarrassment. “For the love of god, stop shouting!” he muttered through the gap between his palms, all thoughts of actually getting to work now abandoned in favor of wishing that Caspar would quit announcing Troye’s private life to all and sunder.

An eerie silence followed his plea and Troye waited for a few moments before peeking out from behind his fingers, his curiosity getting the better of him. His eyes were met by the sight of Caspar rubbing his hands together and grinning like the Cheshire cat, looking like he was about to explode from excitement.

“So he stayed the night?” Caspar asked when he caught Troye looking at him, his voice thankfully much lower in tone this time.

Troye nodded once in reply. Caspar actually clapped his hands then, the perfect picture of an excited teenage fangirl. Troye let out another groan before sitting up and pressing his fingertips into his eyes before lowering them to cross his arms over his chest. He frowned in confusion when

Caspar lifted his eyes to the ceiling and began counting on his fingers. “Let’s see…” he said as if in deep thought. “You left the party at 12, woke up when I called at ten, and then he left at noon?” Caspar looked back down at him with eyebrows raised in question.

Troye shrugged, not sure what he was getting at.

“That gave you time for, what?” Caspar looked down at his hands, wiggling the fingers he had lifted from his palms whilst listing off the time stamps and, seeming to come to a conclusion, he focused back on Troye. “Four rounds?”

Troye’s eyes widened with horror. “No!” he shouted, before ducking his head when he realized that he was the one drawing attention now.

“ _No_ ,” he repeated in a forced whisper and frowned at Caspar while he felt his blush intensify. Caspar was unaffected, however, as he leered back at Troye.

“You keep saying that word, you know. I have a feeling there were a lot more ‘yes’-es when Tyler was with you.” He wiggled his eyebrows and Troye sighed deeply, lifting his gaze heavenward and wishing for inner strength. “So three times, then?” he tried again.

“Stop.”

“Two?”

Troye turned away to face his computer screen without saying a word.

“Well, it doesn’t really matter, I guess,” Caspar continued conversationally. “I’m surprised to see you walking at all, either way.”

Troye wrinkled his nose but didn’t turn around as he pleaded, “Please don’t be disgusting, Caspar.” He ignored the voice at the back of his mind choosing that exact moment to point out just where Tyler’s tongue had been that Saturday morning and tried to focus on the emails on his screen.

Caspar had the audacity to giggle in response. “Okay okay, I’ll stop.” He paused. “Just, speaking of tender arses; will you at least let me know if mine is going to be on display on any notice boards during the day, or am I off the hook?”

Dropping his slightly tense shoulders, Troye picked up a pen and turned his attention to the seemingly endless pile of reports on his desk, slowly shaking his head.

“Fine,” he muttered over his shoulder. “But I don’t want to hear another word about it, okay?”

Another snigger rose from the man sitting in the booth behind him.

“See? I knew you’d like him.”

-x-

It was nearing lunchtime when Troye’s attention on his work load was broken by a female voice speaking from the open side of his booth.

“I’m sorry to bother you, Mr. Mellet, but these arrived for you downstairs.”

Troye lifted his head and turned his seat to look, only to feel his eyes widen in shock when he saw the enormous bouquet of flowers in the hands of Stacey, the department assistant. She peeked out from behind the armful of stems wrapped in silk paper and stepped forward hesitatingly.

Troye shook himself out of his stupor and stood up to relieve Stacey of her burden, which easily covered the entire top half of her short frame. He took the heavy bouquet and placed it gingerly on his desk, trying not to dislodge any of his papers while doing so.

“For me?” he asked, his voice coming out breathy and awestruck. “Did they say who they’re from?” 

Of course, Troye had a sneaking suspicion who would be sending him flowers today of all days, but he was still completely taken aback by the gesture. Understandably so, he argued as he thought back to the forced smirk on Tyler’s face when he left this Saturday. Who’d have thought their encounter would inspire the other man to send him flowers, when they’d barely gotten to know each other at all?

“It came by delivery, but I think there’s a card in there somewhere,” Stacey smiled back at him before turning and disappearing down the aisle, the sound of her heels muffled on the carpeted floor.

Troye’s eyes followed her retreating back for a few seconds before a low whistle made him focus on Caspar, who was sat facing him again, eyeing the bouquet on Troye’s desk.

“Wow,” Caspar said, looking up at Troye in what seemed almost like admiration. “What’d you do to this guy?”

Troye didn’t have time to deny doing anything that would warrant the bouquet before Caspar held up his hands and added, “Actually, I don’t wanna know. Just read the note already.”

Rolling his eyes, Troye turned to look at the flowers again and took a moment to appreciate them. They were a beautiful array of colors and shapes, and Troye had enough knowledge to be able to identify a few proud lilies as well as a scattering of delicate carnations. The sweet smell was almost overwhelming as it filled his small work space.

He took a step forward and lifted the bouquet carefully to search for the card Stacey had mentioned. He paused when he spotted two small white envelopes attached to one of the more sturdy stems.

Frowning in confusion, he reached in to the densely packed flowers and pulled out the envelopes. His frown deepened when he found one marked with his name while the other turned out to be for Caspar. He turned toward the man who was looking at him with an expectant smile.

“Well?” Caspar urged eagerly.

“There’s one for you too, actually.” Troye stepped forward to hand over the envelope marked Caspar to his friend, who took it with a frown of his own.

“That’s weird,” Caspar mumbled before he started opening his note.

Troye placed the flowers back on his desk and carefully ripped the folded top of his envelope open, anxious to see what the note said, his stomach filling with nervous butterflies. He pulled out a plain white card and blushed when he read the sentence written on its surface in blue ink.

_I’m glad you decided to indulge in pleasure, but I can assure you, the pleasure was indeed all mine._

It was signed with a single capital _T_. The butterflies in Troye’s stomach turned from nervous to thrilling, suddenly remembering how Tyler had used the same words when Troye had first opened the door for him that Friday evening.

But before he could linger on it, his thoughts were interrupted by Caspar’s voice.

“Whoa,” was the breathy exclamation to his side and Troye snapped his head up to look at Caspar. The South African was staring wide eyed at the contents of his envelope and if Troye hadn’t been curious before about why Caspar received a message from Tyler, he certainly was now.

“What does it say?” he asked, not even trying to mask the eagerness in his voice.

“It’s a check, Troye,” Caspar replied, all mirth gone from his face as he briefly lifted his gaze to meet Troye’s before looking back down at the slip of paper in his hands. “It’s a check covering the entire fee for the appointment. He says he doesn’t want it.”

Troye’s stomach did a somersault. What?

“Can I see that note?” Troye said hurriedly, reaching out for the card that had come attached to the check and snatching it from Caspar when he handed it over. Troye’s increasing pulse made his hands a bit unsteady as his eyes scanned the words quickly and his breath caught.

_I can’t take your money. In fact, I should be paying you._

“Well, Troye,” Caspar sighed but Troye didn’t look up from the card. “Whatever happened this weekend, it looks like you must have done it right.”

-x-

The rest of the week passed in a sense of slow motion for Troye. Nothing was moving fast enough and nothing seemed to have the power to distract him from his thoughts. And he’d sooner dunk himself in ice cold water than dwell on these specific ones. Because whenever he let his mind wander, it would stray to thoughts of Tyler. Tyler, who had been a onetime thing, a way to ease some deep-seated tension that Troye didn’t know he’d had. Only now, Tyler was causing him even more tension.

It was all Tyler’s fault, Troye argued; not only for putting memories of unadulterated lust in his mind, but for sending him those goddamn flowers along with those ridiculous notes. What had he been trying to accomplish with that, anyway? Why didn’t he want the money? That, specifically, had unsettled Troye more than the flowers.

The more Troye thought about it, even when he tried not to, the angrier he got. He was on edge, irritable, and quick to find his temper, even to the point where Caspar remarked on it.

It didn’t help that Troye had spotted David on his way in that morning, sending a flash of memory through his mind where he heard his own voice say that Tyler was his boyfriend. Troye clenched his fists as well as his jaw, trying not to draw David’s attention while continuing on his way through the lobby, head bowed.

Then, when Caspar pointed out how unusually touchy Troye was being, Troye snapped and yelled at him to get off his back already.

That was Wednesday at lunch and Caspar left a wide berth around him after that. Of course, that only made Troye feel guilty and it didn’t help his mood at all. But the churning in his stomach, the petulance that suddenly consumed him, made him refuse to apologize.

Troye became restless after that, unable to focus on anything for very long. The events of that previous weekend occupied his mind so often that Troye was beginning to get confused about what it was that had him so worked up. Was he angry? Was he offended? Horny?

It was as if Tyler had set off an itch inside his very being. A nagging, irritating itch that he couldn’t define or pinpoint. One that wouldn’t be scratched, no matter how hard he tried.

And oh, had he tried.

Troye never thought he’d find himself a victim to his own hands, in a frenzy to find release from his treacherous mind. Yet there he was, late Thursday night, in the shower, forcing his own fingers inside himself as far as they would go in his desperation to reach the spot where Tyler had touched him so deeply. He didn’t succeed, however, and ended up harshly jerking off with his jaw clenched and breathing raggedly through his teeth, suffering an orgasm tinged with frustration rather than the euphoria he was after.

By the time Friday rolled around Troye was at the end of his rope.

Before Caspar left the office that night, he leaned over to place a post-it note on the desk beside Troye’s elbows where they rested as he held his head in his hands, gripping his hair.

“I knew I kept the number for a reason,” Caspar said in an uncharacteristically soft voice. “Just call him, already.”

Troye glanced at the bright pink post-it when he heard Caspar shuffle away towards the elevators. Still staring at the number scribbled on it, he sat up slowly, letting his hands fall from his rumpled hair into his lap and sighed.

Without giving himself too much time to think about it, he ripped the note from the desk, plucked up his jacket from where it hung over the back of his chair, turned off his computer, and walked out from his booth.

When he got home, he put the post-it on his bookshelf, next to Tyler’s tie, and tried to go on with his weekend like a normal person. He lumbered about his apartment in his sweats and a t-shirt, ate take-out out of the boxes it came in, and watched movies. He absolutely did not glance at the pink slip of paper were it was curling slightly up from the wooden surface to which it was attached every ten minutes…

It was Saturday afternoon when Troye’s resolve finally snapped. He’d been going about his day, doing the dishes, when a soft shuffling noise from behind him made Troye jump and drop the fork he’d been rinsing into the sink with a loud clatter.

He whipped his head around, heart in his throat, when his eyes immediately landed on the slowly wilting bouquet that Tyler had sent him. The lilies had begun to droop and Troye saw one of their large petals lying on the counter top beside the vase. That must have been what had made the noise, Troye reasoned, still staring at the flowers and getting lost in thought once again.

It had been a week. A week since Tyler walked out of his bedroom and his life just as quickly as he’d set foot in it. And despite the laughably short time span that had gone by, Tyler still haunted Troye’s every waking minute, as if mocking him in his weakness.

Enough was enough.

Troye wiped his hands quickly on his dishtowel and practically ran out of the kitchen. He stalked over to his bookshelf and ripped the note from it, already unlocking his phone with his other hand. After filling in the number, he lifted the phone to his ear before he could change his mind. It rang twice before a female voice chirped on the other end of the call.

“Ganymede Escorting Services, how can I help you?”

Troye paused, not sure what to say. He hadn’t exactly known what to expect before making the call, but being greeted by a woman threw him off a bit.

“Oh!” he said when he got his bearings back. “I- I’m sorry, I was looking for Tyler?”

“Your name, sir?”

“Troye, but I-”

“Right, Mr. Mellet!” the girl exclaimed loudly. “Tyler told me all about you! I hope everything was to your satisfaction last Friday? Did you want to make another appointment?”

“Um, what? No, I just-” Troye tried before he was interrupted again.

“I’m looking at Tyler’s calendar now and he’s fully booked for the next five weeks. Shall I put you on the waiting list or would you like me to recommend one of our other talented young men?”

Troye sighed and sat down heavily on one of the sofa cushions, rubbing his eyes. What in the world was he doing?

“Actually, never mind,” he said quietly. There was a short silence before the girl spoke again, softer and sounding almost sympathetic this time.

“I’m sorry, doll. Would you like me to tell him you called?” the girl pried gently. Troye felt like almost like a child being comforted by his mom after having scraped his knees, and all his earlier resolve left him in an instant.

“No, that won’t be necessary. Thank you, ...” he trailed off awkwardly, realizing he didn’t know the girl’s name.

“Becca,” she replied softly.

“Thank you, Becca,” Troye said around a joyless smile and lowered the phone, hanging up the call before letting his head drop back against the backrest.

He closed his eyes and scoffed. What was he thinking? Had he really been thinking at all? Sure, a lot of thoughts had occupied his mind all week, but Troye clearly hadn’t been focusing on the right ones. He’d let himself get distracted by his fascination in a man who’d given him a mere taste of what sex could be like if he let himself go, instead of listening to the logical part of his mind that already knew why trying to get a hold of said man again was a bad idea.

Tyler was an escort. He was at the disposal of everyone who was willing to pay for his company and, at the same time, belonged to no one. A man like him had more experience than Troye could ever dream of, not necessarily regarding sex, but life as a whole. Tyler was confident, poised, and probably had no issues blending in perfectly with the social elite, if his price was anything to go by. In fact, he was most likely used to being spoiled by wealthy old men showering him in gifts. He would have neither the time nor the patience for a confused, grumpy little kid like Troye, who had nothing to offer. Not even the money required for Tyler’s highly sought company.

Troye might as well try to move on with his life. Maybe someday he’d find someone who piqued his interest just as much as Tyler had. Someone Troye could actually let himself get distracted by without feeling like it was a useless waste of time. Perhaps someone he could eventually call his.

Groaning in annoyance that he’d let it get this point before realizing the futileness of his longing, Troye sat up and rose from his seat. Because that’s what it was, he understood that now; longing. He’d longed for a chance to see Tyler again this whole past week and Troye hadn’t been self-aware enough to stop it before he sank so low as to actually consider asking an escort if he was up for another meeting.

He vowed to not give even a second more of his time to thinking about it and set off into the kitchen again to finish his dishes. When he got there, he stilled as soon as he saw the flowers sitting on his counter. No, not a second more, he thought to himself and stomped over to grab the stems from the vase before turning to shove them into the trash. They were wilting anyway.

Troye closed the lid with a loud clang and felt better instantly. He turned towards his radio and, turning the volume up high, he grabbed the vase and poured the lightly colored water out in the sink. 

Then he set about washing it thoroughly along with his other dishes and soon enough, he sang along to the pop songs blaring out of the speakers at the top of his lungs, drowning out any distraction with a bass that was making his cabinets rattle.

With his track record, Troye should have known that wasn’t the end of it.

It was nearing ten pm that same night, just when he was settling in on his couch and about to watch a movie with snacks at the ready, that his phone started ringing. He rolled his eyes, thinking that it was probably an already inebriated Caspar about to beg Troye to come join him in some stuffy club for a drink or ten.

But when he picked up his phone, the number on the display wasn’t one he knew or recognized. He hesitated momentarily before accepting the call and raising the phone to his ear.

“Hello?” he asked carefully, just to feel his breath catch when a familiar voice reached his ear.

“I’ve been told you called and asked for me earlier,” Tyler drawled and Troye felt the hair rise on the back of his neck at the lustful tone in his voice. “Was there something you wanted?”

Only when Tyler was done speaking did Troye remember to breathe and he inhaled deeply, trying to steady his racing heart. He sat up straight, no longer able to relax back into his seat. Why was Tyler calling him? And this late on a Saturday? Wouldn’t he be busy with a client? Perhaps he was, and was calling Troye from the bathroom or something.

“Oh, um… Hi!” Troye replied, trying to sound casual and carefree. “No, uh, I mean… I clicked the wrong contact on Caspar’s phone earlier. Just a misdial, that’s all.” Troye was quite surprised at how easily the lie rolled off his tongue.

“Really?” Tyler laughed from his end of the call. “How come you’re answering Caspar’s phone? Because I’m calling the number Becca gave me from her caller-ID.”

Troye felt his heart beat speed up again at being caught so quickly in the lie. “Um, he gave it to me… for safe keeping?” Troye cringed at the stupid answer that his mouth sprouted before he could stop it. Tyler’s rich laugh filled his ear again and Troye could feel his face heat up in embarrassment.

“So there really wasn’t anything you wanted from me?” Tyler asked again instead of calling him out on his fib. Troye shrugged his shoulders, as if Tyler would be able to see him.

“Nope, honest mistake,” Troye ignored the way his voice was tinged with feigned innocence.

Tyler hummed in response. “Well, in that case I don’t suppose you’ll want to answer your door?”

Before Troye had time to process the words, a soft knocking came from his hallway and he whipped his head around so fast he almost dropped his phone, his heart thumping in his ribcage.

Tyler was there. The man Troye had been obsessing about was standing outside his door right at this very moment.

“Troye?” Tyler asked in a slightly hesitant voice a couple of seconds later and Troye realized he had yet to give any type of response. He scrambled off the couch and walked quickly out into the hallway, taking a deep breath while unlocking and opening the front door.

The first thing he noticed was the black leather jacket that Tyler was wearing before looking up to meet his laughing eyes. Tyler still held his phone to his ear, just like Troye.

“Hey, gorgeous,” Tyler smiled at him.

Troye released his breath on a shaky exhalation and whispered, “Hi.”

Tyler’s smile widened. “Are you gonna invite me in?” His voice came from two different directions due to their call still being connected and Troye stepped back from the door to let Tyler in while lowering his phone, leaving his arm to hang by his side.

Tyler hung up the call and walked inside, slowly closing the door behind him, all the while keeping his gaze locked with Troye’s. Troye walked backwards a few steps to give Tyler room. “What are you doing here?” he asked, his voice a bit steadier now.

Tyler pocketed his phone and his smile turned into a smirk. “There must have been a reason you called the agency earlier. I figured I’d come see for myself what that reason might be,” he drawled and started taking small steps towards Troye, reminiscent of a cat stalking it’s pray.

Swallowing with difficulty, Troye decided to dodge the unspoken question in Tyler’s words, since it was pretty obvious that Tyler knew exactly what Troye had wanted without him having to say it out loud.

“What about your client?” he asked instead. “I thought you were busy for the next five weeks?”

Tyler was almost close enough now for Troye to feel the heat coming off his body and he watched as Tyler wrinkled his nose before answering.

“I left early. They were passed out drunk anyway and I’m not paid to babysit grown men who can’t handle their liquor.” Tyler stepped into Troye’s personal space and bit his lip while looking down at their feet only to trail his eyes slowly back up Troye’s body. “Besides, the chance of spending another night with you sounded much more appealing,” he added when he met Troye’s eyes again.

While his heart sped up at the hot gaze Tyler had trained on him, Troye hesitated at the mention of a fee. “I don’t have the money for this, Tyler,” he whispered, only to gasp and close his eyes when Tyler leaned forward to breathe his answer across Troye’s neck.

“Then I guess this one’s on me.” Tyler took one final step to press their bodies together and closed his mouth over the side of Troye’s neck, carefully kissing the skin that was currently covered in goose bumps.

Troye’s hands immediately went up into Tyler’s hair and he tilted his head back to give the other man unhindered access. He moaned when he felt Tyler’s tongue come out to lick his pulse point before sucking the skin into his mouth lightly, both hearing and feeling Tyler hum deep in his chest in response to Troye’s quick surrender.

Tyler’s lips worked their way over Troye’s skin with sucking kisses as he shrugged out of his jacket and started walking Troye backwards toward his bedroom. The fact that he didn’t need to look up to see where they were going sent a thrill through Troye’s body and he reached down to tug at his own jumper. Tyler leaned back momentarily when he lifted it over his head, looking their gazes. They had reached the dimly lit hallway just outside the door to the bedroom and Troye felt a warmth rise in his chest.

Tyler was really there, in the flesh, and Troye relished in the knowledge that his week of frustration was over.

Suddenly eager to touch bare skin, Troye reached forward to work on the buttons on Tyler’s shirt and released a shaky breath when he felt Tyler’s hands wrap around his hips, tugging on his sweatpants and pushing them down. Troye walked backwards into his bedroom and stepped gingerly out of his pants as they fell on the way.

They were standing at the foot of his bed when Troye finally got all the buttons of the shirt open. He reached up to splay his hands on Tyler’s chest, smoothing them up and over his shoulders, pushing the shirt down Tyler’s strong arms. Tyler tightened his grip on Troye’s lower back and leaned in to lick at his collarbone while pressing their naked chests together.

Troye let out a groan when his hardened nipples brushed against Tyler’s warm skin and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. Their chests moved in time with the steadily increasing speed of their breathing and Tyler nibbled his way up Troye’s neck to suck on his earlobe while they held each other.

Tyler’s hands slid down his back to settle just above his buttocks and pulled his hips forward, moaning into Troye’s ear when their arousals came into contact through the layers of fabric still between them.

The heat of their embrace was almost burning and Troye whimpered as he rolled his hips into Tyler’s. He leaned his head against his own arm where it rested on Tyler’s shoulder and panted into the space created between his upper arm and the top of Tyler’s chest.

His breath stuttered when Tyler pulled Troye even harder against himself, Tyler’s hands sliding down further to grip his ass tightly as he began timing their movements until they were practically rutting against each other. Tyler’s lips had found the sensitive skin just behind Troye’s ear and Troye mewled when teeth scraped against it momentarily before Tyler moved on to suck at the skin just underneath the spot.

Troye lifted his head as Tyler moved to the front of his throat, licking at the hollow there and beginning a trek down to his sternum, slowly bending at the waist as he moved lower. Tyler’s hands kept kneading Troye’s ass while he kissed his way down over his stomach and settled on his knees at Troye’s feet. He dipped his fingertips inside the elastic of his boxers and pulled them down, immediately catching the tip of Troye’s hard length in his mouth as it sprang free.

Moaning loudly, Troye lifted his hands from Tyler’s shoulders to twist them in his blond hair and threw his head back as wet heat surrounded him. Tyler’s mouth descended on his erection and when Troye felt the tip nudge the back of his throat, Tyler backed off just as slowly again. His ever-moving tongue made his lips disconnect from Troye’s skin every now and then, resulting in obscene slurping noises echoing throughout the room.

When Tyler had just the tip left in his mouth, he began pushing Troye in again with the help of his hands, only this time he didn’t stop when he reached his throat. Instead, Tyler pushed Troye’s length further in, not stopping until his lips where wrapped around the very base as far as he could go. 

Troye gasped, leaning on his hands and gripping Tyler’s hair. He whimpered as his knees almost gave out when the other man swallowed around him, making his throat ripple and close tightly around Troye’s length. Tyler pulled back quickly to draw a deep breath before repeating the process. Troye’s legs were shaking and he choked on his breath when Tyler’s finger’s slipped further into the crevice between his buttocks. Familiar warmth began to pool in his belly.

“Ty-Tyler,” he gasped in warning when one of Tyler’s fingertips pressed against his entrance, his hands tugging on Tyler’s hair as he felt his climax build up. “I’m close.”

Tyler only moaned in response and lifted one of his hands while he backed off Troye’s length to quickly wet a finger before taking him into his mouth again. Tyler’s finger returned to Troye’s opening and pressed it inside carefully.

Troye moaned and looked down to see Tyler’s lips envelop him as he panted through his open mouth. The finger sheathed inside of him curled to press against his prostate just as Tyler swallowed once more and that was all it took for Troye to come with a blinding speed.

He shouted his completion, closing his eyes tightly as he felt his muscles contract and tingle with exhilarating pleasure. His hips jerked and his length jumped inside Tyler’s throat, where Tyler’s continuous swallowing milked him of his release. Tyler wiggled his finger, making Troye draw short, stuttering breaths at every brush against the bundle of nerves inside him, heightening his orgasm further.

Tyler swallowed one last time before slowly dragging his mouth up and off Troye’s over-sensitized length and Troye was left shaking violently as he tried to remain standing on his unsteady legs, still leaning on Tyler for support.

Tyler’s finger slipped out carefully before his hands wrapped around Troye’s hips, holding him steady as he began to pull Troye down to rest on his knees on the floor in front of him.

Troye was still trying to catch his breath when he settled there, his hands resting on Tyler’s shoulders, and blinked a few times before he could focus on Tyler’s darkened gaze.

“Stay there,” was Tyler’s short instruction, his voice hoarse and gravelly from the strain he’d put on his throat, before he stood up and walked out into the living room.

Troye nodded limply and pushed his sweat soaked hair from his forehead with a shaking hand, drawing a few deep breaths as he waited for Tyler to return.

Just a few moments later, Tyler was back, in the process of rolling a condom onto his prominent erection, and striding over to the bedside table to quickly measure out a dollop of lube into his palm. He turned, stroking the slick substance over his length while his lust-blown eyes focused on Troye. 

Troye gulped as he held Tyler’s gaze while he walked closer, turning his face forward again when Tyler stepped around to settle down on his knees behind him. He pushed Troye’s feet apart to fit in between his legs before one of his hands came up to press on his shoulder, silently telling Troye to lean forward on his hands.

Troye felt his face flush with heat when realization dawned on him that he was currently resting on all fours on his bedroom floor, bent over and more than ready for Tyler to do what he pleased to his trembling body.

Tyler’s left hand gripped his hipbone while he moved closer and placed the slick tip of his erection against Troye’s entrance. Troye let out a tiny moan and closed his eyes in anticipation, knowing that this was going to burn since Tyler hadn’t prepared him properly.

The thought sent an unexpected tingle down his spine, one that Troye didn’t have time to explore further before Tyler spoke up from behind him, his voice deep and breathy with arousal.

“Better find something to hold onto, Troye, because I’ve been thinking about doing this all week and I’m about to fuck you senseless.”

A whimper was all Troye managed in response before the blunt head of Tyler’s length began to breach him. Troye sucked in his breath and blinked rapidly as the sudden wide stretch made his eyes water. He closed his eyes and forced his muscles to relax, groaning as he pushed back against Tyler, making him quickly sink deeper in.

This was what he’d been longing for; the sensation of absolute fullness and being claimed by Tyler’s demanding presence inside of him. Troye groaned, his head falling forward when Tyler stilled, already in to the hilt of his erection.

Troye could hear Tyler’s harsh breathing behind him as he waited there for just a moment, but not giving Troye time to adjust to his size before pulling back and thrusting in again. Troye cried out and sank his fingers into the carpet, digging into the soft fibers in an attempt to find purchase as his knees slid forward slightly from the force. Tyler groaned as Troye felt his muscles clamp down around the invasion of his body.

Readjusting his grip on Troye’s hips, Tyler soon began to find a rhythm to his punishing thrusts and Troye moaned weakly every time the tip of Tyler’s length reclaimed the spot that he had so desperately needed touched again.

The burning friction of Tyler’s thickness consistently pushing and pulling through the rim of his opening was starting to merge with the beginnings of a similar burning on the skin of Troye’s knees, creating a heady mixture of pleasure and pain. Troye’s moans were echoed by Tyler’s answering grunts and Troye lost himself to the raw sensations of once again relinquishing control to Tyler’s capable hands.

It wasn’t long before one of said hands slid their way to his front, reaching down between his legs to wrap around the length of his own member.

Troye groaned, surprised to find himself hard so shortly after his previous climax. The precome leaking from his slit eased the movements of Tyler’s fingers as they created a tight funnel around the ridged head of his swollen flesh. He began whimpering then, the stimulation of Tyler’s hand combined with his unrelenting thrusts quickly setting off the build-up of a second orgasm in his loins.

Tyler seemed to understand Troye’s desperate noises. He bent over his back, the hand holding Troye’s hip keeping him balanced as his pelvis rolled in steady jabs, sending his erection even deeper inside of Troye on every forward thrust.

Tyler licked the shell of Troye’s ear, his warm breath washing over his skin as he whispered, “That’s it, baby. Come for me.”

Troye felt his muscles clench tightly as the words coaxed piercing shards of pleasure to the forefront of his mind and with one final tug on his pulsing length, Tyler sent him over the edge and into the numbing oblivion of climax.

Blood roared in his ears, almost drowning out his own gasping moans that were quickly followed by a throaty groan as Tyler’s hips stuttered in their movements. He plunged deeply into Troye’s shaking body as his length twitched with his release.

Troye’s trembling arms wobbled and gave out under their combined weight, making them tumble to the floor in a heap of shaking limbs. Tyler still held his hips tightly against his own, remaining inside him as he rolled them over onto their sides. They rested there for while, panting heavily, Troye distantly noting Tyler’s breath continually hitting the back of his neck.

Almost beginning to dose off as his tired muscles, as well as his tired mind, found relaxation at last, Troye opened his eyes and gasped when Tyler held him in place while carefully withdrawing from his body in one smooth movement.

Tyler must have noticed how Troye stiffened under his hands, because he leaned in to plant lingering kisses on the nape of Troye’s neck. “I’m sorry,” he murmured against his skin and Troye sighed at the soft touch of his lips to his skin.

“For what?” Troye whispered back, letting his eyes fall shut again.

“I didn’t mean to be so rough,” Tyler replied and paused momentarily before resuming the kisses. “No, that’s a lie. What I meant was; I hope I didn’t hurt you.”

Troye found himself smiling softly and reached up and over his shoulder to run his fingers through Tyler’s hair. “Never apologize for making anyone feel that good, Tyler,” he said reassuringly, patting the back of his head gently before rolling away from Tyler’s touch and lifting up on his still slightly unsteady hands.

He heard Tyler snigger beside him as he stood, probably reminiscent of a newborn colt on his shaky legs, only to collapse back on the foot of the bed and haphazardly pull the blanket he kept there over his shivering body. He sighed in relaxation and turned his head slightly to watch through his lower eyelashes as Tyler disposed of the condom and stood up gingerly.

Troye’s eyes roamed unabashedly over Tyler’s naked body as he lifted his arms up over his head and stretched his muscles, a few deep popping noises accompanying his languid groan when a few of his joints settled into place.

As Tyler bent back over to reach for his clothes, Troye realized he wasn’t going to stay the night. The thought didn’t bother Troye as much as the fact that he still needed answers to some of the questions that had been bouncing around in his head all week. He decided that now was the time to voice them, before Tyler could leave with more questions in his wake.

“Why the flowers?” Troye asked quietly and watched as Tyler paused for a second before continuing to pull on his boxers.

“Did you not like them?” Tyler glanced at him as he began stepping into his pants, looking down when he closed them at the front.

“I did, but it messed with my head a bit,” Troye lied. It hadn’t just been a bit, but he wasn’t about to let Tyler know that.

A small frown formed on Tyler’s face. “I’m sorry, Troye, that wasn’t my intention,” he said as he met Troye’s gaze again. “I just wanted to make sure that you didn’t think it was your fault I left so quickly last time. I really did have to get home.”

Troye hummed quietly in response and sat up, pulling at the braided ends of his blanket in thought before braving the next question. “Why did you give Caspar his money back?” he whispered and lifted his eyes to watch in fascination as a blush suddenly found its way to Tyler’s cheeks while he pulled on his shirt, refusing to meet his eyes.

There was a moment of silence before Tyler mumbled a response. “I said why in the note.”

“No, you didn’t,” Troye pointed out quickly. “You just said that you should be the one paying him. Why did you say that, Tyler?” Troye knew he was repeating himself, but he couldn’t help that Tyler had turned out to be someone who inspired a lot of ‘why’-s.

Tyler fumbled with his buttons and sighed deeply. “Because guys like you are rare, okay?” Tyler’s voice was louder this time, sounding almost angry since he was probably fully aware of his blush. “I just… It didn’t feel right to take Caspar’s money. I don’t know what else to tell you.”

Troye didn’t flinch at the harsh tone, since he knew Tyler didn’t mean it that way. He just kept calmly studying Tyler’s gradually reddening face and decided he wouldn’t press the issue. Tyler’s words and the swoop in his stomach that followed them was enough of an answer for now and he smiled at how oddly adorable Tyler was when he was flustered like this; a total opposite to the sexual predator that had given Troye’s knees some very nice rug burns not ten minutes ago.

Taking pity on the man still fighting with his shirt buttons, Troye wrapped the blanket around his waist and rose from his seat. He stepped forward to cover Tyler’s hands with his own. Tyler stilled but didn’t look up.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Troye murmured gently. “I actually wanted to ask if you maybe wanted to do this again some time?”

Tyler finally lifted his eyes to meet Troye’s. “Well,” he began slowly, looking to the side quickly before returning his gaze to Troye’s face. “I do have a night off next week… What are you doing on Thursday?”

Troye felt his smile widen into a cheeky grin. “You?”

Tyler seemed momentarily taken aback by Troye’s easy joke, but the twinkling humor returned to his eyes as he laughed and nodded. “Sounds great,” he chuckled happily before grabbing Troye’s wrists and stepping closer to peck him on the cheek, leaving Troye slightly stunned by the gesture.

Tyler fixed him with one of his smirks when he leaned back and Troye was happy to see Tyler’s confidence return while he purred, “See you then, Troye.”

Troye nodded slowly and followed Tyler with his gaze as he walked out of the bedroom and left Troye’s apartment once again. Only this time, there was a smile on Troye’s face as he watched Tyler go.

-x-

There was an undeniable bounce in his steps as Troye walked into his office booth that following Monday, but he neither cared nor bothered to try to hide it. He swept his jacket off in a flourish and hung it on the back of his chair before plopping himself down on the seat, spinning around to boot up his desktop computer.

Troye could feel Caspar’s pointed stare at the back of his head but continued to ignore his friend as he began sorting through his papers as usual. The pile seemed less daunting today than it had just a week ago and Troye felt a smile stretch his lips, because he knew very well why that was.

Caspar had apparently reached the end of what little control he had on his curiosity and piped up from across the aisle.

“So, had a good weekend?”

Troye’s didn’t look up from his paperwork as he answered with a simple, “Yup,” popping the ‘p’ at the end. He could see Caspar practically squirming in his seat from the corner of his eye.

“And did it include any… oh, I don’t know… Charming, blond men carrying a name beginning with ‘T’ and ending with ‘-yler’?”

The smile on Troye’s face widened and he turned to send Caspar a wink.

“Yup,” he answered again, once more popping the last consonant of the short word, before turning back to face his desk.

When the loud ‘whoop’ sounded from Caspar’s booth this time around, Troye threw his head back and laughed.

-


	7. I Just Wanna Feel Your Lips Against My Skin

-

“Thank you for lunch, Tom,” Tyler smiled as he stood to push his chair back in under the small table covered in a white linen cloth.

He stood waiting to the side while watching the still seated man sign their tab with a quick twirling motion of the ballpoint pen he was holding. Tom, one of Tyler’s regulars and one of the few he genuinely enjoyed the company of, glanced up at him before closing the small black binder in his hands. The corners of Tom’s lips lifted into a smile that lit up his friendly face.

“In a hurry, are we, Tyler?” Tom asked as he too stood up and buttoned his jacket at the waist, gesturing for Tyler to lead the way through the busy restaurant.

The country clubs main dining room was always abuzz with affluent patrons this time of day and the tables were filled with men and women taking a break from business to enjoy a nice lunch. Warm sunlight bathed the room thanks to the large windows facing the grand golf course beyond the back terrace and, despite the strict dress code and posh feel to the place, Tyler always found the atmosphere quite relaxing. There were, of course, always those who had their noses turned up in belief of having a higher standing than others, but they were easily ignored when the rest of the guests were quite down to earth.

Tom was one of the latter – you would never guess he was a man of wealth unless you had an eye for the tailored cut of his clothes and the carefully measured way in which he moved and spoke that often accompanied people born into money.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to rush. Just looking forward to tonight,” Tyler admitted as they reached the reception area, which was filled with people towing huge golf bags, lining up to sign in for a round on the course. He knew he was blatantly fishing for Tom to ask for more information by letting that little tidbit slip but he couldn’t help it. He was almost giddy with excitement, ridiculous as it was.

“Ooh,” Tom cooed around a smirk. “Got a hot date?”

An image of Troye naked and panting beneath him flashed through Tyler’s mind and he smiled gently at the resulting stirring in his lower belly.

“I guess you could say that,” he chuckled and looked down at his shoes as they walked out of the front entrance and started to cross the graveled driveway towards their cars.

“Is it someone I know?” Tom drawled, winking suggestively when Tyler glanced up at him.

Tyler laughed and rolled his eyes, once again glad that Tom was someone he could banter freely with about his occupation. “He might be a bit young for you, Tommy, no offence,” he mocked smilingly, letting the nickname slip to show he didn’t mean any harm with his teasing words.

Tom laughed and patted Tyler’s shoulder. “None taken, Ty, none taken. This old fart knows he’s seen the best of his years come and go.”

“You are not old, Tom,” Tyler admonished gently. “Besides, I hear that your forties are when life really begins!”

“And yet here I am, 8 years after my fortieth birthday, still waiting!” Tom laughed and Tyler couldn’t help but join him, amused by the way Tom always kept a healthy amount of self-distance. It was probably a big part of why Tyler found it so comfortable to be around him.

Tyler considered Tom more of a friend than a client, even if they had taken things further than talking on more than one occasion in the past. There was nothing, in lack of a better word, ‘wrong’ with Tom to warrant his calling on Tyler’s services; quite the opposite actually. He was rather good-looking with his warm, honey colored eyes, an easy charm and a bright smile. Tyler certainly found him attractive enough.

But Tom was part of a generation who were brought up in a time when one’s homosexuality was something to keep hidden and as a result, he didn’t feel comfortable enough to pursue men in the traditional way. And although the social circles he frequented had their fair share of gay men, Tom had never seemed able to find someone who matched his personality. Either they were too flamboyant, or too boring, was what he’d told Tyler. And thus, he’d turned to the escort agency a couple of years back, asking for company for one night. Tyler was glad he was the one who’d ended up getting the booking, since Tom had turned out to be someone he could trust ever since.

Despite how close they’d grown over the years, Tom always went through the agency when booking Tyler for a new appointment. He always insisted on paying as well, not only the full fee with a big tip, but also for anything that carried a cost when they met. Tyler had stopped protesting long ago when Tom paid for their meals and such, knowing that he’d only be met with stubborn hushing and gentle reprimands about just accepting the gifts Tom wanted Tyler to have.

“So, is he cute?” Tom pried gently after they’d fallen into a brief, comfortable silence. Tyler could feel himself flush, making Tom chuckle softly by his side. “And judging by your eagerness to get going, plus that very fetching blush of yours, I’m assuming this guy might be more than just a random client. Am I right?”

Tyler shrugged his shoulders while stuffing his hands in his pants pockets, trying and failing to keep the reddening of his cheeks from intensifying. “I don’t know,” he answered hesitantly. “You know I try to avoid the whole ‘growing attached’-thing like the pneumonic plague, Tom. One exception being you, of course,” Tyler added quickly before he let a small smile play on his lips. “But yeah, he’s cute.”

He looked over at Tom and caught a knowing grin on the older man’s face as he hummed gently in response and nodded.

“Okay. I promise I won’t be a meddling old queen about it if you promise to let me know more next time. Deal?” Tom grinned back at him.

Tyler rolled his eyes again but couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him, shaking his head in defeat. “Deal,” he smiled back. They’d reached their cars and Tyler was fishing out his keys. “It was really nice seeing you again, Tom, as always.”

“You too, Tyler. Now give me some sugar,” Tom smiled and tilted his cheek towards Tyler while pointing at it. Tyler laughed and leaned in to land a quick peck on Tom’s cheek before turning and walking in beside his car. He unlocked it and looked back at Tom over the roof of his red compact.

“Don’t be a stranger!” Tyler said with a wave of his hand as he opened the door to step in and plop down in the seat.

“Be safe, Tyler!” he heard Tom call out after him before he closed the door and turned the key in the ignition, putting the gear in reverse and pulling out of the parking spot.

As he was driving home, Tyler’s thoughts drifted quite predictably back to Troye. His heart started beating a bit faster when he thought about their agreed meeting later that night. Tyler knew he was going against, not only his own, but also the agency’s reservations about seeing clients outside of work by continuing to meet with Troye. And he was ignoring his own warnings about distance by allowing himself to get excited about it. But even if he’d been unsettled when he left Troye’s place that first Saturday, frightened by the feelings of regret that overcame him, Tyler had felt even worse after.

Thoughts of Troye had been clouding his mind the rest of that weekend, making him lose focus on his clients. During those two short days, Tyler was constantly brought back to the look on Troye’s face when Tyler announced his departure. For a fleeting moment, he thought he’d seen disappointment flicker in those beautiful eyes, only to be replaced by blinking surprise. It might have been the light, or even Tyler’s imagination, but that brief look of rejection had bothered him to the point of feeling guilty. So when Monday came, Tyler had gone out looking for a flower shop to have a bouquet delivered.

He’d gone for the most lavish arrangement they offered and only hesitated for a second before writing out the check to Caspar to go with the cards he’d attached. Of course he’d considered what Troye’s reaction would be but it only seemed fair that Caspar shouldn’t have to pay for giving Tyler the chance to meet Troye. Like Tyler had told him when Troye asked about it this Saturday, it was unusual for someone to capture Tyler’s interest the way Troye had that first night. And continued to do since.

It wasn’t just his stunning appearance – lord knew Tyler had met his fair share of attractive men – but the easy-going humor that had begun to shine through his guarded exterior was captivating and left Tyler craving to know more about him. He knew Troye had been thinking about him too since their first meeting. He only hoped it wasn’t just in the negative like Troye had indicated when asking about the flowers.

Troye had looked understandably taken aback when Tyler came by his apartment unannounced. Still he’d accepted Tyler’s advances without hesitation and that memory alone made Tyler’s smile widen as his drive came to an end when he parked outside his apartment building. It couldn’t have been all negative, not with the response Troye’s body had given him.

His smiled stayed firmly in place as he made his way inside. He could barely wait for tonight.

-x-

The sun was slowly beginning to set when Tyler knocked on Troye’s door later that same evening. He looked down at his shoes, laughing at the muffled sound of Troye bumping into something and cursing colorfully just on the other side of the door. Next he heard the lock slide open before he looked up at the face of a slightly flushed Troye standing in the open doorway, grinning back at Tyler.

“Hi,” Troye greeted him, sounding a bit out of breath.

“Hi,” Tyler smiled back, keeping their gazes locked and the moment seemed to hang in the air for a short while before Troye stepped back to allow Tyler inside.

The second he closed the door behind him, Tyler was moving forward. There really was no reason for them to stall the inevitable with small talk, when they could get to the point of why Tyler was here the minute he stepped inside. He practically launched himself on Troye, grabbing him by the waist and pulling him close to reclaim his favorite spot on Troye’s long neck.

Troye stumbled a bit but caught his balance by reaching up to hold Tyler’s biceps. A moan reached Tyler’s ears as he sucked at the soft skin underneath his lips and almost lost his footing when Troye stepped out of his embrace, holding Tyler back with outstretched arms.

Lifting his head quickly, Tyler blinked in surprise as he watched Troye turn to saunter off towards his bedroom. Once he reached the corner that led into the short hallway, Troye stopped and looked back at Tyler over his shoulder while reaching for the bottom of his shirt.

“Are you planning on joining me?” he asked before quickly pulling the shirt over his head and disappearing around the corner.

Tyler narrowed his eyes and felt more than heard a growl rumble in his throat before he covered the path Troye had taken in a few strides, pulling his own shirt off on the way. He reached the bedroom, already opening the fastenings on his pants, and stilled when he saw Troye standing by the side of the bed, pushing his pants and boxers off in one go. Troye looked up at him from under his lashes and Tyler drew a steadying breath before walking over to stand directly in front of him.

Troye’s arms came up to circle his neck again and pulled him close. Tyler’s hands automatically found their earlier resting places on Troye’s waist while he bent his neck to reacquaint his lips with Troye’s skin. Just as he was tightening their embrace, Troye’s head fell forward, making his warm breath land on the bottom of Tyler’s neck.

The whispering touch of Troye’s lips to his skin made Tyler pause with a soft inhalation. During all of the times they had done this so far, Tyler had never felt Troye’s mouth on him and the fast pace they’d started off in seemed to simmer down in anticipation of Troye’s reaction.

Tyler gasped louder when Troye tightened his hold and opened his lips, only to close them slowly over the spot he was breathing against. The teasingly light kiss made Tyler close his eyes as he exhaled shakily. Troye lips were warm and soft as he began moving them with steadily increasing pressure in bolder kisses. Tyler moaned when the tip of Troye’s tongue came out to lick a spot further up his neck before sucking the skin into his mouth carefully.

On the verge of telling Troye to make sure he didn’t leave any marks, Tyler closed his mouth quickly, somehow compelled not to disturb the moment. Troye was being brave enough to initiate touch on his own and Tyler could feel something shift in Troye’s demeanor. It wasn’t anything tangible; just a subtle tensing of his muscles, a firmer planting of his feet against the floor, that made Tyler feel like he was more or less melting in his arms.

A hand slid up to hold the back of Tyler’s head, tilting it to give Troye better access to the skin underneath his jaw and Tyler groaned as he sucked gently at the skin under his earlobe. His own hands stroked Troye’s back in encouragement, silently conveying his enjoyment.

Troye licked Tyler’s skin once more before leaning back, making Tyler lift his head and open his eyes. Troye looked at him with a darkened gaze and began turning Tyler’s back towards the bed, pushing him down to sit on its edge.

Tyler swallowed heavily when Troye dropped down onto his knees and spread Tyler’s legs to sit between them, hands resting on the inside of his thighs. Troye’s eyes had shifted to focus on the proud length resting against Tyler’s stomach and Tyler couldn’t help but whimper when Troye licked his lips.

The noise made Troye’s eyes snap up quickly to Tyler’s again and the beginnings of a smirk tugged on the corners of his lips. Tyler’s stomach swooped deliciously at the sight. Bending forward, Troye kept their gazes locked as he opened his mouth before licking carefully at the very tip of Tyler’s erection. Tyler moaned weakly and leaned back on his hands to watch as Troye’s eyelids fluttered closed to cover up his blue irises before licking again, more firmly.

Tyler moaned louder that time and heard an answering hum from Troye as he began flickering his tongue over the glistening skin, collecting the clear drops of precome that rose from the slit. Tyler watched with steadily quickening breaths as Troye wrapped his mouth around him, his cheeks hollowing out and his lips pursing around the flesh as he suckled gently.

One of Troye’s hands came up to grip Tyler around the base to steady him and slowly sank his mouth further down on his rigid length. Tyler’s hands flew up into Troye’s hair of their own accord and he sat up straighter, throwing his head back with a groan and squeezing his eyes shut at the warm suction surrounding him. Troye hummed again and started bobbing his head, moving his hand up to meet his lips on every downward move and stroking down again when he lifted back up.

Tyler was breathing heavily through his open mouth, his hands unable to stay still, stroking Troye’s hair back from his forehead with his fingers and running through it to the back of his head to grip it there. His fingers tightened when Troye’s other hand stroked up to rest in the nook of Tyler’s hip, his thumb brushing over the inside of his thigh in rhythm with the movements of his head.

Tyler was still awed by Troye’s forwardness but he certainly wasn’t complaining. The way Troye seemed intent on making Tyler feel good was a new but thrilling development. It was as though the younger man was letting go of the last of his reluctance to fully submerse himself in what they were doing and finally accepting that he was a sexual creature, just like Tyler and everybody else. Tyler felt oddly proud that he’d managed to draw this side of Troye out in the light, in addition to being very flattered.

Taking a deep breath, Tyler brushed through Troye’s hair once more before starting to lean forward a bit and reaching over to the bed side table to retrieve the lube. Troye released his length from his mouth at the movement and sat back to watch Tyler with panting breath. Tyler felt his erection twitch when he looked down at Troye, taking in his flushed cheeks and swollen, wet lips.

Tyler drew a breath, ready to tell Troye how delicious he looked, when his fingers brushed against something he hadn’t expected to find inside the drawer and it made him pause. Closing his fingers around it, Tyler lifted his hand and watched as he revealed a neat string of condoms dangling from his grip.

He smiled slowly, raising an eyebrow, and turned his focus back to Troye, who was resting back on his haunches with his hands folded in his lap at Tyler’s feet, flushing a deeper red and avoiding his gaze. Tyler sniggered but decided not to say anything. Troye’s blush was enough to let Tyler know he was perfectly aware of how the fact that he’d bought condoms might look. Well, how it might look to anyone else but Tyler. The simple gesture was a subtle yet very clear confirmation that Troye was indeed giving this thing they had going the green light and Tyler felt a tingle of excitement rush through him.

Suddenly overcome with an urge to show Troye that he approved of this new development and, hoping that Troye would be willing to, Tyler ripped one of the packages from the row of condoms and grabbed the bottle of lubrication before sitting back again. When Troye finally looked back up at him, Tyler smiled and reached down to place the items in Troye’s hands, winking before shuffling back towards the centre of the bed. He leaned back on his elbows and lifted one of his knees, gently jerking his head back to beckon Troye to follow him.

Troye watched him with wide eyes before he scrambled up from the floor and crawled onto the bed beside Tyler, still holding the bottle and wrapper in his hand and coming to rest on his side to look down at Tyler once they were at eyelevel. Troye let his gaze wander over Tyler’s reclining body. Tyler spread his legs a bit wider in an even clearer sign of what he had in mind and when Troye’s eyes lifted quickly to meet his own, Tyler hoped that his look conveyed the heated desire that washed through him.

Troye seemed to understand him perfectly since he quickly uncapped the lube bottle and, swallowing visibly, measured out a dollop onto his slightly unsteady fingers. Tyler bent and lifted his other knee while resting back on the bed, eagerly anticipating Troye’s intimate touch when he reached down between Tyler’s legs.

The slightly cold feeling of the lubrication made Tyler jump a little, but he settled back and drew a deep breath when Troye’s fingers began slowly spreading the slick substance over his entrance. He kept their gazes locked for a second more, knowing that Troye was watching him for signs of discomfort, and closed his eyes on a moan when he felt one of the fingers slip inside.

Tyler kept his breathing steady and relaxed his body around the intrusion, enjoying the feeling of Troye preparing him slowly, but quickly growing impatient with the measured movements of his finger. He pushed down on Troye’s hand to show that he was ready for more.

“I won’t break. One more,” he whispered before groaning in pleasure when Troye followed instructions and pushed another digit in alongside the first. The slight stretch made heat pool in Tyler’s groin and he felt his erection twitch against his belly in appreciation.

The fingers pumped steadily, occasionally spreading apart to loosen his muscles further and bending in search of his prostate. Tyler moaned weakly when they found it, gripping the covers underneath his hands and rolling his hips in time with Troye’s fingertips as they kept up the contact with sure brushes over the sensitive gland. He whimpered when they backed away, only to hiss when Troye added a third finger of his own accord.

Tyler opened his eyes and immediately met Troye’s. It seemed the other man hadn’t looked away from his face when he had them closed. A hitched sigh escaped Tyler’s lips as he basked in Troye’s attention, thoroughly enjoying the way his fingers moved with sure strokes inside him.

Troye’s fingers faltered a bit, however, when Tyler’s hands searched the bedding around him for the condom and, upon finding it, opened the wrapper quickly. He saw Troye’s eyes follow his movements as he sat up on one of his elbows and reached down towards Troye’s erection with the hand holding the condom. He couldn’t put it on one handed, though, and Tyler breathed in through his nose when Troye slowly pulled his fingers free from his opening to help hold the tip in place. Tyler rolled the condom down his length in sure strokes and Troye moaned at the touch. Tyler, whose current position had his face level with Troye’s neck, leaned forward slightly to kiss his flushed skin.

He leaned back again when the condom was in place and pulled Troye with him, settling him on top of his own body and smiling up at Troye when he fell into the space between his legs. Tyler wrapped his arms around Troye’s shoulders and rolled his hips upwards, pushing their arousals together in the snug space between them. Troye moaned, mimicking the movements a few times before settling a bit lower.

He stilled and lifted up to look down their bodies while placing the tip of his length against Tyler’s entrance. Tyler stroked Troye’s upper back and nodded when Troye lifted his eyes back up to look at him, silently asking if Tyler was ready.

Troye began pushing forward and Tyler put conscious effort into relaxing his muscles under the pressure at his opening. It slowly gave way to accept Troye inside and Tyler moaned, closing his eyes as Troye sank steadily deeper. He relished in the slight sting of the stretch and sighed when Troye’s hips settled flush against his buttocks.

Troye paused there and Tyler opened his eyes again to see that Troye was still as intently focused on him as before and breathing heavily through his open mouth.

While Tyler found it very sweet that Troye seemed so concerned, his body ached to be taken and he wanted Troye to know it. So, tightening his arms around Troye’s shoulders, Tyler lifted his legs to wrap them around Troye’s waist and pull his hips harder against him.

“Now fuck me,” he growled through his teeth. Troye’s eyes widened before quickly falling closed as he groaned when Tyler purposely tightened his muscles around him. Troye’s hips lurched and Tyler gasped in surprise at the sudden, harsh movement.

Troye pulled back slowly and bent his head to rest it on Tyler’s shoulder before thrusting forward again. He repeated the motion, moaning as he began setting a steady pace to his increasingly determined thrusts. Tyler gasped and tilted his head to the side when Troye began licking heatedly at his neck. Troye closed his lips over Tyler’s skin every now and then to suck at a particularly sensitive spot, his breath escaping him in harsh puffs every time his hips pushed forward.

Tyler gripped at the hair on the back of Troye’s head. The spikes of pleasure that spread through him as Troye plunged in repeatedly made Tyler’s body act against his own better judgment and had him pressing Troye’s lips against his skin in a silent plea for him to suck harder. He cried out when Troye responded by sinking his teeth into Tyler’s skin and sucking at the flesh in his mouth. Tyler’s legs tightened around Troye’s waist, making his hips lift further from the bed and tilting them into Troye’s movements. The new angle had Troye sinking in deeper and Tyler groaned as his pleasure heightened.

He could feel himself moving closer to his completion and began meeting Troye’s thrusts by pushing up against him, savoring the answering moans that rose past Troye’s lips. The movements of Troye’s hips sped up, showing Tyler that he too was nearing his climax. Tyler slipped the hand resting on Troye’s back down to slide in between their bodies and wrapped it around his length, beginning to pump himself with rapid strokes.

Troye lifted his head from where he’d been pressing his face against Tyler’s neck and looked down at him from under hooded eyelids, not once faltering in the pace of his increasingly desperate thrusts. Their harsh breaths mingled in the small space between them and Tyler moaned as he felt his stomach tighten at the dark lust in Troye’s eyes.

He swallowed when Troye whimpered and broke their stare as he let his head fall to Tyler’s collarbone, and Tyler blinked in confusion at the unexpected swelling sensation in his chest. Troye’s hips began to stutter in their movements and weak moans tumbled from his lips on every thrust before he cried out, his hips jolting forward seemingly of their own accord.

The signs of Troye’s release quickly pulled Tyler out of his sudden daze and he only needed one more tug on his length to reach his own blinding climax with a high-pitched moan. Warmth built and spread throughout his limbs, sending tingles all the way to his toes and fingertips as his body jerked with orgasm.

Their harsh breathing was closely timed as they slowly came down from their peaks of pleasure, shaking from the strain on their muscles. Troye’s body molded to Tyler’s as he sank down on top of him in slow relaxation and Tyler pulled out his hand from between them to wrap his arms around Troye’s torso. His legs slipped from their hold on Troye’s waist to land feet down on the bed beside his resting body.

Troye drew a deep breath, carefully pulling out and Tyler moaned at the loss as Troye turned to fall back on the bed beside him. Tyler was still trying to catch his breath when Troye spoke up from his side.

“Wow,” was his breathy comment, making Tyler smile and look over at him. “That was… Wow.” Troye seemed to be unable to find other words to describe his thoughts and he looked back at Tyler with an almost goofy grin covering his face.

Tyler’s chest warmed at the easy cheerfulness in Troye’s expression and he smiled wider when Troye suddenly giggled. Troye’s eyes widened and he quickly slapped a hand over his mouth when he realized what he’d done, making Tyler cackle despite himself.

“I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that you liked that,” Tyler teased as he continued to watch Troye’s reddening face, where he still held his hand to his mouth while nodding in reply. 

“Good,” Tyler continued before letting a firmer tone slip into his voice. “But don’t get too used to it – I enjoy _this_ -,” he reached his hand under Troye’s body to grip one of his buttocks, “-far too much to give it up easily.”

Troye gasped behind his hand and nodded again in response. Tyler allowed the smile back onto his face, giving one more firm squeeze to the pert bottom in his hand before relaxing back into the bedding with a satisfied sigh. He lifted his hands to fold them behind his head and watched from the corner of his eye as Troye removed the condom before scooting of the bed and walking out of the bedroom.

Tyler had just closed his eyes when a wet towel hit him square in the face, making him jump in fright. He pulled the towel off quickly as he sat up on his elbows and scowled at Troye’s laughing form standing in the doorway.

“Hey, don’t pout! I know how uncomfortable it is when it dries into your skin,” Troye smiled and inclined his head towards Tyler’s torso, clearly indicating the drops of release scattered across his skin.

Tyler wiped quickly at his chest and stomach before sitting up and balling the towel in his hands. He aimed at Troye’s head, but his throw wasn’t quick enough since Troye ducked out of the doorway with a (very masculine) squeal.

Tyler laughed before reaching up to turn down the covers of the bed and lifting them to crawl in underneath. He settled back against the pillows and closed his eyes again while he waited for Troye to return to bed, his languid body quite ready for sleep.

He didn’t have to wait for long before he heard shuffling footsteps crossing the room and felt the bed dip under Troye’s weight as he crawled back into bed. Troye didn’t stop beside him though. Instead, Tyler’s eyes flew open when the other man settled on his lap above the covers, still as naked as the day he was born.

Troye was looking down at him with a gentle smile and Tyler’s hands came to rest on Troye’s knees before he was conscious of the movement, his fingers stroking the skin slowly. He was so fully focused on Troye’s face that he failed to notice the dark strip of fabric in his hands, but quickly looked down at Troye’s hand when he lifted it to reveal a rolled up tie in his palm.

“You left your tie here that first night. I forgot to tell you last time,” Troye explained as he indicated for Tyler to take it, seeming almost shy.

Tyler lifted the tie from Troye’s hand and watched it unravel into a long rivulet falling from his fingers. It was a nice tie, but he couldn’t say that he’d missed it since he apparently left it behind. He studied it for a moment before looking up to meet Troye’s eyes, lifting their hands to press the silky fabric back into Troye’s palm.

“Consider it a gift,” he smiled back, watching as Troye shook his head.

“I can’t keep this! It must have cost a fortune,” Troye argued. Tyler smiled wider and wrapped his hands around Troye’s, closing his fingers over the tie he still had resting in his palm.

“I want you to have it,” he said gently but firmly, hoping to make it clear that he wouldn’t argue about it anymore.

Troye sighed in defeat and looked down at their hands, were Tyler tightened his grip before letting Troye’s hand fall back into his lap and continuing to study his face in silence. Troye lifted his eyes once more after a few moments.

“Thank you, Tyler,” Troye whispered around a hesitant smile and Tyler grinned back, glad that Troye liked the impromptu gift.

A rush of playfulness came over Tyler while he watched the cheeks of the suddenly coy man in his lap become stained with another blush and he slipped the tie from Troye’s grip. Troye lifted his head in surprise and opened his mouth. But what ever he had planned to say died on his lips as Tyler reached up to toss the tie around the back of Troye’s neck and quickly tying it off into a bow.

Tyler laughed in delight as he fell back against the pillows, somehow highly amused by the way Troye now closely resembled a human present.

Troye lifted an eyebrow at Tyler’s antics and turned his head to study his appearance in the mirrors across the room.

“Lovely,” Troye drawled, his tone highly unimpressed and making Tyler laugh even harder. Troye’s lips quivered as he was clearly struggling to hold back a smile of his own and he slapped Tyler lightly across his upper arm when he turned back to look at him. “It’s not funny!” Troye admonished through purposely pursed lips, and set Tyler off into another bout of laughter.

Tyler knew it wasn’t funny, but for some reason he couldn’t stop laughing and before he knew it, tears of mirth were pouring down his temples into his hair.

“Oh my god,” he heard Troye groan from somewhere above him and he could practically see the exasperated eye-roll even through his clenched eyes. Tyler managed to calm down a little, taking deep deliberate breaths when he felt Troye slip off his lap and lift the covers to settle in beside him.

Tyler wiped at his eyes after lifting off his glasses and setting them aside on the bedside table. He reached out to gather Troye into his side with his other arm, only a little disappointed to see that he had removed the tie.

Troye settled against him, resting his head in the nook of Tyler’s shoulder and reaching over to pinch his arm in warning when Tyler chuckled again.

“Shut up,” Troye mumbled against his neck and Tyler could feel Troye’s smile against his skin.

“Sorry,” he smiled back and lifted his hand to settle it on top of Troye’s where it rested on his chest. Tyler stilled as the prospect of sleep reminded him that he had to tell Troye about how they wouldn’t be able to see each other again for a while.

He drew a deep breath and subconsciously tightened his hold on Troye’s hand before he began speaking in a more serious tone. “I’m gonna have to leave pretty early tomorrow. I have a flight to San Francisco in the afternoon.”

He felt Troye shift to peer up at him from his resting place on his shoulder.

“Oh?” Troye prompted gently.

“I’m going along on a business trip for four nights and after that, I’ve got every day booked solid for the next two and a half weeks. My next time off isn’t until Friday three weeks from tomorrow,” Tyler explained while the hand on the arm he had wrapped around Troye absentmindedly brushed through Troye’s hair.

“Oh,” Troye answered quietly, bending his head back down to breathe the word across Tyler’s chest.

“I’ve got the whole weekend to my disposal then, though,” Tyler added gently. “And I promise to call when I have a moment on my own.”

Troye sighed almost imperceptibly before he whispered, “You don’t have to make any promises, Tyler, I understand that you’re busy.”

A knot formed in Tyler’s stomach at the words, making him reach up to lift Troye’s chin and tilt his head back so that Tyler could fix him with a steady gaze.

“I will call you. I promise,” he repeated, intoning his words with meaning to show that he intended to follow them.

Troye blinked as he held Tyler’s gaze and nodded once before resting back against his shoulder.

“Okay,” Troye whispered in reply. Tyler breathed deeply, hoping that Troye had at least a tiny bit of trust in what he said. He hadn’t given Troye any reason to not believe him in the past, had he? If he had, Tyler couldn’t remember it.

Unless Troye’s hesitance was based on Tyler’s job, and that was a train of thought that Tyler was unwilling to take this late and when he had Troye’s warm body relaxing in his arms. Once again, he just hoped he could prove to Troye that what he did to make money didn’t define him as a person and that Tyler always kept his word.

The voice in the back of his head asked why it was so important to him to win Troye’s trust when he knew perfectly well that he wasn’t supposed to grow attached to his clients. Tyler ignored it, however, remembering doing the same when he’d met Tom. Instead of thinking of it further, Tyler favored the tug of sleep behind his eyes.

He pulled Troye tighter against him, distantly noting how Troye snuggled in closer before he drifted off into slumber.

-


	8. One Night With You And I Forget My Past

-

Tyler let out a long huff when he sank down into the couch of the small seating area in his room, finally able to relax and put his feet up after a long day. It was nearing one in the morning and he’d just gotten back to his hotel room from being the plus one to a guy attending his second cousin’s Vegas-wedding.

Apparently, the man Tyler had escorted was tired of being asked when he was going to join the ranks of married men in his big, Italian family, and chose this opportunity to come out, rather spectacularly, by bringing a male date.

Personally, Tyler thought that perhaps his client could have chosen a better moment to drop that bomb on his relatives, since some of them hadn’t recovered from the shock all day. Plus, it had kind of taken the spotlight away from the bride, which was really just sad. There was a time and a place for everything, but Tyler really had no say on the matter.

So, he’d kept his mouth closed throughout the ordeal and tried to keep his smile and his small talk polite. Some of the younger women among the guests were more welcoming and had eventually included Tyler in their conversations. And the food had been amazing, so at least there was that.

His client hadn’t wanted ‘the package deal’, however, leaving Tyler with the rest of his night to do with as he wanted. And what he wanted was to finally call Troye.

He’d tried to find the time to do it every day since they’d last seen each other, but when Tyler had said that he would be busy, he hadn’t been lying. From the business trip, to a couple of event nights, to today’s wedding, Tyler’s schedule had been packed full to the point where all he had time for in between was to sleep and get ready for the next appointment. And he wanted to have time for more than just a quick ‘hello’ when he finally called. Texting certainly wouldn’t do either.

Tyler shrugged out of his shirt and pulled his phone from his pocket, quickly clicking Troye’s contact when he found it. He knew it was late at night and that he risked waking Troye by calling him now, but he had a feeling Troye wasn’t the type to go to bed early on a Friday, even if he just stayed home. 

As he leaned back and placed his phone to his ear, listening to the dial tone, Tyler hoped that his instincts were right.

It took a few rings, but eventually the call connected and Tyler smiled when he heard a slightly breathy “Hello?” spoken in a voice he had missed more than he cared to admit.

“Hope I didn’t wake you, gorgeous,” he said in lieu of a greeting, listening carefully for signs of sleep in Troye’s voice. Though, all he could hear was Troye’s shallow breathing, as if he had run to get his phone.

“Oh. No, it’s alright. I- I was… Um…,” Troye trailed off, his voice a bit strained as he searched for words, apparently not finding any when he didn’t add anything more.

Tyler frowned slightly. “Am I calling at a bad time?”

There was a moment of silence before Troye answered with a question of his own. “Uh… Why do you ask?”

“You just sound a little distracted,” Tyler said, noticing the faint sounds of bed sheets rustling in the background as Troye cleared his throat. A knot suddenly tightened in his belly. Maybe Troye wasn’t alone. “Did I interrupt something?”

“No, no!” Troye was quick to reply this time. “I was… thinking.”

Tyler’s frown deepened, trying to make sense of Troye’s odd behavior since he was clearly trying to avoid the questions. Perhaps Tyler should have waited with his call. It was late after all; chances were that Troye had gone to bed, ready to go to sleep.

Wait.

Troye was in bed. Out of breath. ‘Thinking’.

Suddenly, it clicked and Tyler’s smile widened again.

“Uh huh,” he dragged out his comment, making sure it came across in a teasing manner. “May I ask what you were thinking about?”

“I don’t know,” Troye gulped audibly, probably catching on to what Tyler was thinking from the tone of his voice. “Things.”

Tyler almost rolled his eyes at the way Troye kept giving him elusive answers, but decided to carry on with his teasing to see if he could get Troye to admit what he had been doing. If Troye really didn’t want Tyler to know, he would have said so by now or changed the topic. Besides, the thought of Troye lying in his bed, caught in the act of pleasuring himself, was making Tyler’s member begin to stir in interest beneath the zipper of his black slacks.

“‘Things’, huh?” Tyler repeated. “I mean, I can’t be sure, but I could have sworn my ears were burning just a minute ago.” Tyler chuckled softly, not expecting the answer Troye gave him a moment later.

“I’m sure they were.” Troye’s tone was more sarcastic than hesitant this time, although that didn’t stop Tyler from latching on to his words.

“So you were thinking about me?” Tyler pressed. His laughter trailed off, however, when the call went silent except for the faint sound of Troye’s breathing on the other end. The silence had Tyler suddenly become unsure. Had he pushed it too far? “Troye?”

There was a pause, in which Tyler held his breath, before Troye murmured, “Maybe.”

Tyler’s body flushed with heat and he felt his arousal grow firmer at the quiet confession. This turn of events was pretty much out of the blue, since Tyler had planned on them having an easy conversation when he called, but Troye’s answer had just opened up for a different kind of interaction and Tyler certainly wasn’t about to complain. The thought of having phone sex with Troye made his stomach swoop.

“I’ve been thinking about you too,” he said in a murmur of his own and heard Troye sigh softly. He swallowed and drew a deep breath as he reached down to press the heel of his hand against the hardness straining underneath his pants. He waited a moment before daring his next question, letting the tone of his voice drop. “Are you hard?”

There was a soft gasp on the other end of the line and Tyler could hear Troye’s breath speed up a bit.

“Yeah…” Troye whispered after a moment and Tyler groaned gently as he rubbed his hand in firm strokes over his own clothed erection.

“Me too,” he whispered back.

Troye gasped again and Tyler settled lower in his seat while reaching for the button on his pants. He opened it and lowered the zipper before pushing his hand in beneath the elastic of his boxers. Sighing contentedly, he closed his hand around his length, now fully hard and begging for friction.

“Touch yourself,” Tyler breathed as he closed his eyes and started moving his hand in short strokes, keeping his grip light and teasing.

“I am,” Troye murmured deeply and Tyler’s erection jumped at the jolt of pleasure that shot through him.

“Fuck, Troye,” Tyler hissed. “Do you have any idea what you do to me?” He heard a rustling of movement and Troye moaned gently, making Tyler bite his lip.

“Why don’t you tell me?” Troye whispered.

Tyler breathed in through his nose and released it slowly through his open mouth as he let his thumb brush over the tip of his erection, collecting the moisture that had gathered there before spreading it in lazy circles.

“Just imagining you laying there in bed, pleasuring yourself all while thinking about me, listening to my voice, is making me so hard,” he murmured, tightening his grip around the pulsing steel in his hand. “I wish I was there with you.”

Troye’s breath had been growing heavier while Tyler spoke and he exhaled shakily, making Tyler almost shiver at the sound.

“And if you were?” Troye coaxed breathily.

Tyler tugged at his boxers, sliding them down a bit further over his hips and licked his lips as he resumed his strokes with a bit more speed, yet still keeping them teasing.

“Then I would be lying right beside you, watching you take pleasure from your own touch. I probably wouldn’t be able to resist feeling your soft skin for long, though.” Tyler paused momentarily to draw a deep breath. “I’d start at your shoulders, slowly trailing my fingers down your flushed body before reaching further down to remove your hand, replacing it with mine to continue stroking you. Then I’d lean over and start kissing your neck. I know the spots that make you melt under my touch by now.”

Troye’s breath hitched but Tyler pressed on, keeping the tone of his voice low.

“I’d let my mouth follow my hand, stopping for a moment at your nipple, teasing it with light flicks of my tongue and sucking it into my mouth, nibbling carefully. You like it when I do that, don’t you? Use a bit of teeth?”

A whimper sounded from Troye’s end of the call and his voice was strained when he replied with a weak, “Mm-hm.”

“Thought so,” Tyler smirked. “Then I’d move on, kissing my way over your stomach, settling lower to breathe over your hard flesh, taking you into my mouth slowly. I would suck gently at the tip while reaching down to tease the tips of my fingers over your hole. Then I’d push them inside you as I swallowed you down.”

Troye mewled and his breathing stuttered for a moment. Tyler imagined Troye following his words as instructions and gasped as the heat in his groin intensified at the thought. He had to know.

“Are you doing it?” he whispered. He listened to Troye’s shaky breathing and bit his lip again, stroking his hand up to rub at his tip, relishing in the intense pleasure that rushed through his body as he closed his fist over the sensitive skin there, rubbing up and down in short movements.

“Yes,” Troye breathed after a moment and Tyler’s hips bucked as he choked on a groan.

He quickly reached down to grip the base of his length tightly, the pleasure suddenly too much when added to by the knowledge that Troye was fingering himself right at that very moment.

“Fuck,” Tyler hissed, biting down hard on his lip as he heard Troye moan in response. He tried to calm his racing heart, breathing heavily through his nose before his muscles eventually relaxed a bit and he sank back into the cushions.

He exhaled shakily, carefully resuming the movement of his hand. “Does it feel good, baby?” he whispered, although it came out raspy.

Troye moaned and Tyler could hear his breathing grow more labored.

“Yeah… But not as good as you,” Troye whispered between his panting breaths and Tyler answered with a moan of his own.

“I wish you were here, too,” Troye continued breathily. “You were right that first night, you know; I’ve never been with anyone like you before. It’s like you know the things I like before I know it myself. And the way you fill me so completely…” Troye paused on a whining moan and Tyler whimpered as his hips jerked again.

“It’s like I don’t know where you end and where I begin, and I don’t think anything will ever compare to the feeling of having you inside me...” he trailed off as his panting increased and Tyler’s breath hitched when his chest tightened at Troye’s words.

“Troye,” was all Tyler managed to whisper before words left him all together. All he could do was relish in the sparks of pleasure emanating from his very core out to the rest of his limbs as he continued to stroke himself while listening to Troye’s heavy breathing.

He tried to suppress the urge to speed up his strokes and risk climaxing too soon. He wanted to hear Troye reach his high and not drown out the sounds himself. He moaned as he heard Troye whimper in pleasure while moving in his bed, the whispering noise of skin sliding on fabric clear in the background.

Tyler imagined Troye’s body stretching and curving on the sheets as his hands kept wringing luscious sounds of pleasure past his lips. He wondered what Troye was seeing in front of his mind’s eye; if he was imagining Tyler sitting alone in a hotel room, his eyes closed and skin flushed with heat, stroking himself while thinking about what he’d like to do to Troye once they were able to be together again. 

Or if he was trying to picture Tyler right there with him, pressing him into the mattress, taking him, surrounding him, claiming him.

Tyler teased the pad of his finger over the tender ridge just under the head of his erection before resuming the steady strokes. He tightened the grip around his pulsing length, feeling his rapid heart beat through the skin of his palm and he swallowed around a groan. His pleasure started mounting as he shifted restlessly in his seat.

“I’m close,” he panted out through his heavy breaths, tugging more urgently on his flesh.

“Me too,” Troye moaned, his voice strained as he was clearly nearing the point of no return.

Tyler felt the telltale signs of orgasm build with alarming speed and he began panting harshly just when Troye started making short, high-pitched whines on every exhalation. Tyler tensed, bending slightly forward and almost curling in on himself as his hand flew over his erection in rapid strokes, echoing Troye’s desperate noises.

“Think of me when you come, Troye,” Tyler panted harshly. “Think of me, like I’m thinking of you.”

The sudden strangled shout signaling Troye’s completion sent Tyler flying over the edge and into his own blinding climax.

He arched off the couch, pressing his shoulders into the cushion behind him as his hips jerked spasmodically, and he moaned weakly through his open mouth. Listening intently to Troye’s choked whimpers as Tyler’s climax pulsed through him, he basked in the knowledge that he’d helped Troye reach it using nothing but words. It was overwhelming to know he could affect him to such a degree.

When the intense waves of pleasure eventually eased into a light shuddering, Tyler relaxed against the soft material of the couch and slowly blinked his eyes open. His heart was thudding in his chest and he tried to clear the fog of lust that still clouded his mind.

That was intense. Troye’s words still bounced around in his head, filling him with a kind of warmth he hadn’t thought possible. Then again; Tyler hadn’t expected to ever come across someone who had such a powerful influence over him as Troye had. He was glad that the younger man opened up more with every run-in they had with each other, slowly allowing Tyler closer by increments.

Tyler was brought out of his thoughts by a soft moan coming from the other end of the call, letting him know that Troye was probably slowly sinking down from his high too. His own breath was still coming in short pants as he glanced down his body, wiping lazily at the droplets of his release on his skin. A few stains caught his eye as they soaked into the dark brown fabric of the cushion next to him and he laughed breathily.

“If they charge extra for the stains on the couch, I’ll be expecting you to make up for it next time we meet,” he chuckled while picking up his shirt and dabbing the cushion with it.

Troye’s shallow breaths mingled with his answering chuckles before he replied in a lazy, but amused voice, “Is that so?”

Tyler smiled wider as he stilled his movements and leaned his head back. “Yes, and you can start by paying for the first drink when I take you out Friday two weeks from now.”

Tyler swallowed, trying to still his heart as it thumped in his chest, almost audible in the silence that followed. He knew he was practically asking Troye out on a date.

He just hoped he wasn’t asking for too much.

Just as the silence had stretched out long enough for Tyler to start closing his eyes and get ready to take back his words, Troye’s voice spoke softly in his ear.

“I’d love to.”

Tyler’s eyes snapped open and he lifted his head. “Really?” he whispered incredulously before coughing, catching the eagerness in his voice and feeling himself flush. “I mean, great! Can’t wait,” he smiled shyly, very glad that Troye couldn’t see his face.

Troye laughed gently before whispering, “I’ll see you then. Night, Tyler.”

“Sweet dreams, Troye,” Tyler murmured, listening as Troye sighed softly before the call disconnected.

Tyler lowered his phone from his ear and leaned his head back against the couch again, closing his eyes.

Two weeks wouldn’t be able to pass fast enough.

-


	9. Chapter 9

-

Troye shoved the last plastic drawer shut with a bang and leaned forward to bump his head repeatedly against the black exterior of the combined printer and copying machine. No paper. And as far as he could see, there were no refills anywhere in the small nook where the floor kept their office materials along with the copier and shredder.

It was late Friday afternoon and getting these documents copied and sent in the internal mailing system to be filed was the last thing Troye needed to do before he could call it a day. But as usual, things just wouldn’t go his way.

It was the perfect ending to a frustrating few days that Troye was going to have to trudge all the way down to the basement storage room just so he could finish his week. Stacey had been sick all week, so it wasn’t a surprise that the small stock they kept on their floor hadn’t been refilled. The people covering for her had probably forgotten. Marvelous.

Troye sighed heavily and stood up straight, wiping his hands on his grey slacks and turning towards the door that led back out into the office landscape. He headed towards the elevators, dragging his feet and glancing at the clock that hung over on one of the pillars in the middle of the big room. 4:17 pm. He sighed again as he reached the elevators and pressed the buttons.

When the ding sounded and one of the set of doors opened, he was glad to see he’d be alone on his way down to the lobby. He didn’t feel like having to keep up any polite small talk.

Instead he leaned back against the wall of the elevator after pushing the button and plucked his phone up from his pocket to check it for the umpteenth time that day. No new messages or missed calls. Troye tried to ignore the disappointment that formed a heavy lump in his belly. He hadn’t heard from Tyler all week since the voice mail he had left that Sunday morning when Troye was still asleep.

In the recording, Tyler said he was still too busy to call at a normal hour, but that he couldn’t wait until that Friday. This Friday. Today.

But he still hadn’t let Troye know anything more about his plans. Troye placed the phone back in his pocket and shook his head. Tyler had probably been stalled by a client or booked for a new appointment and forgotten all about Troye. Or perhaps he’d changed his mind. Troye’s chest tightened uncomfortably.

Troye had been walking around with nervous yet excited butterflies in his belly for days after the phone call he’d had with Tyler two weeks earlier.

While the things he’d said were true, Troye hadn’t meant to reveal them in quite such a great detail, if at all at that point. It wasn’t that he minded Tyler knowing about the affect he had on him, but things were moving a bit faster than Troye was ready for. It wasn’t that long ago that he’d made the decision to give this strange booty-call-thing they had going a shot.

But the edges between lust and infatuation were blurring with every interaction they shared. It had snuck up on him, lurking in the recesses of his being, and Troye could feel the beginnings of a desire for something with more substance than the purely physical rise within him. And pursuing anything like that with Tyler was futile, even if he had agreed to what would qualify as a date. Troye knew it could never lead to anything more, though, not while the ‘escort’-aspect still served as a sobering reminder that Tyler wasn’t really available.

Troye needed to keep himself in check and not stray from the path that he was comfortable with. If only the butterflies weren’t so damn persistent, it might actually work.

Troye was pulled from his thoughts when the ding of the bell signaled his arrival at the bottom floor. He kept his head down as he walked out, turning to the right to walk past the reception desk towards the door leading to the storage room. He was almost halfway there when a voice suddenly called his name above the buzz of the busy receptionists, making him look up and turn his head towards the seating area.

Immediately spotting the familiar face, Troye stopped in his tracks. His heart skipped a beat before it started beating hard as Troye watched a smile spread on the man’s lips when he realized that he had Troye’s attention. Troye stayed silent, not moving from his spot, as Tyler rose from his seat and walked towards him.

“Hi, gorgeous,” Tyler greeted once he was standing in front of him. Tyler’s smile softened as he stepped even closer and reached out to brush his fingers over the back of Troye’s hand where it hung at his side. “I’ve missed you.”

Troye drew a deep breath, feeling his face flush slightly, and answered in a whispered, “Hi,” before letting his eyes dart to the side to follow a group of his colleagues chatting amicably as they passed through the lobby on their way out of the building. “What are you doing here?” he asked in a steadier voice once he focused back on Tyler.

“I thought I might as well pick you up here instead of waiting for later,” Tyler said. His smile faltered a bit, however, when Troye didn’t know what to say for a few moments. “We are still on for tonight, right?” he asked hesitantly. “I know I probably should have called first…”

“Oh,” Troye replied softly, still reeling a bit over the fact that Tyler decided to show up at his work. “No. I mean, yes, of course,” he stumbled over his words, blushing even harder while smiling back shyly.

Tyler’s face lit up again and he inclined his head toward the main entrance behind them. “Good. So are you ready to go?”

“Oh, um,” Troye reached up to rub at his neck while glancing towards the storage room. “Actually, I have a thing I need to do first. But you can wait here, if you want.”

“Can I come with you?” Tyler took a step closer, his smile eager.

“I’m just going into the storage for some paper and then heading back upstairs real quick. It won’t take long,” Troye explained with a shrug, not sure why Tyler would want to tag along.

“I’ll keep you company,” Tyler said in way that made it sound almost like a question and gestured for Troye to lead the way.

Troye lifted a doubtful eyebrow but nodded slowly. “Okay,” he answered hesitantly before turning and heading towards the door. He heard Tyler fall into step behind him while he pulled out his passage card to swipe it over the lock pad on the wall beside the doorframe when they reached it. The lock clicked and Troye pushed the creaking metal door open, reaching in to flick the light switch.

The room lit up quickly, some of the fluorescent lights blinking a few times before settling. The large, slightly chilly room beyond was filled with rows of metal shelves, much like a library, creating a pathway in between them leading all the way back to the far wall.

Turning on his heel to hold the door open when he had stepped inside, Troye looked back at Tyler expectantly, waiting for him to follow. Tyler walked in, his eyes scanning the room and lingering for a moment on the stacks of boxes littering the floor just inside the door.

“Nice,” he commented, his tone carrying a light note of sarcasm. “Love what you’ve done with the place.”

Troye rolled his eyes before releasing the door to let it slam shut behind them. “You’re the one who insisted on tagging along,” he pointed out before beginning to walk towards the back, passing by rows of shelves on his way to the stash of printer paper. It didn’t make sense to keep them so far from the entrance, but who was Troye to argue with the organizing logic of the people who had to run all the way here to get refills regularly.

“Do people come in here often?” Tyler asked conversationally as he followed behind Troye.

“Not really, I guess. It’s the floor assistant’s jobs to keep the supplies stocked in each department. Stacey’s been sick this week, though, which is why it looks like I’m gonna have to do it,” Troye sighed while looking at Tyler over his shoulder as they reached one of the rows of shelves almost furthest at the back.

Tyler simply hummed in response, his face void of expression as he glanced towards the door they had come from. Troye wondered for a moment why Tyler was asking before turning back around and walking down the isle on the right, scanning the packed shelves and quickly locating the papers he needed.

Just when he reached up to grab one of the packages, a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and warm hands splayed up over his chest, making him freeze on the spot. Heat enveloped him as he felt Tyler step in close to press up against his back.

“Tyler!” he hissed under his breath in warning as Tyler bent his head to nuzzle at his neck. Taken aback by the unexpected forwardness, Troye ignored the fluttering feeling in his stomach.

“What? I haven’t seen you in forever,” Tyler murmured against the skin just behind Troye’s left ear and walked them forward a step to crowd Troye up against the shelf. “And you just said this place is mostly empty,” he added before rolling his hips.

Troye’s breath caught in his throat when he felt Tyler’s obvious hardness slide against his ass and he batted at the hands holding his chest in an attempt to make Tyler release his hold.

“That doesn’t mean that someone couldn’t walk in at any second!” he admonished harshly before gasping when Tyler licked hotly at the shell of his ear, making his skin break out in goose bumps. 

“You’re gonna get me fired, Tyler,” he breathed, eyes sliding closed while he leaned into the touch against his own better judgment. He moaned gently when Tyler rolled his hips again, his length sliding snugly in the dip between Troye’s clothed buttocks.

“Then I guess you’re just gonna have to try to stay quiet,” Tyler answered in a deep voice before his hands started travelling down to the fastenings on Troye’s pants and making fast work of the button and zipper.

Troye nodded, his breathing steadily getting faster, and reached up to hold the edge of one of the shelves in front of him when Tyler tugged his pants and boxers down over the swell of his bottom. He felt Tyler working on his own zipper, the back of his hands brushing against Troye’s bare skin.

Troye moaned when the heat of Tyler’s erection came to rest against him and he slid his feet further apart to ease the path when Tyler began sliding himself back and forth in the cleft of his ass.

Shivering both from the feeling of Tyler’s excitement and the strength of his own sudden arousal, Troye whispered, “Hurry.”

Tyler groaned in response, licking at the skin just underneath the collar of Troye’s shirt before leaning back a bit. Troye heard the plastic wrapper of a condom package being opened and he chuckled breathlessly as he turned his head to the side, resting his temple against the shelf that was conveniently level with his face.

“Do you always carry a stash of condoms with you?”

“Of course I do,” Tyler murmured before leaning forward to press a wet kiss on Troye’s neck. “You never know when a situation will present itself. Like now, for instance,” he whispered while he prepared quickly.

Troye scrunched his nose up when he heard Tyler spit into his hand. “Are you saying you weren’t planning this at all?” he asked before his breath faltered a bit when he felt Tyler place the tip of his erection in between his cheeks to nudge at his opening.

“Maybe a little,” Tyler breathed against his skin before he sealed his lips over one of the vertebrae in the back of Troye’s neck and began pushing forward.

Troye grunted at the sting but pressed back into the movement, his breathing hitched as Tyler filled him in one, smooth motion. They didn’t stop moving until Tyler was in to the hilt and a deep moan rose from Tyler’s chest when they paused there to breath for a moment.

Tyler gave Troye some time to adjust before he pulled back and pushed back in carefully, pressing Troye into the shelves with his chest while his hands kept Troye’s hips tilted backwards. Troye moaned loudly, scrambling for leverage on the shelving, and felt Tyler nip his shoulder through his shirt.

“Be quiet,” he whispered as he shoved Troye forward on another, a bit harder, thrust.

Whimpering weakly, Troye nodded his head and held on. The shelves were digging into his chest almost painfully but the intoxicating ache emanating from where Tyler breached his body was all he could focus on as Tyler’s hips sped up.

The sounds of their labored breathing bounced between the naked concrete walls and the shelves surrounding them, interrupted every now and then by an accidental moan. They crashed together repeatedly, harsh and punishing, racing towards their common goal in haste.

Troye was so focused on the pleasure coursing through him that the click of the lock on the door didn’t register. But the voices that drifted into the room when the door creaked startled him into snapping his eyes open, cold realization washing over his frame while he felt Tyler still his movements.

“I think it’s down here,” a girl said loudly as the sound of heels clicking against the floor started moving down the isle between the shelves.

Prying at the hands still holding his hips, Troye leaned back and struggled against Tyler’s grip, trying to wiggle loose. They needed to cover up and they needed to do it quickly. Troye breathed in, about to tell Tyler to back off, when Tyler’s hand flew up to cover his mouth as his body pressed him back into the shelving, still buried deep inside him.

Turning his head to give Tyler an incredulous look over his shoulder, Troye’s eyes widened when they locked with Tyler’s darkened ones. Tyler shook his head slowly and leaned forward to lick at the shell of Troye’s ear before making a quiet hushing noise, all while the clicking steps of their unwanted visitor drew ever closer.

Frozen in his spot, the seconds seemed to draw out for an eternity as Troye’s rapid breaths washed in short huffs over the side of Tyler’s forefinger where it was pressing against the skin underneath his nose. He closed his eyes and swallowed harshly, his heart fluttering like that of a bird, convinced that they were about to get caught. He was going to be thrown out of the building without a chance to even clear his desk first.

“Wait, Trisha! It’s here,” another girl called out from further up the room and the footsteps stopped. “That’s the one, right? On the top?”

The clicking heels started moving back towards the door, eventually coming to a stop when the first girl spoke again, this time appearing to be back with her friend.

“Looks like it. And great, they haven’t even unpacked it yet,” she sighed and Troye could hear the shuffling of cardboard against cardboard as they most likely lifted one of the boxes from the pile by the door.

Troye breathed out shakily in relief, his muscles relaxing, and he slumped against the hard shelves as the girls continued to chat between themselves. That had been too close. He lifted his hand to grab Tyler’s wrist, about to pull the hand covering his mouth away, when Tyler slowly rolled his hips.

Choking on his breath, Troye’s eyes flew open as his hand tightened around Tyler’s wrist. He reached back quickly with his other hand to press his palm against Tyler’s hip, trying to stave the movement.

Tyler seemed to have other ideas, though, since he leaned back in, lapping at Troye’s neck and adjusting his angle while repeating the rolling thrust, pressing their bare skin together when he sank in deep again. Troye’s eyes rolled back into his head at the ruthless pressure now aimed against his prostate. Another slow thrust and Troye sank his teeth into Tyler’s palm, trying not to let his whimper of pleasure escape. Tyler hissed in pain.

The noises over by the door stopped abruptly as the girls halted in their conversation.

“Did you hear that?” one of them whispered.

The silence was deafening as Tyler nipped at Troye’s skin in retribution, keeping up the torturously slow movements of his hips. Troye couldn’t hold back the quiet whimper that escaped him and heard one of the girls gasp.

“Are there rats down here?”

“I sure as hell ain’t staying to find out,” the other girl replied with conviction. The sounds of rapid shuffling followed before the door creaked again, banging shut a few seconds later.

Troye didn’t waste any time to pull Tyler’s hand from his mouth, not meeting any resistance this time.

“For fucks sake, Tyler,” he gasped as he tried to regain his breath, a hitched moan tumbling past his lips as Tyler reared back and pushed forward, his thrusts picking up speed again.

Tyler didn’t reply, instead opting for continuing to press hot, openmouthed kisses along Troye’s neck while reaching down his front.

Troye moaned again as Tyler’s hand closed over his leaking member and began stroking him in rhythm with his short thrusts. Searing heat shot through him and Troye’s knees began shaking as the combined stimulation forced him toward his climax rapidly.

It only took a few moments before a particularly well-aimed push and a twist of the hand tugging at his flesh had Troye whimpering and sending sparks through his limbs, momentarily blinding him with white hot pleasure. Shaking under the force of his orgasm, Troye felt Tyler’s hand cup the tip of his pulsing length, catching his release before it went flying onto the shelf in front of him.

A deep groan resonated in his ears as Tyler’s thrusts stuttered before Troye was being pressed forward harshly, Tyler lodging himself deep as his member jumped within Troye’s clenching muscles. Tyler’s hot breath washed over the skin above the collar of his shirt and Troye slumped heavily against the shelving, waiting for the rush of pleasure to run its course.

It slowly ebbed away, leaving Troye panting through his open mouth while his legs shook with the effort to keep him upright. The hand holding his hip slid back to settle in the dip of his spine, providing leverage for Tyler as he leaned away and pulled out slowly. Troye moaned at the gentle tug on his sore flesh and felt Tyler brush his thumb over his skin in apology before stepping back further.

Troye drew a deep, steadying breath and pushed himself away from the shelves. He reached down with shaking hands to pull up his boxers and pants, hearing Tyler search the shelf behind them and he glanced back to see him find a left-over wrapping paper he deemed good enough to wipe his hand on before wadding it up into a ball. Tyler’s eyes lifted as he caught Troye looking.

“What?” Tyler asked with a raised eyebrow. Troye shook his head and glanced down his body while closing his button and zipper after tucking in his shirt.

“I can’t believe you,” he said around a small smile.

“I will wash my hands,” Tyler sniggered at him and threw the ball of paper to the side to bounce down the isle where it hit the wall, rolling back towards them a bit before coming to a stop. Troye wrinkled his nose and turned around fully to watch as Tyler reached down to close up his own pants.

“First of all – ew,” he laughed gently.

“Second – what I meant was that whole stunt you just pulled. Why couldn’t you just wait until we were somewhere more private?” He tried to convey his curiosity through the look he fixed on Tyler.

Tyler’s smile softened when he lifted his head back up and he stepped forward, his hand sliding up the back of Troye’s arm as he leaned in and pecked his cheek, lingering there.

“I couldn’t help myself,” Tyler murmured against his skin and leaned back, his gaze dancing over Troye’s face. Troye felt himself blush under the scrutiny.

“Do you even understand how close that was?” Troye argued further, his voice lower this time as he fought the bashfulness he felt rising under the surface of his determined expression.

“Yes, I do. And don’t even try to say it wasn’t hot as fuck,” Tyler smirked teasingly before turning on his heel and starting to walk out of the isle.

Turning the corner, he called back over his shoulder, “Don’t forget the paper!”

Troye shook his head in disbelief but felt his smile widen as he reached for the package of printing paper he had been forced to abandon earlier. He pulled it off the shelf and followed Tyler, hastening his steps to catch up just when they reached the door. Trying to leave the room at the same time when they opened the door left them lodged in the doorjamb momentarily and Tyler laughed as he shoved Troye lightly with his elbow.

Troye rolled his eyes and he shoved back, his smile turning toothy with laughter.

When they stumbled out and let the door bang shut behind them, Troye caught the eye of one of the receptionists. He stopped sniggering in a heartbeat and diverted his gaze to the floor when she raised a suspicious eyebrow at them.

“Wait here, I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he said quietly as he pointed Tyler in the direction of the seating area and rushed off towards the lifts.

It didn’t take him long to get back upstairs, refill the copying machine, and finishing up his work. He hurried into his booth to grab his jacket and stuffed the reports in an envelope, placing it in the slot marked ‘internal mail’ in the stand by the elevators as he waited for one to bring him downstairs again.

The dinging of the elevator bell had never been a more welcome sound as Troye eventually walked back out on the bottom floor, immediately lifting his eyes to search the seating area for Tyler. His eyebrows lifted when he found Tyler standing by one of the red sofas, engaged in a conversation with Caspar.

Troye quickened his steps, a bit worried about the potential conversation topics they could be sharing, and caught the end of Caspar’s ongoing sentence when he drew closer.

“… and I hope you can make it,” Caspar said before he turned to face Troye when he noticed his presence, slinging his arm around his shoulder and pulling him into his side, smile widening. “Troye would love for you to be there.”

“Where?” Troye asked, looking between Caspar and Tyler in confusion. What had he set up this time?

“The park!” Caspar answered cheerfully and waited for Troye to clue in. He didn’t, however, only continuing to stare at Caspar with a questioning look.

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten already,” Caspar sighed. “The ‘picnic slash barbeque slash game day’ tomorrow. Remember? We’ve been planning this for weeks! You never listen to me, I swear to god-”

Realization dawned on Troye and he jumped in to interrupt the rant he knew was coming, “Yes, yes! I remember.”

Caspar and Joe had talked about how a day in the park would be ‘an awesome start to the summer’ for probably a month now and Troye was surprised that he’d let himself get distracted by other thoughts enough to momentarily forget. Caspar had, after all, mentioned just that morning how he was going to go get the things they needed for the games right after work.

Troye just hoped the games Caspar had in mind weren’t going to involve much running. He hated physical activity.

Well.

At least the sort that didn’t require the removal of some or all clothing…

“Good!” Caspar perked up again. “I was just asking Tyler if he’d like to join us. You don’t mind do you, Troye?” he asked, his smile turning almost leering when he squeezed Troye’s shoulder.

“No, I don’t mind,” Troye replied after barely giving it any thought. Of course he would like Tyler to be there. He turned to look at Tyler’s amused face. “If Tyler wants to, that is?”

Tyler laughed and stuffed his hands in his pockets, bouncing forward a little on the balls of his feet. “Tyler wants to,” he repeated, eyes practically twinkling.

Troye smiled back and wiggled loose from under Caspar’s arm when Tyler gestured at the main entrance. “I’ve got my car parked outside if you’re ready to go now?”

Troye nodded and followed Tyler as they headed towards the exit, hearing Caspar pipe up behind them.

“Oh, and go easy on him, Tyler! I want to see you both at the park by 2 p.m. tomorrow, well-rested and ready for breaking a sweat for a different reason.”

-x-

“Tyler, nice to see you’re back,” the bartender greeted them as Troye and Tyler walked up to the bar carved out of a dark wood lining the wall on the far left of the room. They’d just arrived at a small, but pretty upscale watering hole on the edge of downtown L.A. – one Tyler claimed to be his favorite spot to relax and have a few drinks when he wasn’t working. He’d told Troye in the car on their way there that he’d found the place while out with an old friend one night and had found his way back ever since, turning into somewhat of a regular along the way.

Troye scanned the dimly lit room, noting a small stage at the far end where a pianist was playing a non-descript yet pleasant melody, the kind one would normally associate with a calm, fancy bar that provided live music. The small, round tables that filled the rest of the room were adorned with red table cloths and had burning candles placed in the centre. The image was awfully stereotypical, as were the nicely dressed patrons placed around the tables, either conversing amongst themselves or turned towards the stage to listen to the piano.

Even the barman was dressed in the expected black, long sleeved button-up with a black apron tied around his waist. His hair was a dark brown and he had a pleasant face with kind brown eyes that smiled warmly back at them.

“Hello, Korey. How’re things?” Tyler answered with a wide smile as he folded his hands on the bar top. Troye stood back a step, feeling a bit awkward but keeping a small smile on his face as his eyes darted back and forth between the two, following their exchange.

“Oh, you know, the usual. It’s been a while since you graced us with your custom,” Korey glanced up at Tyler while wiping the counter lined with pestles, sifters, and bowls of lime wedges behind the bar.

Troye chuckled quietly but didn’t try to otherwise interrupt when Tyler laughed, most likely at the pretentious words Korey had used, “Yeah, I’ve been busy lately.”

Korey chose this moment to turn his gaze upon Troye, eyeing him up and down slowly.

“I can tell,” he drawled, the corner of his mouth lifting into a crooked smirk as he looked back up at Troye’s face, which Troye knew was flushing with color at the unabashed scrutiny.

“Hey!” Tyler remarked from Troye’s side as he stepped back and Troye jumped slightly as he felt Tyler’s arm slide around his lower back, pulling him closer. Troye turned to look at Tyler, his eyes widening when he did.

Tyler was frowning at Korey and his blue eyes carried a careful warning, making it clear that he was all but pleased with Korey’s obvious flirting. It made Troye’s head spin a little.

“What? A guy can look, right?” Korey argued and Troye felt Tyler’s hand tighten on his waist as he opened his mouth. Troye never got to hear what Tyler was about to say, though, when Korey suddenly broke out in laughter, shaking his head and lifting his hands in a surrendering gesture.

“I’m just kidding, Tyler, calm down! I’ve never seen you bring guys here,” he paused for a moment while focusing back on Troye. “This one must be special,” he said with a gentle smile.

Troye blushed even harder and glanced at Tyler to gauge his reaction.

Tyler’s face was now relaxing back into a smile, and was that a dusting of color on his cheeks too? The butterflies were back in Troye’s belly and fluttered about with vengeance while Tyler cleared his throat.

“This is Troye,” Tyler said and Troye felt him brush his thumb over his side where Tyler still held him. “And we’d like a drink, if that’s at all possible?”

“The usual?” Korey asked as he turned his brown eyes on Tyler again and slung the towel to set it over his shoulder.

“Please,” Tyler replied and turned to look at Troye, who noticed just now how close their faces were when he did that. “And you?”

“I’ll have a Bud Light with lime, please,” Troye replied, realizing that this was the first time he’d spoken since they got there.

“I’ll bring them to your table,” Korey smiled back and began preparing the drinks.

Tyler turned on his heel, steering Troye along with him as he went in search of a free table for them. They found one close to the wall and Troye sat down, facing the stage as he listened to the pianist play a strangely familiar tune. Troye couldn’t remember where he’d heard it before – perhaps it was a song his dad had played on one of his old records back home – and he didn’t notice it when he began humming along softly, eyes going slightly out of focus as his thoughts drifted off to his family in Australia.

“Do you miss it?” Tyler’s voice brought him back to the present and Troye blinked before turning to look at him.

“Hm?” he asked softly, images of his mom crying when they saw him off at the airport lingering inside his mind for a second.

“Singing? Doing music?” Tyler elaborated just before Korey walked up silently to set their drinks down in front of them. He winked at Troye as he turned and walked off again without a word.

“Um,” Troye began, a bit thrown off before remembering Tyler’s question. “I mean, sure. It’s what I came here to do, what I thought I would be doing for the rest of my life.”

He lifted his glass and sipped at the cold beer. “I still record ideas from time to time, or jot down notes for potential lyrics, but it’s never gonna lead to anything. I told you I stopped trying.”

“I wish you hadn’t,” Tyler murmured and Troye glanced over at him curiously, seeing him rest his chin in his palm, leaning his elbow on the table as he gazed back at Troye.

“Why?” Troye asked, furrowing his brow.

“I have a feeling you’d be amazing, I guess. And from what I just heard, I think I might be right.”

Troye felt his face show the doubt he felt, but blushed all the same, making Tyler laugh gently when he looked down at his glass.

Tyler continued, his words still gentle, “Will you sing for me sometime?”

Troye looked up at him again and smiled back when he saw that Tyler was still focused on him, light laughing-lines forming at the outer corners of his eyes.

“Sure,” he answered, chuckling lightly while Tyler grinned wider. The butterflies in his belly returned when Tyler didn’t break their gaze, only continuing to smile at him. Troye didn’t look away either, letting himself fall into Tyler’s eyes for a moment. Despite the dark frames of his glasses, the blue of Tyler’s irises were vibrant and the lenses did nothing to dissipate the warm happiness radiating towards him.

Preoccupied by their staring match, Troye only distantly noticed the pianist finishing the piece he had been playing and rise from his seat, seeming to take a break in his set.

Tyler’s eyes broke their gaze to glance quickly in the direction of the stage and sat up from his leaning position, reaching for his glass.

“You’ll get the chance to sooner than you think,” Tyler said cryptically and Troye blinked.

“What?” he asked, genuinely confused this time. But before he had the chance to ask what Tyler meant, the light spilling over their table from the spotlights on the stage was shadowed by the frame of someone standing by their table. Troye looked up and saw the pianist smiling down at him.

“So, do you want to give it a try?” he asked and gestured behind him, indicating the stage. Troye felt his pulse speed up and he looked back at Tyler quickly.

“Tyler?” he asked, hearing his voice come out unsure and guarded. What was going on? “What is this?”

Tyler only smiled wider, though. “Remember those contacts in the industry I mentioned? Well, there’s one sitting right over there,” Tyler inclined his head towards the opposite wall, “and I asked Jonathan here if he would accompany you for a song or two and, well, seems like the stage is yours,” Tyler said encouragingly while making a sweeping motion with his hand.

Troye sat stock still as the seconds ticked by in silence, Tyler’s words hanging between them. Feeling his frown deepen, Troye saw Tyler’s smile falter a bit before he looked away to glance up at the pianist still looking at him expectantly. Troye smiled tightly in an attempt to be polite.

“Thank you, but I’m leaving actually,” he bit out shortly and rose from his seat.

“Troye?” Tyler’s voice was soft, hesitant.

Shaking his head, Troye reached for his back pocket, grabbing his wallet and pulling out a few bills. He placed them on the table in front of his nearly untouched drink and turned to walk away, not looking at Tyler before he left. He quickened his steps as he heard the scraping of a chair against the floor and footsteps running after him.

Hot anger churned in his stomach, a sharp contrast to the gentle affection that had been there just a few minutes ago.

Why would Tyler do something like that? Arrange for Troye to basically audition without even letting him know first? Without asking. What had he expected? That Troye was just going to thank him profusely, all starry-eyed, and get up there to sing in front a room full of strangers? And, not to forget, a fucking talent scout.

Troye had reached the door and was pushing it open roughly, stepping out on the sidewalk.

No. That’s just not the way things worked. Not in his world. And Tyler knew nothing about what he wanted.

Trying to draw shaky breaths around the lump in his throat, it dawned on Troye that that was a big part of why this sudden turn of events jarred him to such a degree. Screw the singing. His stomach churned painfully when he realized that, despite all the physical things Tyler and he had done, they barely even knew each other.

“Troye!” Tyler called out as he caught up, catching the door as it was beginning to swing shut behind Troye. “Wait!”

Troye just kept on walking until he felt a hand close round his arm.

“Hang on a minute,” Tyler’s voice was breathy from his quick march. “What just happened?”

“You tell me, Tyler,” Troye rounded on him, letting disappointment tinge his voice. He fixed Tyler with a frown, his anger now pumping through his body along with the bitter realization that Tyler was basically a stranger. “Why did you do that?”

Tyler was looking back at him with a frown of his own, his eyes darting over Troye’s face in confusion. “I wanted to surprise you,” Tyler argued, his words laced with question as he released Troye’s arm. “I thought you’d like it. I’m sorry, Troye. If I’d known you’d react this way, I wouldn’t have done it.”

Troye sighed, his body slumping as he looked down at his feet. He couldn’t stay angry at Tyler when he looked at him like someone had just kicked his puppy. That didn’t mean Troye wasn’t still upset about it, though. He’d let his infatuation go too far and there needed to be some ground rules established before it went any further. A thought dawned on him and, even if Troye knew that it was spiteful and immature to deflect his disappointment with himself onto Tyler, he couldn’t hold back as he lifted his head to look at him.

“Remember the night we met, at the benefit, when you preached to me about how I didn’t know anything about you?” he asked firmly, but dropping the volume of his voice in an attempt not to sound too harsh.

“What?” Tyler’s frown deepened. “Yes, but-”

“No. No ‘but’,” Troye interrupted him, wanting to have his say. “You told me then not to judge you because of what you are. For what you do. Same goes for you. While you might know what the inside of my bedroom looks like, or what color underwear I’m wearing, don’t you dare go around making assumptions that you know anything about who I am, or what I want.”

The light had dimmed in Tyler’s eyes during his speech, but Troye chose to ignore the way his throat closed up tightly at the sight. Instead, he signaled the end of the discussion by turning around again and reaching for his phone.

“Will you at least let me drive you home?” Tyler’s spoke up behind him after a short moment of silence, sounding defeated. Troye’s chest squeezed, making it difficult to breathe, but he was determined to stand his ground.

“I’ll take a cab,” he murmured in response, starting to walk down the road as he put the phone to his ear. “Bye, Tyler.”

-


	10. Chapter 10

-

Pulling into the parking lot, Tyler found a free spot to park his car in surprisingly fast considering that it was turning out to be a nice Saturday, with the sun peaking high in the sky, signaling that noon had come. He flipped down the visor, opening the little mirror to check his hair one last time and adjust his sunglasses.

It was a clear, cloud-free day, on the brink of summer, and the air that greeted him when he eventually stepped out of the car was almost vibrating in anticipation for the approaching heat of the coming months. L.A. wasn't such a bad place to spend summers, even if the temperatures got a bit overwhelming sometimes. It hadn't reached that stage quite yet, though, with the sun providing comforting warmth and the air still fresh with the remains of spring.

But despite the nice weather, there was a lingering hesitance in his step as Tyler began walking towards the area of the park where Caspar had said they were to meet. It was bound to be awkward when he showed up, with the way things had ended the night before. What was supposed to have been a pleasant surprise and encouragement for Troye to reclaim his dream, had turned bad quicker than Tyler had time to register.

He could have never expected that Troye would react the way he did. The sudden closed-off look in Troye's eyes when he'd stared at him from across their table had made Tyler's stomach fill with dread and left him wondering what he'd done wrong.

What Troye said after that had hurt. Tyler knew he was right - they didn't know much about each other than the most superficial things, but Tyler refused to think that was all there was. If there was something he knew from experience, it was that a person consists of more than what they tell him to his face. Their personality, the way they move and behave, their instinctual actions and responses, were just as telling. And Troye had unknowingly given Tyler just as much knowledge about who he was through their physical encounters, as he would have if they had sat down and talked about themselves, only in a different way.

Tyler knew that Troye was someone who liked to hear things said out loud rather than having to read hints, for example. He knew that Troye didn't say anything unless he thought it was worth saying, yet couldn't seem to hold back from letting out little clues about his innermost thoughts when he lost a bit of control over himself. Tyler also knew that he was someone who was able to make Troye's control slip and it made his chest swell in pride.

Or, at least Tyler thought he knew these things. Maybe he was wrong.

The mistake Tyler had made in arranging the music set only made him determined to make sure he wouldn't repeat it. Tyler was nothing if not a quick study and he wanted to learn from his mistakes. Never again did he want to see Troye look at him like he had the night before and that was the sole reason he'd gone to the park. Troye wouldn't get of rid of him that easily.

Rounding the corner of a grove of trees on the little walkway he was following, Tyler spotted a group of about seven people by one of the communal barbeque and picnic areas set up on the edge of a bigger grass plain. He immediately picked out Troye and Caspar in their midst and Tyler's pulse increased with sudden nervousness. He hoped he hadn't screwed up again by showing up.

Caspar was the one who spotted him first as he drew nearer and Tyler smiled slightly while lifting his hand in acknowledgement when Caspar's arm looked like it was about to fall off from his rigorous waving. His step faltered a bit when he saw Troye look up and lock eyes with him across the distance. Troye didn't smile or in any other way show that he'd seen him; only broke their short stare and grabbed Caspar's arm, turning the other man towards him while bending his head and whispering something. Tyler's stomach flipped. Was he telling Caspar that he didn't want Tyler there?

Tyler continued to walk at a slower pace than before, hanging back a bit to give them time to sort it out, whatever 'it' was. It wasn't long before he saw Caspar roll his eyes at Troye and turn towards Tyler with a smile again, dismissing Troye by turning him his shoulder.

"Tyler! Glad you could make it," Caspar beamed at him while jogging a few steps to meet him half-way in the short distance left between Tyler and the rest of the group.

Tyler nodded back but couldn't help it when his gaze followed Troye as he walked back towards the table to help one of the girls set it up with disposable tableware. Caspar seemed to know who Tyler was focused on, even from behind his sunglasses, since he immediately put his hand on Tyler's shoulder and steered him away toward the barbeque pit, where Joe was lighting up the coal inside the bricked construction.

"He told me about what happened last night," Caspar explained under his breath and Tyler turned to look at him, admittedly somewhat surprised that Troye had told Caspar about it. It didn't strike him as something Troye would normally do, but then again, Tyler was finding many things surprising about Troye lately.

"Yeah, that didn't go as well as I had hoped," Tyler admitted, nodding at Joe in greeting and changing his glasses to his regular pair that he'd stowed in the breast pocket of his button down. "I would have loved to hear him sing," he continued as he turned back to Caspar, who sighed gently.

"I know it's not easy, but try not to take it personally. He can be a whiny little prick when he's not the one in charge of how things are run. Believe me, I know," Caspar around a small smile. "You did something very nice for him and in thanks, he tells you off. He's lucky you're apparently stubborn enough to not let him push you away." Caspar shook his head, pausing a bit in thought while Tyler studied him carefully, flattered by that last statement. "Or perhaps you really like him?"

The question caught Tyler a bit off guard and he blinked, feeling his face flush while considering how to word his answer. It felt a bit like high school all over again with Caspar saying it like that.

"I... I don't know. Maybe?" Tyler knew it was a meek way of saying that, yes, he did indeed like Troye. The warmth spreading through him when sort of admitting it out loud was nothing but confirmation of the fact.

Shit, when had he allowed that to happen?

Caspar seemed pleased with his answer, however, and it was as if he too could see the real meaning behind Tyler's words when he beamed back at him. "He likes you too."

Yup. High school.

Still, Tyler's stomach did a little flip as he stared up at Caspar's smiling face.

"Really?" Tyler glanced back at the picnic table, where Troye was now sitting with his face turned down, looking at his phone as he fiddled with it. "I mean, after last night I'm not so sure-"

"Yeah!" Caspar butted in eagerly before Tyler could finish speaking. "To be completely honest, he hasn't actually told me that he does," he admitted and Tyler's heart sank just a little. "But he's been really distracted lately and whenever I ask him about you, he either starts rambling and blushing, or bites my head off. Tell me, did he yell at you, by any chance?"

Tyler looked back at Caspar, wondering why he wanted to know and feeling worse again for upsetting Troye the way he had. "Close to it. Why?"

"Just think about it - would he have reacted as strongly if he didn't actually care?" Caspar raised an inquisitive eyebrow at Tyler, who could only shrug his shoulders in reply and hope that what Caspar was saying wasn't too far fetched. The answering smile he felt pulling at his lips told him that he liked the idea of it, at least.

Caspar patted his upper arm comfortingly before turning to help Joe get the burgers started for the barbeque, leaving their conversation at that.

Tyler stayed where he was, staring out over the vast open space of the park in front of him for a minute and trying to gather his thoughts. If Troye really did care, Tyler just hoped that he hadn't ruined it. Looking back over at Troye, Tyler froze for a moment at what he saw.

Troye was standing up this time, giving a hug to a tall, dark-haired guy that appeared to have just arrived at their little gathering. He was wearing a short sleeved t-shirt that clung to his defined torso and tightened around what looked like some serious biceps when he wrapped his arms around Troye, hugging him back. The guy was hot. And he was holding Troye. And Troye was smiling.

Not noticing the way his hands balled into fists, Tyler decided to put an end to the silence between him and Troye and, conveniently, also the way muscle-dude was currently messing up Troye's hair with his hand while they took a step back from each other. Quickly walking over to them, he extended his hand and plastered on a winning smile.

"Hi, I don't think we've met before! I'm Tyler," he beamed, focusing solely on the other man and just noting out of the corner of his eye how Troye was staring at him like he'd grown an extra head. 

Muscle-dude glanced at Troye before grabbing Tyler's hand in a shake, seeming to quickly recover from his surprise at Tyler's sudden appearance. "Sawyer, nice to meet you," he replied in a hoarse voice, smiling crookedly back at Tyler. Jesus, he even sounded hot. Annoyance caused Tyler's body to tense even further, but tried not to show any outward reaction. "Are you Jenna's new boyfriend?"

'Who?' Tyler thought silently, looking at where Sawyer was pointing behind them to a group of girls talking and laughing amongst themselves.

He shook his head quickly. "No, I'm with Troye," he said and heard his words come out a bit sharper than intended. He hoped the smile on his face would lessen the effect as he glanced at Troye for the first time since walking over. Troye wore an exasperated yet attentive look on his face, as if he was simultaneously over the conversation and curious about what was being said.

"Oh, you're dating?" Sawyer looked between the two of them and Tyler opened his mouth to reply.

"Ye-"

"No." Troye said at the same time, his answer carrying over Tyler's with clarity.

Ouch.

Sawyer continued to look back and forth between them curiously as Tyler turned to look at Troye, who just stared back at him, almost challengingly, as if daring him to disagree. Tyler didn't, and the silence stretched out as neither of them looked away from the other. Eventually, Sawyer cleared his throat.

"Listen, Tyler. Troye here is a good kid; you treat him right, okay?" The underlying warning in Sawyer's words was softened by his smile as he reached up to mess up Troye's hair again, but Tyler still heard it clear as day. As if he didn't know that already. He also fervently wished Sawyer would stop doing that touching thing.

Troye grumbled gently and ducked away from the hand in his hair, but there was no mistaking the way his lips turned up into a carefully pleased smile despite him trying to act annoyed. Sawyer laughed at his antics and Tyler almost growled. Almost.

Troye still hadn't talked to him directly and there didn't seem to be any opportunity to do so any time soon as Caspar announced the first finished burgers beginning to fly off the grill. Sawyer was already setting himself down on the end of one of the benches at the table with Troye taking the seat next to him as they started up a conversation, appearing to completely ignore Tyler once more.

Food didn't really sound all that appealing to Tyler right then, but he was still quick to make sure he got the vacant seat on Troye's other side. He wasn't even trying to hide the fact that he was listening in on their conversation.

Apparently, Sawyer had just gotten back from a long trip abroad – South America by the sounds of it, where he'd worked as a cameraman for a film crew doing some sort of documentary. Troye was eagerly asking him about the places he'd been and sounding like nothing had ever been more interesting.

Tyler poked aimlessly at the burger that had been placed in front of him by a nameless face, watching it go cold on his paper plate as he listened silently.

Caspar eventually took pity on Tyler and his sorry state where he sat slumping over his food. At least that's what Tyler suspected when Caspar dragged him into a discussion going on at his end of the table about the pros and cons of different pizza toppings. At the moment, he was pausing in his elaborate speech about the brilliance of pepperoni and mushrooms to ask Tyler his opinion. 

Weighing the option of talking to Caspar and his friends against not speaking at all, Tyler decided he'd have a better time accepting the offered room in this conversation.

"Actually, you can't beat a nice helping of ranch," he stated in a voice that gave the impression that he was stating a universal fact, leveling a pointed look at the South African sitting diagonally across from him. He noticed the looks the others gave him, but didn't smile or in any other way show that he was anything but dead serious.

"You can't put ranch on a pizza! It'd drip all over the place!" Caspar scoffed and frowned back at Tyler.

"You don't put it on the pizza," Tyler elaborated, cut off from continuing his explanation when Caspar scoffed again, seeming almost affronted that he hadn't found agreement on his favorite toppings being the reigning queens of toppings.

"Then how are you supposed to go about eating a pizza with ranch?" He looked genuinely confused, and Tyler opened his mouth to reply, when an unexpected voice chimed in from his other side.

"You dip it."

Tyler turned his head to stare at Troye, who'd been the source of the interjection, to find him looking at Caspar before turning further to face Tyler with a small smile.

"Right? You dip it in the ranch?"

"Exactly," Tyler replied softly, surprised that he hadn't noticed when Troye and Sawyer had stopped talking to listen in on the discussion. He was also happy that Troye had apparently decided to stop giving him the cold shoulder. "You dip it," Tyler repeated, letting a pleased smile lift his lips as he turned back to Caspar.

"You guys are hopeless," Caspar muttered as he shook his head, quickly turning away to continue to wax poetically about pepperoni to his avid listeners.

Now finding much more fascination in the man sitting beside him than any kind of food, Tyler faced Troye again. Troye was looking at his own plate, pushing little pieces of salad and bread crumbs around with his plastic fork, but there was still a shy smile gracing his lips. Tyler wasn't going to force him to talk about the earlier tension between them, not when they were sitting well within earshot of the others. Instead he enjoyed the suddenly comfortable silence that had fallen over them.

That was, until Sawyer piped up, asking what Tyler did for a living. Tyler had never shied away from talking openly about what he was, but he knew that if he did that now, he'd probably lose any chance he had left with Troye. And while Tyler admittedly didn't particularly like Sawyer, there wasn't really any reason to be rude, so he answered as simply and as truthfully as he could without saying too much.

"I work in the personal entertainment industry," Tyler replied, only glancing at Sawyer before looking back at Troye, who was peeking back at him from the corner of his eyes, probably worrying about what Tyler was going to reveal.

"That's... interesting. 'Personal' how?" Sawyer asked while refilling his glass with orange fizzy drink from one of the bottles placed on the table for everyone to share.

"Personal as in I work very close to my clients," Tyler offered as further explanation. "I take pride in leaving them satisfied." He knew perfectly well when and how to be discreet, but the opportunity to skim very close to the edge of innuendo like this was too good to give up. There was no way Sawyer was going to guess correctly anyway, but Troye knew exactly what he meant, and that was enough to put a smirk on Tyler's face.

Sawyer nodded slowly, probably trying to figure out what Tyler meant. "So, like, private events and catering and stuff?"

"'And stuff', yeah," Tyler chuckled, glancing at Troye to glean his reaction.

Troye simply rolled his eyes and didn't give much more of a response.

"Okay, sounds cool," Sawyer commented, shrugging one of his shoulders and nodding.

People were starting to get up from their seats around them, collecting their used plates, and Tyler looked up to see Joe handing a duffel bag to Caspar, who lifted it high up over his head.

"Alright, this is what's gonna happen! We're gonna start the games portion of this little get-together with a few rounds of 'Capture the flag', if everyone's familiar?" The group obediently nodded their heads and Tyler heard Troye groan tiredly beside him.

"So if we can all just move over to the grass over there and I'll divide us into teams," Caspar finished, pointing at the open space just beyond the picnic table.

Looking back over at Troye, Tyler realized quickly that Troye was anything but interested in playing. Seeing that everyone, including Sawyer, had gotten up to join the game, Tyler recognized his chance to finally have some time alone with Troye to resolve what was left of their awkward situation.

"We're gonna sit this one out," he called out after the group as they had begun to walk away. Caspar looked at them once over his shoulder, mouth open and ready to protest, but seemed to reconsider when he locked eyes with Tyler. He nodded in response, probably realizing that they needed to talk too.

Watching their companions set up the game from a distance, Tyler suddenly found that he didn't know exactly what to say, which was a rare occurrence for him. Well, of course he knew he wanted to apologize about his mess-up, but he couldn't figure out where to begin.

He was just pondering if he should just start by simply saying 'I'm sorry', when Troye took the decision away from him.

"You're really persistent, aren't you?" Troye asked and Tyler turned quickly to look at him. Troye didn't seem all that angry, but there was a slight frown furrowing his brow and Tyler couldn't have that.

"Yes. I'm also spontaneous, a decent cook, and I'm beginning to suspect that I might be a bit lactose intolerant," Tyler elaborated around a smile.

He was pleased to see an answering smile tug on the corners of Troye's lips before he ducked his head, probably in an attempt to hide it. "You can't stay mad at me forever," Tyler continued, the seriousness of his words making him lower his voice.

Troye sighed and lifted his head to look out over the park in front of them. "I'm not mad at you," he answered, matching the tone of his voice to Tyler's.

"Then you're just not talking to me anymore?" Tyler pressed on, wanting to know exactly what he'd done wrong and how he could fix it. He needed to fix it.

"That's the thing, though," Troye said and turned back to stare at Tyler again, a look of doubt on his face. "When have we ever really talked?"

"Then let's talk. I'm here and I want to know what I did to mess up and what I can do to make it better," Tyler scooted closer and placed his hand on top of Troye's where it rested in his lap, hoping the touch wasn't too invasive now that they were balancing on the edge of a truce.

"I've thought about what you said last night," he continued, close to a whisper. "I want to get to know you, Troye. Will you please let me?"

Troye's eyes flickered over Tyler's face, like he was studying every minute detail of his expression and trying to gauge the sincerity of his words. He settled eventually on Tyler's eyes, gazing back at him for what felt like minutes, seeming to reach a conclusion when he drew a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak.

"I understand how it would be easy for someone on the outside to think that I could, and should, just pick up where I left off trying to start a career with joy and excitement," Troye began before turning away to stare out over the park again.

"But what you don't know is how difficult that would be for me. I left my family, my friends, my entire life back home to come here, thousands of miles away, to live my dream. But I was rejected, time and time again. One guy at a record label even asked me what I'm doing here. And I couldn't answer him, because at that point, even I didn't know."

He shook his head, pausing for a moment, and Tyler squeezed his hand in reassurance. "So I gave up. It's the coward's way out, I know that, but then I guess I'm a coward. Crawling back to my parents now isn't an option, not after swearing to them that I'd make it, that I'd be alright. I have nothing to show for coming to L.A. but disappointment. Do you understand how that feels?" he asked as he shifted his gaze back to Tyler. "How humiliating it is to have to swallow the bitter fact that every minute, every ounce of effort you spent on trying to fulfill your dream was all in vain? That it wasn't for lack of trying but because you're not good enough?"

Tyler swallowed around the lump that had formed in his throat; the words pouring out of Troye's mouth making him feel naive and foolish for not making the connection sooner.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't realize," he murmured pathetically.

"It's okay... None of that is your fault anyway." Troye's lips twitched in a brief, acknowledging smile. "You know, I wasn't even that upset about the singing thing yesterday. It had more to do with you arranging it without my knowledge, without knowing if I'd be okay with it."

Tyler was well aware that Troye was leaving out the part where it bothered him that they didn't know each other, other than in the physical sense. Troye was probably aware of it too - he might even be doing it on purpose - but Tyler wasn't about to force him to talk about it if he didn't want to.

His position on the matter was implied in his words anyway – Troye wanted Tyler to learn more about him; his likes and dislikes, his way of reasoning, what he'd been through. And Tyler realized that he wanted Troye to know those things about him too.

"And I know that now, but I'm still sorry. It was stupid of me and it won't happen again," Tyler insisted, making sure his tone showed that he really meant it. "It really scared me to think that I'd hurt you."

Troye gave him a rueful smile and ducked his head a bit to look at Tyler through his lashes. "Okay, now you're making me feel bad." He turned his hand palm up under Tyler's and gave it a short squeeze. Tyler's heart thumped on a double-beat. "I guess it was a nice thought, just... please don't presume things again, okay?"

Relief flooded Tyler's body like the soothing sensation of a cooling balm on a sunburn. It was going to be alright; Troye was accepting his apology and Tyler was back in his good graces. He felt the grin spread on his face before he could think of reining it in.

"I won't. But just so you know; you're so much more than 'good enough'," Tyler replied, letting his smile soften as he laced his fingers with Troye's. "At least to me."

His pulse was racing as Troye looked down at their intertwined hands where they rested on his leg and Tyler felt himself flush when Troye eventually lifted his head to lock gazes with him again. A very endearing blush was coloring Troye's cheeks as well and Tyler was happy to see him smiling, not only with his lips, but with his entire face. There was a glow to his expression that seemed to emanate from his bright blue eyes as they shone with pleased delight, making Tyler feel heady from the onslaught.

All he could do was stare back in wonder at the change in Troye's demeanor, cautiously amazed that it seemed to have been brought about by his words and actions alone.

He was speculating whether or not to break the moment by telling Troye that he was glad to see him happy again, when Troye's gaze flickered to look up and behind Tyler, his eyes widening in alarm. Tyler didn't have time to react before a pair of strong, tanned arms had wrapped themselves around Troye's narrow waist and was hoisting him up and out of his seat, leaving them to break their grip on each other's hands if Tyler wasn't to be tugged ungracefully off the bench and land in a heap in the grass behind it.

Troye squeaked and laughed in shock before Sawyer proceeded to throw him unceremoniously over his shoulder.

"Alright, you turtle doves, enough relaxing. We need reinforcements! Troye - you're coming with me! Tyler - you're on Caspar's team," Sawyer proclaimed loudly before he started walking off at speed with Troye's upper body dangling down his back.

Troye was making valiant attempts and trying to get Sawyer to let him go by thumping his fists over his back and shouting at him to put him down, although his words lost most of their power since they were mingling with peels of giggling laughter.

Tyler frowned at Sawyer's retreating back, feeling his entire body tense in aggravation. Whatever stunt Sawyer was trying to pull with Troye, it needed to stop.

Tyler rose quickly from his seat and followed after them down to the field where the game seemed to have paused for a break. A few of the players were leaning over with their hands braced on their knees and panting heavily from exertion, making it clear that they took this whole flag-catching perhaps more seriously than necessary in Tyler's opinion.

When he saw Troye finally being dropped to his feet and Sawyer once again ruffling his hair, however, Tyler's mode darkened further. Tyler wasn't all that sporty, but his regular jogs and occasional visits to the gym made him more than capable of pulling off a silly little park game. He was stronger than he looked and Tyler was going to make sure that Troye was focusing on him, not some pumped up jock with nice teeth.

Caspar nodded at him when Tyler joined his side and pointed out the boundaries of their team territory while quickly going over the rules. Tyler turned to face the opposing team once Caspar was done and caught Troye looking at him from across the small distance, standing off a bit to the side. 

Wanting to relay exactly what was going to go down, Tyler smirked slowly and lifted his hand to point two fingers at his own eyes before turning them on Troye in the universal 'I'm watching you'-signal. It could have been his imagination, but Tyler was pretty sure he saw Troye gulp as his eyes widened in realization that he was going to be marked by Tyler for the duration of the game.

And that was exactly what Tyler did. As soon as Caspar signaled the start of a new round, Tyler moved over to the sideline to cover any path that Troye might be attempting to get over on his side of the playing field. They were relative alone on their end, with most of the others stalking back and forth by the dividing boarder looking for signs of weaknesses in the opposing teams defense.

Their stare was broken by someone saying Troye's name in a stage-whisper. Of course it turned out to be Sawyer, mouthing silent words and pointing in multiple different directions while making swerving motions with his arms, like he was giving Troye instructions on a move he was planning. Troye seemed to understand the mess, or at least pretended to, when he nodded back at Sawyer and faced forward again.

Suddenly, Sawyer broke out into a battle cry and hurled himself behind enemy lines. Tyler was raising a skeptical eyebrow as he followed Sawyer's brute attempt at getting the flag, knowing he would fail miserably to avoid getting tagged, when a flicker of movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention.

Tyler turned quickly to find Troye just running past him and he didn't even need to think twice before starting after him. Their eyes met briefly when Troye glanced back over his shoulder and shrieked just before Tyler caught up to him with ease and wrapping his arms around him from behind. Tyler pulled them both to an abrupt stop by spinning them around so that they wouldn't topple over from their momentum.

"You're gonna have to try harder than that to get past me, gorgeous," Tyler panted from the short but abrupt run as he pulled Troye closer to his front. "Off to jail you go."

He was reluctant to let Troye go but backed up a step, keeping one hand on Troye's arm as he reached down with the other to pat one of his pert buttocks in a shooing gesture. Troye pouted jokingly at him before walking off to stand in the designated 'jail' area, where Sawyer and one of the girls Tyler didn't know were already waiting to get broken out by one of their teammates.

The game picked up speed after that, but Tyler wasn't really playing other than keeping check of Troye, who for some reason didn't seem all that bothered by the childish game as he had seemed earlier, before their talk.

Tyler never made any attempts at going for the flag himself, arguing that he was better suited for the defense. And he did defend his team nicely, at least against any attempt of crossing over to his side made by Troye.

In the end, they both more or less just stood there in a stand-off of sorts, smirking at each other, feigning moves every now and then, but never really going for any runs. It was nice, having Troye's attention like this when there were so many things that could have distracted him going on around them.

That was, until Sawyer apparently thought they'd done enough standing around and came running out of nowhere to grab Troye again, picking him up under his arm and running toward the opposing team's flag, shouting something about 'going for the kill'.

Tyler didn't try and stop them this time. He was too busy trying to swallow the urge to shout at Sawyer to let Troye go. Why was he so intent on lifting Troye all the time, anyway? Was it just to show that he could? Tyler turned on the spot slowly, following them with narrowed eyes as they rushed to get the flag. The diminished team members on his side and Tyler's lack of participation meant that they were successful just a few seconds later, with Troye reaching down and snatching the yellow swatch of cotton fabric from the grass as Sawyer ran past it.

They came to a stop eventually, and when he was finally put down on his feet, Troye was waving the flag over his head and smiling. His smile turned into a laugh when Sawyer hugged him from behind and rested his chin on Troye's shoulder while their teammates cheered. A red haze suddenly clouded the edges of Tyler's vision and he clenched his jaw.

Alright, that was it. That Sawyer had had his hands all over Troye ever since he showed up and Tyler was going to put an end to it right now. Troye was his to touch, and his alone. And Troye could probably do with a reminder of that as well, with the way he was accepting Sawyer's advances.

With clear determination in his step and barely contained thunder in his eyes, Tyler marched up to Troye and took hold of his wrist, startling Troye out of his smile.

"Let's go," Tyler said shortly while he caught Troye's eyes and turned quickly on his heel to begin the short trek back towards the parking lot. He heard Troye let out a confused "What?" behind him and felt him stumble a bit, but Tyler didn't stop walking, firmly set on getting them out of the park as soon as possible. "We're leaving."

He completely ignored Caspar's shout of "Hey, where are you going, we're gonna play softball next!"

"But I got here with Caspar..." Troye said hesitantly, still not making any really attempt at pulling them to a stop, but just following Tyler as best he could without tripping.

"We're leaving _now_." Tyler made sure his voice didn't brook any argument and Troye remained quiet after that.

Soon enough, they'd reached the parking and Tyler pulled open the passenger door of his car. He lifted the hand still holding Troye's wrist, making him almost do a little pirouette by pulling him alongside the car and practically shoving him into the proffered seat.

Slamming the door shut and walking quickly around to the driver's side, Tyler had the car running and was pulling out of the parking lot sooner than he thought, but still not fast enough. His blood boiled in his veins and it had very little to do with the over-whelming heat of the car as a result of having stood in the sun all day.

In fact, it had everything to do with the uproar of emotions raging inside of him, building in intensity with every passing second. He would have called it fury, if it wasn't for the fact that he wasn't angry in that sense. Yes, he was seething, but the tangy metallic taste that boiled in his throat reminded him of an emotion that he wasn't willing to acknowledge.

The long, tense silence was broken when a tentative question came from the man sitting beside him with his hands clasped in his lap, staring out the front window.

"Tyler, where are we going?"

"My place," Tyler replied, not taking his eyes off the road. "It's closer."

There was a short pause in which Troye seemed to process Tyler's words. It should be clear by now what Tyler had in mind for when they got there - if not by the haste of their departure, then by the intense urgency that Tyler could practically feel rolling off him I waves. In fact, he could already feel himself hardening inside his jeans as he thought about what he'd do to Troye to make him forget all about the existence of other guys.

Soon enough, Troye spoke again. "Why the rush?"

This time, Tyler turned to fix Troye with a heated look, noticing how it made him squirm in his seat almost imperceptibly as he stared back. "Did you _want_ me to shove you up against a tree and fuck you in front of everyone?" Tyler retorted, hearing his own voice come out rough and deep, making his chest rumble in resonance. His eyes flickered down to see Troye's throat bob when he swallowed before he shook his head quickly.

Troye didn't say anything as Tyler turned back to focus on the road, where the familiar area of West Hollywood was starting to rush by their windows.

The duration of their drive there had done nothing to ease Tyler's mood and, once they'd parked and were out of the car, he made sure that Troye kept up by placing his hand in the small of his back. The gesture might have been eerily reminiscent of when Tyler had gently urged him inside as they left the cab that first night, if it wasn't for the fact that this time it was only slightly short of aggressive.

When the front door to his apartment finally slammed shut behind them, Tyler immediately latched on to the base of Troye's neck with his mouth, sucking harshly as he bodily backed him up against the wall with a growl.

Troye grunted as the impact pushed the air out of his lungs through his open mouth and Tyler almost crowed with victory when he heard Troye moan in apparent approval of the rough handling. Tyler grabbed Troye's wrists and lifted them above his head, pinning them in place with his left hand while his right reached down to lift the hem of Troye's jumper and sneak inside to touch his warm, incredibly soft skin.

Tyler rolled his hips forward, pushing his arousal into Troye's hip with the intention of letting him know exactly what effect he had on him. He moaned when he felt a responding hardness press against his own. Gnawing at the mouthful of flesh in his mouth briefly, Tyler released it when Troye gasped, moving further up along his neck and licking as he went.

He backed away a step to lift Troye's jumper up and over his head and letting go of his wrists only to bunch the fabric up around them instead, effectively trapping them in a tight knot. Lowering them slowly, Tyler waited for Troye to open his eyes and look at him again before beginning to pull him along towards his bedroom.

Troye's eyes were darkened with lust and he didn't look away from Tyler once on their way there. His intense stare faltered a little, however, when Tyler didn't steer them toward the bed, but turned Troye around quickly to roughly push him to the wall by the foot of the bed instead.

Feeling himself smirk at the look of surprise on Troye's face, Tyler pressed himself forward to mutter close to his face. "Have you ever been taken up against a wall?"

He thrust his hips forward harshly, making both himself and Troye moan loudly at the sharp pleasure that shot through them from the friction.

"I seem to recall a close encounter with some shelves just yesterday," Troye teased back with a small smile once he'd regained his breath.

Tyler smiled despite himself as he leaned in further and tilted his head to lick at Troye's ear.

"I mean like this," he whispered, puncturing the last word with a firm push forward. "Face to face, with your legs wrapped around their waist?"

He purposely avoided saying 'his waist'. Just the thought of another man doing this with Troye sent Tyler's body into turmoil once again. Another sharp roll of his hips and Troye groaned as his head fell back with a dull thump when it hit the wall. Tyler dove right back down to Troye's neck and resumed leaving all kinds of marks on the skin there.

"No," Troye whimpered as his hands tightened on Tyler's shoulders. Troye seemed to realize then that Tyler was wearing more clothes than he was.

His hands scrambled to grab hold of the collar of Tyler's open button down, pushing it off his shoulders and arms and letting it fall to the floor. Tyler kept his slow, rolling movements going, pressing Troye back against the wall with his hips as he leaned back a bit and reached down to pull his t-shirt off. Once it was gone, he went to work on Troye's dark jeans, quickly undoing the button and zipper and pushing them down over his hips when they fell open.

Troye stepped out of his pants while reaching up to grab the hair at the back of Tyler's neck to pull him close again and tilting his chin up to signal that he wanted Tyler to keep sucking on his skin. Tyler groaned into the dip at the base of Troye's throat when he felt nimble fingers tugging at the closings of his own jeans, brushing against his erection where it pressed against the fabric. Tyler pulled his jeans and boxers down and off his legs before stepping back entirely and slowly eyeing Troye up and down.

"Stay right there and take 'em off," Tyler instructed and waited for Troye to start doing as he'd been told before he walked over to his night stand.

Tyler ripped open a condom package and rolled it on, reaching into the drawer to pull out his lube when he was done, not wanting to waste any time.

He turned back around and stalked back toward Troye, pleased to find him standing up to lean back against the wall where Tyler had left him, now completely naked. Popping open the bottle in his hand, he measured out a liberal amount of lube onto his fingers before snapping it shut and tossing it onto the bed beside them.

Troye was looking at him with darkened eyes and obediently widened his stance while grabbing hold of Tyler's shoulders again when Tyler reached around to start preparing him. Placing his other hand in between Troye's shoulder blades, Tyler pulled him forward to lean against his chest while his fingers worked at Troye's opening.

Troye slumped a little against him and turned his head so he could rest his cheek on Tyler's shoulder, drawing hitched breaths through his open lips.

If it wasn't for the burning lust he felt pulsing through his body, Tyler would have called the moment almost peaceful. However, it wasn't just his desire for the man in his arms that made him rethink - it was the lingering frustration in his blood that hadn't dissipated in the least since they left the park.

Bending his head down to lick hotly at the back of Troye's neck, Tyler added a third finger and heard Troye gasp.

"So who's this Sawyer?" Tyler grumbled against Troye's neck, noticing the goose bumps that rose under his lips when his breath washed over the dampened skin. He felt Troye shiver and Tyler's length hardened further in response to the involuntary reactions and clues that Troye's body always gave away to signal his pleasure. His hand tightened in its grip on Troye's back.

"What does he have to do with anything?" Troye breathed, but didn't move from his place on Tyler's shoulder.

"Nothing," Tyler insisted and clenched his jaw, feeling his stomach tighten in a similar way when Troye wouldn't answer his question. Tyler pulled out his fingers carefully and eased his grip on Troye's back to allow him to lean away.

Bracing his hands on Tyler's shoulders, Troye pushed himself upright again and looked at Tyler curiously. "He's just a friend."

Troye's voice was gentle but firm and he met Tyler's eyes evenly while Tyler reached down to cover his erection in the lubrication left on his hand. Tyler wiped whatever was left of the slipperiness onto his stomach to make sure he wouldn't drop Troye once he had him up and off the floor.

He walked forward, crowding Troye up to the wall again, and Troye closed his eyes slowly, leaning his head back while reaching up to tangle his fingers in Tyler's hair. He turned his face a bit to the side in open invitation for Tyler to nibble at the sensitive skin just under his ear.

"Yeah, he seemed very 'friendly'," Tyler continued around the small, sucking bites he peppered over Troye's neck. He bent slightly at the waist and grabbed at the backs of Troye's thighs, whispering "Up" while pressing his fingers into the flesh.

Troye seemed to understand quickly and gripped Tyler's shoulders tightly to carry his weight while allowing Tyler's hands to lift his feet off the floor by his legs.

"Are you jealous?" Troye panted and wrapped his legs around Tyler's waist, resting them above his hips and crossing his ankles at the small of his back.

"No," Tyler murmured deeply as he reached down to adjust his grip on Troye's bottom, settling him a bit higher and pushing him back with his chest. Troye didn't weigh much, but the wall added some well-needed balance to what they were about to do, as well as taking some of the strain off of Tyler's shoulders when Troye realized he could lean back fully and divide his weight between his legs and the wall behind his back.

"Because it would be a bit hypocritical of you if you were," Troye gasped when Tyler positioned himself against his entrance, his hands tightening a bit on Tyler's shoulders.

Tyler paused there and waited patiently for Troye to open his eyes again, and holding his gaze when he finally did.

"I'm not jealous," Tyler growled and pushed himself forward, feeling the moment the head of his length breached Troye's body.

Troye groaned and his fingers clutched at Tyler's skin as he squeezed his eyes shut, a small line forming between his eyebrows as Tyler sank steadily deeper. When he bottomed out, Tyler stayed there to get his bearings back, his own breathing labored as Troye's tight passage pulsed around him, once again adjusting to his size.

Troye opened his eyes after a few seconds and, from under his hooded eyelids, stared almost lazily back at Tyler over the short distance between them, his breath coming fast and hitched.

"Liar."

The single, whispered word was enough to make the raw emotions inside Tyler reach a boiling point, rendering him unable to deny the claim and making him lunge forward to press Troye tightly against the wall and sealing his lips over the expanse of skin just above his shoulder. He bit down just as he pulled his hips back and snapped them forward again, not giving Troye any warning or further time to adjust.

Tyler sucked harshly at the flesh under his mouth, knowing the dark purple mark would be visible for days, if not a week, on Troye's pale skin.

The satisfaction it gave Tyler to be marking Troye's skin like that was almost as heady as the pleasure that was building in his guts from his own punishing thrusts into Troye's body.

Using gravity to his advantage, Tyler released some of his hold on Troye's ass to allow him to sink deeper against Tyler's hips. Troye's legs clutched tightly around him, his heels pulling Tyler forward on every thrust and unknowingly aiding the motion when only trying to hang on. Their movements were fast and hard, desperate to reach their high while little droplets of perspiration began forming on their skin from the strain of their position.

When Tyler adjusted his angle, making his length brush against the sensitive bundle of nerves inside Troye, the moan tumbling out through Troye's open mouth carried Tyler's name.

Tyler stilled at the sound, his earlier desperation seeming to all but vanish when scorching heat gathered in his chest, making him want to give anything to hear it many times more.

"Again," Tyler murmured.

Troye blinked his eyes open, looking back at Tyler almost dazedly. "What?"

"My name," Tyler repeated, rolling his hips gently in contrast to the earlier punishing pace. "Say it."

Troye groaned, making the sound long and drawn out when Tyler continued to pump himself forward slowly but steadily. Tyler pressed them tighter against the wall and Troye's head fell forward, resting their foreheads together and making their sharp breaths mingle as it spilled from their lips.

Tyler's breath hitched at their closeness, the shortened space between them making it almost painful to look into Troye's eyes, their intense blue, now almost covered in black, seeming to set his blood singing. Tyler licked his lips and gasped when Troye's eyes flickered down to follow the movement, unintentionally snapping his hips forward.

Troye whimpered and lifted his gaze back to Tyler's quickly at the harsh thrust, his accent coming through strong as he whispered, " _Tyler_."

Hearing Troye say his name that way, trapped under the onslaught of his unwavering scrutiny, Tyler moaned and tilted his head. He heard Troye gasp softly and Tyler knew immediately what Troye thought was going to happen.

But he ignored the maddening temptation to close his lips over Troye's and settled them further back at the sharp corner of his jaw, pressing his mouth to Troye's skin in a weak imitation of what he really wanted to do.

If there was one thing Tyler had learned that day, it was to not break Troye's trust. He'd vowed to respect Troye's notion of the value of a kiss all those nights ago, and he wouldn't break his promise in the heat of the moment, only to have Troye turn him away afterwards. There was too much at stake in return for feeling Troye's lips against his and Tyler wasn't ready to risk it.

So instead, Tyler mouthed his way further down Troye's neck until he was breathing against a pronounced collarbone. He increased the speed of his thrusts again, feeling Troye's fingertips dig into the skin on the back of his shoulders. Their moans mingled as the intensity of their pleasure grew once more. It wasn't long before Troye was whimpering continuously, a clear sign that he was close to completion, and reaching between their bodies to tug at his own weeping length.

A few moments later, Troye's head lifted quickly. His neck strained as he shouted hoarsely, his body shuddering and convulsing as his orgasm pulsed through him. Tyler was pulled along over the edge when Troye's rippling muscles tightened mercilessly around him, the force of Tyler's eruption into bliss making his eyes clench shut and his hips jut forward sharply as he pulled Troye as close as he could.

When his muscles began to relax again, Tyler's knees shook from the strain of keeping the two of them upright. He carefully gathered Troye in his arms and turned them on the spot to lean forward over his bed, silently settling Troye on the covers. After pulling out slowly, Tyler turned and fell on his back beside Troye, staring unseeingly up at the ceiling.

As they rested there, listening to the sound of each other's labored breathing, Tyler couldn't help but wonder if Troye really would have denied him if he'd gone in for the kiss after all.

-


	11. Chapter 11

-  
Wiping distractedly at the evidence of his pleasure still left on his stomach, Troye listened silently to Tyler’s slowly calming breath, a myriad of thoughts fighting for attention in his mind.

Being lifted and taken up against that wall had not only been incredibly hot; displaying Tyler’s strength and appetite for being the dominant force while further revealing Troye’s enjoyment of submitting. It had also, almost ironically, placed them in a more intimate embrace than ever before – closer.

He’d been convinced that Tyler was going to kiss him. When Tyler had leaned in, staring at him the way that he had, Troye’s heart had jumped and sped up to beat hard in his chest. Troye had even closed his eyes in anticipation for the touch, his breath stuttering, only to open them again, like waking from an odd dream, when he’d felt Tyler’s lips on his jaw instead. A twinge of disappointment had filled him then, making his stomach tie up uncomfortably. He’d clung to Tyler, reeling with pleasure and something close to frustration while Tyler had skillfully coaxed him to orgasm.

Now that he had a chance to think about it without distraction, however, Troye was grateful that Tyler had seemed to think better of it. A heat of the moment thing was exactly what Troye didn’t want, because he knew he’d regret it after.

The uncertainty that still filled him when thinking about Tyler and the way he made his money assured Troye that leaving things the way they were was for the best. Even if it was tempting to give in and just let things fall where they may, Troye knew he was better off keeping tight reins on his emotions. It just wouldn’t do to develop feelings that ran any deeper than the light affection he felt for Tyler right now. Much like Tyler distanced himself from any heartbreak by viewing what he did as business deals, Troye had to make sure he didn’t allow Tyler much closer than he already was.

Of course, Troye knew he was contradicting himself by claiming distance one second and then lamenting over how little Tyler knew him the next.

But it was difficult to stay aloof when even the smallest thing that Tyler did – good or bad – affected him more than he could ever prepare for. And Tyler didn’t seem unaffected either, for that matter. Tyler might think he pulled off acting like he was this non-bothered, worldly man who’d seen and done it all. 

But while it was pretty clear who out of the two of them was in charge when it came to sex, at least initiating it, there was no question that Troye was still calling the shots, like he’d done ever since the event night that now seemed like a lifetime ago.

Troye didn’t view Tyler as someone who was easy to manipulate, though, and he had no desire to do so anyway. But much like an eager puppy, Tyler would follow Troye’s lead wherever he wanted things to go, and at the most give little nudges about alternative routes along the way. That much was evident by the little looks searching for approval, the deliberately lingering touches, the sparkle in his eyes when he realized he’d done something to please Troye or made him smile. Clues here and there that all aided Troye in becoming increasingly convinced that Tyler was softer at heart than the airy confidence he wore on the outside.

It was also quite clear that Tyler had been affected by the attention that Sawyer paid to Troye at the park, and the fervent tone in which he’d denied being jealous was a dead give-away of the complete opposite – even Tyler had to realize that.

The punishing sex they’d had just minutes earlier seemed like Tyler’s attempt to leave his mark, to make an imprint of himself on Troye’s body and mind. Troye smiled secretly at the ceiling above them as a thrill rushed through him; Tyler’s possessive streak was not only arousing in its intensity, but also strangely endearing. Although Tyler really had no business dictating what Troye did or who he wanted to see, it almost made him giddy to think that Tyler deemed Troye as ‘his’.

Coming to the conclusion that he’d had enough of the dizzying thoughts in his head for the time being, Troye decided to ease his own mood with a bit of teasing. Tyler always seemed to take great pleasure from watching Troye squirm, so perhaps it was only due time that he returned the favor, so to speak.

Troye allowed his smile to turn into a smirk.

“Sawyer’s a friend who’s not only straight, but also in a long term relationship with his high school sweetheart.”

Tyler huffed and sat up on his elbows to peer down at Troye over his shoulder, one of his eyebrows raised. Troye almost laughed at the sulking expression on Tyler’s face.

“Yeah, well I know all about those ‘straight’ guys, remember?” he grumbled before lifting himself up and wandering out through the door.

Troye heard water running in what he assumed was the bathroom and soon Tyler was walking back in with a towel in his hand. Catching the towel when Tyler tossed it at him, Troye sat up to watch as Tyler walked up to the head of the bed and tried to regain eye contact while wiping himself down quickly.

“Tyler. I’m not interested in Sawyer,” Troye emphasized in an even voice.

Tyler gave a short hum in response, but didn’t add anything else as he pulled down the covers on his bed, still not looking at Troye.

Smirking at the grumpy man lying down to lean against the headboard, Troye turned onto his hands and knees and crawled up the bed to settle on his side beside him. Leaning on his elbow to rest his head in his hand, Troye continued, “But seeing you get that worked up about it was kinda hot,” Tyler looked up at him, “and kinda cute.”

Tyler lost his doubtful expression like the flick of a switch, quickly perking up and smiling back at Troye. “You think I’m cute?”

And just like that, Tyler skillfully managed to turn the tables on him and took over the teasing atmosphere. Troye rolled his eyes and sighed exasperatedly at the ceiling, before looking back down at Tyler with a scowl and a firm, “That’s what you’re choosing to focus on here?”

“But you just said-” Tyler began, his smile widening.

“I take it back.” Troye was quick to jump in, but could do nothing to stop the smile spreading on his own lips, because who was he kidding? When Tyler turned on his charm, there was no way Troye could act annoyed even if he tried. Seeing that he’d managed to turn Tyler’s mood around helped in making Troye happier, too, of course.

Tyler laughed and fluttered his eyelashes; a quite disturbing image if you asked Troye.

“No can do! I’ve already taken it to heart – you think I’m cute,” he stressed the last words by poking a finger into the soft flesh of Troye’s waist.

Flinching back at the touch, Troye felt his eyes widen in what must have looked like fear. “Don’t.”

Tyler looked a bit taken aback for all of a fraction of a second before his smile turned leering. “You’re ticklish.” He said it like he was stating a fact, one which Troye was quick to deny.

“No, I’m not.”

“You so are,” Tyler drawled as he jabbed his finger at Troye’s waist again, more accurately now that he knew where to aim.

Troye yelped and grabbed Tyler’s hand to hold it away from him, sending Tyler the most menacing warning glare he could muster.

“Don’t even think abou- _Ah, Tyler_!” Troye screeched and fell on his back as Tyler went for the kill, tickling him relentlessly as he rose up to lean over Troye. Troye flailed and scrambled to get away from Tyler’s agile fingers.

Screaming giggles and pleads for mercy filled the room as Troye wiggled around on the bed, Tyler cackling with laughter all while Troye’s feet kept hitting the wall beside the bed as he kicked out in his attempts to escape.

“Okay, okay, you’ve proved your point! Please, stop!” Troye squealed through his giggles.

Tyler laughed as he gave one last jab before sitting back to grin at Troye, who was finally released to relax back into the tangled sheets, panting heavily.

“Sorry,” Tyler chuckled.

“No, you’re not,” Troye narrowed his eyes at Tyler, but couldn’t keep the frown from turning into a smile when Tyler laughed again. “You’re right; I’m not,” Tyler smiled as he leaned back against the pillows, and Troye quickly shuffled closer into the proffered space at Tyler’s side when he held out his arm in invitation.

Silence enveloped them for a moment, both lost in their own thoughts. Tyler played with Troye’s hair and Troye distractedly drew random figures and patterns with his fingers over Tyler’s chest before settling his palm flat in the gentle dip over his sternum.

“There’s no reason to be jealous,” he murmured, feeling Tyler’s heart speed up a fraction underneath his hand. “I’m not seeing anyone else.”

The fingers in his hair stilled momentarily before resuming their stroking, combing through his ruffled strands.

“Well, can you really blame me for wanting you all to myself?” Tyler replied, his soft tone matching Troye’s.

Despite the nagging voice in the back of Troye’s mind telling him how ridiculously absurd it was for Tyler to say and think such things, the voice was quickly drowned out by the swell of delight that rose inside Troye, spreading to his features in the form a smile. Wanting to give Tyler something in return, Troye searched for a way to relay the feeling without using words. Words could only complicate things at this point and make him admit more than he was willing.

So he sat up from their embrace, feeling Tyler’s hand tighten in his hair minutely before releasing it to trail down to his upper back, as if reluctant to end the physical contact. Tyler frowned in confusion tinged with a fragment of worry, probably from thinking that he’d said something wrong.

Troye smiled at him reassuringly, gathering the sheet over his lap and rolling his shoulders.

“Keep in mind that I’ve recently been doing some serious screaming, which is your fault, so this will probably be awful… But promise you won’t laugh,” Troye aimed a pointed look at Tyler, who only frowned deeper.

“What?”

“Promise,” Troye pressed, feeling a sudden burst of nervous butterflies in his belly. What if Tyler hated it? Troye wasn’t really sure if he could handle that, still stinging from the harsh reality of rejection that he had come to associate with anything to do with him singing while someone was listening. He felt the heat of a blush cover his cheeks as he waited for Tyler’s answer.

Tyler still looked like he didn’t have a clue what Troye was talking about, but after just a few seconds of hesitance, the frown fell from his face and Troye felt Tyler stroke his hand down his skin before coming to rest in the dip of his lower back, thumb brushing reassuringly over his spine.

“I won’t laugh,” Tyler assured, holding Troye’s gaze steadily.

Troye held eye contact a bit longer before closing his eyes and drawing a deep, steadying breath. He already had a song in mind, one he suspected that Tyler wouldn’t have heard before, but the melody was soothing and just haunting enough to be perfect for singing a cappella like this.

Once he sang the first note, Troye opened his eyes and looked unseeingly across the room at the opposite wall, focusing on the words of the lyrics and letting himself get lost in them. He never noticed Tyler’s fingers tightening their grip on his skin or the way he stared at him as if under a spell. The song took over Troye’s thoughts and only when the last note of the verse he’d been singing rang out of existence, making the room grow quiet once more, did he register that he’d closed his eyes again.

He blinked them open and looked back down to Tyler, trying to glean his reaction. Tyler wore an expression of stunned silence and Troye chewed at his bottom lip as he waited nervously for him to say something – anything.

Tyler’s eyes softened, as if finally focusing back on Troye instead of the faraway look they’d carried before, and the hand resting on Troye’s back lifted up to stroke softly over his cheek before cupping his jaw. The gentle gesture made Troye’s face flush again as he stared back at Tyler.

“You’re beautiful, Troye,” Tyler breathed.

Troye’s belly flipped pleasantly and the toothy smile that broke out over his face was purely involuntary. That didn’t stop Troye from ducking his head to try and hide it, though, a bashful huff leaving his lips. “Stop it.”

He lifted his hand to shove at Tyler’s side without any real force. “My singing so bad you have to find something totally unrelated to compliment me on?”

Tyler smiled slowly, his thumb brushing over Troye’s cheek again. “I’m thinking of it as a package deal, actually.”

The underlying weight of his words lightened with his easy smile, but Troye found he couldn’t quite meet Tyler’s eyes as he still felt his face heating. Neither could he find anything to say in response, so he was grateful when Tyler continued, “And, whatever problem all those people who rejected you had, it’s their loss. That was amazing.”

Tyler moved his hand down to rub slowly up and down Troye’s arm, almost as if comforting him, and Troye looked up and caught Tyler’s eyes again.

“You really think so, or are you just saying that to be nice?” Troye asked before he could think to stop the words from leaving his mouth. He knew he was coming off as needy and childish, and it was probably very annoying, but his insecurity about music had become instinctive, a gut reaction he couldn’t help but feel. And he hated that he was letting it show, because it made him feel even more vulnerable. He just hoped Tyler wouldn’t think that he was fishing for compliments; an attribute he disliked very much in others.

The hand on his arm stopped moving and curled around his elbow as Tyler fixed him with a serious look, and Troye had to put conscious effort into not looking away.

“You need to learn to accept the nice things people say about you, Troye. I really think you sing beautifully and I want to hear it again as soon as possible.”

Troye knew that Tyler was right about him having to improve on taking compliments to heart, and allowed himself to smile in response as he murmured, “Thank you,” before adding, “But that was a rare occurrence, so don’t get your hopes up.”

Tyler chuckled and Troye was glad that he seemed to understand that he wasn’t refusing to sing for Tyler ever again, just that it wasn’t something he’d do very soon.

“Okay,” Tyler smiled gently and nodded. “Then come here and nap with me. I’m exhausted,” Tyler said as he pulled at Troye’s arm, urging him to lie down beside him again.

Allowing himself to be tugged onto his side, Troye settled his lower body underneath the light covers and shifted into Tyler’s side, falling into the same embrace as they’d been in just minutes before. 

Tyler removed his glasses and placed them on the bedside table before settling his hand over Troye’s arm where he’d slung it across his chest. They slowly drifted off into a light slumber, the fingers of Tyler’s other hand splayed in Troye’s hair once more, and a shadow of a smile still on Troye’s lips.

-x-

The sun had settled a bit lower in the sky outside when Troye woke up again, signaling the impending arrival of evening and casting long shadows across Tyler’s bedroom, some of it hitting their skin where they rested.

Troye blinked his eyes open, but didn’t leave his spot on Tyler’s shoulder as he watched the lined pattern of the window blinds reflect onto the walls as it moved ever so slowly up toward the ceiling. He wasn’t thinking about anything in particular, just enjoying the peaceful moment of stillness while wrapped up and warm in Tyler’s arms.

Tiny specks of dust glinted and danced in the sunlight, jolted from their seemingly random paths when they happened to fall in line with the steady flow of breath leaving Tyler’s slightly open mouth. Pursing his lips, Troye blew gently out into the space in front of him, childishly fascinated by the way the sudden stirring of the air made the specks flurry and scatter like snowflakes swirling on the wind across a winter landscape. When the dust settled into a slower drift once more, he did it again.

There was no intake of breath or other movement to serve as forewarnings to the deep rumble that rose from the solid frame he was resting against, and Troye started and jumped slightly when Tyler suddenly murmured, “That tickles.”

The hand that had slid from Troye’s hair to rest on his shoulder squeezed him slightly and Troye chuckled quietly. He hadn’t realized his breath would rush across Tyler’s skin and lift him from his sleep.

“Sorry,” he whispered around a guilty smile. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Tyler’s head turned while he reached out in search for his glasses, the stretching of his upper body making Troye’s head shift and slide from his shoulder onto the pillows underneath. Troye grunted softly in displeasure at loosing his comfortable resting spot.

“That’s okay,” Tyler yawned, his voice a bit gravelly from sleep. “I need to start getting ready for tonight anyway.”

And just like that, Troye’s smile fell and felt as if his body deflated. Hadn’t Tyler said he had time off now after these past weeks? Troye hadn’t really planned on anything, but he had sort of hoped that… Actually, what had he hoped for? He didn’t really know, but it had made him happy to think that they could perhaps spend some time together without being reminded of the fact that Tyler would soon be off doing God knew what with God knew who.

“I thought you said you were free this weekend?” he murmured while staring at the ever-moving reflection of sunlight that was still lighting up the opposite wall through the open blinds.

Tyler gave a deep sigh and reached up to scratch his fingers through his hair. “I thought so too, but Becca called this morning and asked me to fill in for one of the newer guys who apparently just upped and walked out on a client just a few nights ago. Said he’d had enough,” Tyler shook his head.

“Which means the rest of us will have to pick up his slack and cover the bookings he’d already pulled in.” He turned his head and looked at Troye, unknowingly repeating his thoughts out loud when he continued, his voice tinged with remorse, “I’m sorry. I was really looking forward to having some time with you without interruption.”

Troye shrugged his shoulders, knowing he couldn’t blame Tyler for something he really had no control over. “Nothing you can do about it now. It’s not your fault anyway.”

Another sigh escaped Tyler’s lips as he reached over to lift Troye’s hand to his lips, kissing his palm lightly before setting their hands on his chest. “It seems like all I ever do is apologize to you. The really ironic part is that I’m sorry about that too,” Tyler said around a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“It’s okay, Tyler, I already said you don’t need to make any promises. That way you don’t have to apologize when you can’t keep them,” Troye gave a sad, but reassuring smile in return. “I’m a big boy, I’d understand.”

Tyler smiled a bit wider at that. “I know you are,” he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, quickly continuing before Troye could groan in annoyance. “But all joking and innuendo aside, I’m really grateful that you actually do understand… Not everyone would be so open-minded.”

Troye shrugged again, briefly looking away from Tyler as he recalled his first reactions to learning about Tyler’s job. He didn’t say anything to remind Tyler of it, though, wanting to leave that particular conversation topic lying for now. Instead he went for easy humor.

“I guess you’re lucky,” he said airily, feigning an arrogance he didn’t feel.

It had the desired effect, though, when Tyler laughed in response and began trailing his index finger lightly up Troye’s arm, following it with his eyes as he drew it past his shoulder, veering off to the side and continuing down his chest.

“I am,” he whispered, lifting his eyes to meet Troye’s again. But Troye didn’t get a chance to further examine the intensity of Tyler’s gaze, nor the stirring in his lower belly, when Tyler sat up on his elbows and glanced over at the clock.

“And as much as I’d love to stay here in bed with you, I am also running out of time,” he added as he lifted the covers and flung his legs off the side of the bed, leaving Troye feeling more than a little bereft as he rose from the mattress to walk over and disappear into his closet. “I’ll give you a ride home.”

Picking aimlessly at the sheet under his hand, Troye was reluctant to move, even if he knew he had to eventually. A few moments later, Tyler walked back out in a pair of sweats and was pulling a loose-fitting t-shirt over his head, and Troye watched him walk across the room and out into the bathroom. When he heard the faucet turn on, Troye slid from his spot between the sheets to go in search for his clothes.

He hadn’t had time to take in Tyler’s apartment when they’d arrived earlier, so once he was dressed and ready to go, he explored a bit while waiting for Tyler to emerge from the bathroom. He’d just found a pile of records when he heard Tyler speak up from behind him.

“I’m trying to build a collection.” Troye turned to look at Tyler, seeing him nod at the paper cover in his hand. “A record player makes them sound so much better – more genuine, if you know what I mean?”

Troye nodded and glanced back down at the record he was holding. He’d gleaned some modern artists in the pile while looking through it, but the writing on this was one boasted a compilation of ‘golden oldies’ from the 40’s and 50’s.

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Troye commented distractedly while scanning the song titles, finding the record a bit out of place and not at all what he envisioned Tyler would enjoy listening to. Tyler seemed to be able to read the slight confusion on his face and he chuckled while stepping closer to Troye’s side.

“An old friend gave me that one, saying I needed ‘educating on the classics’ if I was to be seen with him. It was meant as a joke, of course, but there’s no doubt in my mind that he was at least somewhat serious. He’s a bit posh, even if he won’t acknowledge it.”

Tyler’s voice held an undeniably affectionate quality that made Troye look back up at him curiously, wondering who this ‘friend’ might be and if that was all they were. Tyler’s smiling eyes met his and he paused before continuing, “It’s a shame we didn’t dance that night, Troye. It’s actually kinda fun when there’s a live band and everything.”

Still lost in thoughts of Tyler’s friend, Troye was surprised at the unexpected turn in the conversation, and lifted his eyebrows while shaking his head quickly.

“Oh, um… I don’t dance,” he said hesitatingly. “Well, I don’t know how to.” He shrugged while stepping forward to place the record back in the pile. A hand on his arm made him turn back around when he was done, and he was met by Tyler’s gently smiling face once more.

“Then I’ll have to teach you.” Troye was about to protest that he really didn’t see any point in learning how to dance, when Tyler laughed and added, “Not now, though, don’t worry. We really need to get going, actually, or I’ll be late.”

-x-

Troye was so distracted by his own thoughts during their drive that he didn’t reflect on the silence in the car, nor the fact that neither of them had said anything since leaving Tyler’s place. Not only was he still thinking of the old friend that Tyler had mentioned, leading to Troye wondering what he did when he wasn’t working and if he met with friends then, or kept to himself.

Troye was also thinking about Tyler being called into work and what that meant in terms of having any free time, even during his supposed time off.

This, in turn, lead to Troye wondering about what kind of ‘rules’ came with being attached to an escort agency. He was sure there were some dodgy businesses out there; that sort of came with the questionable legality of the trade as it was. There was no telling what kind of contracts they held over their ‘employees’, or the consequences that came from breaching them, and that last thought was what made Troye finally end the silence, growing suddenly worried.

“What would your employers say if they knew you were with me right now?” he asked, dropping his voice a bit in volume when he continued, “I mean, I’m not paying you to see me.”

Tyler seemed to take a moment to consider his answer, and Troye thought he spied a tensing of the hands that gripped the steering wheel.

“It’s none of their business how I spend my free time,” Tyler eventually replied, his words a bit clipped, making Troye wonder if he’d unintentionally hit a nerve. “I can do whatever,” Tyler glanced at Troye, “and whomever I want.”

As he turned back to look at the road ahead, Tyler probably failed to notice the way Troye’s face paled in color. Tyler’s words had made a sudden realization dawn on him, so glaringly blatant that he wondered why he’d never even considered its possibility before now. The thought was making his heart thunder in his chest and turning his stomach, leaving him feeling a bit nauseous.

“Have…” he tried before having to stop to swallow harshly when the word came out slightly choked. “Have you ever done this sort of thing with a client before? Before me?”

In the back of his mind, Troye had somehow allowed himself to believe that he was a rare deviance in Tyler’s life; that their arrangement – that he – was unique. Now, though, the ignorance of thinking such a thing made him feel stupid beyond words.

“No, I haven’t,” Tyler replied softly, looking over at Troye again, lingering a bit this time before focusing on his driving once more.

It made Troye feel better in a matter of seconds, his stomach settling almost instantly. Yet, the thought had been planted in his mind, and he knew it would probably take a long time before it left him.

Who was to say that Tyler wouldn’t meet someone else? Someone that appealed to him a lot more than Troye did, meaning he’d probably never hear from him again? If it could happen with Troye, then of course it could happen again, and any given day at that. Trying to convince themselves of anything else would be naïve.

“Oh,” was all Troye managed in response while his mind spun away into all sorts of scenarios.

“Why?” Tyler asked curiously.

“No reason, really.” Troye tried to sound casual but knew he probably failed since he was preoccupied by trying to think up something plausible to use as an excuse for his question.

“It’s just that I don’t know what to call this... thing. I mean, we’re not what I would call ‘friends with benefits’. So would that makes us, like, ‘fuck buddies’, or..?”

Troye trailed off, not sure where he was going and already regretting bringing it up. It made him sound clingy, and he was glad he’d stopped talking before saying ‘lovers’ or something just as stupid.

He heard Tyler sigh softly from his seat and Troye found he couldn’t really look at him, feeling his face flush as he pulled awkwardly on his jumper sleeves.

“We don’t have to label it if you don’t want to,” Tyler’s deep voice held a note of tenderness. “All I know is that I enjoy your company and I have a feeling you enjoy mine, too. There’s no need to call this something that wouldn’t sound right, anyway. And that’s kinda special, don’t you think?”

Tyler reached out with his right hand to take hold of Troye’s, weaving their fingers together over the centre console. “That no already existing word fits?”

While a smile crept onto Troye's lips at the gesture, what Tyler was saying didn’t really comfort him the way he probably intended it to. Of course no other word could describe what they had, because Troye doubted that their situation was common enough to warrant its own description. And he wasn’t entirely sure that was a good thing.

“Yeah… I guess so,” he murmured just as Tyler pulled the car up to his building.

They parted with Tyler’s usual promise of keeping in touch. Despite the eventful day, with Troye’s emotions running in all kinds of directions, it ended on a pensive note which left Troye feeling as if their conversations had raised more questions than they'd actually provided answers.

As he eventually sank deep into the cushions of his couch, TV on but ignored in the background, Troye considered his options while digging behind his throw-pillows until he found what he was looking for, resting back once more as he stared at it.

He’d been adverse to the thought of investing any more feelings as recently as earlier that very day, but the idea of Tyler suddenly not being interested anymore stirred uneasily within him. If Tyler decided he’d had enough and stopped calling, Troye realized that he’d be as lonely as he was before they’d met, if not lonelier now that he’d had a taste of what it could be like to not be. And Troye figured he could do a lot worse than Tyler, even with all of his faults - or at least the one that Tyler really had no control over unless he quit his job, which didn’t seem very likely.

Troye knew that he’d not been a very active instigator whenever they met, apart from that one time when he’d suddenly found himself taking the lead. That had been more out of lust than any genuine desire to reciprocate, however.

Slowly running the silky, grey tie through his fingers, Troye debated if it wasn’t in his best interest to start showing Tyler that he actually cared, after all.

-


	12. Can I Lay By Your Side?

-

Tyler rubbed the towel briskly over his hair a few more times before yanking it from his head with a bit more force than necessary, making it slap wetly against the sink when it fell. The bright lights of his bathroom, as well as the lack of his glasses made him squint a bit at his own image in the mirror above the sink. He stared at himself for a few moments, taking in the hint of puffiness under his eyes, the way his hair could do with a trim, and the dull gloom of his countenance. Sighing deeply, he shook his head before turning to hang up his towel and reaching for the hair dryer to begin his styling routine.

His mind was preoccupied, though not by the upcoming dinner and 'additional service' appointment he had this evening. What was going through his mind instead were thoughts of a man with a bright smile, a hesitant yet fierce nature, and eyes so wide and blue and beautiful that Tyler could drown in them and die a happy man. What - or rather who - occupied his mind was Troye.

It was late afternoon the Saturday after he'd seen and spoken to Troye last. Tyler hadn't been in touch like he'd promised he would be and guilt had begun to take small, painful bites out of him. Still he couldn't bring himself to call or show up unannounced at Troye's door like he'd had no problem with doing before. And, really, this wasn't the first time he'd found himself lost in thoughts about Troye, but it was all different now. It was different because Tyler's outlook on his and Troye's... arrangement was different. The dynamics had changed, at least on Tyler's part, from a flirtatious, carnal fling to something... else.

It had happened when he got back from dropping Troye off a week ago.

He'd planned out an outfit that would fit the requirements that his client had left for meeting at a bar downtown, mentally picking the shirt that would go with that certain pair of black jeans and the black suede derbies to match. When he'd looked over the shoes standing in neat rows underneath the shirts in his closet, however, Tyler couldn't seem to find the pair he'd planned on wearing. Having been pressed for time, Tyler huffed in annoyance and started roughly pushing the shirts aside to be able to see his shoe collection better. Still not able to find the derbies he wanted to wear, Tyler had lifted his gaze to the top shelf where he kept the pairs he didn't wear that often in their boxes and began sorting through them quickly.

When he'd pulled out a box that was crammed in further toward the back corner, a flutter of black fabric had tumbled from the shelf as he pulled the box over the edge and into his hands. Tyler's movements stilled in recognition. He'd almost forgotten about putting it there.

With a swooping sensation in his belly, Tyler had put the shoe box aside and bent to pick up the black t-shirt lying in a crinkled pile by his feet. Handling the shirt with a care that resembled the way one would treat a piece of delicate bone china, Tyler had caressed the soft, worn fabric between his fingers as he stared at it. It was the shirt that Troye had given him to wear the morning after their first encounter. Once he'd gotten home that day, Tyler had stowed it away, wanting to keep it separated from the rest of his clothes as a memento of sorts.

Lifting his hands to his face, Tyler had pressed the fabric to his nose, inhaling carefully and immediately being hit with Troye's familiar scent. It wasn't the cologne he sometimes wore or the detergent he used for his clothes; it was the deep, oddly warm scent that was him, that was inherently Troye, and it had made a small smile spread on Tyler's lips while a flutter filled his chest. Not even an hour had passed since Troye had stepped out of his car, yet being reminded of him then had made Tyler acutely miss having him around already.

And that had been the moment when Tyler felt something fundamental shift inside of him, making his smile fall into a confused frown.

Slowly backing out of the closet, with the t-shirt still in hand, Tyler had suddenly been unable to focus on much else but the flurry of confusion in his mind and the heavy thudding of his heart. He'd felt ambushed, struck, yet unable to even begin to understand what had happened, leaving him startled and almost frightened.

He'd turned toward the bed then, where the sight of the tangled, empty mess of his sheets had accentuated the absence of another person lying there, as if their earlier presence had left an imprint that couldn't be erased even after it was gone.

What was missing was Troye.

Tyler gasped around the sudden intense longing that bloomed in his chest. Troye should be there, resting in Tyler's bed, smiling lazily and blinking sleepy yet bright eyes at him as his languid body reached out for Tyler to come back and join him, to come rest with him in a tangle of limbs and slow, steady breathing.

Slowly moving forward, Tyler had turned to slump onto the edge of the mattress, letting his head fall into his hands as the room spun, cradling the soft cotton of the t-shirt against the side of his face. His ears had been ringing when a thought suddenly dawned on him and his heart had skipped a beat when he found an explanation for the yearning he felt. It had hit him with the unexpectedness and force of an avalanche going off in his mind, dumping him in shocking sobriety.

Without meaning to or even being aware of it happening, Tyler had let himself do the last thing a person with his occupation should ever do – fall in love.

The realization had left him breathless and desperately scouring his memories in search of the moment when he'd let things get to this, when he'd allowed Troye too close to his heart. But it was a futile search because there was no one moment; it had happened slowly, over time, carefully etching itself into Tyler's subconscious, until its presence had grown too large and too bold for it to go unnoticed anymore.

Tyler had slowly realized that all the signs had been there. The way his chest squeezed when Troye had told him over the phone that nothing compared to the feel of him.

The way his own body had felt like it was filled with scorching lava at the jealousy he felt when Troye responded to the attention of another man.

The way his heart filled and grew by increments every time Troye shook with pleasure in Tyler's arms. The signs had all been there; he'd just been too blind to see them.

And so there Tyler was, in the aftermath of his elevated awareness, not knowing what to do. He was lost. He let himself blindly spiral off into a whirlpool of unwanted emotions and he was utterly and completely lost. The swirling force had him in its grip; he was in too deep and there was no way he'd make it out unharmed now that he knew that his heart had given itself over to Troye freely yet still without his knowledge.

Hence the state he was currently in, looking like he hadn't had a good night's sleep in a week - which wasn't far from the truth at all. Tyler felt like he was straying off course and fumbling blindly in the dark. During years of dealing with matters of the body, he'd fiercely avoided having to deal with matters of the heart. It scared him. Where did this leave him?

Where did it leave them?

Tyler turned off the hair dryer and reached for his styling paste, scooping some of the sticky substance onto his fingertips and rubbing it between his palms before beginning to run his hands through his hair.

He had no idea what to do from here on out. Everything would be different now. Tyler knew that he wasn't a good enough actor to pull off trying to hide his newly acquired understanding from Troye. If he tried, he suspected that Troye would be able to see right through him, glean that something was up, and probably ask all kinds of uncomfortable questions about it. Questions that Tyler wasn't willing to answer.

And that was the reason Tyler had stayed away from any attempt at contact in the past week. Because he wasn't sure that he would be able to keep from accidently revealing how he felt. He had, after all, no idea how Troye would react if he knew.

It was a complex situation; on one hand Tyler wanted to be with Troye so much his chest ached with it. On the other, he wanted to run as fast and as far as he could in the opposite direction and never look back. The thought of Troye distancing himself from Tyler because of something like this was too frightening to contemplate. Tyler knew without a shadow of a doubt that he'd surely break if he messed things up now. Yet, he wasn't stupid enough to not realize that his heart would be broken either way, since feeling like this could never lead to anything. Troye - intelligent, beautiful, perfect Troye - would never go for a man like Tyler; someone sullied.

Whichever way things went from here, Tyler was bound to be hurt in one way or another. There was an overwhelming sense of 'damned if you do; damned if you don't' over the entire situation and Tyler wasn't willing to let himself be sent to his damnation just yet.

He knew he couldn't avoid Troye forever and that the younger man was probably beginning to wonder why he hadn't heard from Tyler all week when he'd said he would. Tyler's stomach squeezed a bit in discomfort when he thought of the guarded look on Troye's face when he'd said that he'd understand if Tyler couldn't keep his promises. Tyler wanted to keep his promises, and under normal circumstances, he always did. But this situation was far from normal and now, all Tyler wanted to do was hide and never have to face Troye or the disappointment and sting of rejection that he knew lurked just around the corner.

So Tyler threw himself into his work instead, trying to block out all thoughts of cerulean blue eyes, or laughter as clear as bells, with the nameless, faceless clientele that expected nothing more from him than what he could offer on a purely physical level.

Tyler had seen it happen before; one of his colleagues becoming caught up with a client in one way or another. It was a rookie mistake that seemed so distant from ever happening to him again that he'd never even considered it as a possibility. Tyler knew better than that and he'd been doing this for long enough to know the unwritten rules of the trade by heart - always make sure your client feels like he's the centre of your attention, always make sure you leave your client satisfied, and never, ever let yourself fall for a client. Breaking the last rule tended to end in bad situations, and the guys that did became cautionary tales that travelled by word of mouth and were told to newbies upon their signing up with an agency.

Tyler didn't want to end up as a cautionary tale. He'd come close to being one once before and it was something he never wanted to repeat. Besides, Tyler enjoyed doing what he did and he'd promised himself years ago that no man would ever control him or his emotions again. And although Troye wasn't technically a client of his, that didn't change the fact that Tyler wasn't _willing_ to give himself over to him, no matter how much he _wanted_ to.

Securing the last tuft of wayward hair into place, Tyler rinsed his hands under the faucet while checking over his image in the mirror. It'd have to do. He didn't have time to try to work miracles tonight. Time was already drawing close to when he'd have to be out the door and on his way to his appointment, and he needed to get dressed too.

He rushed out of the bathroom after drying his hands haphazardly and hurried to his bed where he'd laid out the outfit to start quickly pulling on his clothes. Just as he was sitting down to tie up his shoe laces, his phone started ringing from where it lay charging on his night stand.

Huffing in exasperation, Tyler leaned over and reached to grab it, yanking the cord from it when he sat back up to look at the caller-ID. He lifted an eyebrow in confusion over seeing the name that flashed across the display before tapping the green button and quickly lifting the phone to his ear, already opening his mouth to speak.

"This isn't a really good time, Tom. I'm really rushed-" Tyler began before the voice on the other end cut him off.

"Oh, this won't take long!" Tom's swift words carried an apologetic tone as he rushed on. "I know I haven't gone through the proper channels this time, but I just wanted to see if you were free to come over for lunch tomorrow? I understand if you're busy," he added, leaving the invitation open for Tyler to easily decline if he wanted to.

Tyler felt his shoulders relax and a small genuine smile fell over his lips for the first time in days. He didn't have to think long before giving his answer. "Actually, that sounds just perfect," he smiled and breathed a little bit easier. He could do with a friendly face and some distraction that didn't involve having to act all breezy and composed.

"Lovely! I'll expect you around noon then?" Tom asked cheerfully.

"Okay," Tyler chuckled softly. "I'll see you then."

"Oh!" Tom's voice brightened even more. "And bring that boyfriend of yours! I'm dying to meet him."

Tyler paused and felt his smile falter. There really wasn't any chance of him actually managing to avoid being reminded of Troye every few seconds, was there?

"He's not my boyfr-"

"Great!" Tom interrupted before Tyler could finish. "Does he eat rooster?"

Tyler couldn't keep from snorting out a laugh at that. If there was anything Tom always managed to do, it was to instantly brighten Tyler's mood. "Good word choice, Tommy."

Then, taking a deep breath, Tyler stretched his back and lifted his head before exhaling on a sigh. "I'll see what I can do about bringing Troye."

"Alright," Tom conceded gently. "I'll see you tomorrow, Tyler."

"Bye," Tyler finished before hanging up. He stared down at his phone, wondering if it could be a good opportunity to meet Troye on somewhat neutral ground when others were around, rather than being alone with him first thing after realizing his feelings. It couldn't hurt to ask if he wanted to, at least.

Tyler rose from his seat and stuffed his phone in his pocket. Coming to the conclusion that he'd call Troye when he got back later that night, he quickly finished getting ready and was out of the apartment in a matter of minutes, consciously straightening his back and schooling his features into an aloof smirk.

-x-

He managed to keep his confident persona intact through dinner with his client and all the way back to the guy's place before Tyler felt his carefully honed façade begin to slip.

The man practically threw himself on Tyler the minute they stepped inside the door, having obviously decided that they'd done enough talking and wanted to move onto the physical part of their deal. Looping his arms around Tyler's neck, he tilted his head while moving in closer.

Tyler quickly lifted his hands to press them against his chest and leaned away to say what had become somewhat of a mantra lately.

"No kissing," he said a bit harsher than he'd intended, and the guy blinked his eyes open to frown slightly at him. As soon as the words left his mouth, Tyler paused at hearing himself say them. Boy, had he been truly and utterly blind...

An image of smiling full lips tinted an almost unnatural red flashed across his mind and Tyler shook himself out of his thoughts. Quickly wanting to placate the frowning man in front of him, he murmured through a smirk, "But everything else is okay; whatever you wanna do."

Tyler trailed his hands suggestively down over the man's chest, splaying them out to rest on his waist. Slowly, he mirrored Tyler's smirk and seemed to regain his urgency when he suddenly went to work on the buttons of Tyler's shirt, opening them with quick tugs.

"How about you just fuck me then, yeah?" the man breathed, his Scottish brogue coming through strong along with a hint of alcohol on his breath.

Tyler prayed that he wouldn't ruin his shirt by ripping any of the buttons off and silently accepted when the guy leaned in to start licking at his throat. The man was only slightly older than Tyler, somewhere in his early thirties, and not that bad-looking at all. He had a thick, dark mop of hair on his head, the beginnings of a five o'clock shadow, and an accent that hadn't been all that pronounced before he'd gotten a few drinks in him at the restaurant.

Tyler usually liked a man with an accent, but the way "laddie" here was currently rutting against him and sloppily moving his tongue over his jaw made him quickly lose any iota of interest he might have had at the start of the night.

Wanting to just get it over with quickly so he could go home, Tyler inclined his head at a door further inside the apartment and to the left. "That the bedroom?" he asked and the man lifted his head to glance over his own shoulder and nodded as he looked back to Tyler with hazy blue eyes.

"Then what are we doing standing out here?" Tyler continued and consciously widened his smirk, even if it was a bit of a struggle. "Get in there and get naked."

The man smiled and nodded again before he turned to lead them toward the bedroom, where things moved a bit quicker after that. Tyler let himself get lost in the routine of pleasuring another man to the best of his abilities, and he was just about to reach for a condom, when he lifted his gaze to the eyes of the man who moved restlessly underneath him.

The blue of their irises made him pause. The color wasn't anywhere near the same as the eyes that haunted his dreams but it was close enough to make his breath catch in his throat.

No. He shouldn't - wouldn't - do this to himself!

Tyler closed his eyes tightly for a moment to compose himself and when he opened them again, he was pleased to see that the other man hadn't seemed to notice his brief lapse in focus. Tyler quickly continued to prepare himself, making fast work of the condom and lube. The man underneath him had thankfully stopped moaning exaggeratedly at every minute movement that Tyler made and was gripping Tyler's waist when he lined himself up.

Tyler let his eyes fall closed and began pressing forward. The tightness and warmth of another body surrounding him had Tyler not even noticing when his mind started to wander off to places he'd rather be than there. At least not until the body in his arms suddenly froze, making Tyler stop his movements and open his eyes to give the Scotsman a questioning look.

The dark haired man was frowning back at him.

"My name's Greg," the man said around his panting breath.

Tyler blinked.

"What?"

"I said; my name's Greg," the man repeated. "You just called me Troye."

All breath was suddenly pushed from Tyler's lungs and he felt as if the room tilted slightly around him as his eyes widened to stare at the man still holding him in an intimate embrace. He blinked again, holding himself very still before he regained all his senses at once.

It was no use. He had to get out of there and he needed to... He needed to see Troye.

"Look. I'm sorry but I can't do this," Tyler apologized as he started backing away, quickly scurrying off the bed and reaching for his underwear and pants. "Don't worry, I'll give you your money back."

He didn't dare look up at the man still lying panting behind him as he stood to close up his zipper and began searching for his shirt.

" _What_?!" came the incredulous voice from the bed. "After all that? I was told you were one of the best!"

Tyler turned around after having found his shirt hanging over a chair by the door and buttoned it haphazardly, not wanting to waste another minute with a man he felt nothing for, and cared even less about.

"Yeah? Well, things change," he said levelly while looking at the Scotsman, who was currently trying to cover himself up with a corner of his bedcover. "I'll leave the money on the counter."

And with that, Tyler picked up his shoes and headed out toward the door, leaving a wad of bills on the counter that lined the kitchen on the way. It was only when he'd finally pulled the door of his car shut beside him that Tyler groaned and let his head fall back against the headrest in defeat.

What the hell had he just done?

He lifted his hands to his face and groaned again, this time muffling the sound with his palms. He was fucked. He'd just gone and walked out on a client who hadn't done anything wrong, which was pretty much like signing his own release form from the securest representation he'd ever had at any agency. Tyler would be lucky if they ever wanted anything to do with him again, despite his years of flawless service.

Tyler pressed his fingertips into his closed eyes under the lenses of his glasses briefly before lowering his hands with a sigh. He didn't see any good coming from going home to his empty apartment after this, and the niggling longing for the man that he knew could make it all seem a little bit more distant was once more growing stronger within him.

Before he could change his mind about it, Tyler pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contacts until he found Troye's number. The dial signals seemed to go on forever after he'd lifted the phone to his ear. Tyler felt a knot start to form in his throat, hoping that Troye would pick up, and he jumped slightly when the call finally connected.

"Tyler, hi!"

The smile that spread over Tyler's lips was instinctual and a swooping sensation rolled through his stomach at hearing Troye's sleepy yet happy voice greet him through the small speaker.

"Hey, you," he replied and looked down at the small digital clock on his dashboard, glad to see that it was just nearing 11 p.m. "Did I wake you up?"

"Nah, I'm just watching a movie," Troye explained before Tyler heard him yawn. Tyler chuckled softly and felt his heart fill with warmth as he imagined Troye being adorably sleepy and ruffled, all snuggled up on his couch. "What about you?"

Troye's question brought Tyler back to the present and he hesitated slightly, his smile faltering a bit.

"Actually, I was just wondering... Can I come over?"

There was a short pause before Troye replied with a simple, "Yeah."

"Okay." Tyler smiled again and reached over to place the key in the ignition. "I'll see you in a few minutes, alright?"

"Can't wait," Troye replied softly before the call disconnected.

Lowering the phone from his ear, Tyler peered down at the display curiously. His mind was surely playing tricks on him, but what he thought he'd heard made swallow slowly around a thrill in his chest. He put his phone away and quickly turned the key to start his car before pulling out on the street and driving off towards Troye's apartment block.

Once there, after a drive that felt much longer than it normally did, he briskly jogged up the stairs to the right floor. He was only slightly out of breath when he finally knocked on Troye's door and tried to calm his racing heart while he waited.

The lock clicked and the door opened to reveal a young man wearing a small smile, sweatpants and a light blue t-shirt, and Tyler's heart fluttered uncontrollably at seeing Troye for the first time since he'd learned its true desires.

Troye nudged his head backwards and stepped back to allow Tyler inside. And for the first time since they'd met, Tyler wasn't really sure what to do.

He pulled the door closed behind him and turned to face Troye again, who was running a hand through his loose curls and looking at him expectantly. God, he really was beautiful.

"Hi, gorgeous," Tyler breathed, suddenly nervous.

The smile on Troye's lips widened at the pet name and Tyler wondered if it really was possible for a pair of eyes to sparkle, because if so, Troye's did. Tyler wasn't ready for Troye to step closer, but he recovered quickly when a pair of long arms suddenly wound themselves around his neck and a cheek pressed against his own as Troye pulled him into a warm hug. Tyler lifted his arms to wrap them around Troye's waist and pulled him even closer, sighing softly into their embrace.

It was amazing, really; Troye somehow knowing that this was exactly what Tyler had needed and he was so glad he'd braved the decision to call him.

"I've missed you," Troye whispered close to Tyler's ear and Tyler hummed in response, resting his chin against Troye's shoulder. "I haven't heard from you all week."

The reminder made Tyler's pulse beat a bit faster and he opened his eyes, not having realized he'd closed them. The nervous tingle was back in his belly again and when a soft pair of lips kissed the skin beneath his ear, Tyler flinched away from the touch before he could think about what he was doing. 

He felt Troye stiffen slightly in his arms and when Tyler stepped back to look at him, his chest squeezed painfully at the wounded tinge within the questioning gaze that Troye aimed at him.

"Sorry, I'm just a bit distracted. There's been a lot on my mind and I..." Tyler sighed and hoped that Troye would understand without having to go further into detail. The weariness inside him made his body feel heavy where they stood and all he really wanted to do was rest.

He held Troye's gaze as he continued, "Would it be alright if I just... if I just held you? Just to sleep?"

Tyler knew that he sounded like a sappily romantic love song but he held his breath as he watched an odd expression flitter across Troye's features. Tyler tried to fill his eyes with all the adoration he held towards the man in his arms to show that he wasn't rejecting him; he just needed something other than sex right now.

"Oh," Troye said shortly before he seemed to recover from his surprise at Tyler's new stance on things, which, to him, would probably seem to have come from out of the blue. "I mean, yes, of course. That's fine."

Troye's lips lifted in a small smile, and Tyler found himself smiling back gently as his lungs started working again. He pulled Troye closer again and leaned up to peck his cheek.

"Thank you," he murmured against Troye's skin before backing away again. "Can I just go wash up a bit real quick?"

Troye smiled and nodded. "Sure, just don't take too long; I'm kinda tired as well. I might fall asleep while waiting in bed."

Tyler's stomach did that swooping thing again at the mention of Troye waiting for him to come to bed with him and at the strangely domestic feeling that thought brought with it. He didn't say anything more, though, before hurrying off towards Troye's bathroom to wash his face and the skin down his neck, wanting to rid himself of any trace of his earlier client.

Thinking of the Scotsman he'd left practically sputtering in indignation made nerves settle in Tyler's gut again. It was only a matter of time before he heard from the agency now and they were not likely to be happy with him. Tyler normally knew better than this and he really wasn't usually this self-deprecating either. But this was starting to become all too familiar, reminding him of events that were so distant now that it seemed almost as if they'd happened in a past life. And in an oddly poetic kind of way, they sort of had. Though, the distance didn't seem to matter when Tyler once again found himself frowning at memories that slowly began to surface from the recesses of his mind.

Hurriedly drying his hands and face on Troye's towel, he stepped over the threshold of Troye's bedroom just a few moments later and lifted his gaze to the bed. The room was slightly lit by the lamp on the window sill and Tyler could see Troye already tucked in with the covers wrapped around his bare shoulders. Tyler's chest ached at the sight, knowing that this man - this vision - would never truly be his.

Troye's eyes fluttered open and met with Tyler's across the room and Tyler drew a deep breath when Troye lowered one side of the covers in invitation. Tyler lifted his hands to his collar and started to unbutton his shirt while walking into the room and pausing at the side of the bed, still keeping his eyes locked with Troye's. They watched each other silently while Tyler undressed, and once he'd stepped out of his pants, leaving him only in his boxer briefs, he kneeled on the edge of the mattress and slipped in under the covers next to Troye.

Tyler had just settled back against the pillow when Troye immediately shifted closer, winding his arm around Tyler's chest and resting his head on his shoulder in the same manner he usually did. A soft sigh left Tyler's lips as Troye's body warmed his skin once again and wrapped his own arms around him as Troye shifted slightly to get comfortable. Yet Tyler couldn't bring himself to relax the same way that Troye had, resting heavily against him.

After long minutes of silence, during which Tyler's mind spun away with him as he stared out into the room, a quiet murmur brought Tyler out of his reverie.

"Tyler?"

"Hm?" Tyler hummed to show that he was listening.

"What's wrong?"

The hesitant quality of Troye's words carried a tint of worry and Tyler tightened his arms around him in what he hoped was a comforting gesture.

"Nothing," Tyler lied, feeling his throat close up tightly, making his words come out raspy. "It's nothing you should have to worry about anyway. Just... sleep."

Tyler closed his eyes on a long exhalation when he felt Troye shift and lean up to look at him.

"Well, I can't sleep when I can practically hear you thinking," Troye argued gently. "Why don't you tell me what's on your mind?"

Tyler opened his eyes to look up at Troye where his head was lifted to rest in his hand. "Because it's stuff I'd rather forget," Tyler replied and looked away, hoping that that would be the end of it and that Troye would stop insisting that he should share more than he was willing to.

"Maybe talking about it will make it better. I'm a good listener..." Troye trailed off, leaving the unspoken suggestion hanging in the air between them.

Tyler sighed heavily, knowing that he really shouldn't tell Troye this. He shouldn't give Troye more pieces of himself than the ever growing part of his heart that he already had.

"It's in the past, Troye. No reason to dwell on it."

"Tyler." Troye's voice was firmer this time. "I want to know. Please?"

The imploring tone of that last word made Tyler turn his head to look at Troye, meeting his steady gaze. Perhaps it wouldn't be all that bad if he told him. If nothing else, then maybe Tyler would have some relief in saying it out loud for the first time.

Taking a deep breath, Tyler turned away again to stare at the soft glow of the little lamp on the window sill, knowing that he wouldn't be able to get a single word past his lips if he was to keep looking at Troye.

"I had just left home when I met him," Tyler began, biting his lip when he felt Troye tense minutely beside him. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

After a few silent seconds, the warm brush of Troye's hand settled over his shoulder, and the slow movement of his thumb across Tyler's skin urged him to go on. Swallowing around the sudden lump in his throat, Tyler continued levelly, "I was 17 and he was 29. This was way before I was signed to any agency and I was pretty much living day by day on the streets. I was cruising in a bar one night and I saw him sitting there alone, trying to drown his sorrows.

“At the time, I was just starting to be able to spot the type of guy who'd be willing to pay for some physical comfort, so I sat down next to him and we started talking. Turned out his wife was filing for a divorce and had left to be with her lover somewhere in a tropical paradise. As the night wore on, he loosened up considerably, and one thing led to another – as they do - and we hooked up.

“The thing was that he didn't want me to leave after. In fact, he begged me to stay. So I sort of never left. For months, we shared his big house together; just the two of us, and it was the best time I'd ever had. I even wrote my dad a letter saying I was glad he'd kicked me out because I was so much happier living there than I ever was at home."

Tyler paused for a moment, noticing that Troye's fingers had stilled when Tyler let him in on the fact that he hadn't actually ran away from home, like he'd told Troye the first time they'd talked about his occupation.

When Troye's fingers resumed their slow caress again, seeming to accept his slight bending of the truth, Tyler went on. "He... He did everything right, you know? Said all the right things. He spoiled me rotten and promised me forever. I was 17 and I believed him, because when you're 17 it never occurs to you that someone would lie about the kinds of things he told me.

“But he did. He _did_ lie, and when his wife suddenly wanted him back, I was out on the street again before I even realized what was going on. I was alone again. The man who'd taken me in and made me believe I was finally worth something to someone just dropped me in a heartbeat... After that, I made a vow to myself to never let anyone else get the opportunity to do that to me again. And that's how I ended up doing this more or less ever since. He was the reason that I chose to continue to sell my body, but not my heart, all those years ago..."

Tyler breathed in deeply and closed his eyes. "His name was Ryan, and I loved him," he finished on the exhaling breath, making the words sound almost as hollow as he felt while saying them.

A hesitant silence followed and Tyler held his breath as he waited for Troye to speak. His hand had stilled on Tyler's arm again and Tyler was afraid that he might have said too much. Troye didn't deserve to have to listen to him complaining about things that really shouldn't matter anymore. And he really didn't deserve it now that Tyler knew how he felt about him. That's a great way to show someone that you care about them, huh? Tell them sob stories about your fucked-up past as a hustler.

"I'm so sorry, Tyler." Troye's whisper sounded thick and Tyler glanced back at him, immediately shocked by the sight of unshed tears in Troye's eyes. "I'm so sorry that that happened to you and if there was a way for me to make it undone, I would. In a heartbeat."

Tyler's heart swelled in his chest, yet he felt almost guilty about it doing so. Troye didn't mean it the way Tyler wanted him to mean it. So he shrugged one of his shoulders and shifted his gaze down to where his fingers were trying to smooth out the little wrinkles in the thin duvet. It hadn't been that many days ago that Tyler had been the one comforting Troye. Oh, how the tables had turned.

"There's no way to change the past, Troye. What happened, happened; I was young and stupid. I know a lot better now." Or at least, he ought to, Tyler thought to himself.

"No one should be treated like that... least of all you," Troye insisted gently. "You're worth so much more than you give yourself credit for, Tyler."

Troye's arm pulled him closer as he settled back onto his side and Tyler tucked his head in under Troye's chin, letting himself be held close to his chest. The new composition of their embrace made Tyler feel oddly small yet it wasn't making him feel weak. Troye's arms held him securely and for the first time in a long while, Tyler suddenly felt like he could breathe a little easier. Doing just that, Tyler inhaled deeply, comforted by Troye's scent surrounding him, and wrapped his arms around his waist, snuggling even closer.

And then a thought occurred to him. Thinking that now was as good time as any to ask, Tyler whispered against Troye's skin. "My friend called earlier and invited me to lunch tomorrow. He, um... He asked me to bring you with me." Tyler paused. "You don't have to if you don't-"

"Yes," Troye interrupted Tyler's slightly rushed explanation. "It would be great to meet one of your friends. I'll come with you." There was a smile in Troye's voice and Tyler relaxed again when he noticed his shoulders had tensed up a bit. "How does he know about me, though?"

Troye's words were teasing and Tyler felt himself blush where his face was still pressed against Troye's skin.

"I have no idea," Tyler murmured quietly and smiled when Troye's chest shook a bit with silent laughter.

"Of course you don't." Troye sniggered before Tyler felt him plant a kiss on the top of his head. "Of course you don't," Troye repeated in a whisper against Tyler's hair, letting the room fall silent once more.

Tyler shifted to nudge one of his legs in between Troye's underneath the covers, settling again with a sigh of content and, just a few minutes later, he fell into an easy slumber.

-x-

Tyler woke with a start at the sound of his phone going off in his pocket out in the living room where he'd left his jacket. His pulse beat rapidly through his body while tried to calm his breathing, glancing in concern at the man in his arms.

Troye seemed to be sleeping peacefully, undisturbed by the noise and Tyler's sudden jolt. Tyler briefly noted how they'd shifted sometime during their sleep so that Troye's back was pressed against Tyler's chest with Tyler's arm slung over his waist, holding him tightly.

Carefully lifting his arm away from Troye's body, Tyler inched backwards and crept slowly out from the warm covers, shivering slightly when he stood up and moved quickly and as silently as he could out toward the other room. He rubbed at his bleary eyes when the signal stopped just as he reached his jacket, and fished it out of his pocket with a huff, noticing the clock showing the time as just after three in the morning.

The display flashed with several unopened texts and missed calls, and Tyler quickly scrolled through the messages from an increasingly desperate Becca. They ranged from 'Wtf Tyler?! Call me immediately!', through 'Do NOT ignore me!', to the last one, reading 'Tyler? Please call me, I'm getting worried.'

Steeling himself against the harangue he knew was coming, Tyler clicked the latest missed call.

Becca answered before the first dial tone ended. "Tyler?!" her somewhat shrill voice shouted through the speaker. "Where the hell are you? Why haven't you called me back? I've been worried sick!"

"I'm alright, you don't have to worry-" Tyler began, only to get cut off when Becca replied, just as shrilly as before.

"Oh, really? And just what the fuck am I supposed to do other than worry that you're lying in a gutter somewhere when you're not answering your phone after I get a call from an angry as fuck client, telling me that one of my best guys just walked out from their appointment, spouting some bullshit about 'not being able to do this'?!"

"You really shouldn't swear so much, Becca, it's really unbecoming..." Tyler knew he was pushing all the wrong buttons, but he really didn't want to answer her questions either. The frustrated shout that rang out from the other end of the line only confirmed his success at riling Becca up further than necessary. He was just resigning to another earful when a sudden silence made Tyler pause, wondering if Becca was still there.

He didn't have to wonder long, though, when she continued a few moments later, her voice much lower and her words carefully measured. "Are you with him?"

Tyler closed his eyes and lifted his free hand to his face, rubbing it over his eyes and up into his hair. It was almost funny how Becca managed to sound like a jilted lover. But Tyler wasn't laughing.

"Becca..." he tried, not really knowing where he intended to go with his plea.

"This is a fine, narrow line you're walking, Tyler," Becca continued levelly. "You know that. Don't do this to yourself."

A sudden anger flared inside Tyler's chest, and he heard the petulance in his own words when he whispered harshly. "Yeah? Well, I hate to break it to you, but you're not my mother so you don't get to tell me what to do!"

"So what if I'm not?!" Becca's voice was back to shouting again. "I still care about you more than your folks ever did!”

The line went suddenly, deafeningly silent and Tyler snapped his mouth closed to hard that his teeth clicked together painfully. His hand tightened into a fist is his hair as his anger heated past the point of boiling.

"Oh God," Becca whispered, and Tyler barely heard it over the rush of blood in his veins as he tried to control his breathing. "Oh, _shit_ , Tyler. I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. You know I didn't-"

"I'll call you tomorrow," Tyler said in a clipped tone, cutting as much of his temper as he could from his words, before he lowered the phone and ended the call. He knew Becca hadn't meant it the way it sounded, but that didn't lessen the pain of hearing her say it.

This night was turning out to be just the perfect ending to a week of absolute hell and Tyler was suddenly so tired that he almost wobbled on his feet. The dark quiet of the empty living room seemed to be closing in on him and the allure of the man he'd left sleeping in bed beckoned him to return to his side.

Quickly turning off his phone and throwing it back onto the couch in front of him, Tyler turned and padded quietly through the little hallway leading to Troye's bedroom. All residual fury drained from his body in a rush at seeing Troye still rolled onto his side, breathing slowly and evenly, still deeply asleep.

Tyler sneaked across the carpeted floor and carefully slid back in under the covers with measured movements, trying not to jolt the mattress too much. As hard as Tyler had tried not to wake him, the minute he wrapped his arm back around Troye's waist, he noticed a deeper intake of breath, signaling Troye's slow rising from sleep.

"Tyler?" Troye murmured sluggishly. "Who was that on the phone?"

Tyler pressed a gentle kiss to Troye's neck as he pulled him back against his chest. "No one," he whispered against his skin and closed his eyes as he rested his forehead against Troye's soft hair. "Go back to sleep."

But Troye's body shifted restlessly in Tyler's arms and he turned slightly towards him to whisper over his shoulder. "You're not leaving, are you?"

The badly hidden uncertainty in Troye's voice made Tyler lift his head to peer at the side of his face, seeing that Troye's eyes were still closed.

"No."

Tyler felt Troye's hand lift to rest over his own where it held Troye's chest and his heart quickened.

"Please don't go," Troye continued as if he hadn't heard him. 

"I'm not going anywhere," Tyler whispered again while studying Troye's profile. He was most likely still lingering in that peculiar stage between being asleep and awake and Tyler settled back down to press another kiss against Troye's warm skin.

His breath caught in his throat, however, when Troye whimpered almost inaudibly and lifted his hand over his shoulder to gently grip at the back of Tyler's head, pulling him closer.

" _Please_..."

Tyler's breath left him in a rush when his chest squeezed as if he'd been dropped from a great height. He let Troye pull his head closer and opened his lips slightly to kiss Troye's skin more firmly. Tyler still made sure to keep his touch soft, because suddenly it was all too much and the slowly undulating man in his arms was too precious to ever treat with anything else than utter care and reverence.

A gasp rose from Troye's parted lips as Tyler carefully kissed every inch of skin he could reach, giving it little gentle licks here and there on his way from his neck and onto his shoulder. Troye pushed his hips back against Tyler's in response to his teasing touches and they both moaned quietly when Tyler's slowly growing arousal pressed against Troye through thin layers of fabric.

Troye drew his hand back and used it to push the covers down and off their bodies as the heat rose steadily between them. Then he reached back to settle his palm over Tyler's hipbone, pulling gently as he pressed back with rolling motions of his own hips, his breath leaving him in careful gasps through his open mouth.

Their movements where slow and steady, almost lazy as they inched apart and pressed back together again, and Tyler let his hand trail down over Troye's chest to his stomach. He caressed him with gentle fingertips before he paused at the waistband of his briefs, silently letting his actions speak for him.

Troye nodded and Tyler hooked his thumb under the elastic, pulling the garment down over Troye's hips and past his thighs to his knees before he couldn't reach further without leaving the delicious expanse of skin beneath his lips. He left Troye to kick his underwear off the rest of the way and pulled at his own, dragging them down and off his legs quickly.

After they were gone, he planted a lingering kiss on Troye's shoulder before rolling onto his back and stretching to open the drawer on the bed table, quickly gathering what they needed and turning back around to place the condom on the bed just behind him. Opening the bottle still in his hands, Tyler measured out some of the slippery substance onto his fingers and closed it, letting it fall to the sheets behind his back.

He reached for Troye and pulled him closer again, letting the weight of his length settle against him and rolled his hips. A clearer moan escaped Troye this time and he turned his head into the touch when Tyler nuzzled the shell of his ear.

Cupping his fingers to keep the lube from slipping from them, Tyler listened to the slight hitch in Troye's breath when he trailed his thumb from Troye's waist, over his hipbone, slowly curving forward to follow the line just above his thigh down toward his centre, carefully brushing over his tightened sack on the way.

When the backs of his fingers brushed against the divide between Troye's legs, he opened his mouth so suckle gently on the skin just under Troye's earlobe. Troye mewled as he lifted his leg, bending it at the knee and folding it back over Tyler's thighs. His back rested heavily against Tyler's chest in the new position, his hips turned more towards him as Tyler reached down and back further to let his fingers ghost over Troye's entrance.

His pulse sped up when Troye settled his hand over Tyler's forearm where it rested over Troye's hip and lower stomach, stroking his skin as if in approval. Gripping the other side of Troye's waist with his unoccupied hand, Tyler continued to place open-mouthed kisses over his neck while he pressed two of his fingers inside Troye at once.

Troye gasped and moaned as Tyler slowly began preparing him, gently pumping his fingers and curling them up toward his front to press against the spot that he knew would make stars burst behind Troye's closed eyelids.

Tyler heard Troye's breath hitch as he shuddered slightly at the touch, and he smiled into Troye's skin and did it again. Troye moaned and lifted his hand up once more to twist into Tyler's hair, and his entire body was so supple, so completely relaxed that Tyler saw no reason to prolong the path toward what they both clearly needed and took the opportunity to press in a third finger.

"Tyler," Troye gasped, angling down onto Tyler's digits and Tyler's heart skipped a beat.

"Shh," he whispered against the juncture of Troye's neck and shoulder. "I know, baby. I've got you."

Gently sliding his fingers free, he reached back for the condom wrapper, swiftly going through the motions and rolling it onto his straining length, his blood rushing with yearning for the moment when he was finally inside Troye again. Where he belonged.

Tyler placed his hand on Troye's hip and rolled them forward onto their side again, sliding his leg in between Troye's and lifting his knee to help hold it up while he reached down to settle against Troye's entrance. "I've got you," he whispered again and pressed forward, feeling Troye's heat slowly allow him inside and envelope him tightly.

Troye's body shuddered again as a long exhaling breath left him and his finger's twined a bit harder into Tyler's hair while Tyler sank further and further in. Tyler pecked at his skin repeatedly, peppering Troye's neck and shoulder in short, light kisses that he hoped conveyed how grateful he was to have him in his arms once more.

Slowly, his hips came to a stop once they were pressed tightly against Troye, and Tyler paused there for a minute to breathe against Troye's skin, not only to let Troye adjust to his intrusion, but also to just enjoy the moment, perfect in its intimate stillness.

Troye grew impatient after a while and wiggled his hips to show that he was ready for Tyler to start moving. Tyler smiled secretly, feeling joy burst inside him at Troye's eagerness. He slid his hand down to settle in the dip where Troye's thigh became his hip while easing back just a little, before using it to pull Troye gently back against himself as he moved forward again.

A whimper left Troye's open lips and Tyler repeated the slow movement, closing his own lips over the vertebrae at the top of Troye's spine and sucking carefully, letting his tongue dance over the soft skin under his mouth. Troye's hips snapped back against him, but Tyler refused to speed up, to leave the flutter in his heart behind and make this just about reaching their climax.

Instead, he rolled his hips again, as slowly as before and let his other arm slip underneath Troye's body to fold it up over his chest. He pulled Troye's back tighter against his front and moved his mouth up over his skin. He followed the line of Troye's hair to the back of his ear, catching his earlobe between his lips to nibble carefully at the soft flesh.

Troye let out a gasping moan and Tyler responded with a quiet hum, wholeheartedly agreeing with whatever it was that Troye was trying to convey with the stream of beautiful noises that left his mouth. He assumed it was something good when Troye's free hand reached up over his front to lace his fingers with Tyler's over his chest as the hand in Tyler's hair fell to cover the one on his lower belly. Holding each other, they started to move together in a gentle rhythm.

Tilting his head up to kiss at Troye's jawline, Tyler opened his eyes to look down at him. To his surprise, he saw that Troye also had his eyes open and focused on something in front of him. Following his line of sight, Tyler turned his head and found himself meeting Troye's gaze in the mirrored wardrobe doors lining the side of the room.

Tyler's breath caught, but didn't still his movements as he lowered his head to resume his gentle kisses over Troye's jaw and neck, steadily holding his gaze in the mirror.

They stayed locked like that, and even though Troye's eyelids fluttered with every gasp and gentle moan that left his lips, his eyes never fell fully shut to block out Tyler's stare. Their need was building steadily and, ever so slowly, Tyler began increasing the speed of his movements, adjusting his angle slightly in search for Troye's spot.

He knew he'd found it when Troye's hand squeezed his and he tightened deliciously around him, a stuttered moan falling from his lips through his heavy breath.

"So beautiful," Tyler whispered as he watched Troye's eyes flutter shut in the reflection and lifted his hand to wrap it gently around his weeping length.

Troye gasped again and lifted his hips into Tyler's touch, before seeming to change his mind and quickly pressing back against him again. Tyler pressed a smiling kiss to his jaw and settled back to rest his head against the pillow underneath him, finally taking pity on Troye by beginning a steady stroke of his hand.

Tyler moaned in tandem with Troye when he tightened around him once more and it wasn't long before Tyler's own movements became a bit more ragged, but never rushed, as Troye continued to move back into his thrusts a bit harder.

Feeling his pulse speed up in his veins, Tyler leaned in and closed his mouth over Troye's neck, letting his breath rush from his nose out over Troye's skin. He focused entirely on Troye, easily reading the signals of his body like a familiar, often revisited book, and he knew he was just as close as Tyler himself.

With a swipe of his thumb across the head of Troye's length, one last deep plunge inside his body, and the whisper of teeth against his neck, Tyler pushed Troye over the edge and watched him fall apart in his arms.

Troye moaned loudly, and the sight of his body shaking with release, along with his tightly clenching muscles, was all Tyler needed to reach his own climax. He moaned weakly and pressed his arm against Troye's stomach to hold him tightly against himself as his hips jolted forward with twitching movements while he rode out his orgasm. His breath stuttered in his throat and he felt his heart swell inside his chest when Troye once more reached back to wind his fingers into Tyler's hair.

It took him a while to realize that his tight grip on Troye's body could be uncomfortable, and slowly, Tyler relaxed his muscles one by one until his hold wasn't so bruising anymore.

But that did nothing to aid the slowly returning ache in his chest, although Tyler fought hard to keep his mind from running away with his heart again while he felt Troye's breathing slowly even out in his embrace. Tyler kept his eyes closed, waiting for his own heart to stop racing, and the silence of the room felt heavy with words he didn't dare give a voice, even if he knew it was useless to try to deny them.

So as he leaned in close to press his lips to the back of Troye's neck once again, he didn't deny them. Yet he didn't say them either, nor did he murmur or whisper them.

But he mouthed them.

He allowed his lips to form the syllables he feared, and he mouthed them silently against Troye's flushed, warm skin.

_I love you_

-


	13. I'm Latching Onto You

-

Troye’s eyes snapped open. He was still trying to catch his breath, lying on his side and facing the mirrors. He caught his own eyes in the reflection, yet stared unseeingly at himself as his slightly sluggish mind whirled with confusion.

A kiss was being pressed against the back of his neck, followed by a rush of warm breaths from the man who was still pressed close to his back. But what had caught Troye’s attention wasn’t the kiss. It was the light brush of Tyler’s lips moving against his skin just a second before that.

Tyler had said something.

Or rather, he’d _mimed_ something, curving his lips around words that settled soundlessly in the space between them. The tiny, gentle puffs of air that had left Tyler’s mouth as his lips moved had felt strangely familiar; they tickled Troye’s skin as well as the edges of his mind, like trying to remember a name that somehow suddenly escapes your memory and having it so close to reaching your consciousness that you can almost hear yourself say it. If Troye had been more focused, more alert… He could have sworn...

He was momentarily distracted from his thoughts when Tyler’s hand tightened a bit on his hip, and Troye was held in place as Tyler slowly moved back to slip from his body. Troye couldn’t stop the small sated sigh that escaped him at the gently pulsing warmth that accompanied the slight soreness left in the wake of Tyler’s presence. But when Tyler rolled further away, his movements gently shaking the mattress underneath them as Troye spied him removing and tying off the condom, Troye’s thoughts focused and zeroed in on the sensory memory of Tyler’s unspoken words once again.

He had to ask.

Drawing a careful breath, his question timed with the moment that Tyler began rolling back onto his side toward him. “What was that?” he asked softly, almost afraid to break the somehow fragile silence between them.

Tyler halted almost imperceptibly with his arm perched to wrap around Troye’s waist once more, but the break in his movements was so fleeting that it would have been easily missed if Troye hadn’t been paying close attention to their reflection in the mirrors across the room.

“Well _that_ …” Tyler murmured, intoning the last word before pausing to settle against Troye’s back as he held him, “was kinda great, if you ask me,” he finished with a sigh as he snuggled closer.

There was something… off about Tyler’s tone of voice, not to mention his casual choice of words, as if he was putting effort into sounding carefree, and it unsettled Troye even further.

“No,” Troye objected, before rushing to add, “I mean, yes. That too…” He paused, unsure of why he was suddenly hesitant to go on. “But, what I meant was… You said something.” He felt Tyler’s body grow slightly tense and Troye turned his head to speak over his shoulder. “What was it?”

Timid silence followed his question, and even if it was just for a few short moments, Troye’s mind whirled while he waited for Tyler’s answer. There were several options and possibilities for what Tyler might have said spinning in Troye’s mind, but he didn’t dare settle on any of them; especially not the one that flashed by the fastest of them all, yet still managed to make his heart speed up and his face fill with heat.

No. That simply wasn’t an option.

“I didn’t say anything.”

Tyler’s words were measured and his voice had deepened to a slightly darker register, making his statement sound like he didn’t want any argument on the honesty of it. A twinge of uncertainty filled Troye’s chest, making him feel almost guilty for asking.

For hoping?

“Oh.” Troye said simply and he murmured his next words as he turned his head back around to face the side of the bed. “Never mind, then. I’m probably just tired.”

Tyler hummed and hugged him tighter while burying his nose in Troye’s hair, not offering anything more in reply after he’d settled.

But Tyler _had_ said something. Troye was suddenly sure of it. He didn’t know how, but he just knew that Tyler was lying, even without looking at him. It was there in the quality of Tyler’s voice. The only question was why Tyler would lie about it.

The warmth of Tyler’s body pressed against Troye’s did nothing to stave the chilling feeling of rejection that overcame him, as if he was being deliberately held at arms length. He suddenly realized that he’d never before been so physically close to somebody yet felt so distant from them all at the same time. And he’d never before been this confused.

But he knew that Tyler wasn’t as relaxed as he was putting on. His mind was racing as well; Troye could feel it. With his back pressed to Tyler’s chest, he felt it in the way other man’s heart was beating just as fast and hard as his own. And he heard it in the carefully regulated pace of Tyler’s breath.

They stayed like that for long, quiet minutes, Tyler holding Troye close and breathing across his skin, both wide awake yet reluctant to acknowledge it. While Troye tried to sort through his thoughts, he never noticed when the world around him gradually faded away and he was brought into a restless sleep.

-x-

The sound of the toilet flushing and water running in his bathroom faucet was what pulled Troye awake the next morning. He had no idea what time it was, but the sunlight filtering in through his blinds told him that he’d somehow managed to fall asleep earlier that morning despite his racing mind.

He was still turned on his side, facing away from the open door to his bedroom, listening to the splashing noises that reached him from the hallway just beyond. Wondering how long Tyler had been up, he rolled over onto his back to place his hand palm down on the sheets beside him. They were still warm from where Tyler’s body had been resting probably only a matter of minutes before and Troye wasn’t really sure how to feel about knowing that Tyler had left the bed without waking him up first.

The faucet turned off in the bathroom before Tyler eventually appeared in the doorway, clearing his throat gently, and Troye turned his head to look at him. Tyler was only wearing his pants and his hair was sticking up in a few places, and he peered at Troye from across the room with eyes that were a bit puffy from sleep.

“Is it okay if I put on some coffee?” Tyler’s voice was raspy and one of his hands lifted to idly scratching a patch of skin just above his hipbone.

Troye felt a little skip in his heart beat at the image Tyler made, and even if all he wanted to do was cuddle the slightly ruffled man standing by the threshold, he nodded his head and watched Tyler give a short nod in return before turning and disappearing out into the hallway.

Listening to the distant noises of Tyler preparing the coffee machine, Troye turned his head back to stare up at the ceiling, ignoring the burning of his flushing cheeks and thinking back to the night before.

Troye had been fit to burst with happiness and cautious hope when Tyler had called him. It had been a week since he’d seen him and the opportunity to finally show Tyler that he maybe wasn’t as adverse to his advances anymore had made Troye fidget with excitement while he waited for the knock on his door.

But the demure man that had stepped inside Troye’s apartment had, despite accepting Troye’s initiative of a hug, flinched away from touches that were even remotely sexual. The unexpected dispirited nature of Tyler’s persona had effectively thrown Troye off balance, and when Tyler had told him about the man he’d met when he was younger, he’d fought hard to hold back tears of sympathy. Troye had realized then that he’d thus far imagined Tyler as someone who was strong in all aspects, someone who shrugged in the face of adversity and let it roll off of him like droplets of oil on teflon. He couldn’t have been more wrong.

Troye was grateful that Tyler had given him some insight to his past and how he got to where he was now. Tyler had hinted at it the first night they met, but it made Troye feel special to know that Tyler was willing to tell him more about how his life wasn’t as perfectly in line with his own wishes and desires as he’d always let on. That what he was doing perhaps wasn’t all completely by choice.

Seeing that vulnerability in Tyler had made Troye suddenly protective and he’d wrapped him close, folding him into his arms in an attempt to reassure him that everything would be okay. Despite knowing intellectually that he wasn’t able to promise any such thing, Troye had just followed his instincts and done what felt right then and there. And Tyler hadn’t seemed to object, so they had fallen asleep together like that.

When Troye had woken up to the murmurs of someone talking in his living room, his pulse had sped up, immediately thinking that Tyler was about to leave to go to a client last minute. He hadn’t even known what time it was, but the regularity in which Tyler was unexpectedly called into work was what made the suspicion make sense to Troye’s sleep addled mind at the time.

Just on the edge of being awake, Troye had quickly fallen back into a dreamlike state while waiting for Tyler to finish his phone call. Troye was stuck in that place where you’re aware that you’re just on the edge of consciousness but dreams and visions still play out in your mind.

In one of those dreams, Tyler had come back to bed only to whisper that he had to go and that he’d call Troye later. And in the dream, Troye had been suddenly filled with overwhelming sorrow and regret, and felt tears burn in his eyes because he’d been somehow convinced that if Tyler left then, he’d never come back again. He’d tried so hard to reach out for Tyler, to say something that would make him stay – with him.

But as you so often do in these kinds of dreams, or nightmares, he’d been unable to move or even make a sound as he’d heard Tyler get dressed and walk out of the room from behind him where he lay unmoving yet screaming inside.

When Tyler had eventually really crept back under the covers, Troye had been lifted from his agonizing vision. The lingering anguish that clogged up his throat had made it hard to breathe; had made him frantic for Tyler to stay, to hold him close and never leave the sanctity of his bed again.

He’d been desperate for bruising touches, to be reclaimed, and had wanted Tyler to erase the crippling vestiges of his dream with the undeniable reality of his warm and steady hands.

But Tyler had denied him the jarring touch that he needed, refused to take him hard and punishing, and instead kept his caresses and kisses so light that Troye had shivered and reeled from them. Unable to fully understand what was happening, Troye could only hold on while Tyler had made him feel consumed by mingling wonder and fear in a way that he’d never felt before. He’d opened his eyes to watch their reflection in the wardrobe doors and been immediately mesmerized by the image they made.

His gaze had settled on Tyler from where he could see him leaning up and grazing his lips over every patch of skin he could reach over Troye’s shoulder. When Tyler had finally met his gaze in the mirror, neither of them had been able to look away and Troye’s chest had swelled and ached under the intensity of it all, making him gasp for breath. And when Tyler had whisperingly called him beautiful, it was different from the other times he’d said it before. This time it was as if Troye’s heart heard the call and responded across the distance, filling with warmth and thudding hard, and he’d been forced to close his eyes to hold back sudden unexpected tears of emotion.

The answering flutter in his chest at the memory, followed by the sound of Tyler returning to the bathroom, shook Troye out of his memories. The answers to his confused thoughts clearly weren’t to be found in the small cobweb that fluttered in the corner of his ceiling, so he stretched slowly and yawned before rolling out of the warm sheets. Grabbing his sweatpants from where he’d hung them on the stool by the window, he stepped into them and gingerly moved towards the bathroom.

Now dressed in his shirt as well, Tyler was standing in front of the sink, facing the mirror and trying to tame his hair. Tyler didn’t look away from his task to acknowledge him and Troye was suddenly hesitant as to what to say. He couldn’t put his finger on it but there was something odd about Tyler, just like before they had fallen asleep. Troye leaned sideways on the doorframe while watching Tyler run his hands under the open tap and lifting his wet fingers into his hair, running them through the blond strands.

“I got a spare toothbrush last week. It’s in the cabinet if you wanna use it,” Troye offered softly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other before stilling. Troye had never been one to fidget and he wasn’t going to start now, no matter how strange Tyler was being. Troye’s internal reprimand made him nearly miss the way Tyler had also gone still, his hands paused on his head.

“Thanks,” Tyler offered after a moment, brushing his hands through his hair one last time before leaning forward and rinsing his hands under the faucet. For some reason, he still wouldn’t look at Troye.

“I figured since you, you know… stay over from time to time…” Troye shrugged, letting his words trail off, assuming that Tyler probably knew what he meant without having to say that he had bought the toothbrush specifically for Tyler to have at his place. Now that he had practically said as much anyway by hinting at it, it actually sounded kind of stupid and a bit presumptuous, and he immediately regretted saying anything.

Tyler shut the water off and quickly dried his hands on the towel that hung by the sink. When he finally turned around, there was a strangely morose quality to his eyes as he fixed Troye with a short, but steady gaze. Troye held his breath.

“You really didn’t have to do that,” he said before lowering his head as well as his eyes and walking forward to brush past Troye in the doorframe. He continued out into the living room and as Troye turned his head to watch his retreating back, he spied a slight shake to Tyler’s head while a hand went up to rub his forehead.

A twinge of cold disappointment filled Troye at the sight and he quickly turned back to stare at the tiled bathroom floor. “It’s just a toothbrush,” he whispered into the empty room and unconsciously shifted his weight again.

“We’ll have to swing by mine so I can change,” Tyler called out from the living room. Right. Lunch with Tyler’s friend. Troye had almost forgotten. “You get ready, I have to make a call and make sure I still have a job.”

That last bit made Troye turn more fully to look at Tyler, scrunching his eyebrows together gently and tilting his head. He crossed his arms over his chest and walked out of the hallway to stand just on the edge of the living room, watching Tyler pull out his phone and beginning to scroll through it quickly.

“What happened last night, anyway?” Troye asked curiously, and Tyler stopped on his route to the kitchen and lifted his head to look back at him from across the room.

“Um… I just messed up a little with a client,” Tyler replied, shrugging in a way that was clearly meant to look casual. Troye didn’t buy it. Tyler had been way too distraught the night before for it to have been anywhere near casual.

“What happened?” Troye repeated, taking a step further into the room.

“Why do you wanna know?” Tyler’s voice suddenly shifted to become a bit defensive. He stared back at Troye with a small frown of his own, his hand still holding his phone, thumb perched over the display.

“Because you’re avoiding the question,” Troye answered truthfully. Something had jolted Tyler during his meeting with that client, and Troye wanted to know why he was suddenly so adamant to keep the reason to himself when he’d been so open with him just a matter of hours ago.

Tyler seemed to be silently contemplating what to say and Troye waited patiently during the seconds it took before Tyler opened his mouth again. “I walked out on the deal before we could finish. There.”

Tyler’s voice was low and held a hint of exasperation. Although it made Troye want to start squirming since he’d rarely heard Tyler sound like that before, he was glad he’d stood his ground because now he had one more piece of the puzzle that was Tyler’s suddenly standoffish behavior. He decided to press for more while he was at it.

“Sounds like that new guy you told me about; the one that quit.”

Tyler stiffened a bit but hummed noncommittally after a moment and lowered his gaze to his phone once more to look at something on the screen, or at least pretending to.

“So?” Tyler replied shortly. “What are you saying?”

Troye drew a deep, steadying breath; Tyler’s current mood and Troye’s earlier mentions of the subject made him aware that he was about to tread thin ice. But he wanted – no, needed – to ask anyway, if only to plant the seed of thought in Tyler’s mind.

“Have you considered doing something else? More recently, I mean.”

Tyler’s eyes darted back up to Troye, widening just a smidgeon; in genuine curiosity or something closer to fear, Troye couldn’t tell. “Why would I do that?”

Tyler’s rapid counter question made Troye suddenly unsure and he shrugged, quickly losing his conviction and shifting his gaze down to look at his feet. “I don’t know… Maybe you’ve started to move past all that?”

Practically feeling Tyler’s gaze burn through him, Troye kept his head down while the silence that followed his timid words stretched on, and he waited for Tyler’s reply with bated breath.

“Troye, I…” Tyler began and then gave an almost inaudible sigh. “I have to make this call. Go get ready,” Tyler said in lieu of an answer, his words suddenly soft, before he disappeared into the kitchen, ignoring Troye’s last question.

Still looking at his now fidgeting feet, Troye nodded slowly, knowing that Tyler couldn’t see it but doing it anyway. Even if he’d gotten more information out of Tyler as to why he was acting the way he was, Troye was still as confused as ever and now felt a bit rejected as well. To add to it, he also felt something close to embarrassment for letting himself hope for something to change by how… tender Tyler had been the night before.

Tyler obviously hadn’t meant it, and going by the way he was acting now, he clearly wanted Troye to understand that it had been a mistake. 

Turning on his heel, Troye made his way into the bathroom for a quick shower, wanting to escape the sudden pain in his chest, even if he knew it was futile.

-x-

The supposedly short drive to Tyler’s friend’s place was made longer by the stop at Tyler’s apartment. The mood in the car was awkward and silent, and Troye offered to stay behind while Tyler ran up to change into something a little more casual yet still proper.

He’d instructed Troye that, while his friend – Tom – was a good man with both feet firmly on the ground, it wouldn’t do to show up for lunch at his house wearing a slightly worn, loose fitting jumper, no matter how casual he insisted that his guests should be. So Troye had gone for a thinly knit black cardigan that he’d bought once when he’d felt like splashing out on some nicer clothes.

Tyler had then gone on to explain that when Tom would undoubtedly ask them to ‘feel at home’, that didn’t mean you should slouch in your seat and put your feet up. Out loud, Troye had answered with a sigh and insisted that he did actually have manners, but in his mind he’d been intrigued by the image that Tyler was painting. Who was this Tom, anyway? The Queen?

As they left Tyler’s neighborhood and drove off once more, Troye fiddled with his seat belt, pulling on it and adjusting it over his chest and hips, but couldn’t seem to get comfortable in his seat. He couldn’t stop thinking about the call that Tyler had made while he’d been in the shower earlier and was practically dying to know how it went. Was Tyler still an escort or not?

Going by what Tyler had said, it seemed like the severity of his actions the night before meant that he could very well be fired. But he hadn’t given any clues to how the call had gone afterwards. After a couple of minutes of Troye’s continuous fussing, Tyler drew a deep breath and glanced over at him.

“There’s no need to be nervous,” Tyler said as he turned left in an intersection. Troye stilled self-consciously, having not even noticed his fidgeting and cursing himself again for doing it as he let the seat belt pull taught over his shoulder once more when he lowered his hand.

“I’m not nervous,” he answered quietly, fixing his eyes on the traffic in front of them.

“Then what’s with the squirming?” Tyler asked, his words patient.

Troye resisted the urge to tug at the belt and folded his hands in his lap to keep them from reaching up unbidden. He wondered if he would get away with just asking outright about the result of Tyler’s phone call. It was kind of significant, after all.

“What did your agency say when you called them?” he braved his question, realizing only after that if Tyler had thought he was worried about meeting Tom, then the change in conversation topic might seem a bit sudden. He saw Tyler looking over at him from the corner of his eye, but kept his gaze firmly pointed forward.

“Well,” Tyler began slowly. “They aren’t happy with me but I got away with a warning, since I bring in good money, I guess.”

Troye nodded in understanding, suppressing the voice in his head that was screaming at him to beg Tyler not to go back and to stay with him instead. A lump formed unbidden in his throat and he swallowed.

“That’s good,” he replied evenly, turning his head to look out the window by his side, idly watching the people moving on the sidewalk but not really focusing on the eclectic crowds of L.A.

“Yeah…” Tyler commented from the driver’s seat before silence settled in the car once more.

Once they passed a pair of large gates and turned up a slight incline inside a gated community with large, whitewashed villas perched on what looked like huge lots of finely kept gardens, Troye forgot about the silence and realized that he might not have been that far off with the whole royalty bit when imagining this Tom person. Their surroundings distracted him from the tense atmosphere that had settled in the car, enough so that he leaned forward slightly in his seat to stare in wonder at the houses, or mansions, rolling past.

They had just reached the top of a long street when Tyler turned the car onto a long, sandstone paved driveway and soon they were approaching a huge villa, with an arched two story front entry leading to the front door. The house spread out on each side in a curved manner, seeming to follow the rounded end of the drive way. Tyler pulled the car to a stop just next to the edge of the garden, where a large pair of sculpted bushes enveloped the corner of the building. There were two other cars parked a bit closer to the entrance; a glistening red convertible and a sleek silver Porsche with a spoiler on the back hood, and sudden images of old Bond-films flashed across Troye’s mind. He smiled as he stepped out of Tyler’s car, turning on the spot to look up at the impressive house before them.

When he lowered his head to look at Tyler over the roof of his red car, he found Tyler already studying him curiously. Troye’s smile eased a little but he didn’t let it fall completely as he tilted his head in silent question. Tyler shook his head in equally silent response and gestured for Troye to follow as he turned and began walking toward the large, pillared entry.

As they stepped onto the stone structure, one of the double glass and wrought iron doors slid open to reveal a tall man wearing what looked like a suited uniform. He was smiling gently at them and nodded as Tyler led them through the doors. Following just a step behind, Troye smiled back at the man that he assumed was a butler or similar, since a property of this size surely prompted a need for staff if one could afford them.

“Welcome, sirs,” the man said in a low, pleasant voice and Troye was just about to thank him when a louder voice rang out from the grand hallway beyond.

“Tyler! It’s so good to see you again.” A slightly older man with curly, dark blond hair, twinkling eyes, and a soft cashmere pull-over stepped closer to meet them with a smile just as Troye stepped in far enough to let the butler close the door behind him. “Welcome back to my humble abode,” the man smiled and placed one of his hands on Tyler’s arm.

There was an air of modesty about him that Troye could already sense and he was immediately at ease in the man’s company. Of course, Tyler had already told him that Tom was a good man, and if he was good enough to be someone Tyler considered a friend, then maybe Troye shouldn’t have worried at all. It was just that money and people who had lots of it could be a bit intimidating sometimes.

“Thank you for having us. It’s great to see you too,” Tyler answered and smiled back at their host. Tom’s light brown eyes shifted from Tyler and settled on Troye just as Tyler gestured to his side. “Tom, this is Troye.”

Tom’s smile mellowed and grew gentle, and Troye smiled back timidly under the steady scrutiny.

“Hi,” Troye said quietly, not sure if he was supposed to reach out and shake Tom’s hand, so he opted for staying still while he was being quite obviously studied.

“Adorable,” Tom whispered as if to himself before giving Tyler a pointed look, and Troye felt a rush of heat fill his cheeks. Tom focused back on Troye and extended his hand for a shake while his smile grew bigger again. “Welcome, Troye. I’m so glad to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” Troye replied politely and shook Tom’s warm hand, glancing quickly at Tyler to find him looking at him with a small, unreadable smile – the first one Troye had received all morning. It made him feel oddly out of place, since he’d begun to think that Tyler was ignoring him, even if he was talking to him… sort of. At least he’d held back on all of the usual fondness he showed for Troye whenever they were around each other, which to Troye was a sign that he was being more or less avoided.

Troye was pulled from his thoughts when Tom, who’d kept his eyes firmly on Troye for a moment longer, stepped back to gesture toward the long hallway behind him.

“Please, come on in and make yourselves at home! Lunch will be served shortly, and I hope you don’t mind, I invited a couple of friends from the country club’s latest tournament.” Tom’s smile never subsided as he went on. “My chef has planned a lovely menu. I hope you like Coq au vin,” he added but didn’t really wait for a response before turning to lead them down the corridor with a bit of a flourish.

Troye turned to raise an eyebrow at Tyler in question, whispering “Cock-o-what?” under his breath, wondering if he’d been told the name of a fancy dish or if Tom had just asked him if he liked dick.

Tyler snorted quietly before whispering back, “Don’t ask,” then smiling fondly and beginning to walk down the same path as their host had gone.

Troye, however, lingered a bit in the foyer. He supposed it wasn’t that strange, since they were obviously friends and all, but Tyler seemed much more relaxed now in Tom’s company than he’d been ever since waking up. And even if he was glad that Tyler seemed to be lightening up a little, Troye couldn’t help but feel a bit unsettled that it wasn’t he who’d caused the change.

After hurrying to follow Tyler and their host around a right hand corner, Troye was soon stepping in through a large doorway and into a brightly sunlit room with a white and light blue décor. A white wooden table, large enough to seat at least twenty, stood as the centerpiece of the room. It was perched on a delicately patterned rug with light blue edges and surrounded by matching white dining room chairs. Although the room, as the other parts of the house he’d spied on their way there, was lined with art and different knick knacks, the furnishings were tastefully sparse and minimalistic.

On the far end of the long table, by the tall backyard facing windows, two men were sitting next to each other and talking animatedly between themselves. From where they were seated facing the door, Troye noted that they seemed to be around Tom’s age as he still kept himself one step behind Tyler, and they laughed cheerfully at something one of them had said. Troye found the easy banter quite reassuring, like he’d done with Tom, and watched with a small smile as the two seated men looked up when Troye and the others approached the table.

“Hugo, Dean; this is Tyler and Troye,” Tom said with enthusiasm as he walked over to stand by the head of the table, introducing the two men with a nod of his head.

The men rose from their seats and leaned over the table to shake both of their hands among simultaneous greetings of “Fantastic,” and “Great to meet you both,” around large, genuine smiles. Troye smiled back and replied as best he could to their slightly jumbled words, allowing his arm to be firmly shook up and down.

“So this is the lovely couple you talked about earlier, Tom?” the man named Dean asked as Tom indicated for Troye to take the seat closest to him on the corner and gestured for Tyler to take the one next to that.

Troye lifted his head quickly to stare wide-eyed at Dean, who was already seated, and paused halfway onto his own chair. “The what?” he breathed quietly, his mind spinning a bit. Had Tyler been going around and telling people they were together?

“Tom -” Tyler began in a gently admonishing tone before Tom interrupted him.

“Now, I didn’t say they were a couple, Dean,” Tom gently corrected his friend and shifted to focus on Tyler with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “I said they were _practically_ a couple,” he finished with a wink before pulling out his own chair and stepping around it.

Troye fell onto his seat with a bit of a thump, not really listening to the quiet chuckles and ‘ooh’s that rose from the men across from him, and lowered his gaze to stare down at the table. He felt his face being overcome by a blush once more and was struggling to find something to say in response. He didn’t need one, however, when Tyler cleared his throat just as Tom slid into his own seat.

“And since when are you such an expert on these things, Tommy?” Tyler asked in an exaggeratedly sweet tone as he smiled at the older man.

“Ah, Tyler, you hurt me!” Tom gasped jokingly with a put-upon frown while placing his hand over his chest. Tyler snorted and Troye felt like he was watching a tennis match by how his head kept whipping back and forth between the two men sitting on either side of him.

“I’m simply letting you know that you should probably stop with the matchmaking before you go and hurt yourself,” Tyler drawled smoothly.

Dean and Hugo laughed quietly from across the table and Tom joined in after just a moment. “There’s no need for me to play matchmaker, my dear boy. From where I’m sitting, it looks like you’ve done a pretty good job of that on your own,” Tom finished gently and turned his smile on Troye once again.

Troye felt like he was being discussed much like live stock at a farmers market and he suddenly wanted to sink into the floor. If he’d known that the conversation was going to revolve around Tyler and him from the moment they stepped foot in Tom’s house, he might have reconsidered coming at all. Not that he wasn’t flattered, or maybe even a bit happy about the none too subtle nudges Tom was giving Tyler, but this was beginning to be a bit much at all once. His face was probably a very unflattering red going by the heat he felt emanating from his skin, and he lifted one of his hands unconsciously to rest his cool fingers on one of his cheeks.

“I think that’s enough, Tom,” Hugo spoke up with a light laugh as he smiled at Troye. “You’re gonna make the poor boy self-combust any second.”

Troye looked up at him and quickly let his hand drop back into his lap, sitting up a bit straighter. The man who’d opened the door for them earlier walked in with a pitcher of sparkling water along with an opened bottle of white wine, providing momentary distraction from the conversation as Tom busied himself with asking his guest what they would prefer to drink with their pre-course salads.

Troye barely kept himself from jumping in his seat when he felt a warm hand sneak into his lap to rest gently over his wrist. The older men were talking among themselves, and Troye whipped his head around to look at Tyler, finding him staring at him intently.

“You okay?” Tyler asked in a low, quiet voice.

Troye nodded quickly, the intense blue eyes that were mapping his still blushing face and Tyler’s need for checking up on him making his heart skip a beat. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he whispered back in a rush of breath, managing a half-smile of sorts.

The concern in Tyler’s expression flickered with soft relief before it shifted to something more guarded again, and Troye felt his heart sink once more when Tyler pulled his hand back after giving a short squeeze to Troye’s wrist.

Tyler was surprisingly silent after that, mostly staring down at his plate while they ate the salads that had been placed in front of them by a young woman that Troye presumed worked in the kitchen. Troye didn’t really know what to say to add to the conversation around the table when Tyler wasn’t guiding him, but was soon pulled into a lighthearted discussion on some recently premiered movies by the other three.

It turned out that Tom and Dean where close friends with a well-known director that had been involved in making many of Troye’s personal favorites. Troye eagerly asked questions about the man, encouraged by the light banter between Tom and his friends, and growing more and more at ease until he found himself laughing along to some very entertaining anecdotes about a few of the more prolific members of high-society Los Angeles.

When their empty plates where being cleared away, Tom fixed Troye with a smile and asked if he’d like to accompany him into the wine room to help select the red that was to be served with the main course.

Troye was a bit surprised at first, and glanced at Tyler. He didn’t know why though, since it wasn’t like he needed Tyler’s approval or anything. Tyler raised his eyebrows at him and nodded with a shrug, as if wondering the same thing. Troye struggled to suppress the rise of another blush, wishing that he would just stop suddenly acting so unsure of himself, and placed his napkin next to his glass of water before rising from his seat to follow Tom out of the room.

It wasn’t long before Tom was guiding him into a cool, temperature controlled room and found himself staring down rows upon rows of shelves lined with bottles. He gave an impressed whistle and turned to look at Tom wide eyes. Tom laughed delightedly.

“Don’t look so surprised, Troye. Any self-respecting vintner knows to have a well stocked collection,” he chuckled as he began walking down the right hand side of the room, scanning the rows.

“Vintner?” Troye asked, following a step behind Tom and peering at the names printed on some of the bottles that rested on their sides on the stained wooden shelves.

“Oh, yes. I own a few vineyards scattered about the south region, primarily around San Diego and Orange County. Most of them are inheritances from my parents and I pride myself in carrying on the tradition.” Tom turned and smiled at Troye as he almost stumbled into him when he didn’t notice him stop. “If you drink locally grown red, then you’ve probably had a few bottles of my vintages without knowing.”

“Yeah, probably,” Troye agreed and watched as Tom pulled a bottle out of its slot to scan the label.

“I didn’t invite you back here to discuss wine, though,” Tom said casually as he pushed the bottle back into place and pulled out the one next to it.

Troye quickly lifted his head to look at him, suddenly anxious. “You didn’t?” he breathed, feeling his heart beat was speeding up and he shifted nervously as he waited for Tom to elaborate.

“You see, I’ve known Tyler for a long time now and I know how he is about certain things.” Tom looked up from underneath his lashes at Troye, and Troye stilled at the mention of Tyler’s name, swallowing rapidly. “Especially his work ethics, as it were,” Tom added before pulling the bottle free from the shelf and placing it gently on the solid oak table next to them, quickly reaching up to place a second bottle next to it.

“Oh?” Troye replied, not really knowing where Tom was going with this, but still eager to hear what he had to say.

“Indeed. What I’m getting at is that there’s little that jolts him, and now that I’ve met you, there’s no doubt in my mind that you’ve jolted him.”

Tom’s words were gentle yet lined with an air of gravity, and Troye’s pulse sped up even further as he drew a deep, slightly unsteady breath. “Can I ask how you’re so sure?” he said in something close to a whisper.

“Well, for one, I’ve never before seen him act like he’s been acting ever since the first time he mentioned you,” Tom insisted while keeping his gaze firmly trained on Troye. “Secondly, you should see the way he looks at you when he thinks no one will notice.”

Troye exhaled shakily and couldn’t help the sudden smile that pulled at his lips, so he lowered his head to try to hide it.

“When you laughed at one of Dean’s jokes just now, Tyler looked at you like you were one of the Seven Wonders of the World,” Tom continued with a chuckle. “And I’m sure that to him, you probably are.”

Lifting his eyes from the floor back to Tom, Troye found his smile reflected on the older man’s face and heard a small giggle leave his mouth before he could stop it.

“Really?” he asked, his voice full of cautious hope and not even caring how it sounded.

“Really,” Tom replied before his toothy grin softened. “I can see that he’s afraid though, and I’m sure you’ve seen it too,” he added, and Troye realized that maybe he had. “Please be careful. I care deeply for Tyler and I don’t want to see either of you hurt.”

Troye’s mood mellowed and he shifted his gaze to one of the bottles that Tom had placed on the table and was now idly turning back and forth on the wooden surface.

“You’ve gotten under his skin, young man,” Tom continued as his smile became happier once more. “Somehow, you’ve managed to change something fundamental in him and it’s clear that he cares very much about you… Look, I know I’m stepping out of bounds of what’s my business here, and that I might not be someone who’s had a lot of experience with life partners and that sort of thing… But I do know love when I see it.”

A sudden rush of butterflies filled Troye’s belly and he gasped as he darted his gaze back to Tom’s smiling face.

“Love?” Troye whispered while staring at Tom with wide eyes. The word whirled inside his mind and made him lightheaded as he watched Tom nod gently. Memories of gentle touches from the night before flashed across Troye’s mind and he could feel his cheeks flushing again. Perhaps that was the answer to the change he’d felt. Perhaps Tom was right.

After all, Tyler and he hadn’t just had sex last night. What they had done was something else entirely, something that Troye had never experienced before. And that’s why he’d had such trouble pinpointing what it was. It had been completely different from every other time they’d been together; slower, gentler, almost cautious yet thorough. Something had shifted in Tyler’s way of touching him, his way of moving and breathing, and there was no other way that Troye could describe it now that he had been given that four letter word; Tyler had made love to him.

The thought made a thrill run through Troye’s body and he barely held back from shivering at the feeling. Was that the answer to why Tyler had been acting so strangely all day? Troye grabbed onto to edge of the table beside him and drew a deep breath.

“I hope I haven’t scared you too much. I just want what’s best for Tyler, and I have no doubt that you’re it.” Tom reached out to squeeze Troye’s arm. “Now come on, the others are bound to wonder where we’ve gone by now,” he added encouragingly when Troye looked back up at him.

Troye gave a small smile in return before turning to follow Tom out of the room, his mind still reeling. When they returned to the dining room, Troye’s eyes immediately sought out Tyler’s, and he almost stumbled when their gazes met as Tyler looked at him over his shoulder.

It could have been Troye’s imagination, or a result of his newly found hope, but there was indeed a different light in Tyler’s eyes when he looked back at him than there had been before. It was easily missed, since Tyler turned his gaze away almost as quickly as Troye could catch it. Yet, the way Troye’s heart filled with joy when he glimpsed it was enough to make the smile stretch his lips wider as he found his way back to his seat just when the girl from earlier appeared with the main course.

Conversation was kept light all throughout the remainder of the meal, and Tyler even joined in on more than one occasion, seeming to grow ever more relaxed in the company of his friend. Troye laughed more than he could remember doing in a long while, even among the people he usually hung out with, and he enjoyed himself immensely.

Perhaps it was the happiness that was threatening to spill over like the bubbles of an overfilled glass of fizzy drink from what Tom had said, perhaps it was just the easy company. But Troye found it didn’t matter which when he waved goodbye to Tom and the others with a smile as Tyler and he stepped outside an hour or so later, filled with great food and wine.

However, the drive back to Troye’s apartment found the atmosphere settle with timid silence once again. Troye sighed almost imperceptibly as he watched the outside world roll past his window, wishing that Tyler wouldn’t be so strange. He wanted the laughing, flirting, smiling Tyler back; the one that was filled with filthy suggestions and terrible puns. He wished Tyler wasn’t suddenly so distant. But then again, maybe he was being distant for a reason, and maybe that reason was that he didn’t want to keep seeing Troye.

When they slowed to a stop at the curb outside his house, Troye tried to gather all the courage he possessed while his stomach churned nervously. He couldn’t just leave this like it was, or he’d drive himself insane by turning it over in his head again and again. So, with his pulse beating so hard he could feel it in his throat, he unbuckled his seat belt and turned in his seat to face Tyler.

“Did you…” Troye began, but had to stop when his voice wavered. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Do you want us to stop seeing each other?”

Tyler whipped his head around so fast that Troye feared he might have hurt his neck. The panic in Tyler’s eyes was reflected in his voice. “What?! No!” he protested quickly and a bit too loud for the confined space of the car. “Why would you say that?” he added, his voice lowering a bit as his eyebrows drew tightly together above his blue eyes.

“I don’t know.” Troye shrugged and avoided Tyler’s intense stare. “I just feel like maybe I’m starting to get in the way and I just… I don’t know,” he finished weakly, picking at a seam in the upholstery of his backrest.

“Do _you_ want to stop seeing me?” Tyler’s voice was suddenly just barely above a whisper, and Troye quickly lifted his head and shook it sharply.

“No,” Troye replied simply and watched as Tyler unbuckled his own seat belt to be able to lean up and further toward him.

“I don’t want to stop seeing you either,” Tyler whispered and reached up to cup Troye’s cheek in his hand, his gaze growing softer. “I’m sorry if I’ve been weird today. I meant it last night when I said I had a lot on my mind right now, and I’m truly sorry if I lead you to think it was something you’ve done. It wasn’t… It isn’t.”

Troye breathed in deeply and shrugged one of his shoulders. If Tom had been even close to right with what he’d said earlier, Troye knew he had more to do with it than Tyler was admitting. But the pained look in Tyler’s eyes told him not to push it any further, so he nodded slowly.

Tyler’s thumb caressed Troye’s cheekbone as if in gratitude before he lowered his hand again and sighed softly. “I’ll be in touch later this week, Troye.”

“Okay,” Troye nodded again and gave a tentative smile as he began to reach for the door handle behind him.

“Okay,” Tyler repeated with a gentle smile of his own, settling back in his seat.

“Talk to you then,” Troye said before opening his door and stepping out on the sidewalk, cautiously reassured by the passion in Tyler’s earlier protest. He even braved a widening of his smile as he gave a little wave after Tyler’s car when he pulled out on the street again and drove away towards his own apartment.

However, on his way up the stairs of his building, Troye couldn’t shake the strange feeling that this moment was somehow the last he’d seen of the tentative situation he and Tyler had relied on so far. It was like the sense of a deep inhalation that would vibrate in the air, as if nature was holding its breath, moments before a deafening thundercrack.

The calm before the storm.

-


	14. I Dare You To Let Me Be Your One And Only

-

Tyler groaned deep in his chest when he felt Troye tighten around him where he was thrusting into the younger man with harsh jabs. He tilted his hips, aiming down into Troye's sweet spot with more accuracy, and heard the younger man moan long and loud into his anchoring pillow in response. Tyler's nerve endings were slowly starting to tingle with the familiar signs of impending orgasm, and he sped up his thrusts even further, his grip bruising on Troye's hips.

They were on Tyler's rumpled bed - or rather - Troye was on his knees on the bed, feet over the edge of the mattress and with his face pressed into one of Tyler's pillows, while Tyler was standing on the floor behind him, pounding him like there was no tomorrow. While biting his lip at the sweet sounds of pleasure that he wrung out of Troye's straining, arching body, Tyler resolutely ignored the whisper in his mind that said that there might very well not be a tomorrow. Not one with Troye in it, anyway.

Four days had gone by since the last time they saw each other. Tonight was just an ordinary Thursday night really, and Tyler had the day off. Yet it was anything but ordinary, since Tyler was trying his very hardest to not let his inner turmoil show on his exterior, like it had during the awkward morning and following lunch that past Sunday. That day had been rigid in the aftermath of Tyler's momentary lapse of judgment; when he'd revealed more of his feelings than he'd meant to and done exactly what he didn't want to - alert Troye that something was off. He knew it was his own fault.

But instead of trying to hide it by going on the defense like he'd done the day after, Tyler was now furiously trying to steer things back to the way they had been before, when steaming hot sex was all there was to this. Because the alternative was just too daunting to even consider.

Despite his best efforts, however, it seemed that everything really had changed that day. Since showing up at Tyler's doorstep after work like Tyler had called and asked him to, Troye had acted differently. Tyler had caught him looking at him with this strange expression of anticipation, as if he was waiting for Tyler to say or do something. It had left Tyler feeling restless and consequently taking it out on Troye's poor shirt, which had lost a couple of buttons on its way off the younger man's body.

And when Tyler wouldn't slow down like Troye tried to by guiding his grappling hands into calmer caresses, Troye's face was tinged with something close to sorrow, his eyes glittering and his lips set almost in a frown. That particular look made Tyler quickly resort to murmuring wickedly dirty propositions while nipping at Troye's earlobe.

Tyler was pretty sure why Troye was looking at him like that. And it broke him a little bit each time he had to ignore it because he couldn't make the looks go away, at least not in the way Troye probably wanted him to.

Regardless of what he was trying to convey, the unspoken questions and requests in Troye's eyes instantly brought Tyler back to that Saturday night. Tyler could hear every breathy sigh of pleasure and feel every thrill of emotion that had enveloped him from memory alone. But even while part of him was elated about the deeper connection he had felt to Troye then, the rational part of Tyler's mind was warning him to keep his distance, to not show what that his treacherous heart really wanted. That was why he'd outright lied when Troye had asked him about having said something. It all came down to his own survival; if he allowed even one chink in his carefully constructed armor, the weight of his emotions would surely swallow him whole.

So Tyler acted like he didn't notice anything amiss when Troye, while responsive as ever to the harsher treatment, seemed to be on the verge of breaking the charged reticence between them. Tyler knew that he was playing dumb and that it was far from the right thing to do, but life wasn't always fair and 'the right thing to do' wasn't always the _smart_ or the _best_ thing to do, for everyone involved.

A high-pitched whine rose from the man writhing on the bed in front of him. Tyler blinked away droplets of sweat from his eyes as Troye reached back to grab one of his hands from where it gripped his hip. Tyler allowed his hand to be guided around to Troye's front, letting him wrap their fingers together around his length, linking them and beginning to stroke in tandem. Troye was pressing his forehead into the pillow to breathe into the space underneath his lifted body and he cried out at the added stimulation of their hands on his straining hardness.

Tyler's erection twitched at the sound, the tingles building into surges of pleasure, and he put all of his efforts into keeping his movements steady when Troye's body began to convulse from his rapidly contracting muscles. Grunting loudly at the way Troye practically rippled around him while he came, Tyler slammed home one last time, letting the rush of climax soar through his limbs. Riding out his orgasm, he stayed lodged inside Troye while their hips twitched with irregular spasms of aftershock, both moaning breathlessly every now and then with their involuntary movements.

The surge slowly ebbed away into stillness. After eventually regaining some of his breath, Tyler drew his hand back from Troye's softening flesh, feeling Troye give his fingers one last squeeze before letting him go. He ignored the little thrill in his chest at the gesture and pulled out gently.

Watching as Troye fell forward onto the sheets with a sigh, Tyler backed away from the bed and turned around. He made a quick trip to the bathroom and returned to find Troye still resting on his belly the way he had left him; one leg slightly bent, face relaxed where he rested his head on its side on the pillow, and his back rising and falling with deliberately steadying breaths.

Tyler crawled over Troye's limp frame and nudged his shoulder on his way to the unoccupied side of the bed, pulling down the covers and flopping onto his back. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Troye lifted up on his hands with a small grunt and crawled up and under the covers to lie on his side beside him, throwing his arm over Tyler's middle and linking their legs.

The silence grew too much for Tyler after just a few moments and he searched for something to say that wouldn't invite for deeper conversations than what he was ready for. They were fine the way they were and Tyler resolutely refused to listen to any of the reasons why they weren't that a small but persistent voice was irritatingly repeating in his head. Nonchalantly blowing a strand of sweaty hair from his forehead, Tyler cleared his throat.

"Wow," he breathed and forced a chuckle that tasted false as it passed his lips and probably sounded like it too. It wasn't like the sex between them wasn't good - amazing even - it was just that Tyler felt like he was now constantly lying by omission and it made the ache in his chest that much more painful.

"Yeah," Troye replied after a beat, his breath brushing across Tyler's chest.

Strained silence settled again and Tyler struggled to find something more to add. He was deep enough in his own thoughts to be a bit startled when Troye suddenly leaned up on his elbow to look down at him with those expressive eyes once again.

"My birthday's coming up," Troye said around a cautious smile.

Tyler shifted to link his fingers together underneath his head and turned slightly to study Troye. "Really?" Tyler gave a small smile of his own and Troye nodded in reply, his fingers idly drawing patterns on Tyler's chest.

"Mhm. Caspar's been going on about a bar crawl, but I'm not sure I wanna spend my birthday in a haze of alcoholic fumes," Troye explained and gave a little shrug.

"What date is it?" Tyler asked, already beginning to contemplate if he should get Troye something.

"The fifth... Monday," Troye answered and drew a breath as if he was going to continue, but paused as his gaze shifted down to his own hand where it stilled on Tyler's skin.

"Actually," Troye began again while his smile grew unsure, "I wanted to ask if you had any plans this weekend." He lifted his eyes back to meet Tyler's. "Maybe we could have dinner or something?"

Feeling his own smile falter while his heart beat sped up, Tyler tensed, knowing that Troye noticed by the way his eyes flickered down to his shoulders. "This weekend?" he asked and when Troye nodded in reply, he continued, "I have bookings."

"Oh." Troye's voice was a soft whisper and Tyler felt a knot grow in his stomach when the hand that had been resting on his chest drew away to fall to the covers in between them. The response spoke volumes more than what was being said out loud and Tyler could feel the tension building into something palpable, almost like a physical touch.

"What?" Tyler whispered back, dreading the answer but knowing that he had to ask. Troye wouldn't let him get away with avoiding it any longer.

"I was just hoping, since it's my birthday and all, that maybe you could make an exception this time." Troye murmured gently, keeping his eyes steadily locked with Tyler's. Despite the insecurity in his voice, his gaze was unwaveringly challenging.

"They won't let me cancel this late," Tyler answered around a sigh, and even though he wasn't lying this time, the words didn't feel any easier to say than if he had been. "Remember I'm still under that warning?" He paused. "Besides, I've got to make a living."

Only a moment after he finished speaking it dawned on Tyler that what he was doing sounded eerily close to defending his choices - _again_ \- and it made him suddenly irritated that he apparently felt somehow obligated to justify why he did what he did. Especially to Troye, who already knew more about him than most. 

Tyler frowned as the annoyance grew inside him and, as he looked away, he almost didn't hear the whisper that came from the man that was propped up on his elbow by his side.

"But does it have to be doing this?"

The question made Tyler's temper suddenly flare like hot flames inside him, scorching the edges of his reason and common sense. Tyler hated feeling like he was being crowded and was unable to curb the instinctual reaction to lash out when he did. He shifted his arms down to prop himself up on his elbows and turned his frown on Troye.

"Don't tell me you still have issues with what I do," Tyler said, noticing his voice growing deeper yet somehow louder, each word wrapped in frustration. The shift in expression from timid to confused anger was instant on Troye's face, and Tyler's pulse rushed at the sight, filling him with adrenaline.

"'Still'?" Troye repeated in a voice that had risen to match Tyler's as he sat up, the duvet falling into his lap. "What do mean 'still'?" His frown deepened. "Tyler, we've been messing around for months now. I wouldn't have done that if I wasn't willing to look past the fact that I have to share you with other men practically every day! And yet you have the nerve to get jealous when you think someone's flirting with me?!"

"That's different!" Tyler argued back. Troye's words were making a lump form in his throat, but he resolutely ignored the bad feeling that was beginning to crowd his conscience in favor of holding his ground.

"Oh, yeah?" Troye questioned. "How so?"

Tyler huffed and looked away, realizing that he'd backed himself into a corner by not thinking through his protest. He realized that he acted and sounded like a petulant child when he replied after a short pause. "You know how."

"Actually, I'm feeling particularly stupid today," Troye said, his voice sardonic and bitter, and Tyler realized he'd never heard him sound like that before. "So why don't you humor me and actually say this out loud for once."

Lifting his eyes back to Troye's, Tyler felt almost lightheaded from what Troye was implying. He wanted to keep Troye from saying it, to not force this on him, but he knew it was already too late when Troye continued, "Tell me why it's different with me, Tyler."

And there it was.

There was the opportunity for Tyler to give voice to the feelings that he'd carried for longer than he'd first realized. The door was being nudged open and all he had to do was step on through. In every way possible - with his eyes, his body, his tone of voice, his words - Troye was pleading with Tyler to say how much he actually cared. There was no longer any doubt in Tyler's mind that Troye knew it anyway.

But he had to look out for himself. Everyone he'd ever cared for had always left him and Tyler knew that he wouldn't be able to survive this if Troye was to realize he wasn't actually worth it. Every ounce of Tyler's being was begging him to stop this before it was too late; to push Troye away before he got a chance to hurt him.

Tyler's heart was racing, thumping hard against the inside of his ribcage. Swallowing harshly around the panic that he felt rise like bile in his throat, Tyler was helpless to stop the words that forced their way to his mouth and past his lips, as if they were lava erupting from a volcano, burning his throat along the way.

And that's how it came to be that Tyler said the singular, most idiotic thing he had ever said in his life.

"You get it for free!"

Stunned silence followed.

Tyler heard his own words as if played back to him, momentarily unable to comprehend that they had been spoken in his own voice. He felt his eyes widen as he held Troye's gaze, watching his face shift to reflect the same shock.

And then, gradually diminishing like melting snow under a sweltering sun, Troye's expression slowly shut down. Sudden movement shook Tyler out of his daze and he blinked at seeing Troye out from beneath the covers and standing by the bed in a flash. "Fuck," he whispered as he watched Troye quickly bend to snatch his underwear and pants from the floor.

"Troye," he tried again, louder this time as his panic was instantly redirected to keeping things from falling apart around him. "Troye, don't-"

Having pulled his underwear into place, Troye whirled around to face the bed where Tyler was now shuffling quickly towards the edge. Troye's eyes flashed with a mixture of anguish and fury, and Tyler stilled under his attention, his chest throbbing in dull pain with the knowledge that he'd made Troye to look at him like that.

"Fuck. You."

Troye's words where short and deliberate. He kept his glare trained on Tyler for a fraction of a second more before turning away again to harshly step into his pants.

"I didn't mean it." Tyler gathered one of the sheets around him. He had just stood up from the bed and started to move forward when Troye's voice halted him in his tracks.

"You stay where you are," Troye snapped, not even glancing in Tyler's direction as he picked up his shirt and pulled in over his head.

"Please." Tyler was growing desperate, his mind racing a mile a minute to find something to say that could mend at least a portion of the damage he'd made. But Troye wasn't responding, he wasn't even acknowledging Tyler's presence. It all seemed like a nightmare was playing out around him and Tyler wanted nothing more than for someone to wake him up.

Troye was now completely dressed and moving out from the bedroom. Tyler rushed forward, quickly picking up his boxers and putting them on before following Troye out into the hallway. Troye had stopped just inside the door to step into his shoes and Tyler hurried closer.

"Don't go," he pleaded, hearing how desperate he sounded and hoping that Troye at least look at him. His wish was granted when Troye finally turned to face him while reaching out to clutch the doorknob just behind him.

"I have to," Troye said, now unexpectedly calm and his blue eyes filled with more remorse than anything else.

"No, you really don't," Tyler argued. "Please, just listen to me. I don't know why I said that."

"But I know exactly why," Troye continued as calmly as before. "I've tried so hard to accept this on your conditions, Tyler, I really have. I can't do it anymore, and since you won't choose, I'm making the choice for you. Just... I have to leave."

"I can't let you do that!" Tyler reached out to grab Troye's arm, only to have Troye harshly shrug him away as soon as they made contact.

"I said, don't touch me," Troye practically growled as he pressed himself back against the door, his eyes flashing darkly again.

Tyler drew his hand back and felt his eyes start to burn, the long forgotten prickling sensation of rising tears startling him and making him blink rapidly to keep them at bay. "Please..." he whispered, not trusting his voice to hold if he spoke any louder.

"Who are you?" Troye went on, drawing his eyebrows together and looking at Tyler in confusion while shaking his head. "You were never this distant, this... _cold_ before. This is not the Tyler I've gotten to know over the last few months. This is not the Tyler I -" He stopped and lowered his gaze to the floor, lifting his hand to run it through his hair.

Tyler shifted nervously while waiting for Troye to continue, fighting hard to keep from stepping closer and reaching for him again. Troye seemed to have gathered his thoughts when he lifted his eyes back to Tyler once more.

"We might have started this as a purely physical thing and I can't deny that I enjoyed it. I did, very much! I've been as active in this as you!" Troye paused and lowered his voice.

"But let me tell you something that I've figured out very recently; we've been fooling ourselves, Tyler. _I've_ been fooling myself. Because no matter what we both thought, this..." he gestured between them, "whatever the fuck this is, stopped being just about sex the _second_ you decided to give that check back to Caspar. And if you can't admit that, then I don't know what I'm doing here. It seems like I'm the only one who thought..." Troye drew a deep, shuddering breath after his words trailed off, seeming to take a moment to study Tyler's face.

"Troye." Tyler almost whimpered his name in anguish, wishing that he could take it all back, that he was strong enough to give Troye what he was asking for.

"You know what?" Troye sounded defeated as he straightened his back and focused back on Tyler with eyes that were suddenly shiny. "It doesn't even matter anymore, but I guess I've been an idiot to think that I meant something more to you than any of your clients. But I was never really one of them." And with that, Troye turned the doorknob and walked out of Tyler's apartment.

"Troye!" Tyler called out, rushing forward and wincing when the door slammed shut in his face. He lifted his clenched fist and punched the door, shouting both at the pain that shot out from his knuckles and the equally blinding pain in his chest.

"Fuck!" he yelled, his ribcage heaving with panting breaths. He let his head fall forward to lean against the cool, painted wood and closed his eyes.

Tyler stood there for a long time - his mind spinning, his heart breaking, and never even noticing the tears when they began rolling down his cheeks.

-x-

Tyler pressed the fluffy terrycloth into his eyes for a moment and sighed into his fabric covered hands. Sniffing loudly, he finished wiping his face on the towel with a rough swipe and hung it back on its hook by the sink.

Tyler didn't need to look at his reflection to know that his eyes were puffy and red-rimmed, going by how sore they felt, so he didn't even bother a glance before clicking off the lights and leaving the bathroom.

It was the morning after what had ended up being a horrible night. When he'd finally collected himself enough to leave the hallway, Tyler had fallen into a heap on his couch and reached for his phone to try to get a hold of Troye. He'd been sent straight to voicemail, where a generic recording instructed him to leave a message. Hearing the mechanical voice of a computer instead of Troye's gently lilting accent had added yet another heavy stone to the pit of Tyler's stomach.

"Troye..." Tyler had said after the tone, murmuring gently. "I need to talk to you. Will you hear me out? Just, please call me back."

After that, Tyler had tried again and again until his phone ran out of battery. Then he'd moved into his bedroom. Ignoring the rumpled bed to the best of his ability while picking up his charger, he'd sat on the floor beside it, leaning back against the nightstand. When the cord was plugged in, Tyler resumed his calls. And he'd continued, well into the night, before eventually giving up when Troye still hadn't answered and the need to sleep became too much. Tyler had crawled up into his bed and buried his face in sheets that still smelled faintly like the man he needed more than he'd realized.

As he shuffled out into a living room now bathed in bright morning sunlight, aiming for the couch again, one particular thought was prominent among the jumbled mess in his tired mind; Troye had never been a client. Tyler knew it was true the moment Troye had said it. Stupid as it might seem, he hadn't thought of it that way before. Even though Tyler had treated Troye like other clients at the beginning of their very first night together, it had been more or less revoked when he didn't accept the fee afterwards.

What Tyler had wanted to tell Troye when he tried to reach him over the phone was that he'd become used to keeping any guy he had sex with at a distance. It was a habit and he hadn't considered the fact that Troye never really fit in that category at all. What he had failed to see all along was that he'd fallen in love with someone who cared about him too and that there'd never been anything standing in his way of letting it happen – no exchange of money or services, no guilt, nothing... Except for his own cowardice.

Tyler sat down heavily on the couch and leaned forward to bury his face in his hands with a deep sigh. And now he'd screwed it all up. In trying to guard his heart, Tyler had succeeded in pushing Troye away... which was exactly what he'd wanted before his eyes had been practically wrenched opened by what Troye said when he left.

Feeling fresh tears well in his eyes, Tyler breathed in through his nose and sat up straight, shaking his head. There was no use in crying about it any more. What he had to focus on now was to try and fix it, to make Troye reconsider before it was too late. Because, now that he'd had a chance to let it sink in after the disaster he'd caused, Tyler realized that nothing was more important than Troye being his. In every way. Not even his fear of rejection. He was instantly filled with conviction that Troye was worth the leap of faith he would have to take.

Tyler already knew what he had to do; he'd been thinking about it all night while futilely trying to get a hold of Troye. So he drew a deep breath and picked up his phone once again. It was high time anyway. Tyler wasn't getting any younger and he couldn't keep running away from life. And Troye was the only man he'd met since starting with escorting that made the prospect of settling down more appealing than the alternative.

Quickly clicking the number on the display before he could change his mind, Tyler tried to convince the anxious part of himself that everything was going to be alright. He just needed to make sure to keep his head above the surface and breathe through it.

"Hey, Tyler!" the familiar female chirp greeted him. "I was just about to send you the details for tonight. It looks like you're in for a treat! You'll never guess where this guy's asking you to meet him," Becca whispered conspiratorially.

"Becca," Tyler interrupted, the sobriety in his voice a stark contrast to her enthusiasm. "We have to talk."

"What's going on?" Her eagerness was instantly replaced with worry and Tyler felt guilt well up inside him for the amount of extra work he was about to place on someone he considered a friend.

"Some... stuff happened yesterday and it forced me to do some serious thinking," Tyler explained, deciding that the easiest way to carry through was to jump right into it.

"What happened?" Becca whispered through the receiver.

"That doesn't really matter. What's important is the decision I've made," Tyler went on, not wanting to elaborate on the details of his fight with Troye and lose momentum when he was so close to getting to the point. "And I'm truly sorry that I'm leaving you to clean up my mess."

"Tyler, you're scaring me."

Tyler drew a shuddering breath, trying to calm his racing pulse. "I'm scared too, but I need to do this. For me," he whispered back and closed his eyes. "See, I won't be taking that appointment, Becca, or any other for that matter... Because I quit."

Tyler breathed out shakily, feeling his heartbeat in his throat, and couldn't help but feel like he was waiting for his words to set off some sort of cataclysmic event. But the world didn't stop spinning, time didn't stop moving, and the heavens didn't come crashing down on top of him. What _did_ happen, however, was that he suddenly felt light as a feather; as if the only thing anchoring him to solid ground was his hand clutching the edge of the sofa cushion he was sitting on. And it was an amazing feeling.

"You've fallen hard for this boy, haven't you?" Becca's softly spoken question brought Tyler back to the conversation at hand. He knew she was too smart not to have him figured out.

Tyler's heart fluttered when an image of Troye's laughing face flashed before his mind's eye and he smiled despite himself, glad that Becca was choosing not to question his decision. "I really have," he said around a small laugh, thinking to himself that it felt strange to hear himself confirm it out loud. It was a good strange, though.

"And he cares about you too?" Becca asked, the concern clear in her question.

Hesitating for a moment, Tyler thought back to the night before. Surely Troye's words and reactions wouldn't have been that strong if he didn't feel anything? "He hasn't said that as much, and if he doesn't, then so be it." Tyler gave a small sigh. "But I hope he's at least a little bit interested," he finished and felt his cheeks flush with color just at the thought.

"Then I wish you all the best, Tyler. I truly do. He obviously means a lot to you and all I want is for you to be happy, whatever you choose to do. Just know that I'm expecting regular updates," she said in gentle warning. "Don't vanish on me."

"Thank you, Becca. You know I love you, right?" Tyler smiled as he finally felt his shoulders relax a bit.

"I know, doll. You too," she replied, her smile audible before she giggled. "Now, make me proud and go sweep him off his feet."

Tyler barked out a laugh, the action making the last bit of tension drain from his body as his chest warmed from within. "He'll never know what hit him," he chuckled and lowered the phone, ending the call.

He didn't hesitate long, however, before searching through his contacts and finding the name of the next person he needed to talk to. Still smiling, Tyler lifted the phone back to his ear.

"Hi, Korey! It's Tyler," he said when the call connected. "Listen, I've got a favor to ask. You know that job opening you told me about last time I came to the bar? Is it still available?"

-x-

Stepping out of his car with a bounce in his step, Tyler took a deep, refreshing breath of the still night air. It wasn't that late, only 9 pm, and despite the warmth of summer lingering over the city, Tyler's jittery nerves made him shiver slightly when thinking about what he was about to do.

He leaned back in through the open door and reached over the center console to grab the silk paper wrapped bouquet of flowers from the passenger seat. Once he stood up again and closed the car door, Tyler felt his smile widen into a nervous grin as his eyes lifted to the building in front of him. God, he hoped Troye wouldn't refuse to see him.

Tyler had tried to reach him numerous times over the course of the day, but still to no avail. When Korey had gotten back to him about the vacancy at the bar just a few hours after Tyler's call, Tyler had been so happy he was sure he was going to burst. He had been hired without even having to give an interview.

There almost seemed to be a higher power at work with how well things had panned out and the only thing remaining to be done was to tell Troye the news. Tyler hoped with all of his heart that the steps he'd taken were what would change Troye's mind; that this was what he'd meant when he'd indicated his displeasure with Tyler's former job.

'Former job.' Tyler almost giggled as he repeated the words in his head. Indeed. That part of his life was behind him now and it was time to move forward, hopefully with Troye by his side.

Barely keeping himself from breaking into a jog as he approached the entrance door, Tyler ran lightly shaking hand through his hair. He was almost positive that Troye would be home - he'd called Caspar earlier to make sure. The South African hadn't been all that willing to talk to him at first, which Tyler could understand, seeing that Troye had probably informed him of what had happened the night before. But after a little bit of wheedling, Tyler had eventually managed to get enough information out of Caspar to learn that Troye would be home later that night, even if he had no clue when. Caspar told him that Troye had left work early, not willing to share where he was going but just saying that he needed some space to think.

Caspar hadn't let their short conversation end without giving Tyler a little piece of his mind first. He'd said that although he didn't know details about what had happened, he was sure that Tyler had done something bad and that Tyler had better be planning to set it right by calling and looking for Troye. Tyler had done his best to reassure Caspar that that was his exact plan before thanking him profusely for his help.

Tyler's grin was still in place as he entered the building and quickly scaled the stairwell, excited and ready to open up his heart and his life to the man he loved. He was just reaching the last flight of stairs when murmurs of conversation trickled down from the floor above.

Slowing his step to try and avoid startling whoever was talking, Tyler finally reached the hallway where Troye's apartment was the third door on the left, checking over the flowers in his hand to make sure they still looked good before lifting his head.

And there he froze, barely having time to register what he was seeing before his heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, like a crystal glass breaking on impact with a hard surface.

Because standing further down the hallway was Troye, with his back against the wall just beside his door, his brow set in a frown of concentration above tightly closed eyes, a muffled groan rising from his chest. And he wasn't alone.

Troye's hands were lifted to clutch the shoulders of the dark haired man who was holding Troye's tie, the one that Tyler had given him, in a tight grip to keep them pressed together.

The bouquet fell unnoticed from Tyler's suddenly limp grip and the silk paper rustled softly as it hit the floor, but Tyler barely heard it over the ringing in his ears.

The man was David.

And Troye was kissing him.

-


	15. And It Hurts With Every Heartbeat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (this chapter takes us back to the events of the last one, but from Troye's POV.)

-

Troye stilled, feeling as if he’d been slapped across the face. He had been, in a way, if not physically then at least by the cruelty of Tyler’s statement.

All air seemed to have left the room in a whoosh, abandoning them to a hollow vacuum where no sound was permitted, as if swallowed up by nothingness.

Tyler’s voice echoed in his head. ‘You get it for free.’

Out of all the things he could have said, Tyler chose to string those words together into a sentence and fling them out in the open as if they were the most obvious answer he could have given. Troye didn’t know if Tyler had intended it to be funny or something that could be said in jest. But the close to haughty tone of his voice negated that theory, and all Troye was left with was the simple truth that Tyler was saying it to be hurtful enough to push him away.

And it did hurt. So much so that Troye thought his heart had stopped beating. A numbing resignation was taking over his limbs and Troye realized he would never be able to make Tyler see things the way he did.

He might as well admit defeat and move on while he still could. While he would still be able to heal his heart and save at least a bit of his dignity. Letting his gaze zero in on Tyler’s slowly widening eyes, the image of Tyler’s own realization of the impact of his words made air rush into Troye’s lungs once again and he felt like a man that was surfacing after being close to drowning.

Just a moment later, Troye was up and out of the bed. He had to get dressed and leave before the pain got a chance to manifest as tears. He heard Tyler mutter something before saying his name but resolutely ignored it in favor of moving quickly.

“Troye, don’t -”

When Tyler called out to him again, Troye couldn’t control the sudden white hot anger that flared inside him. He felt his vision narrow into a point when he spun around to stare at Tyler, who stilled in his movements.

“Fuck. You.”

The response was instinctual and Troye’s skin tingled with something close to a rush of exhilaration at being able to bite back. The reaction felt warranted after what Tyler had just said to him, as well as all the confusing heartache he’d been put through before that. Yet it ripped him apart to hear himself say it, and after just a moment longer of watching Tyler’s face shatter into pained regret, Troye resumed pulling on his clothes, ignoring the tiny voice in his mind that begged him to take it back.

“I didn’t mean it,” Tyler tried, remorse clear in his voice, and Troye briefly deliberated putting him on the spot on why he’d said it then, before deciding against speaking any more than necessary.

Troye could see out of the corner of his eye how Tyler was beginning to stand up from the bed and Troye had to stop him before he could move closer. Because if he did, Troye was sure his resolve would crumble and he’d be falling apart right there on Tyler’s bedroom floor. He couldn’t allow that. 

“You stay where you are,” Troye snapped while pulling his t-shirt over his head and yanking in down his torso before bending down to grab his button down off the floor.

“Please,” Tyler begged as Troye turned to walk out of the bedroom, quickly heading towards the hallway to put on his shoes. He heard the shuffling of movement behind him and knew that Tyler had followed him.

It was confirmed just a few moments later when Tyler spoke again, standing just beside him. “Don’t go.”

Troye’s chest squeezed painfully at the desperation in Tyler’s voice, and when he turned back around after gripping the doorknob in his hand, it took everything in him not to give in to Tyler’s pleas.

“I have to,” he forced himself to say, summoning all the bravery he possessed to stand his ground. No one, not even Tyler, should be allowed to treat him like this, and he had to let it be known.

“No, you really don’t. Please, just listen to me,” Tyler’s voice was beginning to waver and Troye knew that Tyler was just as hurt as he was. “I don’t know why I said that.”

And just as soon as that last bit left Tyler’s mouth, Troye realized that he knew why. It was just as evident in Tyler’s eyes now as it had been that past Sunday. Troye just hadn’t understood it then.

Tyler was afraid. He was probably scared out of his mind now that things were suddenly out of his control and that he couldn’t dictate the direction they should take from here. It dawned on Troye that although he himself had been steadily nudging their relationship forward into something more, intentionally or not, Tyler had never actually meant for it to go this far. And Troye had gone along with most of Tyler’s initiatives because it was all so new and thrilling to him. But that just wouldn’t work anymore. Not for him.

“But I know exactly why,” Troye answered with all the composure he could muster. “I’ve tried so hard to accept this on your conditions, Tyler, I really have. I can’t do it anymore, and since you won’t choose, I’m making the choice for you. Just… I have to leave.”

“I can’t let you do that!” Tyler stepped closer and reached out for him and Troye panicked again, taking refuge in his earlier anger while he shied away from Tyler’s hand.

“I said, don’t touch me,” he growled through his clenched teeth and moved as far back as he could before the door prevented him from moving further. The blue eyes that stared back at Troye were tinged with sorrow and suddenly shining as if overcome by a rush of tears. It must have been a trick of the light, however, because as Tyler blinked a few times in rapid succession, the sheen was gone.

“Please…” Tyler whispered, almost seeming to be unable to speak any louder.

The difference between the man that was standing before him now and the one that had lashed out at him earlier was so utterly confusing to Troye that he was close to sobbing just from frustration. This Tyler reminded him of the man he’d come to know before everything changed – before Tyler seemed to have become unaccountably angry just days ago. With Troye, with himself, or with the world in general, Troye didn’t know yet.

“Who are you?” he questioned, not really seeking an answer since he suspected not even Tyler could answer that. “You were never this distant, this… _cold_ before. This is not the Tyler I’ve gotten to know over the last few months. This is not the Tyler I –”

Troye stopped talking, catching himself just in time before he said something he would immediately regret. It wouldn’t help him if Tyler were to know. Instead, he took a moment to gather his wits as well as his breath, trying to calm his heart which felt like it was about to beat right out of his chest. Troye knew what needed to be said and he had to say it now before the chance was forever lost.

“We might have started this as a purely physical thing and I can’t deny that I enjoyed it. I did, very much! I’ve been as active in this as you!” Troye admitted, staring back at Tyler and hoping that the other man would listen to reason for once, because a sudden insight had reached him just the other day when once again thinking back to how this had all started.

“But let me tell you something that I’ve figured out very recently; we’ve been fooling ourselves, Tyler. _I’ve_ been fooling myself. Because no matter what we both thought, this…” Troye pointed between them, searching for a word that would describe them and once again coming up empty. “Whatever the fuck this is, stopped being just about sex the _second_ you decided to give that check back to Caspar. And if you can’t admit that, then I don’t know what I’m doing here. It seems like I’m the only one who thought…”

He let his words trail off, finishing the sentence in his mind: ‘It seems like I’m the only one who thought that meant that you wanted us to be something more.’

“Troye,” Tyler’s weak whisper made a lump form in Troye’s throat, restricting his ability to breathe, and he could feel his impending breakdown building up speed inside him. He had to get out of there.

“You know what? It doesn’t even matter anymore, but I guess I’ve been an idiot to think that I meant something more to you than any of your clients. But I was never really one of them,” he finished, hearing how broken he sounded, and opened the door. He gave Tyler one last look and stepped out through the doorway, not being able to stop himself from slamming it shut behind him.

Troye quickened his pace, some of his step towards the main door of the apartment building becoming more of a run that a walk. He had to get as far away as possible before he broke down. Tears were welling up in his eyes and his vision was becoming increasingly blurry; so much so that he could just about make out the contours of the door. The dusky outside world, the escape that he craved, was visible on the other side of the window that was set in it.

A whimpering sob was ripped from his lips before he could stop it and Troye crossed the last remaining distance of the hallway at a run, covering his mouth with a hand to prevent any more noise from escaping.

Pressing his shoulder against it, Troye wrenched the door open with his bodyweight and stumbled outside. The first tears began to fall from his eyes as he turned to hurry down the sidewalk, still covering his mouth lest he start bawling right there. But it didn’t matter that the tears where now escaping; Troye could barely see where he was going through the blurring of his eyes in the gradual darkening of night.

When he reached the corner of the street, he slowed to a stop and turned to lean back against a lamp post. And there he finally allowed himself to cry. His chest was hurting. His head was hurting. His heart was hurting. Everything hurt and Troye struggled to catch his breath in between the sobs that wracked his body.

He so desperately wanted to share more with Tyler than just his body, and when Troye had asked if Tyler would like to celebrate his birthday with him, hope was still burning somewhere deep within him; hope that Tyler would let him in and let them grow into something more. But the flame had been violently put out when Tyler had opened his mouth next.

It wasn’t like Troye didn’t know he had at least partially put himself in this situation by pushing Tyler to tell him things he wasn’t ready to say. But that didn’t make it any less painful to be rejected. The true depth of Troye’s own feelings had become gradually clearer over the course of the last weeks. Then just that very Sunday night, when he’d had a chance to think about what Tom had told him over lunch, it had finally sunk in. He was well on his way of falling for Tyler, if not already there, and Troye could no longer stand the thought of him being with anyone else. It was beginning to break him apart.

And with Tyler suddenly being stubbornly withdrawn, who knew how long it would have taken him to say anything, assuming he ever would. This had already taken too much out of Troye for him to go on waiting, pacing back and forth just beyond the threshold of Tyler’s affections like a scolded dog anxiously waiting to be allowed back into its masters good graces.

Troye wiped angrily at his eyes and lifted his head, drawing a few shaky breaths. This was for the best for both of them. There was nothing gain from continuing something that would never lead anywhere, at least not in Troye’s opinion. He’d already vowed all those months ago that he wouldn’t waste time on meaningless hook-up’s. Even though Tyler had every potential to be something more, it was beginning to look all the more futile. They would probably both do better if they moved on.

Having gotten to Tyler’s place by cab, Troye decided that walking home would probably do him good. It wasn’t that far; it’d take him less than an hour if he dragged his feet, and the open air seemed much more appealing right then than confined space. It might help clear his head a bit, and as slow tears continued to fall, time to think seemed to be exactly what he needed.

-x-

After a night of restless tossing and turning, Troye woke up blurry eyed and feeling like he’d gone several rounds in a boxing ring. The pain of the events of the night before still made his body, and especially his head, throb with a dull pain. His muscles were tense, his eyes stung, and the light of morning did nothing to brighten his mood.

He went about his morning as if in a haze, his shower doing nothing to warm the chill that had seemed to set deep in his bones. He got dressed in a routine manner, not reflecting much more on the clothes he put on than what was strictly necessary to make sure he was decent enough for his job at the office. That is, until he reached his collection of neckties that hung haphazardly on a coat hanger in his wardrobe.

His hand paused over the multi-patterned array of options. None of the ties that hung in front of him looked appealing in any way. Troye knew almost without thinking about it that the one he wanted to wear this day, of all days, was stuffed behind the pillows on his sofa.

He strode out of the bedroom with determined steps and rummaged around among the pillows for just a moment until he found Tyler’s – well, his – tie, quickly looping it around his neck and tying it. Then walking into the bathroom to check it in the mirror, Troye didn’t really care if it went with the rest of his attire or not. That wasn’t the point. The point was that today would be the last day he ever brought it out from its hiding place. After he got home from work later, he might as well throw it away or stuff it on the bottom of the little bag he kept for charity giveaways.

When he’d finished dressing, Troye sat down on one of his kitchen stools, cup of bland coffee set on the small table in front of him, and stared down at the dark screen of his phone. He wasn’t sure what would greet him when he turned it back on. Maybe there’d be nothing – no missed calls, no texts, no sign of anything being out of the ordinary. That particular thought made his stomach knot up more tightly than the prospect of a phone full of messages.

Resolving to the fact that he would eventually need his phone, after all, Troye turned it on and soon found himself staring wide-eyed at more than 50 missed calls. They were all from one person – the one person he wanted to speak to both most and least of all. Among the missed calls was one single voicemail.

With the knot in his stomach growing heavier, Troye lifted the phone to his ear with trepidation.

“ _Troye… We need to talk. Will you_ –"

He lowered the phone and hung up quickly. Tyler’s disembodied voice whispering his name on the recording just made everything all the more real and Troye felt fresh tears well up in his eyes. Tyler had had every chance to talk. Why try to do it now after he’d already ruined everything?

Troye’s belly lurched unpleasantly and he wondered if he should call in sick. But he wasn’t actually sick and acting as if this was somehow breaking him to the point of not being able to function properly would be to give it more weight than it deserved.

 _Unfair_ – that’s what Tyler was. Unbelievably unfair and selfish and stupid and immature and-

Troye felt his grip tighten around the cup, and with a new determination, aided by lingering anger and indignation, Troye rose to pour the now tepid coffee in the sink and made his way to work.

Naturally, since that was Troye’s lot in life, it wasn’t long after stepping into the building that he was faced with a bright-eyed Caspar. The tall blond spotted Troye from further inside the lobby and held the door to one of the elevators open while waiting for him to catch up. Caspar smiled cheerily at Troye as he walked closer with a resigned sigh.

Caspar was more than likely looking forward to the upcoming weekend, still thinking they’d go out celebrating Troye’s birthday together. Troye wasn’t in the mood to do any such thing and less so now than he’d been before last night. In fact, the further things were from reminding him of his birthday, the better.

As he came up to the elevator and his waiting friend, Troye noticed Caspar’s smile fall into a frown of confusion. “Jesus, Troye. You look like shit,” Caspar said with the frown still in place, following Troye with his eyes as he passed him and walked inside the elevator.

“Gee, thanks a lot, Cas. Nice to see you too,” Troye replied blandly and turned around to lean back against the wall on the left. He knew his eyes were still a bit puffy from the crying he’d done and his skin was probably paler than usual.

“No, I mean it. What’s going on?” Caspar’s asked as he followed him inside and pressed the button for their floor. His voice was tinged with genuine concern this time and Troye lifted his eyes to glance at his friend before shrugging and looking down at his fidgeting hands.

“I wish I knew,” he whispered and pulled at his shirt sleeves.

There was a short pause in which Caspar seemed to consider what to ask next. Troye mostly just wanted to forget about everything that had happened and focus on his mundane work rather than the smarting pain that stung his chest every time he was reminded of Tyler.

“Are you okay?” Caspar eyed him searchingly from the other side of the elevator.

“Not really,” Troye shook his head and lifted his gaze to watch the numbers above the door increase with every floor level they passed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Caspar asked as the bell dinged, indicating the arrival at their floor.

Troye shrugged again, not sure if he’d start bawling or throw a fit if he was to start talking about it, so he silently prayed that Caspar wouldn’t force it.

“Does this have anything to do with Tyler?” Caspar asked as they walked out on the carpeted floor and began heading toward their office booths. 

Neither tears nor rage followed the question and Troye was suddenly more curious than anything else. Had Tyler tried to get in touch with Caspar when Troye hadn’t answered his phone?

“Why? Did he call you?” Troye asked, not sure if his question came out sounding eager or anxious as he turned his head to focus intently on Caspar for the first time that morning.

“No, he didn’t, but you just confirmed it’s something to do with him,” Caspar pointed out and lifted his eyebrows. Troye sighed and shook his head.

“Perhaps it’s better if you just leave it, Caspar.”

“What did he do?” Caspar urged gently while he stopped in the opening of Troye’s booth to watch as Troye sat down heavily in his swivel chair and stared up at Caspar from under his eyebrows.

“Nothing,” he muttered, silently continuing the sentence in his head, ‘and that’s the problem.’

“He didn’t hurt you, did he? ‘Cause I’ll whop his ass if he did.” Caspar straightened his back and puffed out his chest. Even though it was kind of sweet of him to go all protective over his friend - something that threatened to build a smile on Troye’s face - Troye sure wasn’t about to allow anything of the sort. Because he was sure that Caspar wouldn’t refrain from actually punching Tyler if he got the go-ahead. Perhaps he would anyway, at his own discretion, if Troye wasn’t careful with how he worded his reply.

“Stop it,” Troye said with conviction and glared at Caspar. And yes, Tyler _had_ hurt him, but not in the way Caspar seemed to think.

“But seriously, though,” Caspar continued and relaxed his stance a bit, lifting his arm to lean on the cubicle wall. “Do you want me to have a word with him?”

“No!” Troye shook his head vehemently, growing tired of the conversation when all he wanted to do was forget anything ever happened. “What I want you to do is to stop talking about it and never mention his name or anything to do with him ever again. It’s over, Caspar,” he continued in a softer tone. “It was never meant to be in the first place.”

Troye swiveled around on his chair, turning his back to Caspar and hearing a gasp rise from the man stood behind him. “Oh my…” Caspar whispered as dramatically as only he could.

“What now?” Troye sighed exasperatedly, tapping in his password on the desktop computer, knowing he’d regret asking but too tired of it all to have Caspar hovering over him for the rest of the day.

“I never thought I’d see the day,” Caspar said softly as if speaking to himself. “Alright, I’ll leave you alone for now, but there’s no way I’m gonna let you give up on him, Troye. Because you do know why you’re acting like this, right?”

Troye didn’t dignify Caspar’s unintentionally patronizing question with an answer and pretended to be busy replying to an urgent email when Caspar continued, “You’re in love.”

Troye’s fingers paused over the keyboard as he stared unseeingly at the screen, unable to tell if the way his heart stuttered was a good or a bad thing. When he regained his senses after just a short moment and continued tapping away at the keys without acknowledging Caspar’s words, his silence probably spoke more on his behalf than if he’d actually replied.

-x-

The cold water felt like sweet relief against his flushed skin as Troye brought another handful up to his face, pressing his fingertips into his closed eyes. He was leaning over one of the sinks that lined the wall in the bottom floor gents’ restroom, washing fresh tear tracks from his face and trying to stave the redness of his sore eyes.

Caspar and he had just gotten back from a long lunch at their favorite coffee shop when Troye suddenly felt all the blood rush from his head with a dizzying speed. He’d abruptly stopped walking and all the air left his lungs at once while he stared fixedly at the back of what he thought was a familiar blond head talking to one of the receptionists.

It only took a few second for Troye’s mind to start spinning with fear, confusion, and sadly most of all, a sudden burst of hope at thinking that Tyler was there to look for him. And then the man – a stranger, not Tyler – had looked to his side to smile and shake hands with one of Troye’s coworkers, who was there to greet her visitor.

In the meantime, Caspar had barely noticed Troye falling out of step, and turned around confusedly just in time to witness Troye’s defenses crumble, right there in the lobby of their office. Closing his eyes against the flood of hot tears, Troye reached out blindly to his side to grab hold of the wall and try to draw breath through the pain in his chest. He felt a pair of hands grab hold of his shoulders and heard Caspar’s hushed voice ask him he was okay.

No, he was not okay. Because he’d thought he had something special with Tyler and that they could come to mean more to each other than what he’d ever have anyone beside his family mean to him before. And seeing someone who resembled the source of his current heartbreak, so soon after slowly starting to really realize that it wouldn’t happen the way he’d hoped it would, just reminded Troye all over again of how lonely he truly was. Perhaps that’s what hurt most of all.

Caspar had then slowly guided Troye into the communal, yet thankfully unoccupied, restroom and urged him to take a moment to collect himself before heading home early. Troye was still fighting to regulate his breathing and only nodded in reply when Caspar reassured him that he’d cover for him, should anyone ask where he’d gone, and take care of his last reports of the week.

Leaning on his hands against the sink in front of him, Troye had whispered “thank you” and caught Caspar’s eyes in the mirror with a weak smile. Caspar, having to hurry back in case anyone had already started to miss them, left with one last order for Troye to take care of himself and that he’d call later that evening.

That had been over half-an-hour ago. Troye still hadn’t ventured out of the blessedly empty room due to his emotions returning in waves when he kept accidently reminding himself of why he was locked in the restroom in the first place, and he didn’t want to risk crying in public. It didn’t matter that he knew practically no one who could happen upon him on his way home; just the thought of anyone seeing him being this pathetic was enough to keep him from trying. And home didn’t seem all that appealing at the moment anyway. All that waited for him there were just silent walls and his own thoughts. Troye just hadn’t figured out where to go instead.

Reaching for yet another paper towel to wipe his face with, Troye stilled as the restroom door swung open. His eyes darted up to see a familiar man enter the brightly lit space and felt his stomach drop. Of course it had to be him. Wasn’t it just a sick twist of fate to have David see him like this, and all because of Tyler, no less.

“Troye!” David gasped as soon as he realized Troye was standing there, and stared for a moment as he paused behind him. 

Troye yanked out a couple of paper towels from the wall mounted holder and began dabbing quickly at his face. He straightened his back and glared at David through the mirror. “David,” he acknowledge as monotonously as he could, just wanting to escape. Funny, really, how fast his mood shifted from blubbering fool to a living, breathing icicle just as soon as he saw the other man.

“What’s going on?” David rushed closer and placed a hand on Troye’s shoulder, his face and voice alike colored by distress.

Sliding his shoulder out from underneath David’s palm, Troye stepped back and turned to throw the wad of paper towels in the trash. “It’s nothing,” he sighed and nodded his head at David before taking a step towards the door. “Have a good weekend.”

“It doesn’t look like nothing,” David said gently as his hand lifted back up to Troye’s upper arm, halting his movements. Troye felt himself bristle as his eyes snapped back to David’s.

“Even if it was anything, it wouldn’t be any of your business,” Troye spoke in a carefully measured tone. “Now, you go on with your day. I’m heading out.”

“Alone?” David followed up quickly, seemingly unperturbed by Troye’s words. From the now smaller distance between them, the eyes that darted across Troye’s face looked to be filled with actual worry.

Troye hesitated. “That’s the plan,” he replied in a way that made it sound almost like a question, as if he wasn’t really sure of the truth of what he was saying.

“I’m not trying to pry. I’m only asking because you really don’t look like you’re in any condition to be alone right now, Troye,” David argued and he sounded so genuinely concerned, so friendly in his attention, that Troye wondered if maybe it wasn’t all a ruse of David’s to lift his regard of him. “Will there be anyone there to take care of you when you get home?”

Troye flinched and closed his eyes, and David must have noticed and understood the reason, because his grip in Troye’s arm tightened just a smidgeon.

“Oh, I didn’t mean to…” David continued in a softer tone. “Oh, man. That’s it isn’t it? Troye… I’m truly sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Troye whispered and breathed in deeply before blinking his eyes open. None of what had happened was David’s fault anyway, so it didn’t really make any sense to be angry with him over it. “You couldn’t have known.”

“Still…” David trailed off and his eyes flittered around for a moment, as if searching for words. “Tell you what. I have a few hours’ overtime that I need to take out anyway. Why don’t I keep you company for a while, just so you can settle down a bit? What do you say to a coffee?”

Troye felt David squeeze his arm one last time before his hand fell away to gesture toward the door in invitation. He weighed his options: go home and sit in his empty apartment with only his depressing thoughts to listen to, or while away a portion of what was bound to be a long afternoon and night in the company of someone who seemed to be willing to be a shoulder to cry on. The last option seemed much more appealing.

Troye’s mind flashed with an image of himself huddling over a glass of vodka in a dingy bar somewhere, weeping his sorrows into his booze, and suddenly the siren song of the numbing effects of alcohol grazed his ears.

“Actually,” Troye said as he reached up to loosen his constricting tie a bit. “A drink might be nice.”

-x- 

“Number 314, right?”

“Mhm,” Troye nodded slowly in confirmation from the backseat of the cab he was sharing home with David. He hadn’t asked the other man to go with him. David had insisted that Troye needed help to get home safely.

Perhaps he hadn’t been exaggerating, though, since Troye was currently having a hard time keeping his eyes open more than just the tiniest bit, making him squint at his surroundings in slow concentration in order to follow what was happening around him. David had had a few drinks too, but probably not as many as Troye, since he didn’t seem to be slurring his speech in the slightest as he asked for the umpteenth time if Troye was okay.

“I’m fine,” Troye said with a bit of a whine. “God, stop acting like my father. You’re not, okay? And you’re not my boyfriend either, so quit hovering.”

“I know that, Troye. I’m just making sure you’re alright,” David answered gently as he paid the driver and exchanged thanks and well-wishes with getting Troye safely inside.

“Well, cut it out. You know I’m not,” Troye huffed as he opened the car door and stumbled out as gracefully as he could onto the sidewalk in front of his apartment building. It wasn’t gracefully at all, of course, and soon David had hurried around the cab to lend him a hand as Troye clung to the still open door to keep his balance.

“I know you’re hurting over all this Tyler-business, but it’ll feel better after you get some sleep.” David wrapped Troye’s arm over his shoulder and slowly began leading him inside and up the stairs. “And some perspective,” he added a bit more silently.

Troye's drunken thoughts currently lingered on the picture they must make to anyone who happened to see them and snorted loudly as he imagined Tyler being one of them. “I wonder what Tyler would say if he knew that I was the one enjoying a bit of company tonight for a change,” he giggled as David held the main door open for them to stumble inside and he almost didn’t hear David’s gasp.

“Don’t tell me he cheated on you,” David had stopped walking and stared down at Troye, who hung limply from his shoulder.

Troye shook his head with conviction, in the slow, overacting way that people under the influence tended to do. “No!” he said loudly, and was momentarily fascinated by the echo that rolled through the stone staircase. “I mean… Not in the regular way, anyway.”

“That doesn’t make sense,” David huffed as he began dragging Troye up the first flight of stairs.

“Hmm,” Troye hummed and didn’t really notice how he was being tugged along more than walking on his own. “You know when a guy’s married to his job? S’kinda like that,” he mumbled through lips that where beginning to go slack.

“It doesn’t really matter what he did, anyway, Troye,” David said around a few puffs of heavy breath as he continued to practically carry Troye up the stairs. “In the end, he hurt you, and that means he doesn’t deserve you.”

“Maybe not...” Troye mumbled and then grew quiet as his eyes fell closed entirely, now not even trying to walk anymore, but still moving forward somehow. It wasn’t until he was placed against the unforgiving stone wall outside his door that Troye won back some of his senses again, growing alert when he felt David start patting his pockets.

“Hey, what-?” Troye tried as his eyes widened and he began swatting at David’s arms.

“I need your keys,” David insisted, and maybe it was the alcohol that addled his brain, but Troye was sure he suddenly heard a bit of impatience leak into David’s voice. That, and the unbidden touches had Troye’s mind clearing just enough to know that perhaps it was time for David to leave.

“I’ve got it, you can go now. Thanks,” Troye said with a nod that turned out deeper than he’d intended and when he wrenched his head back to reverse the dizzying effect, he thumped it hard against the wall behind him. “Ow, fuck!” he yelled and squeezed his eyes shut while lifting his hand to the back of his head.

“Stop messing around! Just give me-” David began in a firm tone, when Troye cut him off.

“What the fuck am I doing?” Troye whispered, his heavy eyes darting wildly around him as his current situation suddenly dawned on him. There he was, drunk out of his wits with a man he didn’t really know, and liked less, moaning like a loser over the loss of a man he’d essentially pushed away. “What the _fuck_ was I thinking?”

“Well, if you would just give me your keys, you could be snuggled up on your bed right now, but-” David explained in much the same way that one would a fussy child, before Troye interrupted him again.

“No, I mean with Tyler,” Troye said, not sure why he was elaborating on this for David’s sake but rationalizing it as a means for David to stop going on about the damn keys.

“Troye, there’s no need to dwell on it. You’re gonna need to move forward. Without him,” David’s voice grew gentler again and he held Troye by his arms, probably half in comfort and half in support to keep him standing.

“It just hurts so fucking much,” Troye whispered and lifted his eyes to focus on David’s face for a few silent seconds. He had no idea why, because there was certainly nothing funny about any of this, but suddenly he was giggling like a maniac. Before long, he was fighting hard to keep snorts of cackling laughter from erupting from his lips.

“Oh, Troye,” David cooed, one of his hands lifting to stroke Troye’s cheek. “You’ll get over this.”

Troye’s laughter vanished as quickly as it had appeared and, once he grew still again, Troye’s surroundings were spinning more than they had been just a few moments before. He closed his eyes again and reached up to blindly clutch at David’s shoulders lest he let the world tilt on its axis and throw him to the ground.

“What if I don’t?” he panted weakly while trying to fight the nausea that churned in his stomach like sea sickness.

“You will. Maybe you just need some help to get there,” David whispered and Troye barely registered the way his hand stroked over his cheek once more, even less did he hear what he was saying. “Maybe I can help you with that...” David’s hand dropped to Troye’s clavicle and his fingers began slowly trailing down the length of Troye’s heaving chest.

Troye sighed as he began to regain some control on the spinning in his head, and when he eventually noticed David’s touch, he tensed. He was wearing the tie he’d gotten from Tyler and David currently had his fingers all over it. David had no business touching anything of Tyler’s, even if was just a simple grey silk tie. That silk tie carried more sentimental meaning to Troye than it probably ever had in monetary value.

Troye blinked his eyes open as far as he could and began wiggling his shoulders in protest. “No, David-” he tried but was interrupted.

“It's okay, I’m here,” David whispered, as if Troye hadn’t spoken at all, and wrapped his hand around Troye’s tie while leaning in.

David crashed their lips together almost painfully and Troye’s shout of protest went unheard as it was muffled against David’s mouth. Troye clenched his eyes shut as the world spun wilder once again with the added panic that rose within him. He pressed his hands against David’s shoulders and clamped his lips together tightly in an effort to keep the touch from lasting any longer than it already had. When David wouldn’t budge even an inch, Troye pushed harder, his drunken mind not realizing that his attempts were futile since David was still clutching his tie in a tight grip to keep him in place.

All the pain inside Troye was magnified by David’s touch and his mind was crying out for someone to save him from it. This was so wrong. This wasn’t _Tyler_.

The floor wobbled underneath him, and he felt like he was going to be sick any second, when he finally came to his senses enough to turn his face away, wrenching his mouth from David’s. He gasped on a few panting breaths and opened his mouth to start shouting in outrage. And then he opened his eyes as well.

Troye wished he never had. If he hadn’t, he would have been spared the sight that made his heart stutter to a stop and the ground disappear from beneath his feet. His surroundings were closing in on him and all Troye could do was to stare back at the man that stood by the staircase, a mask of solemn grief on his face.

“Tyler.” The name left him as if on his last breath, whispered and yet resonating like the blast of a foghorn in the silence of the hallway.

The sound seemed to shake Tyler from his initial shock, and Troye’s entire body became solid ice as Tyler’s face morphed into an expression of cold acceptance.

“Glad to see you’re moving on so quickly.” Tyler’s gaze lingered where it was locked with Troye’s across the distance for a moment longer, before he turned around and began disappearing down the stairs.

Troye tried to form words, to shout Tyler’s name, to scream - anything to make him come back. But no sound could escape his tightly closed throat, and when his blurring vision fell to the flowers left on the floor where Tyler had stood only seconds before, Troye’s world crumbled.

-


	16. It's Always Darkest Before The Dawn

-

The sensation of falling backwards brought Troye back to awareness and he groaned weakly as he felt his back sink into soft cushions.

"There we go," a voice whispered from somewhere above him as arms slipped out from under his shoulders and knees. "That's better."

Blinking his heavy eyelids open a tiny bit, Troye tried to lift his head and saw David's blurry face hover in front of him in the dim light of his living room. How did he get there?

"What's -?" He stopped short when the movement of his head made the room sway, and the sharp contraction of his stomach told him that he was dangerously close to emptying the contents of his stomach. With a whimper, Troye let his head fall back again, closed his eyes, and swallowed repeatedly as bile burned his throat.

"No no, don't move," David hushed him and placed his palm on top of Troye's forehead, which was damp with perspiration. "Better stay put until you feel better."

Troye rolled his head to the side and brought his arm up to push David's hand away. It landed on his shoulder instead, and Troye didn't have the energy to try to remove it again. He tried to collect the jumble in his spinning head but couldn't for the life of him remember how or why he'd ended up lying on his couch. All he could recall was being close to vomiting, followed by an indistinguishable pain and then darkness.

"How'd you get the door open?" Troye asked quietly, noticing how dry his mouth was.

David giggled from his seat on the edge of the cushion by Troye's middle. Troye wondered sluggishly if he'd said something funny, and he braved opening his eyes again to frown in question at David.

"I got the keys out of your pocket, silly. You blacked out for a minute there after your ex had a hissy fit."

Troye's stomach plummeted and his eyes widened as David's words triggered his memories of Tyler watching them out in the hallway. But David just rolled his eyes and smiled. "Don't worry, though, he's gone now. I think he got the message. He's not gonna hurt you anymore."

“Oh god," Troye gasped as panic started to rush through his veins. "Tyler. He thinks that I... that we... No. No no no, this isn't happening, I'm having a nightmare," Troye whispered, his words coming out jumbled. Adrenaline made him lift his upper body despite the way his stomach turned. "I have to find him, I can't let him think -"

He didn't get the chance to sit up fully before a pair of hands pushed him back down again, and Troye's eyes flew back to David's frowning face. "Stop it. You're in no condition to be running after anyone," David insisted as his voice grew sterner. "Here, I'll help you with your jacket, and then we can cuddle up with a nice, warm blanket."

David's face softened once more and he stroked his hand through Troye's fringe, and Troye recoiled from the touch. David was acting so strange, as he was truly unhinged, and he reached for the lapels on Troye's jacket. When he began tugging it down, Troye's panic multiplied and as if by magic, he felt instantly sober as he began struggling against David's hands.

"No, leave me alone," he said loudly, trying to wiggle away further up the couch. David wouldn't budge, however, and Troye opened his mouth to protest when the sound of the door opening after a quick knock made him pause. David's movements stilled instantly.

"Troye?"

Troye's breathing hitched as relief washed over him at the familiar voice. His eyes locked with David's and noted a look of worry on his startled features.

Caspar.

Troye started struggling against David's hold with renewed energy as Caspar's voice grew steadily closer to the living room.

"Was that Tyler we just saw driving off as if the devil was on his tail? Are you oka-?" Caspar abruptly stopped speaking just when Troye could see him materialize in the corner of his eye. Troye was sure he would have been able to hear a pin drop in the silence that settled in the short second before Caspar shouted, "What the hell are you doing here?!"

Barely a blink of an eye later, David's form was roughly pulled away, and Troye turned his head swiftly to see David now dangling from the grip of a murderous looking Sawyer.

They made quite the picture, actually, with David's hands flying up to grip Sawyer's wrist where his fists twisted in David's shirt. Sawyer was probably choking him pretty bad, since David's face was growing a deep red and his eyes wild with fear, while Sawyer's muscled arms bulged under the strain of lifting him to the point of making David's feet lose contact with the floor.

"Who are you and what the fuck are you doing to Troye?!" Sawyer roared in his face.

Troye sat up on his elbows and Caspar rushed forward to grip his shoulders while kneeling by the side of the couch. "Troye, what's going on? Are you hurt?" Caspar's eyes flew worriedly over his features, and Troye briefly reflected on how his friend had never looked that serious before.

He shook his head and whispered, "What... How did you..?"

"We were on our way to the bar and decided to check in on you. Thank fuck for that," Caspar added in a rush of breath as Troye focused back on the scene unfolding just behind Caspar's back.

"I didn't do anything, I swear!" David squeaked from where Sawyer was still holding him up by his collar.

"Don't give me that bullshit, dude," Sawyer growled while he tilted his head menacingly. "He's fighting to push you off while you're pulling at his clothes, and you're telling me you didn't do anything? Troye?" Sawyer turned his head to look at him. "What'd he do?"

Troye blinked, unsure of what to say. Sawyer was angrier than he'd ever seen and Troye was still reeling from how suddenly things where happening around him. He might not be feeling the effects of the alcohol to the same extent as earlier, but they were still making his mind work slower than usual.

"He- he forced me to kiss him," Troye stuttered, his heart squeezing painfully again at the thought of the look on Tyler's face. Troye looked down at his lap, missing how Sawyer's head whipped back around to glare at David with narrowed eyes once more.

Caspar's hands tightened on Troye's shoulders and he leaned in closer for a moment to sniff the air between them. Once he settled back again, he shot Sawyer a look. "Seems like he made sure Troye was well and truly drunk, too."

Sawyer shook his head slowly from side to side while clicking his tongue at David. "Wow... You're just asking for it now," Sawyer said, his voice a deep, rasping rumble as he walked forward to press David's back against the wall.

"Hang on a second!" David choked out and tried to shake out of Sawyer's grip. "He drank all that himself. He's a grown man, I didn't pour those drinks down his throat!" he protested indignantly.

"But you didn't stop him either," Caspar said as he stood up. "I hope you understand that the cops aren't the only ones who're gonna find out about this. Maybe you should consider looking for a new job Monday morning, because I'm sure your manager at human resources will just love hearing about how you sexually assault your colleagues." The slow smirk on Caspar's face was nothing short of terrifying.

Troye sat up gingerly, only then noticing a dull pain in the back of his head. He reached back to rub at the small bump where he'd hit his head earlier and continued to watch the proceedings. He didn't think he'd ever been happier to have such good friends, or been so lucky as to have them appear out of nowhere when he needed them the most. But as he watched Sawyer start to drag David toward the door, a sinking feeling of hopelessness settled over him and he pulled up his knees to hide his face in them.

The cushion beside him sank under the weight of a warm body and a steady arm reached around Troye's shoulders just as Troye began to realize the full extent of what had happened earlier. "He just wouldn't stop," he whispered and the arm around him tightened as Caspar pulled him closer against his side for support. "I tried so hard but I couldn't push him away." Troye's whimper of anguish was muffled against the fabric of his pants.

"He's not getting away with this, Troye. I'll make sure of it," Caspar tried to sooth him and began rubbing his hand over Troye's arm.

"You don't understand," Troye continued while shaking his head against his knees, his grip on his own legs tightening to the point of pain. "Tyler... He saw! He saw David kissing me and now he thinks that I couldn't care less about him. I don't want him to think that I would do something like that." A lump clogged his throat and Troye had a hard time breathing through it.

The front door closed gently out in the hallway and Troye felt Caspar shift to look up at whom he assumed to be Sawyer walking back into the living room. No one said anything, however, and the silence stretched on for a moment longer. Troye drew an unsteady breath and leaned his head on Caspar's shoulder.

"What am I gonna do?" he whispered into the silence.

Caspar's hand stilled briefly before resuming its gentle stroking. "It'll be okay," Caspar whispered back. "We'll fix it... Somehow."

-x-

A gentle shake to his shoulder lifted Troye from his dreamless sleep. Burrowing his head further beneath the cover, Troye gave a short groan in response to show that he was awake, even if that was the last thing he wanted to be.

"It's almost 6 pm, you've slept through the entire day again," Caspar's voice was soft as he shook Troye's shoulder once more for emphasis. "You need to eat something. I've made you some pasta."

Troye blinked his eyes open and slowly shifted to peek out from his cocoon of bedding. The bedroom was cast in shadow due to the closed blinds in his window and the stuffy air surrounding him smelled like sleep. "I'm not hungry," he rasped quietly and tightened the cover around his shoulders as he focused on a spot in the space in front of him, looking at nothing in particular.

"It's Sunday, Troye. It's been two days," Caspar replied levelly. "You're eating the pasta I made for you, end of discussion."

Troye glanced up at his friend, noting the small frown across his brow. Caspar practically hadn't left the apartment since the incident two nights earlier, having slept on Troye's couch and only gone out to buy groceries and get a change of clothes. And Troye had barely left his bed during the same length of time, only venturing out from his self-inflicted isolation to use the bathroom.

Food hadn't appealed to him at all, even though Caspar had quickly gotten up from his seat in front of the TV yesterday when Troye had emerged from the bedroom late afternoon, asking if Troye would like some dinner. Troye had just ducked his head and given it a slight shake in reply, hurrying to close and lock the bathroom door behind him to avoid having to talk.

"And if I don't?" Troye asked, holding Caspar's gaze in what could have been a silent challenge if it wasn't for the absolute despondency that colored his entire body language.

Caspar sighed deeply and shook his head. "Then I guess you'll eventually just starve to death," he retorted and stared back. Silence stretched on during long seconds before his shoulders sagged as he gave a short huff, his eyes filling with worry and a hint of desperation. Troye quickly averted his gaze back to the spot in front of him, not willing to see his friend look at him like that.

"Troye. You can't stay cooped up in here forever," Caspar argued gently, his voice turning plaintive.

'Watch me,' Troye thought but didn't say anything out loud when Caspar continued, "I, at least, have to go to work tomorrow, and I can't stand the thought of having to leave you alone while you're like this."

Troye blinked slowly, but didn't bother to show in any other way that he'd even heard Caspar. Not that he wasn't grateful that his friend had literally dropped everything to look after him, but in his current state of mind, Troye wasn't able to rise from his own gloom for long enough to show that he cared.

Everything was in shambles and it was all his fault. Troye had never meant to hurt Tyler like this. Of course Troye couldn't have foreseen what David was going to do while he was that drunk, and he certainly couldn't have known Tyler was going to show up to witness it. But if Troye had just thought one step further, he could have prevented all of it from happening the way it had.

While he still tried to convince himself that he'd made the right decision when it came to their dysfunctional relationship, Troye couldn't deny that he missed Tyler more now than he ever had during the times they'd been apart before. He missed him so much he could practically taste it in the back of his throat. It took every ounce of his self-control to keep from continuously whimpering like an injured animal at the desperate longing in his heart.

The sharp clank of ceramic against a wooden surface jerked Troye out of his reverie and he blinked up at Caspar's determined features in surprise. Troye hadn't even noticed that he'd left the room while being lost in thought, but now realized that Caspar was returning with a bowl of pasta and had placed it, along with a tall glass of water, on his nightstand with conviction.

"Eat," Caspar said in a voice that brooked no argument and nudged Troye's legs aside to sit on the bed. Caspar folded his legs underneath him and settled down, facing Troye and resting his chin on his knuckles as he stared at him. Troye frowned at him through his lower lashes, narrowing his eyes.

"Look, I wasn't going to play this card, but you've left me no choice," Caspar continued while tapping his fingers against his knee. "How do you ever expect to patch things up with Tyler if you don't pick yourself up and at least try to not waste away in misery?"

Caspar tilted his head in the direction of the plate of food with lifted eyebrows, looking back at Troye expectantly. Troye held his stare, trying to deny the logic of Caspar's words but failing quickly.

With a heavy sigh, Troye slowly sat up on his elbows and scooted up to rest in a half-sitting slouch against the headboard. He turned his head to eye the bowl carefully before reaching out to bring it onto his lap.

"One bite at a time." Caspar's voice was softer this time and Troye glanced up to see a small smile forming on his lips.

Looking back down again, Troye sighed and grabbed the fork that been placed inside the bowl, twirling a few strands of spaghetti around it and lifting it to his mouth. The garlicy tomato sauce had gone slightly cold. Still, as his senses were suddenly hit by the burst of flavors in his mouth, Troye had to admit (if only silently to himself) that it was actually quite good. He flickered his gaze to Caspar and slowly began to chew.

"Good boy," Caspar chuckled happily.

Troye rolled his eyes and fought the answering smile that tugged at the corners of his lips while he swallowed. Lowering his gaze to the bowl in his lap, he twirled the fork again.

-x-

Caspar didn't force Troye to go into the office that Monday, nor the day after, admitting without saying as much that Troye would probably do better to stay away from the added pressure of performing at work while trying to get his head sorted out.

He did, however, show up at Troye's door right after work, clearly reluctant to leave Troye alone for too long. Arms laden with take-out that smelled like heaven and smile stretching from ear to ear, Caspar was obvious in his support and Troye felt his spirits lift by miles when he let his friend inside to set up their dinner on his living room table. It wasn't enough to make him completely forget about his heartache, but it helped and for that, Troye was grateful.

While digging in to their curry, Troye listened attentively to Caspar's vivid recounts of The Demise of the Dickhead, as he had decided to dub the events that he'd witnessed earlier that day. First thing Caspar had done upon arrival at the office was to march right into the office of David's supervising manager at human resources and told her exactly what he'd found her employee doing that Friday night.

Needless to say, Ms. Clarkson hadn't been pleased and had been adamant that Caspar get Troye to file an official report so that her following actions would be well-founded upon later review. Because once David showed up, a good portion later than what was appropriate, his ass had been fired faster than he could say 'good morning'.

Apparently, Ms. Clarkson had been itching to let him go for a long time and was reluctant to let the opportunity pass once she had a solid reason. And while David had blubbered and sobbed his way through clearing up his desk, Ms. Clarkson had lifted the phone to make a call. Upon leaving the building, still causing quite the ruckus to the amusement of all who saw, David walked right into the arms of the LAPD.

"Which means you'll have to go down to the station within the week to leave a statement if you want to press charges," Caspar mumbled around his mouthful of spicy chicken and waved his fork at Troye.

Troye waggled his head from side to side, chewing in silent thought for a moment before swallowing his bite. "I'll think about it. Maybe getting fired was enough for him to realize he did wrong."

"I wouldn't let him get away that easily but I guess that's up to you. Besides, that's not the end of it. I still haven't told you what happened later," Caspar smiled mysteriously, scraping the last bits of rice and bright red curry sauce off his plate before launching into the next part of his story telling.

After David had been taken away by L.A.'s finest, two colleagues of his had been assigned the task of going through his computer and sorting out the work he'd left behind. It hadn't been long before odd little remains and notes about David's private tax returns started showing up. That had drawn their attention and as they dug deeper, the more it dawned on them that David had been doing more than just managing staff relations.

Working for an accountant firm, David had apparently thought he had all the inside knowledge on how to pull off tax fraud and had done so for several years.

"Nothing wrong with confidence," Caspar lifted a finger in emphasis. "But the problem with arrogant people like Dickhead is that they always seem to think they can get away with anything. I'd like to see him try to charm his way out of the hands of the IRS."

Troye almost cringed in sympathy just at the mere thought of the consequences that the man was most likely facing now. Almost. Instead, he found himself smiling and not feeling the slightest bit guilty about it.

He caught Caspar's eye from across the table where they were sat on one side each of the L-shaped couch and couldn't help the giggle that escaped him. Caspar snorted loudly in response and that was all they needed to both be set off into hysterics. Tears of mirth were soon leaking from the corners of Troye's eyes and he clutched his middle while leaning back to try to regulate his breathing in between returning onsets of bubbling giggles.

They became lost in thought and sat in companionable silence for long minutes after their laughter ebbed away, small smiles still lingering on their faces. Eventually it was Caspar who broke the stillness. "How's that for a birthday present, huh?"

Troye's smile dimmed a little and he quickly let his gaze fall to his hands, which were fiddling with his paper napkin. He'd nearly forgotten that it was his birthday with all that was going on. There wasn't much to celebrate about it, anyway.

"Have you tried to get a hold of Tyler at all?" Caspar asked gently when Troye didn't reply, and Troye glanced up at him to find his friend giving him a searching look.

As irony would have it, this time it was Tyler who wasn't picking up his phone when Troye tried to call him. Not that it was any surprise with what he must be thinking about Troye and what he saw him do.

"I tried calling him today, multiple times, but there was no answer." Troye felt his shoulders sag in disappointment despite knowing it wouldn't be that easy. "I don't even know what I would've said if he'd picked up anyway. What's to say he would even listen to me when I tell him that I wanted no part of what he saw? That it wasn't on purpose?"

Caspar scooted a little closer, settling in the corner of the couch and putting his feet up, crossing them at the ankles. Troye turned in his seat to face him and pulled up his knees to rest his chin on them while he continued to play with the napkin. "Why wouldn't he listen?" Caspar prodded and Troye shrugged.

"I don't know... But it's not like I ever told him how much he means to me," he said and paused to glance up at Caspar, waiting for a reaction. But if Caspar even recognized the admission for what it was, he didn't show it.

Troye lowered his gaze again and continued, "You should have seen the look on his face. I might as well have told him he wasn't worth the dirt underneath my shoes. And he'd brought flowers too..." Troye's throat tightened as he felt his eyes heat up with a new onset of guilty tears. He lifted his hand and pressed his fingertips into his closed eyelids and breathed slowly, not sure if he could add anything more to the conversation.

"Sounds to me like he came to make amends for whatever happened that made you so... sad," Caspar offered gently but Troye didn't look up; just pressed his fingers into his eyes with more force.

"Pointing that out doesn't make me feel any better, you know," Troye murmured from behind his hand.

"No, but what I mean is that there's not a man in this world that hasn't bought his partner flowers when he needs to apologize for messing up," Caspar explained quickly before going on in a more placating tone. "He clearly wanted you to forgive him for whatever went wrong. Perhaps you shouldn't be saying you don't have a chance to do the same thing before even trying?"

Troye sighed as he finally lifted his head again to look pleadingly at Caspar. "I don't know how to even begin doing that, though."

Caspar smiled at him and folded his hands in his lap, twiddling his thumbs. "We still have the number to the agency he works for. I say that's a good place to start."

-x-

It wasn't until two nights later, after Caspar and he had filled their bellies with another load of take-out, that Troye managed to gather up the guts to call Tyler's agency. He chewed on his bottom lip nervously and kept his gaze firmly on Caspar's eager face while he waited for someone to pick up. Maybe it'd be the same girl he'd talked to last time. It seemed like a lifetime ago that he'd called in search of Tyler after their first night together. Funny how history had a way of repeating itself...

Troye lowered his gaze as he got lost in memories of how things had played out after that. He'd been stupid not to realize earlier that that had been the moment he'd thrown himself headfirst into this. And he'd been more than happy to do so willingly, even if he hadn't understood what it would lead to at the time.

"Ganymede Escorting Services, how can I help you today?"

The forcefully friendly female voice broke Troye out of his thoughts and he blinked, quickly coming back to the present. She did indeed sound familiar and he smiled carefully.

"Is this Becca?" he asked and there was a short pause on the other end of the line.

"Who's asking?" was the guarded reply and Troye smiled a little wider, though he didn't know why. It wasn't like he knew this woman, but it felt good to hear her voice nevertheless.

"You probably don't remember me, but I'm Troye Mellet and I'm calling to ask if-"

"Tyler," Becca interrupted. "You're calling to ask about Tyler, right? Of course I remember you." Her tone grew deeper. "What did he do now?"

Troye didn't really know what to say to that and he glanced up at Caspar, who was making shooing hand gestures as if to usher him along. Not knowing what to say in response to her last question, he searched for a way to deflect by answering the first one instead.

"I- umm... Well yes I am, actually. I wanted to see if, um... I could get a hold of him through you? Or maybe book an appointment?" Troye heard how nervous he sounded and rolled his eyes at Caspar, who seemed to be consulting the ceiling for tips on mental stability after Troye's stuttered attempts at speaking, his arm falling limply to his sides in exasperation.

"I wish I could help you, doll," Becca went on over the speaker that was pressed against Troye's ear. "But you're barking up the wrong tree, since Tyler left us and all."

His back going rigid in a flash, Troye's breath caught and he felt his eyes widen as he registered what Becca had said. He saw Caspar lower his head back down to peer at him with a curious frown, but Troye didn't look up from where his eyes were staring at a spot somewhere in front of his knees.

"He what?" Troye gasped, his voice wavering from how hard his pulse was beating in his throat.

"He quit." Becca repeated, yet Troye was still unable to move a muscle, as if frozen on the spot. "Told me it was time for him to move on."

Then Caspar was waving his hand in front of Troye's face, trying to catch his attention and hissing a whispered, "What she saying?"

Troye blinked before scrunching up his nose and recoiling from his close encounter with Caspar's palm. Slapping at the hand in annoyance, Troye rose from his seat and stepped around his coffee table to get a chance to focus on what Becca was saying. "Do you know where he is now?" he asked, wiping his free hand on his jeans in an unconscious gesture of worry.

"I wish I could tell you, darling," Becca sighed in clear sympathy. "But not only is it against our policy to entrust the location of our escorts to former clients for safety reasons, I also genuinely don't know. If he's not home, then I don't know what to tell you. All I can say is that Tyler made his choice and it wasn't to stay with us."

Troye chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment, trying to gather his wits from the shock of learning that Tyler wasn't an escort anymore. Once the initial shock mellowed a bit, the knowledge made him almost giddy. Long, silent seconds ticked by and Troye realized he probably should say something soon and lifted his hand to run it through his hair.

"This is the second time you've turned me down in as many times we've spoken, you know," Troye offered levelly, yet felt a small spark of hope flicker to life somewhere deep in his chest again.

"Let's hope it's the last, shall we?" Becca replied and Troye gave a small smile at the assurance in her voice. "Look, I thought he would have fixed things with you by now, since that's what he said he'd do when I spoke to him almost a week ago," she continued, making Troye perk up at the mention of his involvement in Tyler's decision. "But Tyler's always going to be my friend and I hope that when we run into each other again, you and I, it's for completely different and much happier reasons."

Troye swallowed harshly, trying to ignore the butterflies that were filling his belly as he stood stock still in the middle of his living room, staring out at nothing. "Me too," he replied and lowered his phone to close the call.

"So..?" Caspar urged from his spot on the couch and Troye turned slowly to face his friend.

"He left the agency," he said on an exhale, hardly believing his own words. "And I think he did it because... because of me?"

Caspar gasped and slapped his hand over his gaping mouth, staring back at him with wide eyes, but Troye was too distracted to care about his friends' dramatic display. "That settles it then!" Caspar more or less shouted once he removed his hand again. At Troye's questioning look, Caspar opened his mouth to elaborate.

But he never found out what it was that was settled, because suddenly his phone started ringing and Troye jumped at the unexpected, shrill noise. He looked at the caller-ID and frowned when he didn't recognize the number.

Sliding the call open, Troye lifted the phone to ear. "Hello?" he asked gingerly, not sure what to expect or why he was suddenly so nervous.

"Have a shower, put on something cute, and brush your teeth. Be ready to go in fifteen minutes," a strangely familiar voice ordered from the other end of the call.

"What?" Troye sputtered and shook his head in bewilderment. "Who is this?"

"It's Tom and I am, in fact, standing outside your house right now," Tom replied as if it was the most normal occurrence in the world.

Troye rushed over to his window and pushed the curtain aside to peer out into the dimming light of early evening. Sure enough, there was Tom, leaning back against the side of a bright yellow Lamborghini with his legs crossed at the ankles. He gave a little wave in the general direction of Troye's apartment building and Troye huffed out a breath.

"Where are we going?" he asked, before quickly adding, "Wait, how do you even know where I live?"

"I have my ways," Tom explained and Troye watched as Tom lifted his arm to look at his wrist watch. "Just go get ready. We're gonna have to hurry if you want to catch Tyler before he leaves."

Troye's heart did a somersault. "Tyler?" he breathed.

"Yes. Tyler." Tom confirmed with conviction. "Now shoo!"

And then the call went silent as Troye saw Tom hang up and put his phone in the inner pocket of his navy blazer. Were they really going to do this? Now? Troye wasn't sure if he was ready to face Tyler just yet. He still hadn't come up with a game plan. To feel better and slightly less nervous, Troye was the type of person who needed to have a good think about what to say and do before making major decisions.

Troye's heart was racing and he stared for a moment longer at the man waiting for him out on the curb before almost having a heart attack when Caspar's voice spoke close to his ear, not having noticed him standing there.

"Jesus in a petticoat," Caspar whispered dreamingly and his eyes looked almost glazed over as he stared out the window. "That is a car." He sighed as if in longing and blinked a few times before turning his head to look at Troye. "Shotgun."

-x-

It wasn't easy trying to find something to wear 'to win over the heart of your future husband' (term courtesy of Caspar, of course) when you had a friend throwing endless, ridiculous options at your face. Thus Troye and Caspar emerged outside 22 minutes later and were met with the nothing less than pointed thunder of a 5 liter V10 engine roaring to life.

Caspar skipped up to the right hand side of the yellow sports car and opened the door to the passenger seat, bending at the waist to look inside. "Sweet ride," he grinned at Tom before tugging the backrest forward and gesturing for Troye to crawl into the miniscule backseat. Once Troye was settled, Caspar let the backrest click back into place and took his seat next to Tom.

"Thank you," Tom smiled back at him. "She's my favorite."

A mere split second after Caspar had pulled the door closed, Tom pressed the gas pedal. Troye's head jerked back from the sudden acceleration and scrambled to find the seatbelt.

"Why are we in such a hurry?" he piped up and met Tom's eyes in the rearview mirror. "Can't I just seek Tyler out in my own time?"

"I thought I told you to be careful, Troye," Tom said in a gently berating tone, ignoring Troye's questions, and Troye shifted as he felt a blush stain his cheeks. "But what's done is done and now you're gonna have to piece it back together."

With his emotions and nerves being all over the place at the prospect of facing Tyler sooner than he'd thought, Troye's brief embarrassment shifted into indignation as his face flushed hotter. "I'm not sure if I like this new trend of everyone telling me what to do," he argued, a frown forming on his brow.

Troye appreciated the concern, sure, but wasn't Tom stepping a bit out of line of what one would normally do for a friend? He was, after all, practically shoving Troye into Tyler's arms, commanding him make everything better again.

"Unless you want to wait another two months for this to be resolved, I strongly suggest that you do this now," Tom replied and shifted into a higher gear as they sped along the streets.

"Two months?" Troye's heart skipped a beat and his eyes widened. "Why would I have to wait-?"

"I'm leaving for the Hamptons for the summer and Tyler wants to come with me," Tom interrupted. "He's been staying at mine since Friday, and I only dropped him off at his place so he could pack up a few things. I'm supposed to be picking him up in 3 minutes and take us both to the airport." Tom paused and glanced at Troye through the mirror again. "And I'd rather not miss my flight, hence the rush."

Swallowing nervously, Troye silently accepted Tom's reasoning and tried to sort out his thoughts enough to prepare for what was apparently about to come. He suspected that Tyler wouldn't exactly be running into his arms, all smiles and sunshine, and Troye was suddenly curious about how Tyler had been acting after the devastating way things had gone last time they saw each other.

"Has he said anything about me at all since Friday?" Troye lifted his head back up to look at Tom's profile. "I mean, is he still upset with me?" he asked, hating how his voice wavered a little at the end.

Skillfully weaving the car through the traffic around them, Tom seemed to consider his words before replying, "To be honest, I think he's more upset with himself. I really don't think you have any reason to be worried that he won't give you a chance, but Tyler's a stubborn man. You're gonna have to out-stubborn him."

Tom's eyes crinkled at the corners and Troye saw the traces of a smile curve his cheek. Breathing a little easier, Troye settled back again to look out his window. If Tom was relaxed enough to be smiling, then perhaps it wouldn't be so bad after all.

With the car being what it was, the speed in which they were nearing Tyler's apartment wasn't that surprising and only mere minutes later, Troye found himself unfolding his body from the backseat and stepping out onto the curb. He turned back to look at Caspar, feeling suddenly very unsure of himself.

"Maybe I should have bought him something," Troye tugged at the bottom of his coal grey, long sleeved shirt, feeling slightly overdressed. "Feels a bit silly showing up without a peace offering of some sort."

"I think just you being here is gonna be enough for him," Caspar offered with a smile and a clap on Troye's shoulder. "Good luck, mate."

"You're not coming with me?" Troye asked, feeling his nerves set his pulse racing again as Caspar laughed.

"Want me to hold your hand too?"

"Would you?" Troye only half-joked as he tugged at his shirt again and glanced over his shoulder at the apartment building behind him. It almost seemed to be looming over him, and Troye turned back to take a deep breath as he closed his eyes.

"Look, it's going to be fine. You've been an absolute wreck after all this and it's gone on long enough," Caspar said, his tone placating as his hand squeezed Troye's shoulder briefly. "Now go in there and make sure you guys kiss and make up. I'll see you later."

Troye opened his eyes again and nodded at Caspar, willing himself to feel the confidence he was trying to exude. And so he turned and walked into Tyler's building with determined steps. Once he stood outside of his door, however, Troye hesitated to knock.

This was it. If Tyler turned him away now, Troye wouldn't be going back here again. It'd be the last he'd ever see of Tyler, unless they were to run into each other somewhere unexpected after this. Troye wasn't going to seek him out again if Tyler wanted nothing to do with him. It would be the end of everything and anything they had started to build together and Troye would have to move on.

A bumping noise from further inside Tyler's apartment made Troye's heart jump. There was no going back now.

Still wary of what was waiting on the other side of the door, Troye lifted his fist and rapped it against the wood a couple of times and then held his breath. When he noticed how badly his hand was shaking, he quickly let it drop back down to his side. Troye's heart was beating so hard he was sure it could be heard in the silence that followed as he waited for Tyler to answer his knock.

The sound of rapid footsteps drawing closer to the door practically made Troye's heart stop all together and he closed his eyes, afraid to witness whatever expression would be on Tyler's face when he saw Troye standing there. The lock clicked and time seemed to slow down.

"Hey, I'm almost fin-" Tyler's voice was cheery, if a bit rushed, before he stopped short on a hitched breath. A charged silence followed before there came a quieter, almost whispered, "You."

Troye's entire body was trembling as he slowly blinked his eyes open. His heart thumped once, as if coming back to life when he saw Tyler standing in front of him, his slightly mussed hair backlit by the bright light of his hallway and a flush of color staining his cheeks. For some strange reason, he had never looked better, and the butterflies in Troye's belly soared.

Tyler took a step back from his open doorway, in bewilderment or an attempt to put distance between them, Troye didn't know. "What are you doing here?" he whispered, his expression unreadable and his gaze intensely fixed on Troye's face.

Unconsciously taking a step forward, Troye held Tyler's gaze just as steadily as he drew a shaky breath. "I need to talk to you," he answered and was surprised by how well his voice carried despite his erratic heartbeat. "To apologize."

Tyler seemed to recover from his initial shock and shook his head, the movement so small that Troye barely caught it. "There's nothing to apologize for. I should never have let it get to this," Tyler murmured, his tone deep and carefully guarded. "And you're too late. I'm going away in just a minute. Tom's on his way to pick me up now."

"I know," Troye moved closer, a growing determination to make everything right again aiding his step. "He told me. Just... please, Tyler. We have to talk. Will you let me in?" Troye tried to focus on his shallow breathing as he waited. Tyler stood stock still, staring him down and seeming to contemplate his options for long seconds before giving a single nod and stepping back from the doorway.

Not wanting to give Tyler time to change his mind, Troye hurried over the threshold and closed the door behind him, still keeping his eyes on Tyler as if looking away would make him vanish into thin air.

Tyler voice was hard as he spoke again, his gaze growing dark as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Isn't your boyfriend gonna be mad about you being here?"

Troye's heart sped up at the mention of David and what Tyler had seen just a few nights ago. "I know what you must be thinking, but what you saw was a mistake. I was drunk and -" he didn't get to finish when Tyler gave a sudden bark of a laugh that sounded more bitter than humorous.

"Oh, really?" Tyler said as he lowered his face to give Troye a sardonic look.

"Yes, really!" Troye almost shouted and moved forward, but halted when Tyler quickly backed away, his eyes growing hard. "I was so out of it I would barely have been able to tell you my own name."

Silence stretched on as Tyler continued to stare at him with a doubtful expression and Troye's stomach churned as desperation began filling his chest. His breath was building up speed and became shallow as tears welled in his eyes at the way Tyler didn't seem to believe him.

"Tyler, he- I didn't want to-" the tears were threatening to spill over as Troye stumbled over his words. "I was trying to push him away, but he wouldn't let go and then you were there..."

Troye had to stop to draw breath and through the blurring of his vision, he could almost imagine Tyler's eyes growing slowly worried. "Please, you have to believe me! I would never..."

His words turned into a sob of despair and Troye lifted his hands to hide his face. Hating himself for being so weak when he needed to be stronger than ever, Troye just couldn't stop the tears from falling. His hitching inhalations were muffled by the palms of his hands and Troye began to wonder if maybe it was better that he left, as this was all going to pieces anyway.

But just as Troye started to turn toward the door, a hand caught his arm and turned him back around, and before he knew it, he was enveloped in a warm embrace. Another sob escaped him unbidden and, by reflex, Troye quickly wrapped his arms around Tyler's neck and buried his face in his shoulder.

His tears were staining the soft cotton of Tyler's shirt but he couldn't be bothered to care, because Tyler's steady hold around his body felt so safe and his scent was so calming that Troye could have stayed standing in the haven of his arms forever. Tyler's hand was slowly stroking up and down the small of Troye's back in steadying comfort, and Troye's chest filled with cautious hope.

"Are you saying he forced himself on you?" the deep rumbled of Tyler's voice murmured gently and if Troye wasn't already crying, he would have wept with relief at the hesitant sign that Tyler was accepting his words as truth. Troye nodded quickly against Tyler's shoulder and felt his arms tighten around his waist. "I'll kill him."

The unflinching conviction in Tyler's statement made Troye's heart leap - not in fear that Tyler would ever do something like that, but in joy of knowing that Tyler cared about him enough to say he would. The flame of hope inside him flared again to burn a little bit brighter.

Feeling a careful smile tug at the corner of his lips, Troye shook his head slowly. "You won't have to. He's being audited for tax fraud," Troye explained, his warm breath seeping into Tyler's shirt before he lifted his head. "Same thing."

Tyler leaned back to look at him and Troye's breath caught at the haunted concern in his eyes. Neither of them seemed to be about to let the other go. They just stood there; looking, searching, as if drinking each other in. 

Troye's heart was beating hard against his ribcage and he wondered if Tyler could feel it too. The concern in Tyler's eyes slowly gave way to contemplation as long seconds ticked by. Troye didn't even notice that he'd stopped crying until Tyler's hand suddenly lifted from his back to wipe away the tear tracks on his cheek with a careful stroke of his thumb.

"Come," Tyler coaxed gently and stepped back to reach for Troye's hand, folding it into his own. He gave a small tug and turned to lead them into his living room, where he sat them down on his couch.

Troye squeezed Tyler's hand when he seemed about to let go, weaving their fingers together instead. He tried to follow the myriad of curious expressions that flitted over Tyler's face but found that he could only identify apprehension as Tyler glanced down at their connected hands.

"I quit escorting," Tyler said and seemed to be waiting for a reaction from Troye. When a moment of silence had ticked by and he still hadn't gotten one, Tyler lifted his eyes back to look at Troye. A frown of questioning crinkled his brow and Troye couldn't help but smile when he realized Tyler must be thinking that his lack of a response meant he didn't care. For some reason, it was absolutely adorable.

"I know," Troye said and felt his smile widen. He almost felt like giggling when Tyler blinked at him in surprise before looking down at his lap again.

"Oh."

Troye tightened his fingers around Tyler's hand at the hesitance in his voice, partly to reassure Tyler and partly to steady himself, since he had to know if what Becca had hinted at was true.

"Did you do that for me?" Troye asked, hearing the blatant hope in his voice.

Tyler shook his head before halting the movement, seeming to change his mind about denying Troye's words and shrugging instead. "Maybe at first. I was going to tell you that night when I saw you..." Tyler sighed and looked back up, catching and holding Troye's gaze before he continued, "You say you were drunk and all, and I hate that man more than anything for making you do something you didn't want to. But how did you even end up there with him?"

"I was upset and he offered to pay for my drinks," Troye replied honestly, knowing that he had to be truthful no matter how stupid it seemed in hindsight. "It's no excuse, I know that, but I was so upset with you, Tyler. I was angry and so hurt by what you said the night before."

Tyler straightened his back as he listened, almost as if steeling himself. "Do you know why I said it?" he asked instead of acknowledging Troye's words about how he'd had a part in causing everything that had happened.

He drew a breath and seemed to be about to go on when Troye jumped in. "Because you're scared," he said levelly, trusting that he was right about Tyler's motivations.

Tyler hesitated for a brief moment before shaking his head. "Because every time I've opened myself up for possible heartbreak that is exactly what I've gotten."

Troye let his gaze soften with patience at Tyler's reluctance to see that he really hadn't denied Troye's statement by what he'd said. His knee bumped into Tyler's as he carefully scooted a little bit closer in his seat. Tyler didn't move away but eyed him almost warily, as if growing unsure of his own words and Troye's sudden confidence in his.

"You were just about to up and leave for two months without even letting me know first," Troye retorted gently. "How does running away from me prove that you're not afraid?"

He glanced down to watch as he reached over to close his unoccupied hand over the back of Tyler's, holding it within his two palms almost as if shielding it. He wasn't really expecting Tyler to answer the question he'd just asked, having intended it to be rhetorical, and quickly looked back up at Tyler's whisper.

"It doesn't." Tyler's eyes seemed to glitter in the light that was leaking from the hallway into the shadowy living room. Troye drew a shuddering breath as his chest swelled at Tyler's admission and he felt Tyler's fingers tighten around his, as if trusting their supporting grip.

"I'm scared too," Troye whispered back. "I'm fucking terrified. But I need you too much to allow my fears to stop me from telling you that I care about you. Because I do, Tyler. So, so much."

His heart was about to leap out of his chest from how fast it was beating. Troye didn't know where he was getting his bravery from but he moved even closer until the side of his leg was pressed against Tyler's. He saw Tyler gulp and only just then noticed Tyler's rapid breathing by how quickly his chest was moving.

"And I'm asking you to please stop running and tell me the truth," Troye said almost pleadingly, letting all his feelings for the man sitting next to him color his voice and fill his eyes, feeling them manifest as a fresh bout of hopeful tears.

Troye wished with all his might that Tyler would give them a foundation to build something on together, but knew that it was quite possible that he would be leaving with his heart truly and utterly broken. He wished that Tyler would tell him he cared about him too.

What he wasn't expecting where the words that, after a long pause, left Tyler on a rush of breath.

"I love you."

Troye's breath caught in his throat, his eyes growing impossibly wide as the rest of his body stilled in a heartbeat. He blinked back at Tyler, not knowing what to do or say. Blood roared in his ears while Tyler blushed.

"You..?" Troye tried but found it impossible to speak when his chest felt suddenly heavy with emotion. " _What_?"

He saw Tyler draw a deep, shaky breath and marveled at the careful smile that formed on his lips, as if Tyler felt an immense relief of having said it out loud.

"I'm in love with you," Tyler repeated with a bit more conviction.

If Troye hadn't understood the meaning of his words at first, something inside him seemed to click after hearing them again, and the breath he'd been holding left him on a rush that somehow turned his own lips up into a smile. The absolute elation that grew inside him was impossible to stave and a moment later, it manifested in the form of a giggle. Troye watched in fascination as the sound made Tyler's smile widen.

He was so caught up in the look of happiness on Tyler's face that he didn't notice that it was moving closer until the tips of their noses suddenly bumped together. Catching Troye completely off guard, the unexpected touch startled him and he gasped as his head jerked back to stare at Tyler in surprise.

Tyler's eyes widened at his reaction and Troye was dismayed to see the smile fall from his lips. "I- I'm sorry. I thought you- I'm sorry," Tyler stuttered. Seeming to search for something to add for a moment, Tyler fell silent and turned his face to the side, leaning back again and closing his eyes with a soft sigh.

Troye's heart fluttered like the wings of a caged bird as he realized that Tyler had meant to kiss him. And with sudden clarity, Troye knew that the one thing he could offer Tyler as a sign that he trusted him - that all he wanted was for Tyler to be his - was the innocent, almost fragile simplicity of accepting his kiss.

"No." Troye shook his head and reached up to cup Tyler's cheek. "Tyler," he murmured, letting his eyes soften as he turned Tyler back to face him. "Kiss me."

This time, it was Tyler's turn to look startled and Troye couldn't help but smile as he watched Tyler's eyes flicker down to his mouth. Troye stroked his thumb over his cheek and when Tyler began leaning in again, Troye's heart skipped a beat.

Tilting his head, Troye let his eyes fall closed as he felt Tyler's breath wash over his lips and he gasped at the first, tentative brush of warm lips against his. The touch was so delicate, so cautious that Troye couldn't help the little whimper that escaped him at the tenderness of Tyler's first careful caress.

Tyler's hand lifted to cradle his jaw, pushing his fingers into Troye's hair while his thumb rested over the skin just in front of his ear. Breathing in deeply through his nose, Tyler tilted his head further to the side and pressed a little closer, catching Troye's lips in a petal soft kiss.

Troye was positively melting and responded by slowly opening his lips, feeling Tyler mirror the movement. Their hot breaths mingled between them for a moment before Troye felt the tip of Tyler's tongue carefully lick into his mouth. Troye whimpered again and heard Tyler's soft moan in response as he nudged Tyler's tongue with his own, sliding them together.

Allowing their soft exploration for a moment longer, Troye eventually began to slowly pull back from the kiss. Their lips parted with a soft noise and Troye let his eyes flutter open to meet Tyler's joyous blue's, still so close to his own.

"I love you too," he whispered on a breath before leaning back in to taste Tyler's smile.

-


	17. Lay Here It's Safe Here I'll Let You Be Broken Open

-

“I love you too.”

The words were whispered so softly that Tyler might not have trusted his own ears if it wasn’t for the way that Troye’s breath washed over his lips as he spoke. The rapid beating of his heart and all-consuming feelings of pure elation were quickly making him lightheaded, and Tyler smiled as his vision confirmed that this wasn’t just a figment of his imagination.

Troye’s beautiful blue eyes were gazing back at him with such reverence, such adoration, that Tyler almost lamented their eclipse as they fell closed when Troye leaned in once more. Their lips connected with a strange sense of familiarity that shouldn’t be possible when this was only their second joining. Yet Tyler couldn’t deny the undeniable feeling of returning home after a long, wearisome journey, and he moaned when Troye’s hand slid to the back of his head to gently grip his hair. Tyler pressed closer and Troye’s mouth yielded oh so sweetly to his, opening and welcoming Tyler’s tongue inside as he carefully delved a little deeper.

Ever since they’d met, Tyler had been dreaming of how Troye’s plump lips might feel beneath his own, but he could have never imagined the reality of their touch – so full and soft and warm that it almost had Tyler weeping at the perfection that was the man he loved. The man who, in turn, loved him back.

Troye echoed Tyler’s moan and pulled his leg up to rearrange his body into facing Tyler fully. As the pace of their kiss slowly grew from gentle to something firmer, something with a flicker of determination behind every movement, Troye’s hand released Tyler’s from its grip and reached up to wrap around his shoulders. Tyler’s hand quickly found and tightened on Troye’s waist and then Troye was lifting himself slightly from his seat and moving even closer, crawling into his lap.

A whimper rose from Troye’s chest as he settled into place and Tyler breathed in a harsh gasp through his nose at the feeling. He hadn’t even noticed how excited he was until he felt the firm evidence of Troye’s arousal against his lower stomach added to Troye’s weight pressing down on the slight bulge underneath his zipper. Tyler’s breath hitched when Troye wrapped his legs around Tyler’s middle and angled his head to deepen their kiss even further, melding their open lips together with more urgency. He wrapped his arm more securely around Troye’s waist, clinging to him as Troye slowly rolled his hips forward.

Sharp pleasure flared inside Tyler at the carefully measured movement and he felt goose bumps rise on his skin as his blood started to run hotter. Troye moaned a bit louder and repeated the motion, this time with more purpose, drawing out the undulation of his hips as he nibbled gently on Tyler’s bottom lip.

Tyler groaned, pulling his mouth from Troye’s to breathe in gulps of air before he murmured, “Wait, maybe we should talk this out properly before we -”

He had to stop speaking at the whimper of need that left him when Troye pressed forward again and ran the tip of his tongue along Tyler’s lip, as if soothing the earlier visit from his teeth.

“- before we can’t stop,” Tyler finished on a shuddering exhalation. Slipping his hand to the back of Troye’s head, Tyler then belied his own words and pulled him in for a string of light kisses, capturing Troye’s lips in little suctioning tugs with his own.

Troye gave a soft moan and responded to each kiss, his fingers in constant movement where they tightened and relaxed repeatedly in Tyler’s hair. “Unless one of us says,” Troye said between kisses, “or does something stupid to ruin this too, I say we can talk after.”

Lingering on the following kiss for a moment longer, Troye rolled his hips once more. Tyler moaned and heard Troye’s choked little whine against his lips before Troye pulled away to pant between them. “Tyler... I need you.”

Tyler shuddered as a thrill traversed the length of his spine at Troye’s breathy words. His own hips jutted upwards on instinct at the sound and his hands flew down to grip Troye’s waist, just above his hipbones. It was all so overwhelming; things were moving so fast that it made his entire body tingle while his mind tried desperately to catch up.

“ _God_ , I love you,” Tyler gasped as he rested their foreheads together, closing his eyes. His heart thudded heavily with emotion while his fingertips curled into Troye’s flesh.

Troye tilted his head and mouthed carefully at Tyler’s lips as Tyler breathed shallowly. “Please, show me,” Troye whispered and Tyler clenched his eyes at the rush of hot arousal that pooled in his belly, making his length twitch against the warm firmness of Troye’s body resting in his lap.

With something close to a choked whimper, Tyler sealed their lips together and kissed Troye as if his sanity – his life – depended on it. Tyler stroked his hands down to cup Troye’s behind and he felt Troye wrap his arms around his neck and tighten his legs around his waist, a whimper leaving him in response to Tyler’s compliance to his pleas.

He knew what Troye was asking of him. Troye wanted Tyler to let his actions confirm his words. And Tyler wanted to spend the rest of every waking moment doing nothing else than show Troye just how much love he was capable of giving. Throughout the years and the countless sexual partners he’d had, Tyler had kept it all stowed up inside him with no one to place it on until Troye came along and awoke his sleeping heart.

Sliding his hands down to the back of Troye’s thighs, Tyler lifted some of Troye’s weight into his hands and began scooting out of his seat. Once he was standing, they balanced there for a moment before Troye lowered his feet to the floor and began walking backwards toward Tyler's bedroom, not allowing their kiss to falter for even a second.

Tyler stumbled along, neither of them opening their eyes to see where they were going – which, of course, meant it wasn’t long before Troye’s back ended up bumping into the corner leading to the little hallway. Their lips ripped apart with a loud smacking sound at the jolt and Tyler blinked his eyes open to see Troye’s features morph into a gently laughing expression.

“Oops,” Troye chuckled breathily before he leaned back in to resume the kiss.

Tyler reflected briefly on how they were both reluctant to pull away to even walk properly, like a pair of randy teenagers on a night alone in the house, and even though the thought was kind of amusing, he wasn’t about to do anything to make it stop. Instead, he happily complied when Troye maneuvered them a step to the side and started walking again, guiding them both to the open bedroom door.

Tyler stumbled a little when Troye came to a stop as his legs hit the side of the bed. Slowly leaning back to open his eyes again, Tyler felt his heart thud when he caught Troye’s gaze. Troye’s pupils were blown to cover some of the blue of his irises, making him appear slightly dazed yet fully focused on Tyler as if eager to follow his every move.

It certainly wasn’t the first time they’d done this, and it seemed improbable that it’d be the last, yet everything was different. It was as if the air smelled different, their touches felt different, every breath they drew sounded different. It was all wondrous and new and it felt so pure that, despite the deep hum of arousal simmering just below the surface, Tyler had to take a moment just to let it all sink in. Troye seemed just as affected as him and he stayed carefully still under Tyler’s slow scrutiny.

Then his hands were moving, sliding them up Troye’s front to the first in the row of buttons on his shirt, and began to undo them one by one. As the first sliver of pale skin was revealed below Troye’s long neck, Tyler leaned forward and bent his head to bestow it with a slow peck while fingers moved onward.

Troye sighed at the touch and Tyler moved lower with every button he opened, continuing a path of kisses down Troye’s chest until he was almost at his belly button before lifting back up slightly to nuzzle his way to one of Troye’s nipples.

He caught the dusky flesh, gently mouthing it with just his lips a few times before circling it with the very tip of his tongue. Hearing Troye release a shuddering breath at his ministrations, Tyler closed his lips over the hardening nub, letting his teeth just barely graze it as his fingers unclasped the last button.

Troye moaned, his fingers tightening in Tyler’s hair, and tugged him up from his chest to catch him in a deep, openmouthed kiss that was anything but hesitant. Tyler could tell Troye was growing impatient at the slow progress and although he didn’t want to rush things, Tyler heeded Troye’s silent pleas by reaching up to pull the shirt from Troye’s shoulders and down his arms as Troye released the grip on his hair.

The shirt had barely hit the floor by their feet when Troye was reaching forward again to trail his hands up Tyler’s sides underneath his t-shirt, quickly pulling it over his head when Tyler lifted his arms to help.

Leaning forward while his hands reached for the button and zip on Troye’s jeans, Tyler’s lips sought out Troye’s clavicle, kissing and sucking at the taught skin there before moving slowly up the side of Troye’s neck. He nipped gently at the corner of Troye’s jaw, feeling it clench underneath his lips as Troye swallowed.

Deft fingers reached for the fastenings on his own pants while Tyler trailed short little kisses along Troye’s jaw to the corner of his lips, where he lingered a bit before pulling back to glance down his own body. He watched as Troye lowered his zipper and let out a harsh sigh, closing his eyes tightly when Troye’s warm hand slipped inside to palm Tyler’s hard length over the cotton of his boxer briefs.

Tyler’s breath hitched. He let his hands slip just inside the edge of Troye’s jeans to curve them around to the little dip in the small of his back, enjoying the throb of arousal that pulsed through him while Troye stroked him slowly through the thin layer of fabric, adding pressure with the heel of his hand.

He felt Troye lean forward to pull Tyler’s earlobe into his warm mouth, sucking and nibbling gently while his breath washed over Tyler’s skin. Tyler moaned from somewhere deep in his chest and slid his hands further down under Troye’s open jeans, cupping his firm cheeks while pulling him closer. Troye released his earlobe to kiss at the soft spot underneath Tyler’s ear.

“Feel good?” Troye breathed against his skin and Tyler nodded, gasping as he felt Troye’s hand slip inside the elastic of his boxers to grip him firmly and give a few, deliberate strokes.

Tyler moaned and clutched at Troye, jutting his hips upward and into the firm touch, pleasure tingling all the way up to his scalp as his length slid through the tight funnel of Troye’s fingers. Tyler could have easily stood there for eternity, letting hot desire wash over him while being slowly brought closer to his completion by the warm grip of Troye’s hand, just breathing in synch with him as they held each other close. But his body, as well as his mind, was beginning to ache with an increasing need for more – more touches, more pleasure… more of Troye.

Tyler’s blood surged in his veins and he lifted his head to catch Troye’s lips once more. He groaned at Troye’s immediate, sweet surrender, knowing that he’d never be able to drink his fill now that he’d had his first taste. Troye whimpered; the sound as well as its source more addictive than any drug could possibly be and Tyler was more than ready to be enslaved by the need for another hit.

As his tongue sought entry between Troye’s lips, sweeping inside in deliciously wet caresses, Tyler lifted his hands to tug at the waistbands of Troye’s jeans and underwear, wanting him out of his clothes and on the bed right now. He’d waited long enough for this – the moment when he could truly share this intimacy with Troye and not have to worry about holding back for fear of revealing too much. For when he could let himself fall and trust that Troye would be there to catch him.

Once they were out of the rest of their clothes, Troye sat down on the mattress behind him, lifting his hands to Tyler’s neck and leaning back, bringing him with him. Tyler crawled in after him until they were settled somewhere in the middle of the bed, not breaking their kiss even once. He pressed Troye back against the sheets and settled down on top of him, falling in between Troye’s bent legs and covering Troye’s body with his.

Troye moaned into their kiss when Tyler tilted his hips back and pressed them forward slowly. The back of Tyler’s neck tingled from the flashes of pleasure that licked over his skin and he wrapped his arms around Troye’s back, holding him close as he rolled his hips again. Echoing Troye’s moan and letting his tongue lap deep into his mouth, Tyler relished in the feeling of holding Troye so close while long fingers carded through his hair. Troye’s mouth was so eager and warm and they were kissing as if their lives depended on it. For Tyler, in a way, it sort of did.

With a soft grunt, Tyler stilled his hips and leaned back from their kiss to open his eyes, finding Troye’s large blue ones blinking back up at him, and was once again astounded by the gift that the fates had bestowed upon him by bringing him this creature of absolute beauty and a gentle, yet fiery nature.

Tyler smiled secretly and pecked Troye’s lips one last time before lifting up to start reaching for the drawer in his nightstand, when a hand on his wrist made him halt. He turned his head back around to give a quirk of his eyebrow at Troye’s look of hesitance.

“Could we…” Troye whispered and licked his lips, his eyes glancing to the bedside table before focusing back on Tyler. “I was thinking maybe we could, you know… Try without?”

The words sounded a bit breathless and Troye drew his bottom lip into his mouth, gaze flickering searchingly between Tyler’s eyes. Tyler’s breath whooshed out of his lungs, overcome by a nearly dizzying rush of affection along with a hefty dose of sharp arousal. His erection jumped against their skin at the mere thought of what Troye was suggesting and he inhaled shakily through his nose as he closed his eyes to regain his equilibrium.

However, he knew it would be foolish to do what Troye was implying so soon after he’d left his line of work and with a twinge of regret, Tyler lifted his hand to cradle the side of Troye’s face. “You have no idea how much I want to, but we can’t.”

Badly hidden disappointment spread in Troye’s eyes like ink blotching pristinely white paper and Tyler stroked his thumb up over his cheek.

“Some day, though,” Tyler continued around a small apologetic, yet reassuring smile. “We just have to have to make sure we’re safe first. I don’t ever want to harm you.”

Troye blinked slowly and when he mirrored Tyler’s smile with a nod, Tyler leaned away again to rummage inside the drawer. He turned back around, laying the plastic wrapper aside for the moment as he quickly opened the bottle and leaned up on his elbows to cover the fingers on one hand with the slick liquid.

Clicking the bottle shut and tossing is aside, he smiled down at Troye again leaned back down to nuzzle his neck, pulling gently at the soft skin with his lips while reaching down in between their bodies. As his fingertips found Troye’s entrance, Tyler sucked at his neck with a bit more purpose.

Troye gasped and tilted his head back; in pleasure or offering, Tyler wasn’t sure. It didn’t matter which as he sank two fingers inside and was rewarded with a moan of approval, Troye’s fingers tugging at his hair to guide Tyler’s mouth further up his neck to a patch of skin that Tyler knew was particularly sensitive. He let his teeth graze the spot and curled his fingers upward, finding and pressing against the firm little bundle of nerves with unerring accuracy. Troye gave a breathless mewl and tilted his hips, bearing down on Tyler’s fingers while Tyler continued to rub unrelentingly over Troye’s prostate.

Pulling his fingers back, Tyler went to quickly add third and lifted his head from Troye’s neck to swallow his groan as he started moving them slowly. He could tell Troye was growing impatient by the increased speed of his breath and the ways his hips undulated to meet his fingers every time they sank inside again. After just a few pumps of his digits, Troye’s hips ever in motion underneath him, Troye tore his mouth away from Tyler’s to breathe against his lips.

“Tyler. Please…” A groan interrupted Troye’s words as Tyler pressed against his prostate again. Sighing when Tyler backed his fingers away, Troye continued in a whisper, “I need you inside me.”

Pecking Troye’s lips in silent acquisition, Tyler slowly withdrew his fingers and reached for the condom, sitting up on his knees to quickly remove the wrapper and roll it onto his length with slightly shaking hands. When it was securely in place, he leaned forward on his knuckles and hovered above Troye’s frame. Troye’s hands reached up to settle on his shoulders as Tyler bent his head to trail soft kisses from his neck up to his ear.

“Ready, baby?” Tyler whispered and felt Troye nod as he settled down against him again, but stopped short when Troye’s head suddenly turned from nodding to shaking from side to side.

“Wait,” Troye said and slid his hands from Tyler’s shoulders down to his chest. “Not like this.”

Tyler’s heart thumped and he lifted his head to frown in concern. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” Troye’s lips lifted into a comforting smile while Tyler’s frown deepened, not quite understanding what Troye was getting at. “Just, here – help me up.”

Troye lifted one of his hands in between them and Tyler rose up to sit back on his heels again, grabbing Troye’s hand and helping him sit up. Troye wound his arms around Tyler’s neck and quickly wiggled into his lap again. Tyler briefly noted the similar yet very different imitation of the night they’d first started all this.

“Like this,” Troye whispered around his smile and winked.

“Oh,” Tyler replied, not even trying to come up with anything more intelligent as his head swam at this new side of Troye. He seemed so relaxed, so completely at ease, and Tyler felt his heart swell at the thought of having Troye be this loving, teasing, _playful_ with him from this moment onward.

He was brought out of his short glimpse of the future when Troye lifted himself by his arms around Tyler’s shoulders to move closer, pressing their chests together. Tyler let his hands fall to Troye’s hips, splaying his fingers out over the dip in his spine.

The gentle laughter was gone from Troye’s face to be replaced with a gleam of determination in his darkened eyes and he held Tyler’s gaze as he reached down behind himself to place the tip of Tyler’s length at his entrance. And then he was pressing down.

Tyler moaned and captured Troye’s mouth in a deep kiss, his heart beating wildly in his chest. Feeling as well as hearing Troye’s breathing hitch on a whimper, Tyler felt long legs lift to fold over the small of his back as Troye sank lower.

Some breathless moments later, Tyler’s hips met Troye’s skin and he moaned long and deep as he used his hands to press Troye down even tighter against him, needing to be as close as possible. They paused there; Tyler reveling in the gently pulsing heat that enveloped him while losing himself in the wonder of Troye’s lips and the soft caresses of his tongue against his own.

Troye carefully moved his hips, slowly inching away before rolling them forward again. He moaned into Tyler’s mouth, his lips pausing for a short moment before resuming their kiss again. Tyler’s fingertips curled into the flesh on Troye’s back as quivering muscles clenched involuntarily around the base of his erection and Troye rolled his hips again, more deliberately this time.

Tyler practically ripped his lips from Troye’s on a gasp, the need for air starting to burn his lungs. He clutched at Troye’s back as he leaned their foreheads together to breathe rapid, shallow puffs into the space between them. Starting a slow rhythm, Tyler began lifting his own hips to meet Troye’s every downward movement.

Troye let his head fall forward to rest his cheek against his own upper arm where it was wrapped over Tyler’s shoulder, his breath ruffling the hair behind Tyler’s ear. Tyler bent his head to lap sucking kisses onto Troye’s neck. He held him close while Troye moved in gently rolling waves in his lap and Tyler continued to give gentle thrusts of his own as their rhythm grew steadily stronger, firmer.

Troye felt incredible like this and Tyler would have surely wept at the perfection of the man in his arms, if it wasn’t for the simmering heat of their embrace. His heart surged as their connection overshadowed everything Tyler had ever felt before, everything he thought he’d known. It was gentle and steady, close and loving, their breaths hitching and gasping.

While he listened to the melody of Troye’s soft, breathy moans, Tyler realized that this was what it was supposed to be like. He’d been a fool to ever believe differently and suddenly it felt imperative that Troye understood just how much Tyler had always treasured him.

“Remember our first night together?” he murmured against Troye’s neck, opening his eyes when Troye lifted his head to look at him through thick lashes, both of them still moving, rising and falling together.

“Of course,” Troye breathed and licked his lips. “I’ll never forget it.”

“What you said back then, about kissing being worth more when it’s with someone you care about,” Tyler paused and at Troye’s slow nod, he continued. “It stayed with me. I know we never made any promises, but I want you to know that ever since that night, I haven’t allowed anyone else to kiss me.”

The fingers on Tyler’s shoulders tightened as Troye gasped, his hips briefly losing their rhythm as he gazed wide-eyed at Tyler. “You haven’t?” he whispered.

Tyler shook his head and lifted one of his hands brush Troye’s slightly damp fringe from his eyes before stroking his fingertips over his ear and settling his hand over the back of his neck. “I haven’t wanted to. There’s only been you, Troye,” Tyler whispered. “Only you.”

There was a short beat of a second when everything seemed to still, where Troye was simply looking at Tyler as if processing the meaning of his words. Then time started to move again and Troye crashed their lips together with a keening moan, quickly deepening their kiss as his arms tightened around Tyler’s shoulders.

Tyler let out a muffled groan, his lips tingling under the pressure of Troye’s as his arms gripped him close, one hand still on Troye’s neck and the other wrapping around his waist. The heat of the room rose exponentially with their increasing pace, suddenly growing frenzied as they moved together in billowing surges, striving towards a rapidly approaching climax. Breathing shallowly through their noses, their harsh, shorts breaths rushed across the other’s cheek, and Tyler felt as if his entire being, all that he was, was narrowing into a pinpoint of sensations and emotions so intense he thought he might perish under their weight.

Troye was beginning to shake in Tyler’s embrace from the strain on his tense muscles and he gave a series of ‘mph’s against Tyler’s lips, steadily rising in volume and pitch with every grinding motion of his hips. Thrusting upward in short jabs, Tyler knew he was close. Troye’s movements grew stuttered and were soon reduced to quick, jerking snaps until finally, his head fell back and a cry left his throat as his back went rigid.

His thighs clamped around Tyler’s waist as his body convulsed, writhing in Tyler’s arms as strong, rippling muscles brought Tyler to his own mind-numbing release where he was buried inside Troye. Tyler moaned loudly, the sound almost a sob as his head fell forward to rest against Troye’s shoulder, his warm breath washing over the flushed skin of Troye’s chest.

The sound of sharp gasping and whimpered moans echoed around them while they rode out their orgasms, long tremors of pleasure wracking their bodies. As the involuntary shivers started to slow and dwindle, Tyler repositioned his hands, stroking them down Troye’s perspiring back. He blinked his eyes open and lifted his head, quickly meeting Troye’s lidded gaze, wondering if he’d ever again know anything as beautiful as that very moment in time.

Like the cleansing shower of a summer rain washing away the arid remains of a long draught, they met in a slow kiss; all soft, relaxed lips and gently flickering tongues while still trying to regain control of their breathing. Holding Troye securely in his arms, Tyler slowly leaned forward to set him down on the bed and settled on top, reluctant to break their connection just yet.

When their kiss became simple presses of lips against lips, their breaths slowing in the same manner, Tyler shifted onto his side and reached down to remove and tie off the condom. Neither of them had the energy to leave the warm bed, nor were they particularly bothered about cleaning up right then, so Tyler dropped the condom over the side of the bed and quickly snuggled back into the warm sheet as he lifted the cover over their bodies.

Settling down to face each other, no words were needed while they studied each other’s features. Tyler stroked his fingers over Troye’s still flushed cheek and smiled gently when Troye’s hand covered his, weaving their fingers together and moving their connected hands to fall into the short space between their chests. His heart beat in a steady rhythm, filled with reassuring warmth that spread to settle in every corner of his soul.

They stayed silent, holding the other’s gaze until their eyelids began to flutter, the events of the night finally catching up with them and tugging them towards a deep, well-deserved rest.

-x-

A gently tickling sensation coaxed Tyler from the depths of slumber. The feeling was centered on his mouth and it didn’t take him long after reaching the surface of consciousness to comprehend what the soft tugs on his lips were.

Eyes still closed and heart fluttering jovially in his chest, he smiled slowly and leaned into the touch. Turning Troye’s pecking kisses into something a bit firmer, Tyler pulled him closer with arms that were already wrapped around Troye’s sleep-warm body.

Troye sighed softly, quickly handing over control of their kiss to Tyler and purring from deep in his chest as his arms found their way up around Tyler’s neck, entwining their legs underneath the cover. They had stayed on their sides through the entire night and, as cliché as it might sound, slept peacefully in each others arms.

With one last peck, Tyler eventually leaned back to open his eyes, squinting slightly in the bright light of a sunny morning streaming in through his windows. He smiled as Troye’s lazily blinking eyes came into focus.

“Morning, beautiful,” Tyler murmured and couldn’t resist tilting his head for another short kiss.

“Morning… handsome?” Troye finished on a question and lifted one of his eyebrows while the other scrunched up in a doubtful manner.

Tyler felt his lips spread into a wide smile and he laughed in amusement while Troye’s expression morphed into a smile of his own. “You don’t have to call me anything other than my name if you don’t want to. Pet names are just one of those things I do, I guess,” he said as he stroked his hand over Troye’s back.

“So what happened to ‘gorgeous’ then?” Troye smiled. Tyler’s reply was quick since he didn’t really have to think about it.

“You upgraded.”

A short laugh left Troye’s lips while a blush rose over his cheeks, making him look even more wonderful, if that was even possible. “I think I liked ‘gorgeous’ better,” he said, lowering his gaze while his index finger reached out to trace a lazy pattern on Tyler’s chest.

“Really?” Tyler asked. “Why?”

Troye shrugged, still watching his fingertip as it swirled randomly across Tyler’s skin. “You’ve called me that ever since we met. And I don’t know… A lot of things can be beautiful, but there’s something special about being gorgeous, you know?”

Tyler’s smile grew gentle as he continued to enjoy Troye’s blush. “You’re both.”

“Stop it.” Troye’s eyes lifted to catch Tyler’s again, his smile turning bashful.

“Not happening, sorry ‘bout it,” Tyler mimicked Troye’s earlier shrug and tried to look unapologetic, knowing he was failing miserably when Troye rolled his eyes. Soft laughs rose from them both before they fell silent and Troye spoke after a moment.

“You’re both of those too, you know… and adorable,” he smiled gently, his eyes seeming to almost glitter.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been called adorable before,” Tyler chuckled as his hand came to rest in the dip of Troye’s lower back, a soft patch of skin that he was suddenly growing addicted to.

“Well…” Troye said and inhaled deeply while letting his arm wrap around Tyler’s back and leaning in closer. “You’re also kind,” he dipped his head and gave Tyler’s upper arm a quick kiss.

“And generous,” a kiss to Tyler’s shoulder, “and funny, and romantic,” the pecks continued up to Tyler’s neck and Tyler tilted his head back a little while closing his eyes.

“And sexy,” Troye whispered against the skin just underneath Tyler’s jaw before leaning away to peck his lips. “And perfect.”

The heat rising in his own face told Tyler that he was the one blushing now and his smile felt so wide it was almost hurting his cheeks. He was used to getting compliments but these meant far more to him because it was Troye giving them. Tyler’s pulse jumped and grew a bit quicker as he opened his eyes again.

“Now _you_ stop it,” he whispered.

“Not happening, sorry ‘bout it,” Troye parroted Tyler’s words back at him through a smirk so smug that Tyler just had to wipe away. A mere split second later, Troye yelped as Tyler kissed him so hard that Troye's hand practically flailed to grip Tyler's shoulder to steady himself when Tyler rolled him over onto his back, pressing him into the pillows.

Tyler ripped his lips away with a loud smack and knew that he must’ve looked very pleased with himself while he took in Troye’s ruffled appearance with a smirk of his own.

“Last night wasn’t enough, was it?” Troye panted slightly.

“I will never get enough of you, gorgeous,” Tyler purred and pressed the slowly growing evidence of his arousal against Troye’s hip a bit more firmly. Troye swallowed visibly and lifted an eyebrow.

“Oh, so it’s back to gor-?”

He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence when Tyler silenced him with another kiss.

-x-

Tyler moved his hands in a rapid shimmy, rubbing the towel briskly over his hair to soak up the excess water. Having deemed it necessary after the second consecutive round they’d gone in bed earlier, Troye and he had just finished a long, blazing hot shower together. Quickly lowering the towel, Tyler was met by a giggle.

“Cute,” Troye smiled and inclined his head while glancing up at Tyler’s hair, which was standing up in every conceivable direction.

“You’re one to talk,” Tyler smiled and reached up to swipe his fingers through Troye’s equally messy curls before Troye swatted playfully at his lifted arm.

They stepped forward simultaneously to share a lingering kiss. The gesture already felt amazingly domestic and familiar, and Tyler’s heart swelled in joy. His mind was, however, slightly preoccupied by thoughts of what he was originally supposed to do that evening before he’d decided to leave everything behind for a few months. Thankfully, he hadn’t called and cancelled anything, or the opportunity would have probably been lost. And especially thanks to Troye for stopping him from doing anything so stupid to begin with.

“Remember that bar I took you to?” he asked as they finished the kiss.

Troye seemed to hesitate a little before nodding and tying his towel around his hips. “Um, yeah. What about it?”

“I’m the new bartender,” Tyler smiled carefully, not sure what Troye’s reaction would be. That place did, after all, hold some uncomfortable memories for them both.

“Oh? That doesn’t sound too bad.” Troye’s surprised tone didn’t give any indication that he was bothered at all and Tyler breathed a metaphorical sigh of relief. “Does that mean I’ll get to see you all hot and stuff in a black shirt and apron?” Troye’s tone turned teasing as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and Tyler laughed at seeing him so relaxed about the topic.

“Yeah, I guess so. I’m doing my first shift tonight, actually.” Tyler nibbled briefly on his lip before gathering enough courage to ask, “Would you like to come with me? I think Jonathan - you know, the pianist - is gonna be there too..?”

Letting the unspoken suggestion hang silent in the air between them, Tyler felt his heart thump wildly in anticipation of Troye’s response, hoping he’d say yes.

“Oh…” Troye breathed and glanced off to the side quickly before looking back into Tyler’s eyes. “I mean, yeah, I’d love to go with you. But I don’t know if… We’ll see about that other stuff, okay?”

His pulse slowing a little at Troye’s hesitant answer, which hadn’t technically been a ‘no’, Tyler gently stroked Troye’s cheek with his thumb as he held his jaw. “I know what you’re thinking, babe. And you know I’m sorry. But I can’t promise that I won’t screw up or keep from saying stupid things ever again.”

“I know that, Tyler,” Troye replied in something close to a whisper.

“But I want to try my hardest not to,” Tyler added around a small smile.

The corners of Troye’s lips lifted as he settled a hand on the left side of Tyler’s chest. “I say that’s a good start,” he said. “And I’ll try my hardest to never break your heart.”

Tyler’s heart soared in gratitude for the gentle soul it could finally call its mate and, standing in the middle of the brightly lit bathroom, neither of them wearing more than a pair of towels, Tyler leaned in and kissed Troye like the world was going to disappear.

-


	18. It's Been A Long Time Coming And I Can't Stop Now

**-* EPILOGUE *-**

“Ty – mmph – Tyler. I’m gonna be late.”

Troye’s words were muffled since his mouth was currently preoccupied by Tyler’s very adamant lips. Warm hands were holding him by his waist and pulling his middle away from the door behind him. His shoulders, however, were still pressed against it since he was trying to escape the embrace to be able to leave the apartment on time for once.

Tyler seemed like he was going to pretend that he didn’t hear him until he gave a swipe of his tongue over Troye’s bottom lip and leaned back a smidgeon. “Stay home with me today,” Tyler murmured before starting a line kisses from the corner of Troye’s mouth and across his cheek to his ear. “We’ll build a blanket fort and watch movies and make out.”

“I have work,” Troye chuckled at Tyler’s attempts at persuasion and gave a halfhearted push at Tyler’s shoulders.

These morning farewells at the front door had become somewhat of a routine in the last few months and if it didn’t still make his stomach do back flips like it was in the Olympic gymnastics team, he might have found it annoying. To Troye, however, this was just one of those cute little quirks that his loving boyfriend had.

Well.

He called it ‘loving’ and while that was certainly true, a word that befitted Tyler in moments like these was perhaps more ‘horny’ than anything else.

“Call in sick,” Tyler whispered and let the tip of his tongue catch and pull Troye’s earlobe into his mouth.

Troye sighed at Tyler’s little nibbling tugs on his ear and felt his smile widen as he let his eyes flutter shut for a moment. “Wouldn’t that look a little suspicious when we show up perfectly fine at the Christmas party later?” he argued through his smile. “Besides, you have to go to the bar soon enough too.”

Tyler gave a displeasured grunt against Troye’s skin and tightened his hands on his waist. “Ugh, don’t remind me.” His voice was a rumble of exasperation. “Actually, work can fuck off. It’s annoying and mean and just one big cock-block.”

“Okay true,” Troye conceded with a giggle and pushed at Tyler’s shoulders more firmly, giving him a pointed look when Tyler finally leaned back and caught his eyes. “But please keep from saying things like that out loud next week? My parents are gonna think you’re a bad influence.”

A slow smirk formed on Tyler’s lips. “I thought you liked that about me?”

“I’ll see you in a few hours, okay?” Troye ignored Tyler’s question but let his smile soften to show that Tyler wasn’t technically wrong.

A childish groan escaped the supposedly fully grown man in front of him and Tyler let his head fall forward onto Troye’s shoulder. “Fine,” Tyler said with a sigh. “I’ll just wallow in my misery and wilt away while you’re gone.”

“Were you always this melodramatic?” Troye laughed again and reached up to lift Tyler’s head by his chin, catching the sparkle of humor in his blue eyes. “Don’t forget to pick up your suit from the drycleaner’s.” Troye tilted his head to give Tyler a quick peck and continued in a softer voice. “See you later, Tilly. I love you.”

Tyler gave a little purr while catching Troye’s lips in another kiss, lingering a bit longer this time before leaning back again. “And I love you, gorgeous. So much.”

And then Troye was finally released from Tyler’s grip, even as a hand slid down to give Troye’s bum a quick squeeze while Troye reached for the doorknob.

“Bye,” Troye giggled again, reaching down behind him to wave away Tyler’s straying hand. Giving Tyler one last look, Troye turned around and left for work with a smile.

Since the night when they’d finally admitted their feelings for one another, which was a little over six months ago now, Troye’s life had changed dramatically and it was pretty much all for the better. He’d had a feeling about what Tyler might be like if and when he found someone to give his undivided attention and Troye had yet to be proven wrong regarding the positives of that feeling.

Yet Tyler still managed to surprise him every so often. And not just when it came to doing awfully romantic things like making him pancakes with nutella for breakfast in bed on lazy Sundays, or taking him to his favorite look-out spot with blankets and wine on a starry night.

Tyler also showed a careful patience while still being gently encouraging about Troye slowly finding his way back to music again. On their two month anniversary, something which Tyler had adamantly insisted warranted a celebration of at least some kind, Troye had woken up to find Tyler blushing adorably and handing him a beautiful leather-bound notebook wrapped in a bow.

“For ideas and stuff, you know… So you have someplace to write them down,” Tyler had murmured and Troye would have had to be shackled to the ground to keep from practically launching himself on Tyler to kiss him within an inch of his life... and other things of that nature.

That day had been the first time that Troye managed to find the courage to try singing along as the pianist rehearsed his set before the bar opened for the night.

Having Tyler as his boyfriend did involve more than romance in the emotional sense though. Let there be no misunderstandings about it – Tyler was still every bit the highly sexual creature he’d been before they’d decided to be exclusive. The difference, however, was that Troye was now the only one left to take the brunt of it. So to speak.

Not that he minded all that much…

When Tyler was done with his first shift at the bar all those months ago, Troye and he had gone back home to spend the rest of that weekend christening every flat surface in Tyler’s apartment – horizontal and vertical. Then they’d done the same thing to Troye’s apartment the week after.

And if they’d had sex a lot before then, it was nothing compared to the way they just couldn’t seem to keep their hands off of each other in the months that followed. Sometimes it was fast and hard, with scratching fingernails, biting teeth, and a furious pace that had them both reeling as they clutched desperately at one another. And other times it was slow and gentle, filled with breathy moans, caressing touches, whispered sweet nothings, and ‘yessss’ and ‘so good’ and ‘that’s it, baby’.

But regardless of the mood that overtook them during those moments, it was always loving and always included what they had denied themselves for so long before that - deep, lingering kisses.

In fact, they seemed almost attached, if not at the hips, then at least at the lips these days, even to the point where others had started commenting on it. Even Caspar, who’d been their most avid cheerleader from the very beginning and the man they had to thank for meeting at all, had things to say about it.

They were all out in a big group of friends at the bowling alley one night in early October, when Troye had suddenly scored an unexpected strike. He’d turned around to look back at his friends in shocked amazement, which had quickly turned into a squeal of surprise when he’d been promptly swept up in Tyler’s arms. Once Tyler set him down from the little spin they’d made, he’d peppered kisses over Troye’s scrunched up face, gushing about how proud he was of him and how amazing Troye was at everything he did.

Then he’d caught Troye’s mouth in a kiss so thorough and long that, while Troye was practically being dipped backwards in Tyler’s hold, Caspar had tapped Troye on the shoulder, asking if they were going for a new world record and if he should be calling in a representative from Guinness to time them. After stepping back from their long kiss, neither Tyler nor Troye had even had the decency to blush.

Everything wasn’t sunshine and roses though, which was something Troye was grateful for, because who wanted a life without any challenges? That would have been incredibly boring and thankfully, being Tyler’s boyfriend was anything but.

Many and regular were the times when Tyler insisted that a guy had looked at Troye for a little bit too long and shown a little bit too much interest when talking to him, no matter if it happened to be the guy at the check-out counter at their local convenience store or the pizza delivery.

When that happened, Troye would just roll his eyes at Tyler and ask him if he’d like Troye to wear a sign that said ‘PROPERTY OF TYLER OAKLEY. NO INTERACTION ALLOWED’, to which Tyler would huff and mutter a petulant “maybe it wouldn’t hurt” under his breath. Then Troye would proceed to kiss Tyler’s frown away.

Fewer, but a lot more explosive, were the instances when someone actually did hit on Troye when Tyler was there to witness it. Like that one night at the bar when Troye had just finished a short set with the pianist. A dark haired guy with a shy smile had stopped him on his way over to the bar counter where Tyler stood smiling proudly at him while serving drinks.

Troye heard approximately 3 seconds worth of the stranger stutteringly trying to ask for his phone number before a strong hand closed around his wrist and began pulling him away while Tyler’s voice growled “he’s taken” at the blinking man left in their wake. If Korey knew what Troye and Tyler had been doing in the back storage room once they emerged decidedly ruffled and flushed fifteen minutes later, he didn’t comment on it any further than lifting an eyebrow at the slowly fading teeth marks on Troye’s neck.

In other aspects, their life together had quickly settled into a comfortable sense of domesticity. Awfully convenient as it might seem, everything had just slotted into place pretty smoothly. Their personalities and differing skill sets and preferences meant that they complimented each other when it came to dealing with every day life. Tyler did most of the cooking while Troye made sure the dishes were done after. That sort of thing.

And even if he hadn’t actually asked Troye yet, Tyler had begun to make not-so-subtle suggestions that maybe it would be beneficial if Troye was to stay at his place more permanently, “since you spend so much time here anyway”, and “what’s the point in paying rent for a home you’re practically never in”, and so on.

And Troye, although apprehensive since it seemed a rather big step after such a short time of actual dating, was running out of arguments why they shouldn’t and had decided that he would agree next time Tyler brought it up again. In fact, the mere thought of them actually living together in a home of their own made him giddy.

Though, since they still had their separate apartments, Troye had prepared for the company Christmas party by bringing his change of clothes to Tyler’s. It wasn’t a gala or anything, but there would be a sitdown dinner and live orchestra – much like the event Troye and Tyler had first attended together, with the addition of a bit more tinsel. Tyler had even said that this time he would ask Troye to dance at some point during the night, something which Troye didn’t know if he should be looking forward to or view more as a threat.

Nevertheless, once he got home from work that afternoon, Troye had a quick shower and began getting ready for the night. Tyler had made sure he got the early shift that day and was due home any minute to change as well. Troye hummed quietly to himself as he ran the towel over his head one last time while walking towards the bedroom, where he’d placed his carefully ironed suit and shirt on a hanger over the closet door the night before. Lifting his head while tying the towel around his waist, Troye smiled when he saw that Tyler had added his own shirt on a hanger next to Troye’s.

Walking towards them, Troye lifted his hand to run his fingers down the strip of slate grey draped over the neck of his suit jacket and felt his smile soften in affection. His thoughts were drifting back to when Tyler and he had first started seeing each other just as he heard the door shut out in the hallway and Tyler’s voice call out his name.

“In here!” Troye shouted back and tugged the tie off from the hanger to look at it closer.

Tyler had decided that Troye should wear it when they’d gone on their first real date at a fancy restaurant and Troye hadn’t seen it since then. It had probably gotten lost in the jumble of clothes in Tyler’s closet and Troye had consequently forgotten about it over the months.

Troye was brought out of his trip down memory lane when a pair of hands snuck their way around his middle to settle just above his hipbones. A gust of warm breath rushed over the back of his neck before soft lips gave it a lingering kiss.

“I thought you might like wearing that tonight,” Tyler mumbled against his neck.

“Why?” Troye asked through his smile. He had his suspicions but still wanted to hear Tyler say it.

“Well, since tonight is an anniversary of sorts. I wore that the first night we met and it’s another company event, so...”

Feeling Tyler’s lips turn up into a smile against his skin, Troye lifted his head and nodded toward the tie hanging over Tyler’s shirt in front of them. “Is that why you insisted on getting that one?”

The tie that Tyler had picked out for himself while they were out shopping a few days earlier was a lighter silver, void of a pattern but just as sleek and shiny as the one Troye was holding in his hands. It had cost a fortune yet Tyler had been persistent, arguing that he just had to have it.

Tyler’s shoulders lifted in a shrug, brushing lightly against Troye’s bare shoulder blades. “We don’t have to do the matching thing if you don’t want to. It is kinda gross now that I think about it.”

A poorly hidden tone of uncertainty colored Tyler’s voice as he tried to back-pedal his way out of the idea and Troye was once again filled with warm affection for the man. He kept his smile gentle while turning around in Tyler’s embrace to meet his gaze. “You are a hopeless romantic, you know that right?” he said as he wound his arms around Tyler’s neck and leaned in to catch his lips.

“Mm…” Tyler hummed into their kiss as he reached out behind Troye to pluck the second tie from his hanger. He held it up, eyeing it speculatively for a moment before reaching up over his own shoulder and pulling one of Troye’s arms down between them, lifting his gaze back to Troye’s with a smirk.

“You might say that now, but you know, I can think of more things we could do with these other than wear them as accessories...” Tyler trailed off suggestively as he coiled the grey silk around Troye’s wrist in a couple of loops.

“I would be worried if you couldn’t,” Troye sniggered, even through the swooping sensation in his belly, and stepped back while giving Tyler a smirk of his own. “Now go get ready so we can get this party over with and I promise we’ll find out just how sturdy the headboard on your bed is later tonight.”

Two days later, while sat on a plane bound for Australia, Troye was looking out the tiny window on his right at the setting sun on the faraway horizon when he felt one of his hands being enfolded by another. Troye glanced down as Tyler’s fingers twined with his before looking up to his left. The fiery light of the sunset was lighting up Tyler’s face as he silently studied Troye’s features with an adoring smile. To Troye, Tyler had never been more beautiful than he was right then and there.

And in that very moment, Troye knew that the man holding his hand as well as his heart in a steady, comforting grip was everything he’d ever need in order to be granted his ‘happily ever after’.

**\- FIN -**


End file.
